24 Strata of the Human Instrument

"EMOTIONS"

HOW DOES THE BODY REACT TO ANGER?
Anger doesn't actually make the "blood boil" or your eyes "see red." But it does cause certain changes in the body. Here's what happens:

ADRENALINE and other chemicals pour into the bloodstream.
THE HEART pumps faster
BLOOD PRESSURE rises
BLOOD FLOW quickens
MUSCLES tense
 

In other words, the body shifts into high gear, generating energy needed for action.  Learn how this energy can work to your advantage or disadvantage. Knowing how to recognize and express anger appropriately can help you in reaching goals, solving problems and handling emergencies.   Ignoring anger does not work.  Failing to deal with your anger may lead to the following:

Uncontrolled anger can be dangerous.  It may lead to crime, abuse or more violent behavior.  Follow these steps to keep anger under control:

Remain levelheaded and keep your cool when expressing your anger.  Follow these "do's":

Remain levelheaded and keep your cool when expressing your anger.  These things need to be remembered:

Don't get personal and resort to insults and name-calling. These methods only cause more anger.
Don't avoid the issue and hide what you truly believe. Be direct, but don't get physical or violent.
Don't make accusations you will be sorry about later. Listen carefully to what the other person has to say before you draw any conclusions.
Don't sulk in silence. This won't solve your problem.

When you anger is escalating, remember the following:

Humor - Don't waste your energy becoming angry over minor problems that can't be helped. Find the humor in the situation.

 Physical Activity- Walking, golfing, weightlifting, can be an excellent outlet for angry feelings. Don't let competition or personal limitations frustrate you. (Consult your health-care provider before starting an exercise program.)

Rest and Relaxation- Get plenty of sleep to avoid irritability. Meditation, breathing exercises and deep muscular relaxation are also good ways to reduce tension.

Time Out- When you are angry, take time to calm down and think. Then discuss the issue with the person involved or with a friend.

Hobbies- Instead of flying off the handle put your energy into a carpentry project, pulling weeds in the garden or any hobby you enjoy.

When someone else reaches the boiling point keep your cool.  Don't answer anger with anger. Remember that anger can lead people to say things they really don't mean.  Be considerate.  If others are around, encourage the angry person to discuss his or her anger privately. This could prevent embarrassment. Be a good listener.  Often, angry people just need someone to listen as they "sound off."  Consider the cause of the anger.  Think about whether the angry person might feel better if he or she had fewer responsibilities, more time alone, more rest, etc.  Don’t take chances.  Sometimes, anger can lead to violence. If your safety appears to be threatened, get help immediately.

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Main Entry: 2disgust

Function: verb

Etymology: Middle French desgouster, from des- dis- + goust taste, from Latin gustus; akin to Latin gustare to taste -- more at CHOOSE

Date: 1616

transitive senses

1 : to provoke to loathing, repugnance, or aversion : be offensive to

2 : to cause (one) to lose an interest or intention

intransitive senses : to cause disgust

- dis·gust·ed adjective

- dis·gust·ed·ly adverb

What Is Sadness?

When you're sad, the world seems dark and unfriendly. You have

a hurt deep inside that crushes your heart and your spirit. Many

times you cry, and the tears are hard to stop. Crying usually makes

you feel better. When sadness starts to go away, it feels like a

heavy blanket is being lifted from your heart.

Loss is the most common cause of sadness. It's a very sad thing to lose someone or something that you care about. There are many kinds of loss. The death of a relative, friend, or pet can bring weeks or months of sad feelings. Other kinds of loss can also bring sadness, like people close to you getting a divorce or moving to a new town and leaving old friends. With this sadness, you might also feel angry or guilty, like you may have caused the loss - but you probably did not. Sometimes it is hard to think straight because you cannot get your mind off your loss. Usually, the load of sadness you carry after a loss will lighten over time, although there may always be a little bit of sadness left.

Relationships bring happiness and fun most of the time, but they can also bring sad times. Many kids fight with family members, especially their parents, in the struggle to grow up and gain independence. They fight about things like money, clothing, haircuts, school, friends, and cars. In school, problems with teachers and grades may cause periods of sadness as well. Other kids both friends and enemies, can cause hurt feelings and sadness through fighting, teasing, peer pressure, not giving you support, or leaving you out of group activities.

Self-image, the way you feel about yourself, can be a big reason for sad feelings. Most people, even adults, are not completely happy with the way they look. Many people feel that they are not as good as they would like to be in sports or in school. And lots of people feel shy when talking to other people (especially with members of the opposite sex).

When Is Sadness a Problem?

If sad feelings go on for too long, it's called depression. Here are some of the signs and symptoms that can be seen with depression:

1.        feeling anxious, "empty," or "numb"

2.        feeling hopeless, like there's nothing to look forward to

3.        feeling guilty or worthless

4.        feeling lonely or unloved

5.        losing interest in regular activities - things are not fun anymore

6.        having difficulty concentrating in school and when doing homework - sometimes grades fall

7.        having difficulty concentrating on other activities, like reading or watching TV - not remembering what a book or a TV show was about

8.        having less energy and feeling tired all the time

9.        sleeping too much or not enough

10.        not eating enough (smaller appetite) and weight loss, or eating too much (bigger appetite) and weight gain

11.        thinking about death - or sometimes attempting suicide

12.        spending less time with friends and more time alone

13.     frequently crying, often for no obvious reason

14.     feeling irritable (every little thing gets on your nerves)

15.     feeling restless (being unable to sit still or relax)

16.     having physical complaints, such as dry mouth, dry skin, difficulty having bowel movements, headaches, stomach or chest pain, vomiting, dizziness. 

People who have depression may not know it. Often it's a parent or teacher who notices behavior changes. Sometimes depression can occur for no obvious reason. Sometimes it runs in families. Other times there is an apparent reason, like a long period of sadness after the loss of someone really close, such as a parent; problems at home, including violence, illness, divorce, or alcohol or drug use; child abuse or neglect; rape; and long-term illness, burns, or accidents.

Getting Help

It's very important for people who have depression to get help. When they do, they can get better quickly. Sometimes treatment involves talking to someone who knows all about depression. Sometimes it means taking medications. Sometimes both of these things are used.

If you think you have depression, or you just have sadness that simply will not go away, it is important to talk to an adult about it: a parent, relative, doctor, teacher, guidance counselor, coach, minister, or close adult friend. This person can help find the right type of treatment. Many cities also have mental health hot lines or suicide hotlines that are listed in the phone book. There is always somebody to talk to - somebody who can help.

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Charming Points of Korean Buddhism

Fear is ignorance, blindness, prejudice, and misunderstanding. Fear is illusion. Fear is the only problem in our human story. Fear is the illusory belief system, which says that we are separated, lacking and trapped. Fear is the unawareness, which prompts our foolishness. Fear is the mainspring of our lies and deceptions. Fear is the wrongful use of imagination. Fear is the basis of all our symptoms. Fear is what we need to be aware of and to see through. FEARLESS is an interesting motto but LOVINGNESS would be a better one. If fear is illusory, we don’t need to fuel and energize such thoughts, feelings and activities any more. Love is the basis of the absolute sacredness of individuality. Love is the awareness that each person is completely and absolutely an individual expression of the ONE LOVE. Love is the insightful awareness that fear is an illusion. Fear is the notion that perfection and love are illusions. Love and fear are mutually exclusive. Perfect love casts out fear.

Psychologists talk about rational and irrational fears. Once you admit that any fear is rational, the floodgate is opened and every plague known to mankind enters that door. We should be afraid of trucks, war, germs, robbery, disease and death? Insurance companies are the richest companies in the world, and are fear-based. DSM IV is full of phobias and compulsions as well as addictions, all of which are fear-based. The word "cancer" carries tons of fear. All of our human stories are tinged with fear and survival reactions and tactics. Some of the great ones have said "Fear not." Or "Love and do as you please." True perception sees only love and only Good everywhere, inside and out, whether we are alone or together.

To see evil is to experience fear. "Resist not evil" means to keep your eye on the Good, on love. You can find many reasons to fear anything, but you only need one reason to see Good and Love: only Love is real. Rational fear is not rational. Why would love step in front of a truck? Examine that. Our fears are immature and our loves have to grow until they reach maturity or perfection, and then fear is gone. Gone where? It never was real.

We do many stupid things out of ignorance, and fear is ignorance. Love educates. Fear blocks true learning. Fear says that love is limited, weak and exhaustible, undependable, unreliable, unable to work in the world of business, politics, rehabilitation of criminals, prevention of drug abuse and alcohol abuse. But when it has been tried, it has worked. A whole book could be written on this. Fear says that love does not protect you from harm, and that there are many harms in the world that we need protecting from. We sell our souls for love because we believe we lack it. The reason we have a problem with love is that love is trust. The ego prefers the control tactics of fear because we think fear is real and that control works better than trust. Hawkins’ kineosology proves that fear weakens. We spend a whole lifetime trying to control, and we fail, because there is nothing to control. Why does love need controlling? Why would you need to beg and fight for a cup of water when have a river inside of you?

Fear controls our mind. Love and all of its symbols are all that we could want. What are love’s symbols? Money and stuff. We are obsessed with money and stuff because they represent love, which we can’t see and don’t think, exists. Things can become empty symbols of love when we cling to them instead of enjoying what they represent. All of the things in the world will not compensate for the awareness of what they represent. Possessions are simply love in form. Forms change. Nathan had motorcycles, cars, trucks, three wheelers, and a new house, but he lost his beloved. Now these toys mean nothing. All of the things he possessed did not make him a man. Only the awareness of love and its meaning makes a man. Power without love becomes powerlessness. Possessions without love leave one possessed and empty. Control and dependence on fear is a poor substitute for the trust in love.

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It is an agreed fact that all the creatures want happiness and are afraid of pain and grief. The question, however, is 'what is real happiness?' What really is called happiness? The desire for happiness has no meaning without understanding the real nature of happiness.

Generally, ordinary beings consider sensual pleasures as happiness and their attempts are also directed towards these. According to them search for happiness means search for pleasures of the senses. The question 'what is happiness' does not arise in their hearts, because in their hearts they treat life full of sensory joys as a happy life.

It is on account of this that whenever we think of happiness and welfare, it is considered desirable to lead a life of attachments, work hard, grow more food and develop industries and science. The country will prosper by all these and all will be happy. Ideals are talked of and it is said that a day will come when everyone will have nutritious food to eat, clothes to put on according to variations of seasons and modern residence with all scientific facilities and then all will be happy.

We do not want to discuss whether such conditions will prevail or not. Our question is, if after having all these comforts, life will be happy. If yes, people having all these comforts, should be happy even now. The countries touching the limitations of all these comforts must, then, have all happy and quiet people. We, however, find that all on this earth are disturbed, impatient, unhappy, afraid and worried. It is, therefore necessary to consider seriously what happiness really is. W cannot make true efforts in this direction and achieve happiness without once for all deciding what real happiness is.

Some thinkers go ahead and say, "Happiness does not lie in objects of enjoyment; happiness or unhappiness lies in imagination". To prove their belief they give examples like the one following: A man has a two-story house; on the right is a five story building and on the left a cottage. When he sees right, he feels unhappy and when he sees left he feels happy. As such happiness does not lie in possession of sensory objects, but in imagination. They advise people to look towards those, who have fewer possessions and be happy. If you look towards people having more wealth and possessions, you will always be unhappy.

It is unreasonable to hold that happiness lies in imagination. "If you want to be happy look towards the poor". Those poor people cannot satisfy even their needs. Seeing such poverty-stricken people even worldly-minded people develop pity. It is unkind to regard one happy by imagining that one is better than the poor and the unhappy. This attitude also satisfies the sense of pride of possessions. This can never be called happiness. Does happiness lie in the cottage, looking at which one can get happiness? Unless we really find where happiness lies, we cannot really be happy.

This means to happiness is also not correct, because here also it has not been attempted to know what happiness is; pleasures arising out of sensual joys have been treated as happiness. It has been held that happiness lies in imagination. Shall we, therefore, believe the real happiness does not exactly exist, but this would not be acceptable to anybody. It is, therefore, clear that in fact, sensual pleasures are imaginary and real happiness is quite different from these. The original question, 'What is real happiness' stands.

Some ask people to do this and do that and say, "This way your desires would be satisfied. You would get the desired objects and become happy". People holding these views regard happiness as satisfaction of desires and unhappiness as denial thereof.

First of all, it is not possible to satisfy one's desires because there are countless desires of countless people and the material things are limited. Then new desires arise as soon as the previous ones are satisfied. Thus the eternal current of desires continues forever. It is, therefore, definite that ever changing desires can never be satisfied. Conceptions like those of satisfaction of desires and achieving consequent happiness are merely mirage in the ocean of the great desert of life. All the desires are never going to be satisfied and this creature is never going to be happy in the satisfaction of desires.

In reality happiness does not lie in the satisfaction of desires. This is like being happy by transferring the burden of head to the shoulder. It is also not correct to say that we will be happy proportionately with the desires satisfied, because real happiness lies in the absence of desires, not in their satisfaction. Because we reduce our restlessness in partial absence of desires, it can, therefore, naturally be understood that complete absence of desires will lead us to complete happiness. It is wrong to say that desire dies out after its fulfillment and that should be regarded as happiness, because absence of desires does not mean their satisfaction, but their absolute absence.

Pleasures arising out of several joys are not happiness. They are, in fact, unhappiness because they have the restlessness, which makes one unhappy. Happiness means ease and complete lack of restlessness and pleasures of senses do not have that mental ease. Whatever we enjoy with the help of the senses is sensual pleasure only. It is a kind of unhappiness. It is happiness in name only. Psychic bliss is above senses and cannot be had from their objects. Just as the soul, being psychic cannot be achieved with the help of the senses; non-sensory happiness, being in the nature of the soul, cannot be obtained with the help of the senses.

We have to find a thing, where it is. How can we find it where it is not possible to have it at all? For example, consciousness is an attribute of the soul, and can be found in the sentient soul only, not in inanimate entities. Likewise happiness is also an attribute of the soul, not of inanimate beings. Happiness can, therefore, be had in the soul only, not in inanimate objects like human bodies. This soul does not know itself and is, therefore, wandering with wrong faith; in the same manner this being attempts to find happiness in non-self objects and that is the root cause of his unhappiness. The direction of the search for happiness itself is wrong. When the direction is wrong, the present state will also be full of unhappiness. For getting real happiness, we have to see within, to know our own being, for our happiness lies in ourselves. The soul is a depository of eternal bliss, full of everlasting joy. Therefore, those, in pursuit of happiness should turn their efforts towards their inner beings. Those looking for happiness elsewhere, will never get it.

Real happiness is a matter of experience, not of speech, not of demonstration. It can be had only by being introvert, cutting ourselves from all the non-self entities and being one with our soul itself. Since the soul is full of happiness, experience of the soul is the experience of happiness. Just as one cannot achieve the soul without experience, in the same manner one cannot get real happiness without the experience of the soul.

If we ponder deeply over the question, we realize that happiness is not to be had from somewhere else, for the soul is itself made of this happiness, is nothing but happiness alone. That which is happiness incarnate has not to find happiness anywhere else. Happiness is not to be possessed; it is to be enjoyed, to be experienced. It is not necessary to torment us for getting happiness. There is no trouble whatsoever in happiness; restlessness has no happiness. Restlessness is itself unhappiness and its absence are happiness. As such there should be no desire for happiness, for desires themselves make us unhappy. Absence of desires is real happiness.

To all questions like, 'what is happiness?'. Where does it lie?' 'How shall we get it?' there is only one answer, only one solution and that is the experience of the soul itself. The first and the foremost means to achieving it is the pondering over the fundamentals of life. However, we should remember that the real experience of the soul is born of the absence of this pondering over the fundamentals of life. Separate treatment is desirable for questions like 'Who am I?' 'What is soul?' and 'How is self experience achieved?'

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What is Happiness