*Insomnia*

*Another moment passes, yet still I cannot banish it from my mind. Every waking minute and all I can think of is the thrill, the rush, the pure satisfaction of killing another...Wait, why do I feel this way? I am a member of a "hot boyband", #1 on all the charts, so why do these thoughts enter my mind? Has my life somehow been unfulfilled? Am I that selfish of a person? I'm not sure, this is just something I ponder. Currently, as I am living out this "boyband" dream life, I am sitting in the window seat of first class. The other guys are watching some movie. I feel I have to write these feelings down, however, because if I don't then they will take over my mind and perhaps something bad will happen...but, would it be so bad? Oh, come on, of course it will. See, this is how my mind is. Constantly my subconcious is battling with the concious and sometimes I wonder whether I'm actually going through things or if it is just in my mind. These aren't just feelings that come and go. It's like an obsession. This thing, this obsession, always come back to haunt me no matter what I may be doing. Visions racing through my mind as if they're on a movie projector screen. Maybe if I could actually get some sleep I wouldn't feel like crap all the time, but this thought never leaves my thoughts. I only hope that one day I don't snap and do end up killing someone. Someone I love or even someone I hate. It doesn't matter, murder is all the same no matter who the victim is. The only thing that matters is who the suspect is and what "went wrong" with them. Well, answer that for me. What "went wrong" with me? If I knew that answer, life would be much easier. But, I have to go now, cause it seems the plane has landed and I have a meeting to go to with the rest of the group members. Our group: NSYNC.*

~In The Conference Room~

All 5 members of NSYNC joined Johnny, their manager and longtime friend, in the conference room for a little meeting of their upcoming scheduled events. They quickly got seated around a long, mahoghany table, and looked up at Johnny with anticipation for what he had to say.

Johnny placed the manila folders he had in his hand, on the table in front of him. He was still standing, wanting to keep the attention of all in attendance, but knowing he couldn't for too long, because after all, he knew these people.

"Well, I'm sure none of you will be disappointed.by what I have to say." Johnny said, as he looked up at each of their bright and cheery faces, (haha, what a joke) as they were focused on every word he was saying...well, almost everyone. Chris was playing paper 'football' with Joey. However, Joey was attempting to pay attention, so the 'football' kept hitting him on the side of the face.

"CHRIS! STOP ALREADY!!!" Jeoy yelled from across the table. Everyone stopped and looked in their direction.

"Ooh, I think my little sister can makeup a better comeback than that!" Chris jeered.

"Oh shut up, you jackass. It's getting old, kinda like you are, so stop now before you hurt yourself...old man." Joey jeered back.

"Oh you little...." Chris glared at Joey from across the table and kicked him under the table. Joey yelped, but they Johnny interrupted.

"Guys! Do you want me to leave and not tell you anything? You are wasting valuable time and acting like 5 year olds! I don't have to be here, but this is for your benefit, SO LISTEN!" Johnny reprimanded. The guys got quiet real quick and Johnny made sure that all attention was back on him before he continued.

"Good, well...going on. I'm sure, after just having an exhausting tour, that you'll love to hear that you'll have a 3-day break before the Billboard Music Awards. These days will be spent in New York City. Every celebrity invited to the awards will also be there these 3 days, unless they are arriving a little later. Any questions?" Johnny asked, looking over his checklist.

Everyone replied no except JC, "So what day do we get to leave?"

"Tomorrow. A limo will take each of you from here to your house tonight. You'll spend the night there and then in the morning--EARLY in the morning, a limo will pick you up to transport you to the airport. So, get packing and have fun. I have some packing of my own to do. Excuse me." Johnny answered as he turned and left the room.

All the guys were standing and ready to leave before the door had time to close. They walked out and to their bus to get anything they'd need for the next 3 days that they had left there. After the 3 days, they'd get to return here to Orlando and resume touring the East Coast.

*Journal, today was a great day. The guys and I went to see Johnny and he told us we have a 5-day break from touring. Well, kind of a break. It's to do an award's show. Another one comes, another one goes. We get an award and the other fuckers don't. All the biggest celebrities will be there. It'll be a great time to meet lots of new people...and maybe I'll forget about these thoughts...or maybe I'll act on them...we'll have to see. Well, it's an early day tomorrow. I'll try to get some sleep, once more. More later....*

~Morning/His thoughts~

Another sleepness night-oh joy. I feel like crap, I look like crap. Another 5 minutes and I'll be on my way to the airport to meet the rest of the guys. My girlfriend called last night to inform me that she won't be arriving immediately. The news just keeps getting better and better. Well, the limo's here.

~At the Airport~

"There's JC! Finally, we can get out of here!" Joey announced.

"Shut up, we're trying not to be noticed." Chris scolded. "I don't feel like running down the terminal today."

Joey, in the meantime, was mocking every move Chris made while he was complaining. "Well, it seems that someone is a little grouch this morning. But then again, that'd be every morning. Wouldn't you agree, Lance?"

"Oh don't even think of dragging me into this." Lance responded, as he lowered his hat and walked over to where Justin was standing.

"Well, he's no fun anyway." Joey said, joining the rest of the gang.

Chris just rolled his eyes as he picked up his bag and followed the others to their gate. Lonnie, Mike, and Andre, their bodyguards, were close behind them.

As they got seated on the plane, everyone started to do their own thing. Today, they had their own personal plane, due to the amount of people that had to come with them. A lot of members of their crew were there, seated behind them. The bodyguards were in the very back and Johnny was sitting right in front. All the guys were busy listening to music, sleeping, or watching a movie on the screen in front of them. Chris, JC, and Justin were making use of their blankets and pillows, and Lance was speaking to some clients on his cell phone.

This routine continued until until JC woke up and headed to the bathroom.

"Justin, you awake?" Joey loudly whispered. Justin's eyes were closed. He cocked his head to one side and opened one eye.

"I am now."

"Do you think something's wrong with JC?"

"No, why are you asking?" Justin asked, as he repositioned himself in his seat.

"Well, he looks a little pale lately and hasn't been talking much."

"So? I haven't been talking much either. And, plus, he probably has a lot on his mind. This tour probably exhausted him. This break will be a good time for him to recover-for us, actually." Justin answered, before placing his headphones on.

"I hope you're right." Joey mumbled to himself as JC returned.

"What are you looking at?" JC asked, as he sat down.

"Nothing, nothing at all." Joey said, as he turned and began looking out the window.

The rest of the trip was spent in silence, beside the occasional interruption from the pilot and the conversations going on among the crew.

*Journal, Well, I was actually able to get some sleep on the plane. I still feel like shit though. I hope no one suspects anything. I'm trying to remain calm. The guys and I got settled in the hotel and everything. Now, we are going to go meet some of the celebrities that are already here. Seems like a waste of time to me, but Johnny says it's necessary. Well, I gotta go, they're already knocking on my door.*

All the guys walked downstairs to the bar. There was a dance floor next door and a lot of celebrities were gathered around. Some reporters had gotten inside and there were photos going off in every direction. Joey walked straight through to the dance floor and began dancing as usual. Anything to get all the attention on him. JC and Chris went to get some drinks from the bar, as Justin and Lance sat down at the table.

"Aren't you going to dance? That's kind of unusual." Lance said, trying to start a conversation, as he scanned the crowd.

"Well, I'm kind of tired from the tour and stuff. Hey, Just tell the guys I went to my room to get some sleep, ok?" Justin said, as he got up quickly and walked off.

Lance was a little confused with Justin's behavior, but that was quickly forgotten when JC and Chris returned to the table with the drinks. He told them that Justin went to his room.

"Wonder what's wrong with him?" JC asked, as he took a drink of his martini.

"I don't know. He said he was tired from the tour." Lance answered. "Hey, I'm gonna go talk to Willa over here." He pointed, meaning Willa Ford, and within seconds was gone.

The whole night was a blast. Everyone had a lot of fun and it was a good way to relax. JC and Chris had gotten to talk to Brian McKnight, Beyonce Knowles, Christina Aguilera, Ricky Martin, and a slew of other celebrities that they knew. It was great to see them again. Joey was lost among a group of girls on the dance floor. Finally, at around 1 AM, JC, Lance, and Chris went back to their rooms. All of their rooms were across from each other. JC was rooming with Justin during this trip. He opened the door to the room quietly, thinking Justin would be asleep. But, Justin wasn't asleep. Justin had been reading JC's journal, but as soon as he heard the door start to open, he slammed it down on the beside table, where it had been lying before.

"Hey Justin, I thought you'd be asleep." JC said, as he closed the door and walked in.

"Oh, well I watched some TV and stuff. Really, the time just flew by. How was the party?" Justin asked, hurriedly, as he got up and started to walk to the bathroom.

"It was really cool. Really, you should have come. There was a lot of people there that you would have liked to talk to." JC said, but then he noticed his journal on the table. "Hey, wasn't this inside the drawer?" He asked outloud, to himself.

"It's been there the whole time." Justin lied, as he walked into the bathroom. Hehehe....oh, the fun I shall have.

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