BURN, BABY, BURN!

TROPHIES....................by Coralynn

"The Judge is coming to award August trophies today," William announces to the assembled villagers in the square. "Trophies will be given for the best garden, the best livestock, the most authentic house, and the most successful enterprise overall."
"Whoopee," WandaSue says to herself as she picks the last of the scabs off her arms from where the poison ivy scratching has rubbed it raw.
"Be ready!" William adds and dismisses them.
Penny and Sallyof house #2, give each other woeful looks. The 'house' they now occupy consists of a few boards over which some of the tents no one is using anymore are stretched. It is a ragtag proposition.
Eleanor, Celeste, Marilyn and Bess of house #1, smile expectantly. Their corn is ready to pick and their cows, sheep, pigs and chickens are thriving.
House #3, where the two married couples live, has a sagging roof from the storm a few weeks earlier, plus some of their chickens have escaped to God knows where. They hear an occasional rooster crow from the woods, but have been unsuccessful in bringing it back to the fold.
House #4, where Daniel, Rafe, Hots and Jerry live, looks four-square and the garden is almost as good as the one around house #1. One of their cows no longer gives milk, though, as she was neglected and not milked on a regular basis. They hope the Judge doesn't notice.
House $5, belonging to Henry8, Luke, Mike, Moose, Slim and Travis, has a missing front door. No one is sure just where it went, but one morning they got up and it was gone. They suspect the women of house #2, but have no proof. Their corn has corn bores, something they hope the judge won't investigate closely enough to notice.

Doc Diamond, and Reverend Jim Philbrook watch as the cameramen, who also live in the Doc's house, film the scene in the village square.
"This is going to be pretty good!" Jim says happily, "unless the judge is going to look at the church. He isn't going to, is he?"
"No. He doesn't care about the church. You aren't in the official contest."
"OH? There's a contest? Why didn't anyone tell me?"
"Because the doctor and the minister aren't part of it."
"Is it too late to get in the contest?"
"Yes. Way too late."
"What's the prize?"
"A million dollars."
Jim whisles and exclaims, "That's a lot......isn't it?"
"Yes."
"My grandfather was a millionaire."
"Really, I didn't know that!"
"Ohhhhh yeah, he owned a lot of houses. One on Elm Street, one on Crescent parkway, and one on Winding Willow!"
"Who lives in them now?"
Jim scratches the side of his head, "Uhhhhhhh, ya know, I have no idea! HUH! Silly me!"
"I hear the Judge's car now........"
"Really?! My God, you have excellent hearing, Doc."
"Look out the window. There he is...."
"Should I hide?"
"Whatever for?"
"I don;t know........but if it's all the same to you, I'm going back to my room and" .......he tries to think of an excuse...........then never finishes the sentence as he shuffles back to the guest room.
Daisy Moonbeam Freedom looks out the door of the parsonage, where she has been living the last few weeks and snifs, "Who needs a trophy? I'm going to leave here with my true love!"

The sky is full of dark clouds as the Judge walks from one house to the next, examining in excruciatingly close detail every facet of the house, the garden, and the livestock.
The occupants of the houses that think they have a chance of winning, namely house #1 and house #4, wait in eager anticipation. The guys in house #4 hold their breaths as the Judge examines the cows. When he gets no milk from the dried-up cow, he sighs and writes it on his examination paper. Daniel, Rafe, Hots and Jerry exchange defeated glances.

Rev. James Philbrook keeps tabs on the proceedings from his vantage point in the rectory, peering out the window to see what's going on, plus to make sure Daisy isn't trying to snare him. He sees her take up her post on the tree stump in the front yard, but that's as close as she has come in the last few days.
"I feel like a prisoner in here!" he complains to Doc Diamond.
"Better that than having that obnoxious woman draped around your neck like a medallion!" the Doc laughs. "Another month and we'll be out of here. Hopefully she won't be able to track you after that."
"HA! Don't count on it!" Jim replies.

Henry8 and the guys in house #5 greet the Judge and engage him in rapid fire conversation, hoping this keeps him from noticing that their front door is missing. When the Judge shucks an ear of corn from the garden and sees the corn bores, he writes that down, shaking his head.

The Judge goes to house #2 and stares unbelievingly. What on earth is this domicile?
Sally and Penny rush up to him, smiling. "Our house blew away in a huge thunderstorn," Penny explains, "but this is what it used to look like!" she holds out a Polaroid picture of the triangular house that previously stood there.
"How'd you get a Polaroid picture of the house when you're supposed to be in 1643?" he thunders.
"Just lucky, I guess!" is all Penny can think to say.
He writes on the evaluation sheet, 'Cheaters,' and moves on.
WandaSue approaches Sally and Penny and sneers, "So much for your great idea, Penny! We can kiss the million goodbye!"

House #3, where the two married couples live, is given a cursory going-over, but, since it's in disrepair, the occupants don't hold out much hope.
"Well, we've had fun," Vinnie comments, "Who cares about da million dollars anyway?"
"Would have been nice, though," Marthy sighs, "It would have helped Jack and I buy a house of our own."
Jack puts his arm around her shoulders, "Don't you fret now, love, we'll have our own place before you know it. And now that I know how well you cook," laugher all round, "I can't wait!"

The skies become more ominous by the minute as the Judge instructs William to call together the villagers for his pronouncement.
After everyone (but Rev. Jim and the Doc) are assembled, the Judge clears his throat and says loudly, "After examining the five homesteads, there is a clear winner......." everyone pays rapt attention as he pauses for dramatic effect, "And the winner by quite a wide margin is.......house #1!
As he's in the process of handing the trophy to Marilyn, who has been chosen to be the official head of the house that month, crackling comes from the sky, which is almost black. Rain comes down in torrents, accompanied by loud thunder and bolts of lightning that startle everyone. The Judge runs for his car and barely makes it inside as a lightning bolt hits a mere two feet from it.


The Thunder Rolls, The Lightning Strikes........by Terri

"Run for cover! Run to your shelters!" William yells.
People are scurrying everywhere as the heavens open up and pour their deluge on the villagers. The women of house #1 hurry in, throwing the bolt. Sally, Penelope and WandaSue pound on their door.
"Let us in!" "Come on! We're gonna drown!" they yelled.
Celeste and Marilyn looked at each other. Marilyn sighed and threw open the bolt. The wind caught the door and flung it open. The three misfits crashed forward into the small house. Eleanor slammed it shut and threw the bolt again.
The three pain-in-the-butts stood there dripping wet. Bess hurried forward with some burlap and flour bags. Eleanor stood there and glared at them.
She said, "If it were up to me, I'd let you stay under that three-board shanty you call home sweet home but since I am outnumbered..."
Wanda Sue snapped, "You can afford to be hospitable now, you have the trophy and that million is as good as in the bank!"
Celeste looked out the window. "I don't like the looks of this. Not at all."
Another crack of lightning followed by a deep rumble of thunder. Celeste dropped the curtain down and jumped back.
Marilyn whispered, "I'm worried about the others. Henry and Luke have no door, the Paponettis and Jack and Marthy have a saggy roof. Maybe we should brave the storm and get them all into other accomodations?"
Bess said, "Where is that Moonie person?"
Sally dried off her face and then she made one. A face, that is. "Oh, she's so besotted with Reverend Philbrook. Claims she knew him in another life and their hearts are like two puzzle pieces that fit. Her destiny or some such crap!"
Celeste conferred with Marilyn and Eleanor. Bess was busy putting some water on to boil but the fire kept going out.
Marilyn said, "I am really worried about the others. Somehow we have to get them over here."
Celeste snapped her fingers. "I have an idea! I can zap myself into each house. That way no one will get wet."
Marilyn said "That's all fine and good. But how will you explain it to people like the Paponettis?"
Eleanor said, "I think Celeste is on to something. We can trust the Paponettis by now. I am sure they are aware things are a little peculiar when it comes to the Winding Willow populace."
Celeste took the coin, closed her eyes and whispered, "The number 3 house."
The air glowed and swirled. Suddenly Celeste was standing in the middle of the house of the two married couples. Jack and Marthy were sitting in a corner. Jack had his arms around Marthy and her head was buried in his chest. She was sobbing.
Vinnie and Sheila were looking just as miserable but being older they kept a stiff upper lift. Celeste had to give them credit for their dignity.
She yelled, "No time to waste! Let's join hands and get to shelter!"
Jack and Marthy jumped up, rain splashing their faces. Vinnie and Sheila hesitantly came over but bravely joined hands too. Celeste whispered "House #1" and they were standing in the middle of the room. Celeste looked at the Paponetti's faces. She shook her head. "No time to explain!"
She grabbed the coin again and whispered "House number 5!"
She was standing there next to William. The men were frantically trying to block the doorway with any furniture they had. Mike and Luke were trying to put a blanket in the way and hold it up with one of the beds. The wind blew and threw the blanket into their fireplace. "Come on! Let's go!" Celeste yelled.
The four men knew what she meant and grabbed her hands as she whisked them away to house #1.
Sally spat out, "WHAT?? More men? If I had a house to go to, I'd be out of here!"
Marilyn retorted, "If you had a house to go to, you'd be out on your ear!"
Celeste looked out the window again. She turned to everyone and said, "House #4 seems to be standing alright. I guess the rest of them will be OK."
No sooner had she said that when Thor hurled a thunderbolt the likes of what had never been seen before. Two big towering oak trees that stood on either side of house #4 were on fire.
Everyone in house #1 was dumbstruck. They watched as the fireballs of trees swayed back and forth before they dropped their mighty timbers right on the roof of house #4, caving it in.


THE RESCUE........by Coralynn

"My God! We've gotta get over there!" William yells.
Before anyone can think of a better plan, William, Jack, Vinnie, Luke, Mike, Moose, and Slim race out of the house toward house #4. Henry8 and Travis sit huddled in blankets, not joining the others.
Eleanor gives them a sharp stare.
"I can't move that fast!" Henry replies to her visual accusation.
"I sprained my wrist!" Travis whines.
The occupants of house #1 watch as the men reach house #4 and then see Rafe, Hots and Jerry emerge from the back and come around to where the other 8 men have grabbed buckets and are dipping them in the horse trough, which is now overflowing.
"Daniel is still in there!" Hots yells as he joins the bucket brigade.

Eleanor and Bess, watching from the window, exclaim, "He's out of there!" meaning Jerry for Eleanor and Slim for Bess.

The fire is extinguished partly by the buckets of water and partly by the rain, which is falling in torrents, then begins to diminish.
The storm begins to pass off to the east as the men are seen entering house #4 by kicking timbers out of the way with their feet. The wood is still smoldering, and smoke rises like steam from it.
"Daniel!" William calls out.
No response.
The men are so engaged in getting the timbers away from where they assume Daniel has been pinned under them that they don't notice that the fire has spread to house #3 and house #5, a parting shot from the storm.

The occupants of house #1 are glued to the scene as they finally see the men extricate Daniel from house #4. They carry him out and place him on the now soggy ground. "Think he's dead?" Bess asks the others.
"Wouldn't bother me if he was!" Marilyn says before she realizes how cold it sounds.
Before long the men reach house #1 and carry Daniel in, followed by the cameramen, Randy and Steve, who somehow have remained calm enough to get most of this disaster on film.
"Put him down on my bed," Eleanor suggests.
Daniel lies there, lifeless. William feels for a pulse and comments, "He's alive, but he must have sustained massive injuries! We need the Doc."
It's then that the others get a good look at the other men who survived house #4's ruin.
"Jerry!" Eleanor is aghast, "What happened to your hair? And......your eyebrows?"
Jerry runs his hand over the top of his head, "I think I caught fire for a time. No problem, it'll grow back."
Moose, sitting on the bench by the table, realizes his left arm doesn't operate properly. "I may have broken or sprained this arm," he mentions casually.
Marilyn rushes to him and begins to examine the arm, fear in her eyes.
By now William and Hots have run to the Doc's office and are seen returning with him. The Doc goes to where Daniel is lying and examines his condition. Everyone is silent until the Doc tells them, "He needs to be flown to a hospital. If we move him any other way, he may die."
"Moose's arm is broken!" Marilyn wants to be sure her friend isn't ignored in lieu of Daniel. The Doc then examines Moose and concludes, "You should have this checked out, too. Now if we could just think of a rapid way to get you two over to the nearest hospital....."
All eyes are on Celeste, who fingers the coin in her pocket. Taking a deep breath, she addresses the Doc. "Leave it to me!" she tells him as she goes to where Daniel is prone, touches him, touches the coin, and the two disappear.
"What on earth?!" the Doc is shocked. "What just happened here?"
The cameras continue to roll.
Celeste then reappears, touches Moose, and they disappear.
"Now just a minute!" The Doc exclaims.
When Celeste again returns, the Doc's eyes are round as saucers. He stares at her, questioningly.
"Don't look so shocked!" she tells him, "It's just a camera trick."
"HUH?!" is all the Doc can think to say.
Fortunately, at that moment, Rev. James Philbrook saunters in the house and sits on a bench, a toothpick sticking out of his mouth, and a lopsided grin lighting up his face, "That was some dream I just had!" he says, laughing.
"You sleep in the middle of the day?!" William is amazed.
"Sure! Don't you?!" Jim answers, then walks outside, sees the burned houses, walks back in and sits down again, "Funny thing: three of the houses are burned down. That was sure one powerful dream!"
Randy and Steve laugh as they film.

"Gather up whatever possessions you want. We're leaving!" Celeste tells everyone.
"But we have a month to go!" Rafe protests.
"Not in this place we don't!" Eleanor joins forces with Celeste, "Just grab what you want and let's ditch this popsycle stand!"

Celeste knows that it will be difficult for everyone in the house to understand why they should join hands, so she uses her most powerful magic. Touching the coin, she instructs it to take house #1 to the back yard of the big house on Winding Willow.

The house appears in the back yard with a thump, which knocks two of the walls out into the yard.
The Doc, Jim Philbrook, the Papponettis and the cameramen cannot believe their eyes. They look at Celeste for an explanation.
"Like I said before.....camera trick!" she tells them as the group exits what's left of the house.
Rose and John rush out in alarm. "What happened?" Rose asks Eleanor.
"You'll have a hard time believing this, but....." Eleanor begins to relate the adventures of the day to her as they walk toward the house and safety.

Daisy Moonbeam Freedom has heard the thunder outside, but is so determined to perfect a potion that will cause Rev. Jim to fall helplessly in love with her, that she has paid it no heed.
"I think that oughta do it!" she says aloud as she shakes the test tube. "Now, where is my true love? I'll put this in a glass of whiskey and before he knows it...."
She walks out of the parsonage, where she has been holed up for the last few weeks, and sees the smoldering houses.
"What?!" she exclaims, "My love may be trapped in one of those buildings.....I must save him!"
She races from house to house, but there is no sign of life. She goes to the Doc's house, as she has strongly suspected Jim has been using for a residence, and enters. It is eeerily quiet. She goes from room to room and finds nobody there.
"JIM??" she calls out.
She races back outside and yells his name over and over but all she hears is the storm which has moved several miles over to the east.
"Is anybody here?!" she yells out. By now any human voice would be welcome. There is no reply. She gets frantic...whatever has happened to everyone? Is this place like Brigadoon, which vanishes for a hunderd years at a time? Can't be....the village is still here, ruined, but here.
Though she's beginning to realize the futility of it, she continues to walks around the village calling out names, "Eleanor? Celeste? Henry? Anybody?"


AFTERMATH OF AN INFERNO......by Terri

Rose and John hurriedly got towels and blankets for their wet survivor friends. Everyone was talking at once. John looked worriedly around. "Daniel! Where's Daniel?"
No one answered. William cleared his throat. "Uh, John, there seems to have been an accident...."
Rose's head shot up. "He--he's not, he's not..."
William hastily said, "No. But we don't know how badly he is hurt. The roof timber support beam fell and he was pinned under it. Then the house caught on fire."
John grabbed his keys and said, "Where is he? WHERE IS MY BROTHER?"
William looked at Celeste and she said, "Westchester County Hospital."
Rose said, "I am going with you."
John had his hand on the doorknob and said, "No, honey. You stay here and tend to the others."
"But, John..what if the worst...I mean...you--you shouldn't be alone..." John kissed her hastily on the forehead and said, "I'll call you. As his brother and next of kin, they will need me for..whatever."
Marilyn said, "I'm going too. Moose is there with a fractured arm. May I ride with you, John?"
He said, "If you can go now."
With that they went out the door.

Rose called Roger to come over and help assess the injuries the villagers sustained. She went back and forth with towels, blankets, hot water and antiseptic. Bethia came over and burst into tears when she saw the scrapes and the twigs and leaves sticking out of the various garments of the colonists. Rose said, "Beth, help me. Make some coffee and lace it heavily with brandy."
William mopped his face with a towel and marveled at the efficient young women who were so helpless only three years earlier. Was it really only that long ago? So many changes...both married and mothers.
Celeste came over to William and clasped his hand. He reached up and hugged her neck. No one spoke. No one knew what to say. They had all known of their affection but no one knew the depth of it.
William coughed. "*ahem* Yes. Well. I suppose someone should call Marty Henshaw and explain to him what transpired and that the project is abandoned. And as Governor, I suppose it should be me."
Rose jumped up and said very determinedly, "NO! I will! And I will read him the riot act for this ill-gotten and half-assed notion of his. He had no business--NO BUSINESS!--putting all of you in harm's way. All because of ratings! He had the most disastrous notions! I can't begin to tell you...."
William cut her off. "You are too emotional, my dear. It is not good for the wee bairn you are carrying. Just relax."
"But--but----Daniel may be--may be---MY POOR JOHN!"
Celeste patted her arm. "Nonsense. Daniel was unconscious which was a blessing for him."
Bess whispered to Marthy, "Why is Rose getting so worked up about Daniel?"
Marthy whispered, "Wretch that he is, he and Rose kind of shared alot. And after all, he IS her brother-in-law. Kind of a reckless John I guess. She's protective of her own. She always has been. And she's not in love with Daniel. She loves John. But..." Marthy shrugged.
Roger gave everyone tetanus shots. "You all should be good for the next ten years. Slim? That cut on your hand--I need you to go to the hospital and get it X-rayed for splintered metal. I flushed it out but it needs more than I can do here. Jerry?"
And with that Roger burst out laughing. "I'm sorry, pal! You look--weird!"
Eleanor rushed to his defense. "It's not his fault! That place was a fireball! His hair got singed and his eyebrows....GONE!"
Jerry looked in the mirror and shook his head. "I hope it grows back. I don't want to have a face like a newborn baby or have to pencil my eyebrows in like Joan Crawford!"
Roger looked at the rest and said, "What I prescribe for all of you are hot showers and a good night's sleep. Any one of you allergic to penicillin?"
No one raised their hands.
"Good." Roger said. "I am leaving prescriptions for each of you and I will have them filled and delivered here by the pharmacy. Also some pain pills. But aspirin will work for most of what ails you."
Celeste said, "Between Rog and Beth, Henry's castle and our place, there is room for all of you to stay. I think what we have had is a bonding experience and I don't think we should leave this way."
Rafe said, "Besides, I'm going to stay right here until John calls about Daniel. I know he is a scoundrel, but he WAS my room-mate and we did have good times."
Wanda Sue was standing in the background. "Hey, Doc! Look at this poison ivy!"
Roger gave it a cursory glance and said, "Poison ivy is down on my list, kiddo. Use aloe or calamine lotion and remember: 'leaflets three, let it be'. "
Wanda Sue snarled, "Yeah, yeah. I intend to get no closer to vegetation than the local supermarket produce section."
Rose sat down and her eyes filled with tears. Roger beckoned her into the next room. He put his hands on her shoulders. "Rose, you need to calm down. I know you have been having cramps.."
"SHH! I don't want anyone to know!"
"Well, you remember what happened when you were expecting Julie. Next time you may not be so fortunate. Now take it easy and calm down."
Rose nodded. In a small voice, she said, "Roger? Is--is the medical center good?"
Roger said, "The best we have. He's in good hands."
Rose twisted the towel she was holding. "I don't want anyone to get the wrong idea about Daniel and me. He--he's my brother-in-law....and despite what has happened to us...I don't wish any harm to come to him..I mean, we shared so much...and there was a question of...I mean.."
Roger gave her a sympathetic smile and said, "Tell you what. I will go right down to the hospital and find out for myself. I promise you---I will call you in a half hour even if I don't find out anything. But I promise you I will. I have connections."
Rose tried to give him a smile but failed. "Thank you, Roger. Please. Be there for John."


BLAME IT ON CAMERA TRICKS!.....by Coralynn

William punches in Marty Henshaw's phone number and gets Marty on the third ring.
"Marty! Guess what? The 1643 House wrapped a month early..............now, now, calm down and listen to the reason why! First off, the Judge came and awarded tropies to the best house for August. Yes, that Judge. Of course the women of house #1 won again which was no surprise. You wondered if the women would be at a disadvantage, but when you're dealing with Eleanor, Marilyn, Bess & Celeste, there is no such thing as a disadvatage.......(laugh heartily).......right..........now wait up, I'll get to what happened in a minute, Marty, keep your shirt on!..........seems the sky was cooking up another storm as the Judge was announcing the winner...........right.........but this one was right over the village and lightning bolts came down and barely missed the Judge. He made it into his car and roared off............but the rest of the villagers were not as fortunate. Lightning hit trees near house #4 and a large fiery tree fell right down on it........right........it smashed it like it was made of matchsticks, which is almost was, to be perfectly honest.........then the wind blew the fire to another two houses and they burned down as well...................right, three houses gone up in smoke.............yes, someone was hurt..............Daniel was pinned under a large beam....fell right on him........Jerry's hair was singed off and Moose's arm was broken.........and several others had minor injuries.......No, how could they sue? Who would they sue? God?........yes, this was all caught on film.......................now, Marty, I know this makes for a more exciting show than any of us anticipated, but......................no, no, we aren't still there, we're at the big house on Winding WIllow..............never mind how............yes, it would be a good move for you to visit them........Westchester County Hospital.............right.........OK, keep in touch. Sorry to have to give you the bad news.................you say you think it'll make the show even better, and it will, but...............yeah, we're licking our wounds, both literally and figuratively.............catch ya later, bye!"
William hangs up the phone and tells Celeste and Eleanor, who have been listening raptly to his end of the conversation, "Marty thinks of the bottom line...the ratings...but I thought he would be more upset over the injured participants. Once he realized he probably wouldn't be sued, he was all excited about the high ratings the show would get. I can see the promos for it now: 'The villagers are doomed...watch and see!!'"

"Someone call out for pizza!" William tells the group, "Eleanor! Can you do that? And have them send over a variety of soft drinks."
He looks around at the good sized group of people, none of whom seem eager to leave the premsis. He's surprised to see Steve and Randy still filming and walks over to them.
"I say there, gents, why are you still filming?"
Steve turns off his camera and replies, "These shows always feature the aftermath, you know, after the people get home. That's what we're getting on film now."
"You realize that many of these people are still in a state of shock, do you not?"
"Welllll, yeah, but that makes it more realistic. By the way, we saw a few odd things, like the people from several houses suddenly appearing in house #1, then.....and this was wierd, the house seemed to fling all of us into the back yard of your place here. How we going to explain that?!"
William gets a super serious expession on his face and answers with great emphasis on each word, "You are to say that all the odd things were camera tricks."
"Hey, I don't think so......."
William repeats his last statement, putting more spacing between the words.
"OK, so I'll try. I'll tell Marty to have the commentator say that, but nobody's going to buy it!"
"They'll have no choice!" William concludes the conversation and joins Henry8, Luke, Slim and Mike, who are busily talking among themselves.
"I want to be sure we're all on the same page...." he begins. The four men stop their chatting and wait for his next idea. "We cannot let anyone think that what happened tonight involved magic, so when asked, you are to say that it was all camera tricks."
It takes a moment for them to digest this idea, then they nod silently.
William moves on to Rafe, Hots and Jerry, and repeats the same instruction to them.
"Even when we all landed, splat! in the back yard?" Hots is incredulous.
"Right, even when we all landed splat! in the back yard! Camera tricks, pure and simple." William reiterates.
He dreads trying to pull the wool over the eyes of Vinnie and Sheila yet again, but plunges into it regardless. "I say Vinnie! Sheila! Did you notice what clever camera tricks those guy pulled to get us back to the big house here?"
"Camera tricks?" Vinnie asks, tipping his head skeptically.
"Absolutely! These guys are the best!" William smiles almost too broadly.
Vinnie's shoulders shrug as he says, "Who knew?!"
"Right! Who knew?!" William laughs and moves on, relieved.
William sees the women of house #2, notorious house #2, and wonders what to tell them. Sally Jennings knows about time travel, after all, they brought her here from sometime in the 1700s, and WandaSue was sent back to the Salem Witch Trials so God knows she's aware of it, but Penelope Patterson? He scratches his chin. What do I tell someone like her?
He approaches the three women and smiles, "Some camera trick, aye ladies? Imagine that, we landed in the back yard."
"Right! In a pig's eye!" WandaSue scoffs.
"You must be daft!" Sally adds.
Penelope has no idea what the deal is and simply asks, "Anybody seen Daisy lately?"
They glance around the room and LO and behold, no Daisy.
"Well, well, it looks like we left her behind!" WandaSue says happily.
William frowns. What am I supposed to do about that, he wonders, then moves on to join Celeste, Eleanor, Bess and Marilyn.
He keeps his voice low and soft, "We seem to be missing a villager. Remember Daisy, the plant talker? The wacko psychic who stalked our minister? I don't think she made it back with the rest of us."
Celeste busts out laughing, "And we're supposed to care?!"
"That's cold, Celeste. Very cold. I'm disappointed in your reaction....."
"Stuff a sock in it, kid!" Celeste grins, "She's probably still sitting on that tree stump waiting for James Philbrook to come back to her!"
"Where is he anyway?" Marilyn asks, glancing around the room.
They finally locate him, propped up on floor pillows, singing "The Age of Aquarius."


PIZZA!.....by Terri

Within a half hour, Pizzas R Us was at the door with twenty pizzas of various toppings and a couple cases of a variety of Coke, Pepsi, Dr. Peppers and Sprites. One of the camera men volunteered to run to the liquor store and pick up beer.
Celeste and Eleanor set the pizzas down on the table and got out paper plates. Celeste called out, "Help yourselves."
Everyone lined up and from the ranks was heard--
"I never thought I would see this stuff again!"
"Ambrosia from the gods!"
"Hey, where's the one with extra cheese?"
And from Travis McGee, who hobbled on crutches, came, "I don't like pepperoni."
Hotspur slapped him upside the head. "Then pick the damn things off, dork!"
Travis grumbled and said something about calling his mother. Hots shook his head and walked off.

Travis looked around the room. I'll just bet John Gwinnett had a profitable time selling his drugs while I was not here to watch. That living room set looks new...I'll have to keep my eyes and ears open to see if I can find anything on it.

Rose sat there at the table trying to eat something. Little Will was sitting on Poppy William's lap. "Poppy, you ARE going to shave that beard, aren't you? You kind of look like Santa Claus. And it's scratchy too."
William roared with laughter. "Yes, Will, I am shaving it off. Tomorrow. When I am not so tired and can see straight!"
Little Julie toddled over to William and he scooped her up. She tentatively touched his beard and then let out a cry. Rose came over and picked her up. Julie buried her face in Rose's shoulder and sneaked peeks at William. Whenever he caught her eye, Julie let out with a fresh round of tears.
Rose made comforting sounds to her and William sat there wondering what he had done wrong.
Rose explained, "I guess she has never seen a beard before, William. You aren't her familiar 'Poppy' right now. And she's freaked out."
William was mollified. "Allright, just as long as she hasn't forgotten me."
Celeste said, "Children don't forget things, William. Although you may SMELL a little different."
Jerry held out his hands. "I'll take her, Rose."
Julie started to go to her 'Uncle' Jerry but then looked twice at his face. Above his eyebrows it was as bare as a baby's bottom. His hair was frizzed on top. Julie shrank back and REALLY howled.
"I'd better keep her with me." Rose said. She sat down with the baby, rocking and soothing her.
Travis stood there watching. She doesn't ACT like a woman who is a streetwalker. Or the wife of a drug lord. But hey, appearances are deceiving. And she has ME to thank for that baby she is carrying. Travis puffed his chest out like he was the one who had done the deed!

Wanda Sue sat in the corner shoveling pizza in her face. No one seemed willing to go over and talk to her. But Wanda Sue didn't mind. This is A-1 prime chow. I was getting tired of those Hungry Man dinners anyways. I need to write to them and demand they make some different kinds of meat. She peeled a scab off and continued to eat her pizza and wash it down with Bud Lite.

There was a general feeling of camaraderie in the ranks. They had gone through so much together, even if they didn't all like each other. Finally Eleanor said to William, "Think we should send someone to pick up Daisy the Loon?" William sighed. He said, "Yes. If we have to tolerate the presence of that Wanda Sue creature and Travis McGee, I suppose we shan't leave Miss Daisy out there."
Bess said, "Think she will take her new best friends home with her?" Everyone looked questioningly at the other. Friends?
Marthy looked at Bess, snapped her fingers and said, "The PLANTS!"
Bess grinned, pointed her finger at Marthy and said, "BINGO!"
Marthy groaned. "Oh, great! I am thinking like Bess now!"
Jack hugged her and said, "Don't worry, sweetheart. It is momentary. Like that green flash seen before the sun goes down in Florida. It's quick, it's temporary, it happens."

William heaved himself out of the chair, reached for the phone and sighed. "One helicopter coming up. Charged to the account of Mr. Martin Henshaw."


APPLYING FOR [POLITICAL?] ASYLUM..............by Coralynn

Steve, camera slung over his shoulder, approaches Williiam. "I have to go on that chopper!" he says, excitedly.
"You do, why?"
"Because! This rescue has to be shown on the follow-up! I mean, how exciting is it when a participant is left behind to fend for herself, then is rescued?"
"You have a point, but......you'd better hurry." William gives Steve the location of the chopper. Steve has barely written it down before he bolts for the front door, hops in his car and races away.
Jim Philbrook has by now abandoned his resting place on the floor. He hears the interchange between William & Steve, then, tugging on William's sleeve, asks,"Uhhhhhhh, you're going to bring that crazy woman here?"
"Well, yes, I suppose so."
"I can't be here when she gets here! Hide me, please! please!"
William grins, "Afraid of her, Reverend?"
"For sure! She's a maniac. She thinks we're soulmates! If I had a soulmate, which I doubt, considering what a bummer that would be for any woman, it sure wouldn't be her!!"
"Well, I suppose we could hide you in Henry8's castle next door"......William thinks aloud.
"There's a castle next door?" Jim screws up his face in confusion.
"Oh yes. It has a dungeon, too."
"Far out!" Jim's eyes sparkle.
William walks to where Henry8 is standing, shoving pizza into his mouth as fast as humanly possible, and asks, "Henry, can you stop eating long enough to do the Reverend here a big favor?"
"Mgehhhhhh!" comes from Henry's over-full mouth.
"Swallow, for the love of God, Henry! Good, that's better. Now, please take James Philbrook to your castle and hide him."
"Is he wanted by the Police?" Henry is suspicious.
"No, Henry, he's wanted by that crazy woman, Daisy, the one we've sent a helicopter to rescue."
"Oh yeah? Wellllll....." Henry reaches for another piece of pizza, but is restrained by William yanking him away by the arm.
"NOW!" he says firmly.
"Oh, OK, but I'm taking the pizza with me!" Henry closes the lid of that particular pizza box and shoves it under his arm.
William shakes his head. Some things never change! A glutton is a glutton no matter which century he is currently occupying.
Jim is now standing beside William with a terrified look on his face. "Please hide me, Henry the Eighth! Hey! There was a king named that. You aren't by any chance a friend of his are you?"
Henry exchanges 'who is this crazy guy' looks with William and answers, "Hey, buddy, I can only be gone for five minutes, so let's go!" grabs Jim by the arm and the two go out the back door off the kitchen.
Since that door leads to the deck, a fact of which Jim is unaware, he walks briskly outside and falls down the steps leading into the back yard.
He lies there a minute, opens his eyes and asks Henry, "Are we there yet?"
"Not quite!" Henry continues walking toward the castle, Jim trotting along behind him rubbing his head. "That first step is a killer!" he repeats over and over.
When they arrive at the castle, it is dark inside. Henry8 uses his castle-key and the large wooden door swings open with a loud creak.
"Ooooo, this is spooky! This isn't by any chance a Halloween spook house, is it? My Mom took me to one when I was a little kid and it scared the bejeebers out of me! Say this isn't one of those....."
"This isn't one of those," Henry repeats as he turns on the lights.
Jim is overwhelmed by the opulence and scope of the room he sees. "Wow! Look at this! How'd you get a place like this anyhow, Hen?!"
"Long story."
"Jeeeeeez, I'll bet!" Jim walks around the room looking up at the medieval chandelier hanging down, the huge fireplace, and the walls made of huge, polished stone.
"You can stay in here!" Henry leads Jim to one of the empty bedrooms.
Jim is amazed, "This room is incredible! Can I move in with you? Please?"
"I'm hiding you, not 'moving you in,'" Henry tells him, annoyance begining to show in his vocal tone.
"Thanks a million!" Jim call out as Henry leaves the room and pulls the door shut behind him.


________________.......by Terri

Rosamond rocked Julie to sleep. Which was surprising because of all the noise that was around her. William eased himself back into his Barcalounger and flipped the lever. He leaned back and closed his eyes. Celeste put her feet up and cuddled little Will. Rose asked, " 'Mom', how badly was Daniel hurt?"
Celeste said, "I couldn't really tell. He was unconscious and didn't even moan. We thought he was dead to begin with. Faint pulse. His face was white and his skin was clammy. Of course, that could be from him lying there with the rain pouring in on him."
William, his eyes still shut, said, "Yeah. Good thing his mouth wasn't open like it usually is, or else he would have drowned."
Rose said, "That's a terrible thing to say, William."
William opened one eye and said, "You didn't hear the stuff that came out of his mouth before I had to put him in the stocks for profanity."
Rose said, "I've heard similar. When John was recovering from his gunshot wound, all I heard was *&^% and $%^&!"
William exclaimed, "ROSE! I am SHOCKED!"
Rose said, "Welcome to the 21st century and cable TV, William. I was just as shocked as you were."
William said, "That's a relief to know you still have some standards, Rose, my dear."
Rose said, "Yes. I didn't know &^%$% could be a noun, verb AND adjective!"

Rose sat there fidgeting. "I should be down at the hospital with John. He needs me."
Celeste said, "No, my dear. Your children need you right now. Don't forget, Julie hasn't seen us in three months. To a toddler, that is a lifetime. Now, tell me what has been going on in the neighborhood since we have been gone."
Celeste was trying to get Rose's mind off Daniel and John.
Rose furrowed her brow. "Let's see....Grand Union on State Road is remodeling, it's going to be a super-store. We need one. The bistro on Main Street added a new club sandwich to their menu...."
Celeste interrupted her with, "No, dear, what is going on with PEOPLE! Please! I need some good old-fashioned gossip!"
"OH! Well, let's see...no gossip about the snooty Bidwells!" Rose grinned and Bethia stuck her tongue out at her and laughed.
Beth said, "Grace hasn't had a drop of liquor in three months. She is seeing the director of the AA in town on a social basis."
Rose continued, "I only saw Billy Bob when I picked up the kids from Juanita. She had Will out there riding, John said it was OK as long as BB was not home. But turns out he was coming in as I was leaving. We just exchanged pleasantries. I saw him glance in the back seat of my car..probably still looking for that jacket!"
Beth said, "Mrs. Crocker down the street won the bridge tournament."
Rose said, "Our house should be ready by next week so we will be out of your hair."
William said from his chair, "That saddens me. It makes me want to set the place on fire so you will stay with us forever!"
Rose continued. "Oh! And I found this out yesterday. Old Mr. Livingston next door died. Stroke. Took him right out, Amelia Douglas told me. I saw her outside when I was walking Julie and the dogs."
Celeste said, "I'm not surprised. He never was quite the same, Amelia said. Not since his wife died."
Beth added, "Amelia said they are having an estate sale as soon as they can locate the heirs. I heard he had a couple nieces or nephews. She said the lawyers for the estate are working on it now. Reading of the will and that stuff."
Rose said, "Can you imagine getting a letter saying,"----and this Rose intoned in a deep sonorous voice,---"we are gathered together for the reading of the last will and testament of Jame D. Livingston!" William said, "That house is run down. I mean, it's old and needs a lot of work."
Rose said, "Yes, like that Cooper house that we bought. I'll be Mr. Livingston hasn't changed a thing since Mrs. Livingston died. When DID she die, Beth?"
Beth said, "Amelia said she died in 1964."
Rose shivered, "And I'll bet the cobwebs are as old as that! The drapes were always drawn. And the grocery boy always delivered a box and left it on the back porch."
Beth said, "I'll bet he was as white as if he had leprosy! May be one of those people who could never see the sun. Like Dracula!"
Rose said, "Beth, you don't know what you are talking about! When I lived in Henry's Court, he always tried to scare me with tales of a creature that would bite your neck and drink your blood. It was his way of keeping me inside the castle walls. I got to tell you, that night I ran away to my parents house? That was all I could think about! Vampires and getting away from Henry. Which was not too far off from each other."
Beth said, "Anyway, getting back to Mr. Livingston, I know that Jerry's real estate office has been champing at the bit to get that contract. It will probably say, 'Charming fixer-upper'. And----William? You have a crazed look in your eyes!"
Celeste sighed. "He gets that way before he gets a notion." She spoke up. "And what notion are you getting, William?"
William didn't say a word but got off his Barcalounger. He drew the curtain back and started muttering, "..if I knock out this wall here and expand our house here...and then knock down the Livingston house and plant rutabagas and corn..and then there is the rose garden section..."
Rose, Celeste and Beth looked at each other. Beth said, "He's not thinking of buying it, is he?"
Celeste said, "I'm beginning to think so..."
Rose came up with, "OH NO! NOT ANOTHER ROSE GARDEN! William? YOU AREN'T PLANNING ON MORE ROSES, ARE YOU?"
William turned around and said, "Of course not, Rose. I'm going to use it for a family cemetery for the next person that DESTROYS MY ROSE BUSHES AGAIN!"


LEFT BEHIND: Chapter 2.......by Coralynn

Daisy wanders around the village at The 1643 House, but no longer calling out names, as it has become painfully clear that the place is deserted by everyone but her.
"I could start walking," she says aloud, "They couldn't have gotten far!"
She walks to where house #1 used to stand and wonders where it went. Strange, very strange. But their garden is still there, the corn ready to pick.
She gathers up several burlap bags and proceeds to pick the ears of corn, shoving them into the bags. She then examines their tomatoes, which also look ready for harvesting. They sure have one hell of a great garden! she thinks as she also picks them and puts them into their own burlap bag.
The bags are heavy, but somehow she manages to drag them along with her as she finds the path that leads in the direction of the place they were first let out of the bus months ago.
After hiking along for about twenty minutes, she becomes weary and sits down on a large rock protruding from the ground. Her ankles are beginning to swell and fruit flies are thick in the air. She tries to bat them away, but there are too many of them.
"This has to be a trick! Penny and Sally must be behind this!" she announces to the fruit flies, "Just you wait! I'll get back at them! They'll rue the day they messed with Daisy Moonbeam Freedom!"
The flies have no reply, of course. The only sound on that hot summer afternoon is the call of mourning doves and the whirr of a helicopeter. It takes her a few minutes to realize that the latter sound is not typical and when she lifts her eyes to the sky, sees a chopper hovering overhead.
Standing up again, she waves her arms frantically to get the attention of whoever is in the chopper. It moves off toward the village, however, away from her.
"Gotta get back!" she says to the air, and, taking hold of the burlap bags full of produce, walks slowly and laboriously toward the village. "Wait up!" she yells over and over again.


DANIEL'S DIAGNOSIS......by Terri

"What is taking them so long, Roger?" John paced back and forth in the waiting room. Roger came back from conferring with another doctor.
"They have to do all sorts of tests on Daniel to see what sort of injuries he sustained. So far they have come up with is two broken legs. But there may be internal injuries. They won't know until they do some blood work. He's definitely in shock and they are dealing with that. Trying to keep his blood pressure from falling."
"Why can't I see him?" John said anxiously.
"Because you will just be in the way. He's slipping in and out of consciousness. Please, John. I know it is hard but be patient. Doctor Barber is in there and he is the best neurologist there is."
"Neurologist? You think Daniel is comatose?"
"No, but we want to make sure he regains consciousness quickly. He sustained injuries not only from the trees but also the roof caving in. Why don't we go down for coffee? Dr. Barber will page us."
John shook his head. "No. I have to be here. Think I should call Rhys and Megaera?"
Roger shook his head no. "Not unless you feel you need their support."
John took a deep breath. "No. I don't want to worry them. Even though they are our parents, they are kind of like strangers to us. I mean, this Megaera is quite unlike the Julia Gwinnett we grew up with."
Roger patted his shoulder. "I understand."
"Roger? Thanks for being here. I didn't realize how much I would need anyone. Rose would freak out under these....ROSE! I need to call her! She was upset and I kind of ran out on her."
Roger said, "I promised I would call her. Do you want me to?"
John said, "No, I'll do it. I---I need to hear her voice. Just---just because I need to."
John walked over to the phone on the wall of the waiting room. He dialed and Bess answered the phone.
"Hello?"
"Hey, Bess. Is Rose able to come to the phone?"
"Sure. She's been on pins and needles...HEY ROSE! JOHN IS ON THE PHONE FOR YOU!"
John held the phone far away and turned to Roger and said, "Bess will never be the shy retiring type, will she?"
Roger shook his head and said, "Once an innkeeper's daughter, always an innkeepers' daughter."
Rose hurried over to the phone and said, "John! I've been waiting! And Roger didn't call when he said he would."
"I know, sweetheart, but there isn't much to tell. The doctors know he has two broken legs and is in shock. They are working on him."
Rose said quietly, "John, does it look bad for him?"
"I don't know yet. I'll be here for a while, that's for sure."
Rose started sniffling. "As much as I have hated Daniel, I didn't wish for this to happen to him. Honest, John!"
John said, "I know that, honey. I just wanted to check in with you and keep you posted. Roger is going to be with me for a while. You get some sleep and I'll call you in the morning if I am not back by then."
"Ok, John. I love you."
"Love you too, honey. Kiss the kids for me."
CLICK!


LEFT BEHIND, part 3..........by Coralynn

Daisy Moonbeam Freedom is staggering under the load she's carrying as she finally reaches the village again. The chopper has managed to land in the village square, the two men piloting the craft looking around for the person they've been sent to rescue.
"HELP!" she yells out. The men hear this and turn toward the souce of the sound. They see a rumpled, middle-aged woman carrying three burlap bags, soaked in sweat, her hair a mass of tangles.
"There she is," pilot #1 says to pilot #2, "not the prettiest sight you ever saw, aye?"
"The thought of putting her in the chopper is not one I relish!" the other replies, wincing.
Daisy manages to haul herself and her burlap bags to the chopper. "OK, you guys, where are the other people?"
"They're back in Chappaqua," pilot #2 answers, "Why didn't you go with them when they left?"
"Because.........because they didn't tell me they were going!" she tells them bitterly.
"A fine woman like you, hmmmmm, why would they ever leave without you?" pilot #1 almost laughs out loud.
"Are you going to help me into the helicopter or not?!" she demands.
"Maybe you, but not those burlap bags you're carrying!"
"They're going with me."
"No, they're not."
"They either go with me or I refuse to leave!" she yells at the pilots.
"What's in them, anyway?" pilot #1 is curious.
"Food! From the garden! You don't just walk away and leave the stuff to rot out in the sun!" Daisy is getting more annoyed by the minute. Sheeeeesh, these guys are numb-skulls!
The two pilots look at each other, then shrug and load the burlap bags into the chopper.
"If we crash because of too much weight, it's on your head!" pilot #2 warns Daisy.
"I'll have you know I lost 10 pounds on the South Beach diet!" she shoots back before she realizes just what weight he's referring to.
"Hop in!" they both tell her, and, after struggling to get aboard, she plops down in a passenger seat and heaves a mighty sigh. "You guys going to take me to where the others are? I've a good mind to sue that William person! How dare he go off, take everyone, and leave me behind?"
"How indeed?" pilot #1 grins at pilot #2 as they lift off the ground and turn south, the blades making an earl-splitting sound as they head for their destination.

It's then that Daisy realizes there is someone else aboard. Turning, she gazes straight into the lens of Steve's camera.
"Get that thing out of my face!" she demands.
"I'm doing a follow-up," he informs her calmly, "and you are an important part of that."
"Important? Who, me?"
"Right."
"Because I'm a world renowned psyhic?"
"Noooo."
"Because I knew who killed Tori Sheffield long before the police did?"
"No again."
"Because my true love is awaiting me back in town?"
"Your true love...?"
"Right! James Philpot, I mean Philbrook. You see, we first met many years ago at Woodstock......"
By the time they land at the big house on Winding Willow, she has regaled Steve with her tale of star crossed lovers reunited by fate.
As soon as the chopper blades have ceased whirling, he hops out of the chopper and runs as fast as he can for the house, thinking, "This woman is nuts! Certifyably insane!"

Everyone at the 'villagers' gathering at the big house hears the chopper set down in the back yard and many go outside to see what it's all about.
William whispers to Marilyn, "OK, here she comes. Now, remember, we aren't to give away James Philbrook's whereabouts!"
"My lips are sealed!" Marilyn puts on a mock seriousness.
Unfortunately, the four people in the chopper have to walk past the remains of house #1, which are splattered all over the back yard. "What's all this?!" pilot #2 asks as they reach the house.
Marilyn grins at William, "You going to pass that off as a camera trick, too?"
"Rats! We should have cleaned up that mess. Well, I'll think of something!" he walks to where the recent arrivals are standing on the back deck.
"Sorry about the mess, people. We were going to build a storage shed, but it has been neglected since we left for The 1643 House."
Daisy glares at the ruins of the house, "What do you mean? It is the 1643 House! It's House #1, I'd recognize it anywhere!"
"No no no," William shakes his head, then, hoping that changing the subject will keep her from insisting that it's house #1, he tells her with as much cheer as he can muster up, "Daisy! How glad we are to have you back! I must apologize for the unfortunate event that left you in the village. You must have been devastated."
"Not as devastated as you're going to be William! You were the Governor, and you left me behind. On purpose, I might add!"
Randy and Steve both have their cameras rolling, thinking, "this is terrific aftermath!"
"It was an oversight, pure and simple," he reassures her, putting on his most beatific smile.
"I'm going to sue you so that you spend the rest of your life paying me off is what I'M going to do!" Daisy shrills, "And so will Jim, my true love. He must be beside himself with worry........where is he, anyway?" she looks around the room.
Eleanor takes over, "He had to go home, Daisy."
"Well, where's 'home'?" the other woman asks.
"I'm not all that sure! He called for a cab and left and didn't tell us where," Eleanor lies.
Daisy sits down heavily on a couch and shoves the bags of produce across the floor with her outstretched feet. "There! Have a corn roast! You'll be glad to get free food when I'm done suing!"

MEANWHILE:

Rev. James Philbrook is finishing up a huge bowl of fruit cocktail, smacking his lips, "This stuff is Aces!" he says to the empty room.
He looks around for someone to talk to. Henry8 is back at the party next door; the party he, Jim, does not dare return to because of Daisy, who, he is pretty sure, is now there. He heard the chopper and when he opened a side window heard her voice yelling something at William.
He stands and tells himself, "I must go home now. I must go to.............uhhhhhhh, where do I live now? OH, I know, Pleasantville! Yeah, that town! OK, so I live in a little shed on an estate. Ha! Beggers can't be choosers! How will I get there? Do I have a car here? Uhhhhhhhhhhh, no. Let's see, how else can I get there.......uhhhhhh......I know, a bus! But I don't know when the busses run. How about a cab? yeah.......a cab. How do I find a phone number for a cab?...............ohhh yeah, the yellow pages." he somehow manages to find the CAB listing in the yellow pages and dials up the AAAAAA Cab Company.


DOUBLE DOSE OF MAALOX & MARY ELLEN.......by Terri

"J.R., do you have the airline tickets?"
"Yes, Mary Ellen, they are in my jacket pocket. Don't fret so much. Do you have the passports for second IDs?"
"Yes, in my purse. It's a better picture of me than my driver's license."
J.R. looked out the window. "Donna is here to take us to the airport."
Mary Ellen Montgomery took one last look around at the house. "Let's see, have I forgotten anything?"
Senator Montgomery said, "No, and if you did, you can always buy it in Chappaqua."

On the plane, Mary Ellen turned to the senator. "I certainly hope our son got our rooms ready."
J.R. Montgomery leaned back and closed his eyes. "I am sure he did, dear. He's not a moron. And he has Juanita there to help. Now why don't you shut your eyes and try to take a nap? We got up early this morning."
Mary Ellen said, "I just hope he got rid of every trace of that little trollop he was married to."
J.R. looked out the plane window and said, "Which one?"
Mary Ellen snapped, "You know perfectly well which one! The one who entrapped him!"
"Oh. THAT one! I rather liked Rosamond. Kind of like a breath of English air!"
Mary Ellen huffed. What do men know anyway?

Mary Ellen Montgomery leaned back as far as her first class seat would go. She began to play over in her mind the day she received the letter from the firm of Whitehouse, Grimley and Chase. The letter said that Grandfather Livingston had died a week before. He wanted no mourners and Edward Grimley was in charge of arrangements. No funeral. From what I remember, he had a country estate and that huge house he and Grandmother moved into in Westchester county. I knew he had stocks and bonds and was richer than dirt.
Mary Ellen sighed. I am the sole survivor. Only grandchild left. Which is true because he only had two and James fell off the face of the earth. No one has heard from him in years. James P. Livingston. Went off to find himself in the Summer of Love.
Mary Ellen smiled to herself satisfactorily. All I have to do is publish one of those 'looking for the whereabouts' in the newspaper. One of the obscure ones that no one reads. I am sure James OD'd by now. She rummaged in her purse and drew out the letter. The reading of the will is set for tomorrow morning. And with me the sole grandchild and Donna and William Robert the only heirs. And I am sure Grandfather Livingston doesn't even remember they existed!

The plane landed. Mary Ellen turned to the Senator and said, "Did you call William Robert and tell him when we were arriving?" J.R. said, "Yes, I called him from the plane when you were in the facilities. He'll meet our plane. Now here's your carry-on luggage. Let's go."

Billy Bob stood at the gate as he watched the Houston-to-New York plane taxi down the runway. His heart dropped to his stomach. My parents. Enough to make Freud head for the couch. He grabbed his bottle of Maalox and took a hefty swig.

Mary Ellen and J. R. Montgomery came down the ramp and into the airport. Billy Bob stood there waiting. J. R. shouted, "Hey, son! Over here! Over here!" Mary Ellen broke out in a smile for the apple of her eye and waved.
Billy Bob inwardly groaned and said a quick prayer. 'Get me off this planet.'

J.R. and Mary Ellen walked over to where BB was standing. J.R. embraced him heartily and Mary Ellen offered her cheek to him.
Mary Ellen stood back and looked at Billy Bob. "You've lost weight, dear. Not eating right, are you?"
Billy Bob sighed, "Yes, I am, Mother. I've just been working hard. The horses take up a lot of my time and we are bringing in new stock. They need to be trained, groomed, assimilated, assessed.."
Mary Ellen cut him off with a wave of her hand. "I certainly hope you aren't pining over that little tramp.."
J. R. cut her off with, "That will be enough, Mary Ellen! Leave the boy alone!"
Billy Bob turned away from his parents, quickly reached into his jacket pocket and took another healthy swig of Maalox.


SO THAT'S MY LAST NAME!..........by Coralynn

James Philbrook awakens on the couch. Wondering how he got there, he stands and looks around the one room shed he rents.
"Oh yeah, that party. Whew, I just made it out of there in time! Daisy would have found me at Henry8's castle, I know she would have. She has the nose of a bloodhound."
He sees a large stack of mail on the floor by the couch. "Did I bring in the mail last night?" he ponders. "Guess so!"
He decides to get a cup of coffee before tackling the mail. Walking to one side of the room, he opens a cupboard and rummages around looking for his jar of instant Yuban. It's way in the back, so he moves the other items out of the cupboard and places them on his small table. "There you are!" he says happily as he opens the jar and ladles out two heaping tablespoons of coffee into a cup.
He sees his teakettle sitting on his two-burner hotplate. "Nawww, takes too much time!" He turns on the water tap and, when the water is hot, fills the cup with it and stirs.
Returning to the couch, he takes a swallow of the coffee and reaches down for the mail. He sees a lot of ads, which he tosses across the room toward the waste basket, some falling into it, some landing nearby.
"Ahhhhh, this one is big!" he pulls out a large envelope and looks at the address. "Huh! This one is addressed to James P. Livingston. Now, where have I heard that name before?" as he takes another swallow of coffee he realizes, "That's me! My last name used to be Livingston. How did they know that? Who is this from anyway?"
Taking several typed pages from the envelope, he scans them to see what on earth this is all about. Reading aloud, he mutters, "uhhhhhh, this says I am the grandson of Seth Livingston. Oh yeah? Well, I guess if they say so, it must be true. I wonder if he's the one my Dad used to say was so filthy rich. I could phone up my Dad if I had a phone, and if he was still alive. He had to go off to a silly war and get a bullet through his chest, so............oh, it says here I am an heir. That sure sounds fancy! An 'heir'!! Does that mean what I think it means?..........ok, they are reading the Will on Wednesday, August 18th. When is that?"
He looks all over his room for a calendar, finally locating one at the bottom of his junk drawer. He flips to the page labeled August and sees that the 18th is on a Monday. Scratching his head, he looks at the other months to see if they might have a 18th that's on a Wednesday. Nope. Then he laughs, "This is last year's calendar! Silly me!"
He finally locates a tiny calendar for 2004; one of those given out by gas stations and credit unions.
"Here we are!" he slaps his thigh, "Wednesday, Aug. 18! But I wonder what day this is. I know, I'll go over to the mansion up the hill and look at their newspaper."
He leaves his shed and walks up the quarter-mile drive to where the mansion is glowing in the late morning sun. The newspaper has been picked up, unfortunately. Now what does he do??
Tapping on the back door, a uniformed maid comes to the window and looks out. Opening the door just a crack, she yells out, "We don't feed bums!" and slams it shut again.
Jim sighs and taps again. The same maid opens the door a crack and yells out, "I repeat....." but he cuts her off with "Just tell me today's date, would you be so kind?"
"This is Tuesday, August 17th!" she yells out before she again slams the door in his face.
Kicking stones, he wanders back down to his shed, smiling. "OK, Jimbo! You get to be an 'heir,' and tomorrow you find out what you've won!"


THE WINNERS................by Coralynn

Sally Jennings and Penelope Patterson are just finishing up their lunch when the phone rings. Sally reaches over, tipping her chair back and almost upending it, grabs the phone and greets the caller with, "Yeah. talk."
It's a recorded message. She listens carefully and then hangs up.
Snorting, she tells Penelope, who sits there dying of curiosity, "House #1 won."
"Won?"
"Yeah, the million dollars. That was Marty Henshaw. Must be he made up a recorded message and sent it to everyone's phone number. He said that, even though the project was cut short by one month, that it was a 'foregone conclusion' as he put it, that house number one was the winner by a large margin!"
"Rats."
"Yeah, well, if we hadn't had that awful WandaSue in our house, and that ridiculous Daisy woman, we could have won! I think they were put in our house to jinx our chances, ya know?"
"Bummer!"
Sally takes her plate to the sink to rinse it off, "I don't have my time travel coin back, either."
"That's right! Marilyn has it! How are you going to get it back?"
"Since Marilyn is the only decent person over at the big house on Winding Willow, maybe she'll be nice and just bring it over," Sally answers.
"You could phone her up and remind her," Penelope suggests.
"Let's give her today. If she doesn't bring it over, I'll phone her up tomorrow. I don't think we need it right away. Do you?"
"We sure don't need it to zap us into town so we can get decent food, the way we had to when we were at the 1643 House, so......."
"If WandaSue or Daisy show their faces around here, though, I'm going to take them to the worst time in recorded history! We might need it for that!" Sally declares.
"What would be the worst time in history?" Penny wonders aloud.
"Gotta think up a new one........the Ark...been there, done that; the Exodus, ditto; the eruption of Vesuvius, ditto.........well, we'll think of something!"

MEANWHILE:

WandaSue is pacing the living room of her apartment in Pleasantville again. She's restless. She has no one in whom to confide. She has no plans for the immediate future and she's angry that she didn't get in on the million dollar prize.
"It's all Daisy's fault!" she exclaims to the empty room, "If she hadn't been such a ditz, we would have won!"
She sits on the couch and flips on the shopping channel. A woman is explaining the wonders of a new exercise machine, which is supposed to thin your thighs, tighten your abdomen and raise your IQ twenty points all for a mere $600, spread out over four payments. In disgust, she clicks off the TV and paces again.
Then the idea hits her: I haven't hassled my lawfully wedded husband in several months. He must think I've given up. Ohhhh no, Billy Bob Montgomery, I will never give up till I get my hands on half your loot!"
She then realizes that she no longer has Sally's magic coin, and groans, "but I'll have to hassle him by driving to his ranch. It was so much easier when I could just zap myself there and back."
She picks up the pace on her circular walking, wracking her brain for a way to again steal that coin.

MEANWHILE:

Celebrating the Big Win rocks the big house on Winding Willow. The four women of house #1 join hands and dance some sort of manic circle dance singing out "We won!" over and over.
William, putting down his newspaper, wryly comments, "It was obvious from the first that you were going to win."
"But....." the women stop dancing, and Eleanor comments, "You know the old saying: 'it's not over till it's over'!"
"Well, it is indeed over!" William folds the paper neatly, places it on the table and stands up.
The four women, flushed with victory, rummage around in the fridge for lunch material. Celeste finds a casserole Beth was kind enough to bring over the day before, puts it in the oven and announces, "I'm going to give Marthy and Jack my quarter million."
"But Celeste! You aren't rich....you could use it!" Marilyn reasons.
"I am indeed rich, and in a resource valuable beyond money, I have a family.....all of you. There is nothing I want for."
"Awwwwww!" the other three emit and give her a group hug.
"I'm going to give them my share, too," Eleanor says, "She and Jack want to buy that cool house next to where Beth and Roger live. With this money, they'll be able to, and maybe even buy all the furniture they need."
"That's an excellent idea," Marilyn chimes in, "I'm going to give my share to the Paponetti's! Vinnie works so hard, yet they have so little."
Bess looks embarrased as she tells them, "Would it be awfully selfish of me to keep my part of the money? I need it for.....for...."
Celeste sizes up the situation immediately, "For what young ladies need money for! Yes! You are not allowed to give your quarter million away, young woman, I won't even hear of it!"
Bess smiles widely, "You guys really know how to treat a friend!"
"Friend, shmend!" Marilyn laughs, "You're family, Bess, and don't you forget it!"


MARY ELLEN: TERMINATOR.......by Terri

Mary Ellen Montgomery walked into her son's ranch house. She looked around and then looked up at the ceiling.
"And what, pray tell, is THAT?" she said.
"That's a skylight, Mother."
"I KNOW what it is, how did it get there?"
"Rosamond had it installed when I was, uh, when I was..."
"Missing? Dead? Of all the bonehead maneuvers, William, that had to be the absolute limit."
Billy Bob ignored her. She contiinued her assessment of his house. "Well, it does seem to be improved. The blue and white looks very classic. What decorator did you use, dear? Gianelli DeOreo? Gilbert Femell?"
"No, Mother. It was this way when I got the ranch back." Mary Ellen was a bit miffed. "You mean to tell me that fast little piece of baggage did all this?"
"Yes, Mom. When she turned it into a bed and breakfast."
"I still can't believe she did that! What is she, an innkeeper's daughter? Did she used to work in a tavern in England?"
"No, Mom. Her father was landed gentry. Her mother's family had an estate in Northumberland."
Mary Ellen walked around, critiqueing the house. This didn't go, that didn't go, this did not match. Finally she said, "As the former Martha Stewart would say, 'this is NOT a good thing.'"
Billy Bob threw up his hands and said, "You're right. That must be why it was a five-star bed and breakfast instead of six."
Mary Ellen said, "They don't have six-star accomodations, dear."
Billy Bob took his Maalox on the rocks and said, "Exactly."

Mary Ellen Montgomery blotted her lips with the damask napkin. "I must say, William Robert, that was wonderful. Where did you ever learn to cook Chicken Cordon Bleu like that? And with all the little garnishes? And that Salad Nicoise. Wonderful!"
Billy Bob shoved the take-out delivery boxes from Chez Pierre under the butcher block with his foot. "Oh, it was just a little something I picked up!"
"Well, it was a lot better than that food I had here LAST time! I swear, she..."
"Mary Ellen, would you PLEASE give it a rest? The girl is out of his life. More's the pity. She was a sweetheart."
"She would have taken him to the cleaners, J.R. And how would he ever prove the children would be his unless they did a DNA test everytime she dropped a baby? She would never consent to one, I'll bet, just so she could sink her hooks into him and the Montgomery fortune."
Billy Bob sat there, miserable. He finally lashed out. "Would you PLEASE stop talking about me like I wasn't here? I am here in the first person, not the third!"
A silence hung over the air. J. R. Montgomery threw down his napkin and said, "Come on, boy. Show me what you have done with the ranch since last time I was here!"
Billy Bob grabbed his hat and said, "Gladly. Let's get out of here."
Mary Ellen called at their retreating backs, "Oh, don't you worry about ME! I'm going shopping!"
SLAM!


Rosamond pulled her shorts up. She got up to her hips and tugged. Tugged. And tugged some more. She laid on her back on the bed and arched her hips and tried to pull. John watched the entire show and grinned. "You want me to get a screwdriver and some pliers?"
Rose stood up, held the shorts on either side and bounced up and down. "UH--UH--UH--UH!" punctuated each jump.
Finally, "AH! Did it!" She grabbed either side of the waistband and pulled them over. They didn't meet. She tried again. They flew back. She sighed.
John said, "Want me to help?"
She held him at arm's length. "Oh no! You're the cause of it all!"
She burst out crying and sat on the bed. John sat next to her and put his arm around her. She buried her face in his chest and said something unintelligible.
"What was that, sweetheart?"
She sobbed. "My life is ruined! RUINED! I'll never be slim again! I'm a fat blob!"
John tried not to laugh. "Oh, come on, honey! This is normal."
She cried. "No, it is NOT normal to have a baby so soon! I may as well be living in a trailer over in Shantytown! I'll have bare encrusted feet with calluses and a cut off top with a belly sticking out and food dropped on the stomach because when I drop the peanut butter and jelly--because that is the only food we can afford and it's WHITE bread--that is where it will land! Will will be setting fires in the woods and Julie will have a constant running nose because she will have a perpetual cold from the mold and mildew growing behind that lousy paper-veneered paneling!"

John's head was whirling. "Do you get these fantasies often, honey?"
Rose jumped up. "NOT FUNNY!" She dropped her shorts and threw them against the wall. "MY LIFE IS OVER!"
John shook his head and said, "Is this a hormone thing?"
Rose blew her nose and brought on another fresh round of tears. "I guess so. What I am trying to say is that I am sick and tired of being pregnant! Seems like I have been pregnant half my time in knowing you. AND YOU'RE THE CAUSE OF IT ALL! Just because you and Elizabeth couldn't have children, there is no need to take it out on me to prove something!"
John said, "Whoa now! There is no need to blame ME for this! I seem to recall I wasn't in this alone!"
Rose sniffled, "I'm sorry! I just feel so...left out! All the others had a kick-butt summer and all I did was work and ferry the kids from one thing to another. Whether it was day care or swimminig and soccer lessons, I was on call all day long!" She kicked her shorts from the floor into John's face. '' AND I HAVE NOTHING TO WEAR! EVER AGAIN! BECAUSE I WILL NEVER SEE MY FEET AGAIN!"
John took out his credit card and handed it to her. "Will this make you feel better?"
Rose broke out in a brilliant smile and said, "Ever so much!"
John said darkly, "I thought it would. Tell you what--you go shopping for a few--JUST A FEW--new outfits and I will take care of the kids this afternoon. I'll play Mr. Mom. Just take it easy on me, OK?"
Rose grabbed her purse and said, "Yes, darling! I'll even shop the sales racks at the 'Mommy Madonna' store!"
She took the credit card like a magician taking the scarf off his tophat full of rabbits. "I'll be back around five."
And John muttered, "And I'll end up in that trailer if you don't watch it."
"What, darling?"
"Nothing. Have a great afternoon!"
She blew him a kiss and ran down the stairs.

"Where are you going, Rose?"
"To the mall, Eleanor!" Rose waved John's credit card at her.
Eleanor grinned and said, "You used the trailer story on him, huh?"
Rose smilled back and said, "Yes! Worked like a charm!"

Mary Ellen Montgomery walked down the mall. Now this is more like it! Upscale. First class. Neiman Marcus...Crate and Barrel...Brooks Brothers.... Neiman-Marcus. I'll pick something up for Donna there.

Rosamond spent the better part of the afternoon trying on maternity clothes at Mommy Madonna. It was a brand new store. The saleswoman could not have been more accomodating. "Oh, Miss de Clifford!..."
"Actually, it's Mrs. Gwinnett.."
"...that blue dress looks so divine on you. It brings out the blue in your eyes."
"I like that black one over there, it looks very slimming."
The saleswoman came forward with it. "Would you like to try them on?"
Rose took the dresses in the changing room. Through the door, the saleswoman said, "How far along are you, my dear?"
The muffled reply was, "Six months. I am due the end of November."
"What you have chosen, Mrs. Gwinnett, won't go out of style very fast. You can wear them again in the near future."
Rose said, "Not if I can help it. I pray this baby is a boy! Otherwise.."
By the end of it, Rose came out with two new outfits and a new formal dress.
"I am afraid I will be at the Daytime Drama Awards in a maternity dress and looking like a baloon."
The saleswoman reassured her that she looked fine and complimented her on not having swollen ankles. At least not yet. Rose arranged for the packages to be held in package pickup until the end of the day. She then proceeded on to several other stores. Let's see, it is only right that I buy John a new shirt...and Will needs new sneakers...Julie is outgrowing EVERYTHING. John didn't tell me I couldn't buy something for the house. I think I will stop in at Neiman-Marcus...

Mary Ellen Montgomery purchased a beautiful sweater for Donna in a fuscia that went beautifully with Donna's dark hair. The salesperson wrapped it in giftwrap and Mary Ellen left the store.

Rosamond was coming into Neiman-Marcus when she came face to face with the woman that used to be her mother-in-law. "MRS. MONTGOMERY!"
Mary Ellen looked startled. "Rosamond? Is that you?" Rose said, "Yes, ma'am. It's me. What are you doing in town?"
"Visiting my son. You DO remember him, don't you?" Rosamond ignored the barb. Why does this woman make me so nervous? she asked herself.
"Are-are you in town for long?"
Mary Ellen said very cooly, "Taking care of some legal business. My dear, you don't look at all well. Your complexion is flushed."
Rose said, "I've been shopping."
Mary Ellen said, "Oh, yes. You've found yourself another man with money, haven't you, my dear. Some women just have a nose for it."
Rose looked at her unbelievingly. "I beg your pardon?" Mary Ellen said breezily, "I just mean that it is just as easy to fall in love with a poor man as it is a rich man. But then that just wouldn't do, would it?"
Rose stood there not knowing what to say because she was so totally unprepared for running into the indominable Mrs. Senator Montgomery. The human threshing machine. Chew you up and spit whatever was left out.
Mary Ellen took a step back and said surprisingly, "Why, you are..expecting? AGAIN?? Little Josie must be..."
"Julie."
"..what, only about a year now?"
"She-she's sixteen months old."
Mary Ellen crossed her arms and surveyed Rosamond. "How old are you, my dear?"
Rose stammered, "I--I'm twenty-four. Just turned."
Mary Ellen tapped her chin with her index finger. "And you probably have at least twenty-five more years of fertility. How much more careless are you going to be, Rose? Didn't I tell you when you were married to my son that there is a drugstore in every corner of every city in America? Really, there is no excuse to be turned into a baby xeroxing machine. I should think that reprobate you are married to would have either the brains or the self-control to prevent something like this happening."
Rose stood there wordlessly.
Mary Ellen said, "Well, I have to be going. Do try to have a nice day, dear. I DO hope you don't get stretch marks."
And to herself, Mary Ellen said, 'but if there is any justice in the world, you'll get them.'

Rose stood there and watched Mary Ellen walk down the mall. What just happened? And why do I feel so....depressed?

on to next part of STORY
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