"Columbus killed more Indians than Hitler killed Jews
but on his birthday you get shoes on sale"
~the goats
It makes me think that organized religion is legalized segregation.
~ANNE HECHE
"In passing, also, I would like to say that the first time Adam had a chance he laid the blame on a woman."
~NANCY ASTOR
Pornography WAS art, and i doubt anyone (or at least not too many) has ever masturbated looking at a michealangelo or van gogh.
~TAMMY THE GREAT
well, this is a napster message,
i'd like to say that in corporate north america we can
let murders out in society but not an internet program.
-Cloud Strife
"the not-self cannot have the bad,meaning they of the government and the judges and the schools cannot allow the bad because they cannot allow the self. And is not our modern society, my brothers, the story of brave malenky selves fighting these big machines?"
~Anthony Burgess
|
|
Alright. Welcome to my page of random musings. There is no point in being here. Nothing important, nothing funny, nothing interesting. It is in your best interests to turn around now and leave. If you haven't figured this out by reading the above quotes, well, then, stay, have fun, enjoy the straight jackets and free coffee. Minus the coffee. and the straight jackets, too, i guess... oh well.
|
|
Saturday, April 21, 2001
Alright. On a recent car trip, while listening to the radio, two things were brought to my attention. 1. Apparently, there are alot of unemployed people listening to Y100 (100.3), and 2. the close proximity between McDonald's toys and pornography. These conclusion's coming, of course, from the commercials. Please, let me explain. The very first ad that i heard went, approxamatly, as follows:
"We stock thousands of triple x rated videos in every store, ready for sale today! Now 10% off!!"
Or something of the sort. Now, the first question that comes to mind (or at least to my mind) is what, precisley, does one do with thousands of porno tapes? I don't imagine that they can watch all of them. Certainly not all at once. And plus, once you've got one, what's the difference? ooh, she's wearing green in this one! I mean, come on. Maybe it's just me, but it seems a little silly. And this, of course, got me to thinking. Where do they keep them all? Do they have some library especially for the porno tapes? Or perhaps they take up a wall in the study.
"and here's the study. My, what a lovely painting! Van Gogh, you say? Marvellous. And on this bookshelf, his collection of over 800 different x rated videos. Betcha don't have that one, eh?"
Let's be serious. It just doesn't work. Which led me to the conclusion that perhaps it's more of a "collect the whole set!" sort of a thing. Much like McDonald's toys. (and i'm sure you were wondering when that would come in, huh?) Once you've got one of the cheep little plastic toys, there's no point in getting another, because they're all almost completely the same. But some people have huge collections of them. Very valuable, apparently. Some people'll pay thousands of dollars for one set. And this, naturally, makes one wonder if somewhere out there is somebody who would pay thousands for a set of x rated movies. In any case, this isn't the type of person that I would want to meet on the street. And certainly not the type (i hope) that is the main focus for radio commercials. And this brings us to my other point. (alright, so it doesnt really, but i had to get there somewhere, right?) Are alot of unemployed people listening to the radio now? In about 20 minutes, it can be expected to hear at the very least two commercials relating to unemployed people. The most i've heard (in the 20 minute time frame mid you) is six. And in the same trip as that lovely porn library commercial, I heard about three. One of which really stuck out, or at least in my mind. Now, you have to understand, it didnt take the ordinary approach to appealing the jobless. If i remember correctly, it went something like this:
"Remember when they told you that dot.com companies were going to make you a millionare? When you bought hundreds of shares that you're now using to line your cat's litter box? Thousands of people were laid off as the dot.com companies crashed. So, all you dot.com-er's....come down to the pier in philly and join the fun! Pink-slip parties for all dot.com works recently fired. Have fun, dance, and maybe even get a new job! Wearing Pink highly advised."
Alright, now you've heard it. And is this not the most insane thing (besides, perhaps, entire oddly stocked libraries in people's homes) that you've ever heard? Yes, come out and celebrate your unemployment. And if you don't have a job, how are you paying for these wild parties? What employer in their right mind would go to some drinking party to find new workers? Why would any male (or anyone, really) wear pink, on purpose, by choice? These are the questions that I would like to have answered. Now. Produce. Ok, perhaps not. But it makes you wonder. Anyway, I'm going to go do something more interesting than writing this. We'll have to continue talking about this some other time.
Monday, April 23, 2001
Hey again. I do believe that when I left you last, we were discussing (or i was discussing, you for some unknown reason were listening...and still are. hmm. insanity. anyway.) something about radio commercials. Or stupidity. Same difference, eh? Well, anyway, seeing as some of you might not listen to Y100, i suppose you're wondering, "what the hell is she talking about?" Oh, you dont know? I was hoping you could tell me....oh well. What was I saying? Ahh, yes, I remember. I thought that perhaps a few examples of the commercials might help further your understand. Yeah. That was it.
"Girls, like to dance? Guys, like to watch? Then head over to maddies in malvern...dollar drafts on tuesday's..." (note: not exact commercial, obviously....what, you think i sit around and memorize these things? deal with it.)
"Egypt on the waterfront....21 to drink, 18 to party..."
"(in really fake irish accent)come to the blimeystone! 10 cent wings! beer and everthang else you would want (arr!) in a bar..."
Now, while i'm all for (or as much as the next person, that is)going out and getting smashed and waking up in some odd place next to someone you dont recall ever meeting, still, do we need this many commercials? Dont these people do anything else? And why on earth would butching an irish accent make someone want to go get drunk? I doubt that I'll ever understand the minds of marketing greats. Nor, truth be told, do I want to. (for all of you who have seen dogma, what about the gold-cow people? "and he's your son, too.") Anyway, it's probably just me. I'm sure that the idea of a fat drunk irish man eating wings is very appealing to someone. Whatever.
Sunday, August 27
"YOU'RE UNIQUE, JUST LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE"
Obviously, its been a while since i've written here. Mostly, its because I have other (but not necessarily better) things to do. But also, it has recently occured to me.... no one ever comes to my website. It simply does not happen. Now, you may think of this as a negative thing. No, not really. But now, talking as is there was anyone at all listening (so to speak) sounds rather... dare i say crazy? (Due to the slight lack of both concern and audience, I believe i shall dare.) And of course, the best place to hide ones inner most thoughts is in the open, where, though easily accessable to millions, they shall be read by no more than a few. And I began to think about this in more depth. It's most certainly no fun to write to yourself, hence the obvious decline in old-fasioned diaries. However, to write to others... now here was a different story. Unfortunatly, no one wants to listen to me. So i figure, if one read this, they would conclude me far gone into the depths of insanity, no doubt. Therefore, there is no harm in writing as if i believe someone will ever read it. So, for future reference, no i'm not just talking to myself. So there. :P
Now. Onto today's delema...what to write? Since we have established that this is a diary, that... really means nothing at all. People can write whatever they want in a diary. Often, they write tales of intrigue... tales of unriqited love, hardships, undying passions and hatreds...and gossip, of course, but thats a nasty habit. So protical would sugest i tell the world who i am currently deeply in love with, who i cannot stand to be near, who thwarted some recent plan of mine, and who was wearing the worst pants you've ever seen. ::yawns:: how droll. who wants to hear about that, anyway? no wonder people keep their diaries secret...they obviously have no creativity nor writing talent. (although the latter is not proven...they may just be skillfully hiding it.) I hope my unseemingly wish to do something somewhat out of the ordinary will be tolerated by the hundreds and thousands of you, whom just may be hanging on my every word. (lol, yeah, and queen elizabeth is secretly a reincarnation of hilter's long lost dog. hey, it could happen!) Anyway, i'm terribly busy, and i think i've written quite enough today, thank you very much. Now, if you'll excuse me (which i'm sure you will) i have a car to wash.
why don't people's beards grow past the neck? i don't really know. they only go down a little past the chin, then they stop.
there's a movie called MVP: Most Valuable Primate, with a monkey who plays hockey. i wonder if they realize that people are primates too. it's kind of sad that the monkey is the best player on the team.
give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. teach a man to fish, and he will grow a beard and wear suspenders. and since when does a man eat for a day with one fish? it must be a big fish. i hope he's not allergic.
well today was a normal school today. tomorrow's friday friday FRIDAY! and we all know what that means.
it means today is Thursday.
If something is cool and old, it's called "vintage", but if something is dorky and old, it's called "antique". Antiques are usually worth more, though. I haven't the foggiest idea why.
Why can't you grow out body parts like you can grow out your hair? You can have hair in different styles too, gelled, afro, mohawk, crew cut, et cetera...but legs and feet and ears and stuff are pretty much the same. You should be able to grow out your lips, or your ears, or something, and put them in different styles and stuff. or maybe it's just me.
I wonder if the Muffin Man is on very many mailing lists. Maybe he gave out his personal info a little too much or something...but I wouldn't want people singing about me...Do you know Jess jess jess? Jess jess jess? Jess jess jess. Do you know Jess Jess jess? She lives in Collegeville. Imagine how scary that would be. People randomly humming about you. The lyrics to your song coming up in movies, like shrek, or on Jeapordy... thats worse than being famous. Famous people get shot all the time, and people look through their trash. That must suck.
Computers are confusing. How do you have a desktop on a laptop? Is a byte bigger than a nibble? Are hertzes endangered with so many people killing them? What do they call America Online in other countries? And whoever named all the cookies and bytes and Macintosh Apples and stuff seriously needs to lay off he holiday leftovers. So many questions, so little....interest
|
|
|