A guy goes into a bar with an ostrich and a cat. "I'll have a beer," said the man and the ostrich. "I'll have a beer, but I'm not paying for it!" said the cat. So then the guy pays the bartender and pulls the exact change out of his pocket.
The next night, the man returns to the bar with the ostrich and the cat. "I'll have a Scotch," said the man and the ostrich. "I'll have a Scotch, but I'm not paying for it!" said the cat. So the guy pays and pulls out exact change once again.
The bartender is amazed and asks the man "How do you always pull the exact change out of your pockets? You never fumble with money or anything, you just pull the exact amount out of your pocket." The man replied, "Well, one day I was walking on a beach when I found an old lamp, and when I rubbed it, a genie came out and granted me two wishes. For my first wish, instead of wishing for a million dollars that could be spent and run out, I wished to always have the exact amount of money I needed in my pocket."
"That makes a lot of sense," said the bartender, "but what about your second wish."
"Now thats where I screwed up," said the man as he looks over at the ostrich and the cat. "I wished for a long-legged chick with a tight pussy."
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