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  Disclaimer: I do not own any of the HB characters and I'm not making any money anyway.
Categories: H, Fam, V, tiny bit of Future (as in only a little in the future)
Author: Michelle aka Bryne
 
  Smooth, Suave…Jonny? (I think not.)
 
 
 
  *I can do this,* Jonny thought to himself as he walked up to the ticket counter of the air port. *I can do this.* He shook his blond head. *Ah, who’m I kidding, no I can’t.*
“May I help you, sir?” asked a friendly young counter clerk, an American Airlines tag pinned to the front of her shirt. She smiled broadly at him, taking in the cut of his cream-colored dress slacks and comfortable, matching blazer. Looking him up and down before nodding approvingly, she turned to her computer.
“Um, yes. Yes, you may,” he said, more decisively than he felt. “I’d like to book your next flight to London, England.” Jonny had been behind on his schoolwork, so his father had left him home while he, Race, and Hadji had jetted off to England, happy to pick him up at the airport whenever he arrived. Being his senior year in school, his father felt it was imperative that he not fall behind.
She smiled warmly at him. “Certainly.” She asked for his information and quickly made up the ticket, giving him the price.
“All right,” he replied calmly, “let me get out my credit card.” Well, not his credit card, his father’s actually. But for the moment, it was Jonny’s. Reaching to the carry on bag hanging around his neck, he tugged at the zipper. Nothing happened.
Giving the clerk an embarrassed smile, he frowned in concentration and tugged on it again. The zipper refused to give. “Come on,” he muttered to himself, yanking harder. “Come on!”
“Sir?” the woman asked uncertainly, but Jonny ignored her, lost in his own little world consisting of himself, the bag, and the reluctant zipper. Harder and harder he tugged until finally, and lavishly, the zipper gave way. The side of the bag flew open, projecting the contents; coins of various currencies, a folder with papers all of which fell out, after shave, a passport, little black book, chewing gum and a wallet; in every which direction.
He watched, dumbstruck, as a hundred carefully typed pages of his history report rained down from the place to mix with file records, government requests, and various pieces of poetry Jessie had sent him. The coins bounced about, rolling to their heart’s content or until the crashed into some unmoving object. The after shave disappeared all together and the wallet… “AH!” Jonny cried, slipping on the wallet as he moved to search for it. THWUNK. He landed flat on his back.
“Sir!” cried the horrified woman running out from behind her desk to help him up. Jonny groaned.
“At least I found my wallet,” he said weakly, giving her a brave smile as she supported him.
“Oh,” she said, slightly shocked. Noticing his smile, she returned her own soft one. “Let me help you up.” The two of them got up, Jonny staggering slightly as he got to his feet.
“Thank you.” She smiled again. “You’re more than welcome.” He handed her his charge card. She took it and helped him gather his things before ringing up his ticket.
“There you go, sir, one ticket to London, England. Have a nice day.” Jonny sighed.
“I’ll try,” he replied, turning.
“Um, sir?” asked the woman. Jonny turned back to her and lifted an eyebrow in question. “I’m do to go on my break in a minute, why don’t I escort you to your terminal? Just to make sure you don’t get into any more accidents.” Jonny smiled warmly at her.
“I’d appreciate it, but please, call me Jonny.”
****** *Finally,* Jonny thought to himself as he leaned back in his chair. He was now onboard his flight, as comfortably positioned in a not so comfortable airplane chair as possible, all thanks to the lovely flight attendant at the gate and the woman from the ticket counter. He had gotten there with only one small mishap, but as he had assured the old woman, accidents happened. Casually, he looked out the window, happy to have the window seat.
The captain’s voice boomed over the intercom. “Hi, folks,” said the cheerful voice. Jonny could hear the terminal detaching from the plane. “You may have read about some pilot son a major airline who dozed off while at the controls.” Jonny squirmed uneasily in his seat. “No need to worry about that on this flight. I’ve taken something to keep me alert and I feel great! Now, let’s go really fast, okay?” Jonny looked around him at the other passengers including his seatmate, only to see them looking all around as well. “Ready, set, go!” shouted the pilot. The plane began its turn and made its way down the runway. “Varooom!” Up went the plane and up went Jonny’s stomach with his lunch. Quickly, he grabbed for the airsick bag, conveniently provided by the thoughtful airline services.
“Oh goodness!” cried a stewardess as she slid back and forth through the isles. “Lisa!” she cried, “Get some napkins!” Another woman ran toward her, sliding back and forth as she went. Together, the two distributed the large pack of napkins to their sick passengers.
“Here!” someone shouted at him, shoving a napkin his way.
Jonny moaned and wiped his mouth with the napkin provided by the stewardess. “Oooh.”
“There, there son, you’re all right,” said the elderly woman next to him. He smiled weakly at her as she patted his back. “That crazy take off scared all of us.”
“Well that was fun!” cried the intercom. “How about we do some trick now?” The plane did a one-eighty followed by a complicated set of mid-air stunts.
He nodded before diving back to his bag and getting sick again.
***** Jonny closed his eyes and concentrated on his breathing. It had been a while since the last turn had sent one of the stewardesses slipping and sliding up the isle to the cock pit to inform the pilots that the passengers were threatening to jump. That had stopped most of the stunts and since then, all had been relatively quiet.
“Excuse me, sir,” asked a polite voice. Jonny pried open his eyes and turned his head to the side. “Would you like something to drink? It might settle your stomach.”
“Yes, thank you.” Smiling at the handsome young man, the stewardess waited for him to take down his tray table and handed him a coke over the woman beside him who had, sometime during the flight, pulled out a book.
Setting the glass on his tray table, Jonny reached into the back compartment of the chair in front of him to get out a magazine. He would have been better off staying put. The soda, obviously possessing a mind of its own, jumped in front of his hand and knocked itself over, consequently spilling onto the lap of his travel companion. “Ah!” cried the woman, jumping up in her seat. Quite a feat considering she still had her seat belt on. Jonny jumped as well, both startled by the sudden cry and ready to help her clean up, and smacked his knees soundly against the tray table which was still down. A stewardess came running. Armed with a roll of paper towels, she quickly cleaned up the woman and replaced Jonny’s drink.
The last thing might have turned out to be a mistake as Jonny’s arm spasmed out of control and ruthlessly slammed into the new cup, toppling the contents back onto his recently dried seatmate.
“Ah!” cried the woman, hopping up from her seat and starting a particularly explicit oath beginning with ‘oh’ and ending in ‘sake’. Jonny flinched as the stream of curses and shouting rained down on him. Another stewardess hurried toward them and calmly escorted the woman to the bathroom where she once again cleaned and dried her.
A moment later she returned, but instead of being followed by the kind elderly woman, next to her was a giant of a man who was so tall he had to duck his head as he walked through the plane.
“I’ve brought you a new seatmate,” she informed him before turning and heading back to where ever it is annoyed stewardesses go.
“Hi,” Jonny said, smiling timidly and giving a little wave. The man gave him a look and sat down, promptly turning his back to Jonny. Jonny made a face at his back, retracted his tray table, and turned to face the window. As he turned, he noticed his shoelace was untied.
Looking at it for a moment, he decided to tie it. Bending over, he reached for the unruly piece of string just as the man in front of him threw his seat back into full recline. Jonny found himself trapped by the chair, helplessly pinned in the crash position, not to mention that his finger had somehow managed to lodge itself firmly in his shoe.
He sat there for a while, unable to move, while his finger went numb. Finally, he was able to pry his finger out from between his laces and the flap on the side of his shoe. With his other hand he rubbed the sore digit and tried to massage the feeling back into it. Once he had restored some sense of circulation, he set about devising a way to get out from underneath the chair. Nothing springing to mind, Jonny allowed his basic survival instincts to kick in.
Through some miracle, he managed rotate his shoulder enough so that he was able to reach over and grab the leg of the man next to him. Startled, the man pulled his leg away, trying to shake off the hand, but Jonny held on. Clawing his way up the man’s pant leg, he was eventually able to haul himself up a bit and slide out from underneath the seat in front of him.
Breathing hard, he leaned back in his own chair. Next to him, the man was crying desperately for a stewardess. The stewardess rushed toward them.
“I can’t stay here any longer!” he declared, jumping out of his seat. “This man is crazy! He kept grabbing my pants!” Jonny looked over at him angrily. *Some people have no concern for others,* he thought darkly.
“If I may interject,” Jonny began. “No you may not!” cried the other passenger. “Get me another seat!” The stewardess nodded.
“Follow me.” She gave Jonny a strange look. “You stay right there.”
“Will someone else be coming to sit with me?” he asked.
“No, no, no,” she answered quickly, giving him a nervous, fleeting smile. “I think you’ve met enough new people for today. Why don’t you just sit back and relax.” Jonny nodded and buried his face in his hands as she quickly left with her peeved charge.
****** Jonny spent the rest of the flight alone, doing nothing save sitting quietly with his hands in his lap. Sometime along the way, he pulled out a pen and paper from the naughty carry on bag that had cause him so much trouble at the ticket terminal hours before. For a while he wrote, occasionally nibbling on his pen for inspiration, until a cooing voice from his side caught his attention.
“First flight?” asked the seductive voice. Jonny looked up from what he was writing to see who had enough nerve to talk to his accident-prone self. It was a woman, nothing like the elderly woman who had been his first victim, who was, of all things, trying to flirt with him. This one was gorgeous and young, twenty-five at most. Her skin was the color of coffee with milk and her eyes were like dark chocolate squares set on a pool of white chocolate. Her lips were twin strawberries resting side by side and her hair was long and straight, the color of licorice under the lamps at a candy store. It was at that moment that Jonny realized he was very hungry.
“Um, no, actually. I usually avoid public flights for…obvious reasons.” He sent her a lopsided grin, secretly concentrating on whether or not he could wait till he landed to eat or not.
She smiled back at him, oblivious to his lack of attention. “So, what brings you to the world of commercialized airlines?” Jonny sighed inwardly, but launched into a description of why he was stuck there, leaving out the more unbelievable details.
“This is your captain speaking,” came the captain’s voice over the intercom, much more subdued than it had been at the beginning of the flight. “We will be landing in five minutes. Please put on your seatbelts and place your tray tables in the full and upright position. We hope you have enjoyed your flight, somewhat, and won’t complain to the company too much. We apologize for any trauma we may have caused. Thank you for riding American Airlines. We hope you’ll ride again soon.” There was some low grumbling and the then the intercom switched off.
Jonny put away his things and leaned back to brace himself for landing. His stomach was already flipping from the mention. Thankfully, this part went smoothly enough that Jonny could almost dispel the take off. Almost, but not quite. Once on the ground, Jonny felt much better.
Unbuckling his seatbelt, Jonny managed to rise, collect his carry on and bid adieu to his lovely companion without mishap. Getting off the plane, he walked swiftly through the terminal to the baggage claim and went to pick up his things.
“Jonny!” yelled a familiar voice. Jonny turned, casually grabbing his suitcase as he did so. As it lifted from the rotating wheel, the snaps holding it closed came undone and the contents fell out. Jonny scowled at the suitcase and the loose articles of clothing covering the floor.
“I’m over here,” he called to no one in particular as he stooped to pick up the things.
“Jonny, son!” “Hi dad,” Jonny replied dejectedly as he put his things away.
“What happened?” his father asked in concern. “Nothing important,” he assured him, finishing up and snapping the case shut. “So, what’s happening?” He looked up at his father.
“Well, the English government has asked us-”
“Jonny!” cried another voice.
“Hey Hadj!” he called back, waving as his brother came through the crowd.
From his side, Jonny hear his father gasp. “Jonny, what happened to your teeth?” he demanded.
“What are you talking about?” he asked, perplexed.
“Well, they’re, they’re blue!” Jonny looked confused, then horrified.
“Nooo!” he cried, smacking his hand against his head. “It must have happened on the plane. I was writing something and I stopped to think and chewed on my pen. And, ah! No!”
“What?” Hadji asked as he arrived at his father’s side, totally confused.
“When I stopped writing, a woman started talking to me. I must have had pen on my teeth the whole time!” He shook his head sadly as his family exchanged looks over his head.
  *****
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