a/n: If you’ve seen this before- there’s a good reason. I did post part of it…but it needed some more substance…and I wanted to post a longer part. So a few days after posting it, I took it off Fanfic.net to do some editing and stuff. It’s now a hundred times better and much longer. I’ve been working on this forever (since before thanksgiving), but here it is! My new, best I’ve ever written, longest, series!!!! I’m so excited to finally be posting (or re-posting) part of this. It’s all about Remus’s life from age 10 and up. I gave him a brother in this one...you’ll find out a lot about him and Remus’s dad later. I might use pieces of my REMUS series in this later...so don’t be surprised if you have a feeling you’ve read a piece of one of my later chapters before. Please r/r and I’ll be happy to do the same to your stories. (I’ll also beta-read for anyone interested).

disclaimer: all these cool characters belong to J.K. Rowling (the genius…what would I read every night and type everyday without her?!) except for Aunt Myrestrial and Romulus (who I might add, is my new favorite character besides Remus.)

~ The Way it Began ~

"Huh?"

Ten-year-old Remus Norwich awoke to find himself in a muggle car speeding down an endless stretch of fields.

"Where are we Rom?" asked Remus.

"Shh! We’re headed somewhere again. Dad went out drinking again last night. Mum didn’t want to risk him beating you up again after last night."

Remus suddenly realized the reason he had slept through all this; last night was the full moon.

"We’re not going back this time." Mrs. Norwich said from the front seat. "I can’t risk him hurting you again Remus, from hurting any of us."

Remus’s eyes filled with tears as he starred angrily at the bruise on his arm. A souvenir of the last time his father came home drunk, Remus hated the still-healing mark. An alcoholic since he found out about his half-human son, Remus often blamed himself for his father’s actions. At only ten, Remus had experienced pain his entire life. Becoming a werewolf at four was enough, but now they were running from his father.

"Remus, you okay?" Romulus asked.

Remus nodded, gripping his brother’s hand tightly. Six years his elder, Romulus would be in his sixth year at Hogwarts upon returning in the fall.

"Where are we headed mum?" Remus asked. He tried to sit up in the sear, but his head swam and he doubled over coughing.

"Lie back down Remus" she said gently, "You nearly had a concussion last night. When I ran to get you to the car, you had cuts all over."

Remus moaned, curling up on the seat with the blankets tucked around him.

"We’re going to Wales," his mum said shortly. "Your aunt Myrestrial lives there. We’ll be going as the Lupin family. That’s my maiden name. So from now on, you are Remus and Romulus Lupin."

"Which aunt is she?" Remus asked sleepily.

"The healer"

"Ah yes" mumbled Remus. He pulled the blankets tighter around him and laid his head in Romulus’s lap. Rom gently rubbed his brother’s hair as Remus closed his eyes to sleep.

The countryside rolled by as the family drove on. For hours it seemed, Remus slept as Rom gazed out the window. Finally, they rolled up to a modest brick house with a plump middle aged witch waiting out front.

~ Coming Home Again~

"Remus? Wake up sweetie."

Remus opened his slate gray eyes to stare into a pair of kind blue ones.

"I’m your aunt Myrestrial." the witch above Remus said happily. "Let’s get you inside and fixed up."

Remus struggled to sit up. Pulling his blankets around him, he limped slowly to the house. Aunt Myrestrial helped Remus into a room off from the kitchen. A set of bunk beds lay nestled in the corner and a small window showed an amazing view of the vast countryside. A suitcase lay partially open on the floor. It was filled with Remus’s clothes, shoved hurriedly inside. Another case lay next to it, filled with Romulus’s belongings.

"You can have the bottom for now Remus".

His aunt helped Remus into bed and pulled a blanket over him. She kissed him gently on the forehead as she turned to leave.

"Now you go to sleep. We’ll take care of some of your cuts when you wake up." she said.

"Where’s my mum?" muttered Remus groggily.

"She’s having a rest. I’ll take care of her for you."

Aunt Myrestrial left, leaving Remus to sleep. Too dizzy to get up, but too worried to sleep, Remus lay motionless. After about an hour, Romulus joined Remus in the bedroom. He sat cross-legged on the floor, strumming his guitar.

"How are you doing Remus?" Romulus asked gently.

Remus rolled over to look at his brother, his eyes filling with angry tears. Rom climbed up onto the bed and pulled his younger brother into a hug.

"Shh" he whispered softly, rubbing Remus’s back, "I know you’re upset."

"It’s all my fault!" sobbed Remus, "I made dad act like that."

"No Remus." said Rom angrily, "Don’t you ever think that!"

"I know" said Remus, tears still streaming down his face.

"We love you" Rom said gently, "Mum and I don’t care what you are Rem. She left to protect you. Don’t forget that Remus."

Remus nodded miserably. Romulus rustled his hair playfully and left the room. Alone again, Remus was reduced to silent tears.

~ What I Lost ~

A year passed quickly. Romulus graduated from Hogwarts and came home that summer. Remus had endured long days at home with his mother, studying spell books in the kitchen and teaching himself to play Rom’s guitar. Remus was to be home schooled, for his attendance at Hogwarts was impossible with his transformation and all. As the end of the summer came nearer, Romulus left home for his job as a junior member of the department of wizarding relations at the Ministry of Magic. The department dealt with vampires, giants, and of course, werewolves. Upon leaving, Rom pulled Remus aside and whispered,

"Bye Remus. I’ll sure miss you."

Remus smiled weakly, "I’ll miss you too Rom."

Romulus pulled his brother into a quick hug. When they broke apart, Remus was surprised to see that Rom was crying. Wiping tears from his eyes, Romulus whispered,

"There will be a letter coming for you soon. A friend of mine is doing you a big favor."

Remus nodded seriously, his steel gray eyes gazing into Rom’s light brown ones.

"Bye Rom" Remus said miserably, "Love you."

"Love you too Remus." Rom said weakly, "But don’t worry about my leaving. You’ll have a great time while I’m gone. Take care of my guitar for me."

"Yeah sure" Remus mumbled, "Sitting home doing work with mum will be loads of fun."

Something in Rom’s eyes twinkled mischievously as Remus said this. Giving his mother one last hug, Romulus disappereated.

Remus turned and ran blindly to his room. Flopping down on his bed, he buried his head beneath his pillow and lay still. Aunt Myrestrial turned out his light quietly as Remus dozed off to sleep.

~What I Found~

Remus awoke to hear a sharp tapping upon the window. Throwing it open, he let in a rush of cool air, along with a large tawny owl. Remus rubbed his eyes sleepily, untying the letter from the owl’s leg. Ruffling its feathers importantly, the owl took off out the open window. Remus turned his attention back to the thick envelope. Flipping it over, he immediately recognized the Hogwart’s seal.

"Hogwarts?" he said aloud. Was this the letter Rom had been talking about? Curiously, Remus ripped open the envelope. Four pieces of parchment fell to the floor. Remus bent down and picked up the top one.

Dear Mr. Lupin,

We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment.

Term begins September 1. We await your owl by no later the July 31.

Yours Sincerely,

Remus gaped open mouthed at the letter in his hand. Shifting his gaze downward, he noticed that the second piece of parchment bore a note, written in a tidy scrawl.

Dear Remus J. Lupin,

I do know about your certain "circumstances", as I taught your brother Romulus who told me. I, like your brother, believe that anyone capable of magic should attend Hogwarts. As I will be taking over for Headmaster Dippet at the beginning of term (he is retiring), I will be allowing you to attend Hogwarts with certain safety precautions. I’m sure you’ll fit in nicely as your brother tells me you are a kind and intelligent young man. If you have any questions, please feel free to contact me by owl.

Sincerely,

Albus Dumbledore

Remus became dizzy with joy. His stomach was doing flip-flops and his heart felt ready to burst.

"MUM!" he screamed, "AUNT MYRISTEL!"

They both came dashing in, still in their nightclothes. Ms. Lupin grabbed Remus and held him to her.

"Shh, Rem." she said, "It’s okay. Did you have a nightmare?"

"No, no" said Remus impatiently, pushing his mum away. Aunt Myristel was reading the note from Dumbledore.

"Oh Remus!" she gasped, "This is wonderful!"

Ms. Lupin read the letter, tears filling her eyes.

"Oh honey!" she whispered, hugging Remus, "If only your father knew."

Remus frowned. It had been a long time since his dad had been mentioned under Aunt Myristel’s roof.

"You’ve come so far Remus!" his mum said emotionally.

"He’s not even chewing his blankets anymore!" his aunt pointed out.

Remus laughed. It was one of his few unhuman habits. At night, he would often chew away at the edge of his bedspread.

"You hardly ever have nightmares anymore either" his mum said.

Shuddering, Remus brushed his hair carelessly out of his eyes. For his entire childhood, his dreams had been plagued with thoughts of accidentally biting someone or attacking his family. Sometimes he saw his father, chasing the wolf in a drunken rage. Often times Remus awoke screaming and sobbing, terrified out of his mind. Ms. Lupin noticed the look of fear in Remus’s eyes immediately.

"What’s the matter Rem?" she asked softly.

Remus looked away and then violently grabbed the note from his aunt’s hand.

"It’s impossible!" he said angrily, tearing the note into tiny pieces. "No one will want me there anyhow."

"Remus" his mum said patiently, "You should at least give it a try. Why not?"

"Because!" Remus barked, "No one will like me, and everyone will hate me, and I’ll be put in Slytherin because of what I am, and someone will find out!"

"You don’t know that yet Remus." his aunt replied, "You haven’t given it a chance."

Tears began to roll down Remus’s face. "Stop lying to me!" he yelled, "You know it’s a crazy idea! You know it’s impossible!"

Ms. Lupin reached out and gently pulled Remus into a hug. He sobbed quietly into her shoulder.

"Think of all the fun that you’ll have!" she told him, "It will be so much better then sitting at home with your old mum!"

Remus forced a smile. "What will I tell them when I have to leave on the moons?"

"Tell them that I’m sick" his mum suggested.

"Or that I’m on my deathbed" his aunt added.

"And that I’ve gone to visit you?" Remus asked, "That could work…"

"I’m sure it will" his mum said happily, "And you’ll get to go to Hogwarts!"

Remus grinned, "Yeah mum, I guess I will."

~Diagon Alley~

Three days before the new school year came, Remus awoke with a start.

"MUM!" he yelled, "Can we go now? Can we?!"

Ms. Lupin came running in. She laughed when she saw Remus still in bed. "Remus! You’re still in your nightclothes! I think Diagon Alley can wait until after breakfast, don’t you?"

Remus jumped out of bed and changed into his nicest robes (the ones with only a small rip at the hem.). Surveying himself in the mirror, Remus frowned. Although he never cared much for his appearance, it suddenly mattered to him. He noticed that his robes hung loosely off his thin shoulders and that his sandy brown hair was several centimeters too long. His face was thin and his eyes shadowed. It was all an effect of the transformations. Shaking his head, Remus headed downstairs for breakfast.

Ms. Lupin set a bowl of hot cereal on the table before Remus, along with a cup of tea. "Eat." she commanded.

Remus shook his head. "I’m not hungry."

Ms. Lupin frowned. "Come on Remus. You’ll regret it tonight."

Remus shook his head again. He knew his mum was right. It was the full moon tonight and Remus knew the wolf would be even more violent if it was hungrier then usual.

Ms. Lupin laid her hand on Remus forehead. " Maybe you ought to stay home today. Go back to bed Remus."

"No!" said Remus, sitting up taller in his chair. "We have to get my robes and books."

His mum sighed. "Okay Remus. Let’s go."

Grasping pinches of Floo Powder, Remus and his mum stepped into the fireplace and with shouts of, "Diagon Alley!" they burst upward and out of sight.

Stepping out the Leaky Cauldron, Remus blinked in the sunlight.

"Let’s go to Madam Malkin’s Robes." Ms. Lupin suggested. "I already have some money from when I was here with Rom a while ago."

Remus nodded and followed his mum into the brightly-lit robe shop. A young witch stepped up to the counter and asked,

"Hogwarts?"

Remus nodded.

"How many pairs of robes?"

"Only one" Ms. Lupin said quickly. Remus tried not to show his disappointment. He knew the family didn’t have much money, but Romulus’s old school robes were going to be huge on him.

"Right this way please!" the young witch told Remus.

"I’ll be at Flourish and Blotts to get your books Remus." his mum called. Nodding a quick okay, Remus hurried after the storekeeper.

"Just stand here." she told Remus, pointing to a wooden block. Remus stepped upon it, now several inches taller then the storekeeper. She whipped out a measuring tape that began whizzing around in mid-air, pausing every so often to jot measurements down on a piece of parchment.

Remus stood quite still, his eyes darting around the measuring room.

"All done!" the young witch said after a few moments. She grabbed the still-flittering measuring tape and picked up the parchment.

"My, my boy" she said, glancing at the measurements, "You are very thin. Have you been ill?"

Remus panicked, searching his mind for a lie to satisfy the shopkeeper.

"Oh yes," he lied, "I had a nasty bout with pneumonia a few weeks ago. A healer cleared it up."

"Oh you poor thing!" the shopkeeper said, "Well, glad to hear you are better." With a wave of her wand, a set of black robes appeared. Remus took them and hurried out of the store with a quick "thanks!"

Ms. Lupin was waiting for Remus outside Flourish and Blotts. She was chatting with another witch who had her son waiting impatiently next to her.

"Oh, here he is now." Ms. Lupin said as Remus approached. "This is my son Remus. Rem, this is Mrs. Black and her son Sirius."

"Hello." Remus offered. Sirius merely nodded. Remus wasn’t sure what to say, as his mum was talking to Mrs. Black again.

"Have you got your wand yet?" Sirius asked in an attempt to make conversation.

"No, not yet." Remus replied. "I just came from getting my robes."

"Oh." said Sirius, "This is mine." He pulled his wand from under the folds of his robes. "It’s 15 inches, redwood, with a dragon heartstring. The man said it will be good for transfiguration."

Remus nodded. "It’s very nice. What house do you want to be in?"

Sirius smiled. "Gryffindor of course!"

Remus grinned back. "Yeah. My mum was a Ravenclaw. My brother Rom was a Gryffindor."

"So you guess you’ll be in Ravenclaw or Gryffindor?" asked Sirius.

"I think so." Remus lied. Deep down, he supposed that the werewolf trait would send him right into Sytherin.

"Come on Sirius!" Mrs. Black called.

"Hey Remus- I’ll see you on the Hogwarts Express!" said Sirius, running over to his mum.

"Bye!" Remus waved, watching Sirius disappear into the crowd of shoppers.

"See?" his mum said, "I knew you’d meet some nice boys who like you."

"Yeah" thought Remus, staring into the crowd for a glimpse of Sirius. "Too bad he’ll never be in my house."

"Let’s go buy your wand" his mum suggested brightly.

Remus followed his mum into Ollivander’s wand shop. A funny looking old man stepped into the light from a back room.

"Ah! Mrs. Alana Norwich!" the man exclaimed. "15 inches, oak, with a unicorn tail hair. Nice for potion spells."

"Actually, it’s Ms. Lupin now." Remus’s mom said quickly, "and we’re here to get a wand for my son Remus."

"Ah yes. A Hogwarts first year. Step over here young Remus…"

"Lupin as well" Remus said apologetically.

"Okay Remus Lupin, let’s try this one. 12 inches, cedar, phoenix feather."

Remus took the wand and waved it, feeling foolish.

"No, no!" Mr. Ollivander said, pulling the wand from Remus. "Try this one. 15 inches, oak, dragon heartstring."

Remus tried wand after wand until his hand felt ready to fall off. Finally Mr. Ollivander shoved a

"14 inch, cherry, phoenix feather."

into his hand. Remus smiled broadly as the wand shot sparks into the air.

"Excellent!" Mr. Ollivander breathed. "This wand is an excellent choice for an auror. It helps to have in Defense Against the Dark Arts."

Remus’s mom paid for the wand and they left Ollivander’s rather quickly.

"What a funny man!" Remus said.

"Yes" Ms. Lupin laughed, "Rather quirky, isn’t he? Now, moving on, what else do you need? You have robes, a wand, Rom’s cauldron and scales…is that all?"

Remus nodded, eyed Eelop’s Owl Emporium longingly.

"Ah yes!" said Ms. Lupin tracing Remus gaze, "We’ll need to get you an owl."

Remus followed his mum into the owl store almost bursting with joy. Inside the smell was overwhelming and cages lined every corner of the walls. Remus ran up and down the aisles of the store, pausing every so often to take a closer look at an owl. Finally he came to a dead halt in front of a large cage in the back. Inside sat a sleeping barn owl with its head under its wing.

"This one mum!" Remus said excitedly.

Ms. Lupin smiled and lifted the owl’s cage carefully. The owl inside awoke and gave a hoot of surprise. Then it turned its great yellow eyes to look at Remus intently.

"I’ll call him Vulcan." said Remus, "After the mythical god of fire, because his wings flash in the light like flames."

"Indeed they do!" Ms. Lupin said as Vulcan stretched his reddy-brown wings in the sunshine. "Are you ready to go home Remus? It will be getting dark in a few hours."

Remus nodded, trying to stifle a yawn. After paying for Vulcan, he followed his mum back to the fireplace in the Leaky Cauldron and they took the Floo network home.

~Moon Rising~

"Remus!" his mum called soon after they arrived home, "Come have some dinner!"

Outside, the sky was beginning to darken slightly as Remus came traipsing down the stairs, a heavy blanket wrapped around his shoulders.

"I’m not hungry" he said miserably, collapsing onto the sofa.

"Please eat something Remus!" his mum pleaded, "It will make everything much easier tonight."

"No" moaned Remus, "I don’t feel good anyway."

Ms. Lupin frowned as Remus lay shivering slightly on the couch. "What’s the matter Rem? You usually aren’t this sick before."

Remus knew exactly why, but he refused to admit it. The whole nervousness of Hogwarts was adding to the pre-transformation effects.

"Well, if you’re not going to eat, at least have some tea."

Remus nodded, curling up on the sofa, the blankets tight around him. He took the steaming cup of tea from his mother and took a few small sips. Sleepily, he began to lie down.

"Come on Remus" his mum said gently, "You have to go downstairs now."

Remus fumbled with the blankets and stood up shakily. He made his way to the basement where Ms. Lupin was lifting the heavy silver bar blocking the door. Remus winced as his hand brushed it accidentally. The only way to keep the door secure, the silver bar was absolute torture to Remus as a wolf. It was lined with wolfsbane leaves and several inches of pure silver. It wasn’t often that Remus woke up after a transformation without burns from the silver lining his shoulders.

"Let’s go Remus," his mum said, "we’ll get you settled."

Remus curled up on the concrete floor under a ragged and torn blanket. The room was almost completely dark except for a few strands of light filtering from a boarded-up window. Remus’s mom gave him a quick kiss and a "good luck" before bolting the basement door behind her.

~Dawn~

"Remus? Remus, wake up."

Remus opened his eyes slowly and then closed them in a wince of pain. His aunt was cleaning cuts upon his legs, which Remus had attempted to tear to shreds.

"Where’s it hurt Rem?" a distant voice asked.

"Everywhere" Remus managed to choke out.

"Come on, let’s get you to bed."

Remus felt himself being lifted gently. Everything was now a dull ache, as if his entire body was numb. He felt himself sink into his pillows, and then he knew no more.

~After Effects~

"Poor thing" said a voice, ripping through Remus dreams, "He looks so peaceful."

Remus opened his eyes gradually, causing a fresh shot of pain to shoot through his head from the bright sunshine. He winced, rubbing his temple.

"Remus?" another voice said softly, "How are you feeling?"

"Huh?"

"Rem, it’s me. Shh."

"Rom?"

"Yeah. Just go back to sleep."

"Okay" Remus whispered.

Rom was sitting on the floor, strumming his guitar aimlessly as Remus slept. Evening fell and night came quickly. Remus slept on, his closed eyes rimmed with deep shadows and his chest slowly rising and falling. The waning moon rose and still Remus slept, his eyes heavy with pure exhaustion. He only awoke to take small sips of water or to call his mother. The night carried on, and only the sound of the heavy rain outside could be heard along with Remus’s shallow breathing.

~Leaving All I Know~

"Rem! Remus! Wake up!"

Remus rolled over in bed moaning. Waking up was the last thing he wanted to do. He sat up slowly and rubbed his circled eyes.

"What time is it?" he asked to the voice that had awoken him.

"Nearly seven, but your train comes at nine."

Remus’s eyes flew open. He nearly fell out of bed with excitement. Romulus laughed, watching his sleepy brother from the doorway. Remus stumbled over to his dresser and began pulling out shirts and pairs of jeans. Romulus was already dressed in a handsome jumper and khakis. Remus pulled on a pair of blue jeans and a light gray shirt. He followed his brother downstairs and took a seat at the table. His aunt set a plate of eggs in front of each of them, before sitting down herself.

"Well Remus, you certainly look a bit better today." she said cheerfully.

Remus nodded sleepily, trying to wolf down his eggs as fast as possible. He smiled vaguely at his brother sitting across the table. "I can’t believe you came Rom! How’d you get off work?" he said between mouthfuls of egg.

"I’d skip anything to come see you off!" Romulus said happily. "Have you got everything packed?"

Remus nodded, running over a mental list in his head.

"Here," said Rom, "don’t forget this."

Romulus handed Rem his guitar, stored in a battered traveling case. Remus’s jaw dropped and he starred wide-eyed at the case.

"Really Rom?" he said, "I can take it with me? Thank you!"

Romulus grinned, "No problem. At least I’ll know it’s being used and it’s in good hands. Now let’s get this stuff to the car."

Rom began loading the trunk of the family’s muggle car with Remus’s things. After the car was loaded, Remus climbed into the back seat with Vulcan’s cage and Romulus slid in soon there after. Aunt Myrestial and Ms. Lupin took the front seats. Remus could hardly sit still. He was nauseous with excitement, as if he could burst at any second. For once he didn’t notice the shadows around his eyes, or the bones showing in his skinny arms. He didn’t care that his hair was mess, or that his jeans were loose around the waist. All Remus could think about was Hogwarts. As the car rolled down the highway, Remus leaned his head sleepily against the car window and watched the fields roll by. He sat there quietly, dreaming about Hogwarts and the opportunities that awaited him. Just as he was dozing off, Remus realized that his mother was speaking to him.

"…and I’m sure you’ll make lots of new friends and…"

Remus suddenly felt something in his stomach sink. Friends…he’d never had any besides Romulus. He had never attended school. When he was young, he was so weak after transformations that he often caught terrible colds that kept him in bed for days or sometimes weeks. Even now, Remus occasionally awoke from transformations with a high fever and a hacking cough. Remus sighed. Would he ever fit in at Hogwarts? And what would kids like Sirius say when he disappeared each month for a few days?

"Oy, Remus!" a voice said sharply, "we’re here!"

Remus jumped at the sound and turned to see Rom. "Sorry. I was daydreaming…"

"Obviously." Rom said, handing Remus the battered guitar case and Vulcan’s cage. Remus followed his mum, brother, and aunt to the train platform. Remus took the barrier at a run. He knew everything about the Hogwarts Express, as he had been to see Rom off to school numerous times. As Remus fell through the barrier, he ran headlong into another boy. He was a few inches shorter then Remus, with chestnut eyes and a flurry of black hair.

"Oh, sorry." Remus mumbled as he ran off to find Romulus. The minutes flew by and Remus suddenly found himself kissing his family farewell. With a few last guitar pointers from Rom, Remus was dragging his trunk onto the train. He found an empty compartment and collapsed into a seat. In an attempt to calm himself, Remus closed his eyes, and was soon fast asleep.

a/n: All that I ask is for a quick review…even just a "I like that" or "good story". Hope you enjoyed part one! -RavenNat

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