Elspeth: Good, she’s not here yet. Maybe I can make a break –
Jadali: Not likely! SPRUNG! Siddown.
Max: Despite the fact that the general crappiness of this is hurting my head, the purple-haired witch –
Jadali: Mage.
Max: Whatever. Point is, at least she didn’t pick the one with thirty chapters.
Elspeth: *sigh* I suppose you’re right. Let’s get it over with.
Chapter 3: She’s Mine
sorry its sooo short but I couldn't think of anything Zack would say
Jadali: I think our dear author has problems putting words in all the characters’ mouths.
Elspeth: And I fail to see why people get so damn excited about the fact that they have no idea what to write next. It isn’t exciting, it’s pathetic.
ZACK’S P.O.V
Zack: Oh crap.
Harmony just showed up at Jam Pony asking for Max. Should have known the girl would try and find the others because I told her not too.
Jadali: Hey, Zack! I thought you’d know the difference between to, too and two. Apparently not.
Zack: I’d like to reinforce the fact that not only would I never execute the actions attributed to me in this piece of wannabe-literature, I’m not a goddamn moron and I would have seen something like that coming.
Elspeth: And if Zack told her ‘not too,’ who told her ‘not’ in the first place?
Max: *thwack*
Elspeth: (rubbing head) Ow.
Jadali: Thankyou.
But for some reason as soon as Max brought her to me she hugged me. Harmony hugging me ok she’s never done that before well at least not in a very long time makes me notice how I’ve missed her.
Jadali: Please tell me she brought gifts of punctuation and coherency…
Elspeth: I’m thinking not. But at least she got the apostrophe right.
Logan’s asking her something I don’t know what he’s speaking his computer babble like he normally does.
Max: Hey! It’s not all computer babble!
Logan: That’s right!
Jadali: Um, where exactly do you keep popping up from?
Logan: Beats me. I’m only speaking in self-defence.
Jadali: Well, if you’re gonna keep checking up on Max, why don’t the two of you just go now? We’ll call you back for final comments once we’ve finished the story.
Max: YAY! (steps through open portal) See ya, big brother!
Zack: Hey! Can’t I go too?!
Elspeth: Well, since you just proved that you’re nothing like the you of the story by using a correctly structured sentence, one that even incorporates that blasted ‘too’ thing properly, I suppose you’re off the hook as well.
Zack: WOO! (dives headfirst through the portal, which Elspeth promptly closes)
Elspeth: You do realise we’re all alone now, right? With one heck of a scary piece of work?
Jadali: I’m debating the sageness of letting them all leave now as well.
Max isn’t smiling in fact she seems very mad well so am I no one’s getting their hands on any of the X-5’s most of all Harmony she’s mine.
Jadali: I think it’s time we incorporated some commas into this thing: ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
Elspeth: That should bring it almost up-to-date.
Bling is eyeing me with this knowing look on his face that look taunts me it screams ‘your in love with a girl who could pass herself off as a 16 year old’. True she could pass for a 16 year old but only in height and her face, in height she only comes about to my shoulder, in her face she looks angelic all soft but with a hardness that seems like it shouldn’t be there.
Elspeth: Oh dear. Not only is poor Zack possessor of a screwed up psyche, he’s arguing with himself as well.
Jadali: o_O Uh-oh. Split personality thing…
yeah Harmony was his and what he had he cared for no one was taking her no one at all
Jadali: And a random change of voice to completely fool the reader.
Elspeth: Not to mention the lack of a terminator. Again.
Jadali: Ugh. Let’s just move along…
Prize Fool of the Chapter: Should have known the girl would try and find the others because I told her not too.