Elspeth: Maybe if I sneak away when she’s not looking…
Jadali: Hey! El! Guess what I got?
Elspeth: A really bad fanfic you think we should rip to pieces?
Jadali: (confused) How’d ya guess?
Elspeth: -_-* Just get on with it so I can leave…
Jadali: Killjoy.
Elspeth: I try. Um, who’s it by?
Jadali: Allison –
Elspeth: Don’t tell me you actually –
Jadali: Meore!
Elspeth: AARGH! NO WAY!
Jadali: Aw, come on, it’ll be fun.
Elspeth: You say that every time and I wind up scarred for life.
Allison & May - Are they Sayians??
Both: NO.
Elspeth: Oh goody. Not only did you pick a crappy author, you picked a Mary-Sue. Woo.
Chapter One: May and Allison meet Gohan and Trunks
Jadali: I really hope chapter 2 is "May and Allison are eaten by Gohan and Trunks."
May and Allison are walking towards the school building when they herd some girls talking
Both: MOO.
Jadali (girls): Did you, like, hear about that ditzy author?
Elspeth (same): You mean, like, the one writing herself into her stories?
Jadali (same): Yah. I mean, it’s so totally been done. So has the tense change thing. It's so last year.
"Hey did you hear there taking two girls to japan as transfer students, but guess who there taking May and Allison."
Both: Woo.
Elspeth: Uh-oh, we’ve found another ‘there they’re and their’ criminal. Maybe I’ll just blot the rest of them out.
Jadali: Huh?
Elspeth: O-O; Nothing!
As soon as they heard that they started screaming and grabbed ***** cell phones and called home to tell ***** parents and for them to pack ***** luggage cause later on ***** teacher told them they were leaving tonight that day.
Jadali: And as we all know, one frequently leaves at night during the day. Um, what’s under the asterixes?
Elspeth: Never mind.
They finally got to the airport and got on ***** plane.
Jadali: The plane crashed just after take-off, and they both died horrible deaths. Much rejoicing ensued.
Allison looked over at May and asked her "I wander if we'll meet any guys?
Both: -_-*
Jadali: I kinda hope she’ll ‘wander’ off a building…
....I wander if will get to use our fighting power any but do you think any body else is like us?".
Both: -_-**
Jadali: Hopefully not.
May looked over and anwsered "Well I have no clue let's just go to sleep!".
Jadali: I got an idea –
Elspeth: Bullshit.
Jadali: I do. Let’s follow Jadarin’s example and harvest punctuation. We can grow the excess full stops into commas, and sprinkle them randomly over the fic.
Elspeth: Nice idea. But it’s not yours.
Jadali: Shaddap.
They arrived in the morning at Toyko International Airport and took a cab to ***** family house they were staying in. May took out the information on ***** family ***** were staying with and looked at it and had a confused look on her face then looked at Allison and said "It says here that we are staying at Goku's house
Both: o-O;
Jadali: Uh-oh, the corruption has begun.
Elspeth: Why the heck would they want to stay out in the styx, anyway?
but it also says that his family has won many Martial Arts tournaments worldwide!",
Elspeth: (harvests comma for later use)
Then Allison looked at her but had a wide smile on her face and said "I wanna date someone here"
Both: (fall over)
May sat back and sighed and mumbled to herself allison is so boy crazy to bad she always challeges a guy to arm wrestling our a fight before she'll go out with them but the guys always lose then there afraid of her but what am I saying the same thing happens to me.
Elspeth: @-@
Jadali: Whoa, someone missed Basic Sentence Construction in kindergarten.
They arrived at the cottage and paid the cab and went up to the door and knocked on it. All of a sudden the door flung open and Gohan was standing there and said "Dad ***** here.....Whoa know one told me american girls looked this good!" Allison almost fainted
Both: Yup, know just how you feel.
Elspeth: And notice, ladies and gentlemen, the amazing OOC Gohan. Are you sure this ain’t Goten instead?
Jadali: I dunno. And I’m debating the sageness of starting this in the first place.
but stood up when Chi Chi and Goku came to the door and welcomed them.
Jadali (Chichi): Ever been beaten over the head with a frying pan? Go away, you crazy bitches! Don’t make me use it! (pulls out skillet)
Elspeth (Goku): Got anything to eat? No? Then BUG OFF!
Then Chi chi told them "Well may and Allison you'll be going to school tommorow so do we need to get you a translator for school?"
Elspeth: But they’re talking to…
Jadali: (pats head) Don’t worry, I’m scared too.
Then they both perked up and may said "No ma'am me and Allison both speak fluent Japanese and Korean!.. And are highly advancd in martial arts".
Both: Uh-oh… SAS is kicking in…
As soon as may had said that Goku perked up and said "Hmmmmm....... Martial arts huh! Well come on Gohan lets get them training and see if ***** any good"
Jadali (Gohan): Sorry dad, I might catch something. You go with them.
But then chi chi
Elspeth: Okay, that has ceased to be a name and become a slang term I won’t use because I kiss my mother with this mouth.
Jadali: Tut-tut. Thou shalt not decapitalise names.
looked at him and said " No I will not have it not until they go to school tommorow" then Goku mumbeled "but..but" "no buts about it goku". Then chi chi sent them off to bed.
Jadali: Where hopefully they spontaneously combusted.
Elspeth: Hah! Take that, Goku, being sent to bed by your own wife.
The next morning the girls woke up and got dressed. They walked in to the kitchen where they were eating breakfast and Goku spit out his food as soon as he looked at them.
Jadali: Okay, you know you’ve got a problem when you put Goku off breakfast.
Allison was wearing a tube top that had the words bad girl and had on shorts and knee high boots with her hair up in two buns on her head and black ribbons in her hair not to mention that her shorts were shiny leather material.
Jadali: (groan) Uh-oh, it’s a psychotramp crossover with Sorcerer Hunters!
Elspeth (Chocolate): Hey! Gimme back my clothes! (pulls out wire)
May had on a tube top that said bad girl had on a black mini skirt made out of the same shiny material as allison's shorts. Her hair was in two braids with black ribbons in them. Both of the girls had on Dark maroon lipstick and black eyeliner.
Jadali: Great, not only are they tramps, they’re tramps trying to pass for goths.
Elspeth: I can see why Goku feels sick.
They just stared at Goku and finally Allison mumbled "What are you staring at doesn't anyone dress like this?"
Both: Not in public!
Then Gohan came down stairs and acidentally touched Allison's butt and she yelled "You dirty bastard! Youre hentai freak"
Jadali: I thought Zack reading poetry was unlikely…
and punched and kicked him into the wall then they both grabbed ***** lunches and ***** bags and walked out the door.
Both: *sweatdrop*
Elspeth: And I thought they’d be going out ‘that there door.’
Jadali: Where’d that come from?
Elspeth: Uh, never mind.
Then they heard Chi chi out the door "What about your breakfast?" Then may turned around and said "Sorry we don't eat breakfast"!
Elspeth: You apparently don’t do English either.
They got to school and were sat down in seats right next to each other and ***** teacher Mrs.lee told them to come up to the front of the class room to tell them about ***** selves. So May and Allison stumbled up to the front and May started "My name is May I am 13 1/2 years old I am from georgia,Usa I am a champion in Tai Kwon Doe
Jadali (May): I’m so damn good I don’t even have to spell it right!
and have defeated everyone who has gotten In my way of winning" Then she sat down. Then it was allison's turn "Hey waz up? My name is Allison Meore I'm from the same school as may and we are best friends! I am also a martial artist expert and have never been defeated"
Elspeth: (beats Allison over the head, killing her) Now you have. Beware the angry telepath.
Then the teacher half schocked half grinning told them to sit down.
Jadali: I’m rather shocked myself. I wasn’t aware someone could so blatantly abuse the English language.
Later on at recess this kid from the other class walked over to Allison and said "Hey Babe looking PHAT! You wanna get something tonight? Cause I have it all baby!"
Both: _-_;
Allison looked pale and had fire in her eyes but had a smile that when Gohan walked over and noticed her he knew that grin it was Vegetas grin!
Jadali: Uh-oh, enter the long-lost relative…
Elspeth: No-no-no!
She said "Well then I'll take you up on that offer hot stuff"
Both: _o_;
She said as he started walking toward her he touched her butt and started to try to kiss her even though the only other person around was Gohan but she said "Get off hentai bastard I had my fingers cross our was I too fast for you?".
Both: Huh? _-_;
Jadali: We’re spending way too much time unconscious.
Elspeth: Unconsciousness is safe. There’s no Allison or May.
Allison did a flying jump kick and made the guy slam into the wall but Gohan noticed Allison did have a similar appearance to vegeta
Jadali: That’s one UGLY girl.
so he decided to introduce the two of them to vegeta!
Elspeth: Oh god. Kill me now.
Later coming very soon~! Chapter two is next!!!
Both: NNOOOOO!!!
Chapter Two : Meeting with Vegeta and Trunks.
Jadali: (Rifles through previous pages) But I thought they were supposed to meet Trunks last chapter.
Elspeth: True enough, but bear in mind this was also supposed to pass for fiction.
So after school Gohan took May and Allison over to Capsule Corps to introduce
them to Vegeta, Bulma, and Trunks.
Jadali (Vegeta): Begone, worthless author! FINAL FLASH!
Elspeth (Narrator): And as the devastating blast careered into the two foolish girls, Vegeta smirked over the charred remains and congratulated himself on a job well done.
They walked up to the door but Bulma must
Jadali (voice in Bulma’s head): Take the flamethrower, Bulma. Use the flamethrower…
have saw them
Elspeth: Screw the flamethrower, a saw would be much more painful!
coming and flung open the door and grabbed them and yanked them
inside. "Well Gohan I knew one day you would be the lady killer!" Bulma said as she grabbed his butt
Both: STATUTORY RAPE!
Jadali: Hey! That’s my expression!
Elspeth: Bite me.
as she was working on a computer chip for one of her new robot creations that Vegeta could spar against in the Gravity room.
Jadali: Ah, the infamous waste of time that’d be. Vegeta-go-boom, robot-go-die.
Elspeth: ‘Robot-go-die’? That’s it, no more Saccharine Puffs for breakfast.
Jadali: Aww. No fair!
Then Gohan stood up
Elspeth: Um, when was he not standing?
Jadali: Maybe he fell over with a nosebleed when Bulma grabbed his posterior.
and told Bulma they were actually here for the girls to meet
Vegeta and Trunks. So they walked back to the gravity room but in the hall way they saw trunks and May almost fainted and then she mumbled to Allison "Oh my God he is so damn fine" ,
Jadali: (singing) ~So damn fine…~
Elspeth: Shut up before you break something. Like my ears. And it’s nice to see that not only are these two wannabe goths, wannabe Saiyans and wannabe authors, they’re also paedophiles. Come on, getting a happy from a six-year-old is just…
Jadali: Sick?
Elspeth: Precisely.
then Allison just laughed.
Jadali: If I wasn’t so nauseated, I’d probably laugh as well.
Trunks walked over to the girls and then looked at Gohan "hey Gohan I thought I was
the lady killer especially look at these girls as he pointed to Allison and May.
After that little conversation they finally got to the gravity room where Vegeta was
sparring but that didn't last for long.
Vegeta got up walked over there the girls looked at him he was sweaty but they also
looked at his muscles they were huge!Allison was thinking to her self I could take
them on there nothing . "
Elspeth: Cool! Trunks is narrating! Maybe he’ll do a better job than tweedle-dum and tweedle-ridiculous.
Hey Gohan why did you bring such weaklings little pathetic
human girls to me?"
Jadali: I was kinda wondering that myself.
then Allison had fire in her eyes
Elspeth: (sprays Allison with a fire hose) All better.
and went up to Vegeta and stood in his face and Yelled
Jadali: Whoa, a capital. It must be an emphatic ‘Yell’.
"Weakling littke girls huh? Well look here you fucking sweaty ugly bastard I could kick your little ass to hell and back right here and right know!".
Elspeth: ‘Know’? No, I really don’t think you do, dearie.
Jadali: And such language! Is that really necessary? I’m insulted. I haven’t heard such filth since…ever.
Elspeth: My, we’re a prim one today, aren’t we?
Jadali: Oh, go talk to a cat.
Than she had her little grin but vegeta had the same grin on. Gohan mumbled something "This looks like trouble".
Both: That’s what we’ve been saying since this horrible piece-o-crud started.
May looked at Allison then Vegeta and said "Yes vegeta with your power level we could defiantley kick you ass!"
Jadali: Um, defiantly? Ooh, they defy you, oh Lawn-Darty one.
Elspeth: That’s in the running for typo of the year.
Vegeta then said "Fine I challenge you to a fight right here right know!"
Jadali: Know? Know what? I don’t think they know what they’re doing.
Elspeth: Well, duh.
"Fine lets go"
Both: Yay! We’re outta here!
They both jumped up in the air and started fighting Allison was punching blocking and kicking but finally got to the point where she kicked vegeta up in the air then flew up and punched him in the back to the ground then yelled "Ultimate Thunder Blast" and a huge ball of energy came out of her hands that looked like lighting inside a bottle but Vegeta moved out of the way but then Allison redirected the Energy Blast and it hit Vegeta head on and knocked him unconious for 1 hour!
Jadali: And let’s all take a deep breath.
When he woke up he asked how we could have beaten him but we were walking
Jadali: …Off a cliff, hopefully. Or into the path of a Mack truck.
Elspeth: Oh great, a random voice change.
out the door when Trunks grabbed May and asked her "Hey baby come here I wanna talk to you for a couple of hours!" Then May told Allison she would catch up with her later!
Jadali (May): ‘Scuse me! I have to go molest this blissfully ignorant child! We can go stomp on puppies later, okay?
They went to trunks bedroom and he asked her this "Are ya'll sayians?" then May looked away and said "We are we are the Daughters of Your fathers sister Sakura
Both: _-_;
our mother was sent off in a capsule as soon as they knew that Freezia was coming
Jadali: AAH! Attack of the killer flower!
so they sent her off so they would have a line of sayians if Vegeta never survived luckily our Father was Sayian to so that we could have become the strongest fighters ever"
Elspeth: Well, that’s bulldust. Halfbred Saiyans are in general stronger than purebloods.
Trunks looked at her but he didn't care about that she was beautiful he wanted her badly so he reached over and pushed May down and got on top of her and started kissing her and rubbing her back but she took off is shirt and he went to her neck and then with the help of May he took off her shirt and Bra
Jadali: What the hell is Bra doing there?!
Elspeth (Bra): I’m trying to stop the author corrupting my brother, you know, before his seventh birthday?
Jadali: *sigh* Another author tries to molest Trunks. Poor child, he’ll wind up in therapy.
Elspeth (Trunks): My name is Trunks, and I was sexually abused by an author.
Jadali (Marron, Carrot, Vash, Gundam pilots, etc.): Hi, Trunks.
and he got to her boobs but then all of a sudden he heard his mother coming down the hall way "Trunks honey come on dinner is ready" and she moved in for the door but May had quickly got dressed and got out of the window and past the road and started running toward Goku's house.
Elspeth: Let’s hope she keeps on running, far away, never to be seen again.
But over at Gohan's house things were different Allison liked Gohan a lot but she had things happen in her past! But they were in his bedroom on the floor and he was kissing her neck and he was on top of her but than she said "Gohan no I don't want to please no!~"
Jadali: Allow me to rephrase that. Gohan: "No! I don’t want to! Please, no!"
Elspeth: That’s better.
Jadali: And I’d also like to point out that this is highly illegal. Ever hear the expression, ‘take thirteen and you’ll get twenty’?
But Gohan with strained her and forced her hands down and took off her shirt and bra and kissed her then took off his pants and boxers and Raped her.
Both: Probably shouldn’t make fun of this, but still: Yeah, right. This is really going to happen.
Elspeth: Especially since she could beat up Vegeta.
Allison looked blankly after it was all over she looked at Gohan and said "I know, I know I won't tell a soul cause you'll kill me"
Both: We’ll kill you here and now, if you like.
Chapter 3 Allison's past
Jadali: I’ll be considerate and break the paragraph for the witless wonder.
She went to her room and started to look at her ankles she had so many scars but she again took out her razor and cut her ankles
Elspeth: Isn’t it customary to slash one’s wrists?
she remembered when just a couple of
months ago she was raped by a class mate and then mocked by friends!
Jadali: But I thought she was a super-strong pureblooded Saiyan? Wouldn’t that equal, ‘touch me and I’ll kick nine colours of crap out-o-you’?
Allison started screaming "Why me? Why me? Why won't these people ever just leave
me alone!"
Elspeth: That’s what I’ve been saying the entire time I’ve been roped into this.
But instead of Chi Chi our Goku running in may ran in and looked at Allison's Bloody
ankles and said "Oh dear God Allison what happened?" Allison looked up at May with makeup stained teary eyes and said "Nothing happened! I just want to die!"
Elspeth: Me too! GET ME OUT OF HERE!
Jadali: Settle down, or I’ll pull out that thirty-chapter long Dark Angel fic.
Elspeth: (gulp) Yes’m.
Then May remembered last time Allison was like this it was 4 months ago when she was raped!
"Oh god Allison you were raped"
Jadali: Startling observation.
Elspeth: Maybe she added it in case we missed the narrative.
May said then when Allison didn't respond she
went over and hugged her and started crying.
Both: We’re crying too. This is just painful.
Jadali: And too bad, I still don’t feel sorry for you.
The end!!!!!!!!!!
Both: YAY!
Girls history
Both: NOOO!
Allison Meore age: 14 Grade: 8th Has brown hair and eyes
Jadali: And no writing skills whatsoever.
She has huge amount of power since she is the princess sayian
Both: _-_;
along with her friend may who both were adopted but actually sisterd!
Elspeth: Sisterd? That sounds painful.
She was raped 4 months ago by a class mate.
May lee age:14 grade:8th has brown hair and eyes also has a huge amount of power and she is a princess sayian
Both: *sigh* Here we go again. _-_;
Allison's best friend but ***** actually sisters adopted
Have had a lot of bad relationships with boys in the past and is in love with Trunks
Jadali: Child molester.
Elspeth: So, that’s it?
Jadali: Yup, in all it’s plotless glory.
Elspeth: Promise me you’ll never pull up another Allison fic.
Jadali: You have my word on that, it’s far too painful.
Elspeth: Let’s go find something less scary to read.
Jadali: Okay! (skips off in relief)
Stinger: "Yes vegeta with your power level we could defiantley kick you ass!"