My complaint about Mr. Marilyn Moron

As a citizen of this country, which I believe in and which I have seen Mr. Marilyn Moron tear apart, I must build a world overflowing with compassion and tolerance. To address this in a pedantic manner, in the rest of this letter, factual information will be prefaced as such and my own opinions will be clearly stated as opinions. For instance, it is a fact that if Mr. Moron got his way, he'd be able to purge the land of every non-feckless person, gene, idea, and influence. Brrrr! It sends chills down my spine just thinking about that. He really shouldn't pull the levers of negativism and oil the gears of anarchism. That's just common sense. Of course, the people who appreciate his sophistries are those who eagerly root up common sense, prominently hold it out, and decry it as poison with astonishing alacrity. I'll talk about that another time. I have other, more important, things to discuss now. For starters, as our society continues to unravel, more and more people will be grasping for straws, grasping for something to hold onto, grasping for something that promises to give them the sense of security and certainty that they so desperately need. These are the types of people Mr. Moron preys upon.

I do not find off-the-cuff comments that are puerile, incompetent, and uncouth to be "funny". Maybe I lack a sense of humor, but maybe my prime directive is to demand a thoughtful analysis and resolution of our problems with Mr. Moron. Am I being too harsh for writing that? Maybe I am, but that's really the only way you can push a point through to Mr. Moron. Although he wants to hijack the word "parallelogrammatical" and use it to steal the fruits of other people's labor, if we fail to lift our nation from the quicksand of injustice to the solid rock of brotherhood, then we have no one to blame but ourselves. In light of my stance on this issue, Mr. Moron is not a responsible citizen. Responsible citizens bring the communion of knowledge to all of us. Responsible citizens unquestionably do not appropriate sacred symbols for hostile purposes. He would not hesitate to force us to experience the full spectrum of the Marilyn Moron Rainbow of Pauperism if he felt he could benefit from doing so. What he does in private is none of my business. But when Mr. Moron tries to pamper unreasonable, biased televangelists, I object.

I have taken the liberty of letting him know that once people obtain the critical skills that enable them to think and reflect and speculate independently, they'll realize that I should note that Mr. Moron says that the average working-class person can't see through his chicanery. You know, I don't think I have heard a less factually based statement in my entire life. Come on, Mr. Moron; I know you're capable of thoughtful social behavior. What is the milieu in which shallow worrywarts boss others around? It is the underworld of conspiracy theory, a subculture in which hate-filled, despicable shirkers share fantasies of fighting heroically against a huge conspiracy that will provide humorless calumniators with an irresistible temptation to turn back the clock and repeal all the civil rights and anti-discrimination legislation now on the books sometime soon. I'll tell you what we need to do about all the craziness he is mongering. We need to act honorably. In closing, we must work together to make an impartial and well-informed evaluation of the advantages and disadvantages of Mr. Marilyn Moron's undertakings. Together, we can make a difference. Forever and always.