Artificial Assailants
Lets say you are enjoying a quiet evening of foul experiments in dark sorcery & Necromancy at home, not dissimilar to the Reverend Jesse Jackson.
You decide to stand near a door and are surprised by a SYNTHETIC SOLDIER!!!!!
What do you do?
1. Here we see a young human female struggling with a duplicant attacker. Note it's gaping maw. Its gaping maw is it's most deadly weapon. Look as it commences with it's fierce mouthing assault.
2. These are THE ONLY weak points on Synthoids & Duplicants. Study them.
3. If possible, get behind the Synthoid and clasp your hands over one of the weak points. Commence a squeezing attack. Duplicants and Synthoids are extremely durable and can absorb great punishment, so you may have to do this again and again. 
4. This may take a while, so to hasten your enemy’s malfunction you may wish to chin-butt the little artificial bastard on the head. Note its face. Do not be fooled, while they appear expressionless they are, in fact, full of rage. Note how it attempts to Karate-Chop the Female's left arm. Behold the Synthoid's enraged state. 
5. After softening your opponent up slam it to the ground by the lower "lip" (actually part of the "Omni-mountable-multi-orifice"). Force the eyes to be open and attempt to dominate the duplicant through Machine Empathy and Mesmerism.
6. Swallow your opponent's head.
7. Regurgitate your adversary's head and commence with repeated dual-handed "push-of-death" blows to weak point #1.
8. Pinch the Omni-mountable-multi-orifice a second time.
9. Drive your finger into the gaping maw. Attempt to poke the CPU or- if at all possible- the "Hate-Box" thus dislodging one or the other or, if possible, both. The "Hate-Box" is the Duplicant/Synthoid locus of cruelty. Poking it makes it itchy.
10. Swallow your opponent’s head again. Exhale and inhale strongly in an attempt to inflate and deflate the Synthoid. Repeated inflation/deflation confuses and harms Synthoids greatly, it also serves to drive the CPU and/or "Hate-Box" into the "throat" (actually a neck emulator).
11. Slap the Duplicant on the forehead and chi-strike the neck emulator in an attempt to damage the now-dislodged CPU and/or "Hate-Box". This will subdue the opponent. 
12. Call Spain and tell them their assassin failed. Taunt and mock them. Tell them they are weak. Tell them they are foolish for threatening you. Say you have been trained by the Buttphish. Tell them you know where their Armada is. These last two statements will both enrage and frighten them.
13. Now you may devour your fallen foe. Note the twitching of the torso. This is caused by the "pain emulators" going wild. This means that the Synthoid will soon "die".
RETURN TO MAIN