Heart's Desire
Mood:  hug me
To have eyes which make you want to lose yourself in.
To have a smile that makes you want to lose your heart to.
To have a heart that makes you want to share yours with.
To have a body that makes you want to hold and never let go.


To have a soul that makes you want to die for.

Where do dreams go?
Mood:  spacey
When do you lose your dreams?

For as long as I can remember I wanted to be a pilot, well I actually wanted to be a bird, to roam the skies and go where I wanted. To feel the wind around me and fly off into the distance.

So, as I couldn't be a bird the next best thing would be to fly a plane, to be up in the clouds with nothing but fresh skies and vast open space around me.

As I got a little older I developed the need for speed and flying any plane was no longer my dream but to fly a fighter plane - to have the speed and power at my fingertips was what I wanted.

But I was then told women could not fly the fighter planes - thud down to earth I come. So whilst I sat and thought about flying and amending my dream I went to college and got a job - a desk job.

I still have a desk job. I look around me and I'm caged in a building for 8 hours a day. I don't know when I lost touch with my dream but now it seems as far away as the bird I once wanted to be.

Shattered Heart
Mood:  don't ask
To have your heart broken once it hurts.
You mourn the pain and grieve until the pieces find their way whole again.

To have your heart broken a second time it hurts.
You mourn the pain and relive the first heartbreak all over again.
The broken pieces break again as the familiarity of the pain comes back.
Your broken heart takes longer to heal, but eventually it molds back into one but more delicate and fragile then glass.

For years your heart is encased in steel, no love can get through, your heart is beating but cold. Still fragile but growing in strength each day eventually breaking down the steel wall.

The final straw.
Your heart is broken once more.
The memories come flooding back and it shatters.
To mend this heart will take time, its up, its beating and behind the steel but its not whole, shattered pieces are harder to find, some may be lost forever.