today was a good day. and right now i feel all warm and fuzzy inside. when i walked home from the bus, it was a little bit cloudy but mostly sunny. it was warm-ish and felt so...fall-y. you know? there's that certain time of year that just reminds me of pumpkins + trick or treating + starting school. today i got that feeling...it was nice. is nice. i still have it.
as i already said, today was a good day. in PE i'm now doing basketball, i'm terrible. my team's pretty cool though. basketball is the devil's sport...lol. i haven't been staring @ my crush in english anymore...ehh i'm so undecided about everything. everything concerning guys, anyway. i want to go out with someone. i really do. never having had a boyfriend is not a nice feeling, believe me. you don't need to go try and experience singledom. it's not particularly lovely.
but then on the other hand, i don't want to be tied down to someone. i don't want to feel like i am always going to have to hang out with them, and vice versa. it would be nice to have someone to hang out with all the time, but i might get tired of it. i wouldn't have the freedom that i have...but that could be a good thing. and then also, there's my family. they're so...weird. so in some ways i'd rather wait until college to have a boyfriend, so he just knows me, and doesn't know my mom or brother and can't see old pics of me and listen to old stories about me.
ahh but see? i'm just ASSUMING that's what would happen if i had a boyfriend! and i am never fucking going to GET a boyfriend, so there's no use assuming it! grr, guys are confusing. my friend described it nicely: "i hate guys. i'm not a lesbian, i just hate guys."--amelia. yeah, guys are the devil. and since basketball is the devil's sport, basketball is a guys sport. the guys sport? i don't know. anyhow.
aside from today, life has been pretty much crap. same old same old...i got a 94% on my chemistry test though. i'm sure you don't care, but i do. actually i somewhat don't, i'd rather be talking about all the parties i'm going to this weekend and how fun life is and all my wonderful friends. but as i say too much: "oh well...i'll get over it."
well, i think i'm going to go now. nothing else to say, sorry. will you email me? my inbox is lonely. click here.
when i see you i want to hold you till the end of time
