That, to this day was the toughest thing I’ve ever gone through, not only emotionally but physically as well. During the three years that Tay had left, I lost 20 pounds, weighting in at 98 pounds. I was 5’6 in height and very unhealthy. Tay was there every step of the way. He saw me through my illness. I never went to a mental institution for attempting suicide. There was no need to, Taylor was back and so was my soul. Taylor has kept his promise and has given me everything that I had dreamed that the perfect guy would have. My delusions of a perfect guy had almost killed me. Taylor, if he had been any less of a lover than he was five years ago, he still would have been the perfect guy. I blinded myself from seeing it. Whether or not it was I that had been afraid of commitment. By looking for insignificant flaws it justified my reasoning for not giving myself fully to him. I wouldn’t have realized it back then. I was too proud to. Taylor had always been perfect, no matter what I may have thought. Look where he’s gotten me. I now weight my normal 120. We’re married now and have two kids. Both are boys. Mathew is 2 and Jacob is 3 months. With out Taylor, I wouldn’t be here telling you this. If you happen to be reading this and are going through something similar or through something tough, don’t give up hope and don’t repress your feelings. Your feelings are the closest things to reality. Without them, what have you got to live for? So hang on to them. Be strong and don’t ever dwell on your losses. Do something about them. Don’t shut them out. That was my mistake. Not everyone is going to be as lucky as I was. Don’t ever let someone make you feel like you’re not worth living for.. There’s always someone who won’t be able to go on without you. You’re mission in life is to find them, don’t be picky and don’t be hasty. One day you’ll realize that there are some things, there or not is worth living for.