I awoke to a quiet morning. Flashes of my dream from the previous night appeard in my mind, for my sleep was not dreamless...

I could remember seeing Azura's face. Her eyes were open and expressionless. Then a shot of her further away laying in a stretcher in a white room. I could only see her body, but the heart-monitor flat-lining was heard loud and clear.

This was a fear I had long had since she went away. I didn't know where she was going, but I remember her saying she wasn't coming back, and she couldn't stay. Please don't forget me...

I couldn't see her off. the pain would've been too great for me. I stayed in my bed for days after she left, and I cried, for I knew I would never see her again, though hope of it still lingers in my heart even to this day.

I'd wait for a call or letter from her, telling me how she's been, but I got nothing, and so I started to worry, and started having dreams of her dying. I never knew how she died in my dreams. I could never seem to remember that part; but I always saw her in a hospital bed, and the heart monitor was flat-lining.

Actually, come to think of it, all of the dreams started since the day she left, not when I didn't receive a call or letter from her. They've never stopped for more than a few days without starting again. That was a year ago - the day, or night, rather, that we graduated from hight school... we loved eachother dearly, and only for a year.

I sat up in my bed and rubbed my eyes. The brown wall of my room with its one window slowly came into focus. Rays of light were shining through, only able to be seen by the dust particles caught in the slight draft from the open door of my bedroom that lead to the living room.

I moved into this place a coulple of months after graduation. My parents forced me out when I wouldn't get out of bed since Azura went away. I managed to unpack my things, but I haven't seriously cleaned once since I got here. Yeah, I did the occasional pick-the-clothes-up-off-the-floor-and-put-your-dirty-dishes-into-the-sink, but that was about it.

Dust was colecting on everything in the house but the dishes, the food, my clothes, and my bed and couch. My parents haven't visited since I moved in... at least I don't think so. The meeting could've beed so unpleasant I forgot it... but my parents weren't so unpleasant in the least...

And anyway, if they did visit my apartment it would've been clean. My mother always liked to keep things tidy.

I went to my living room, which was pretty much just a big room right out of the door from my room. To the left of my door was a door to another room that I have never gone into, and right next to that was the bathroom. I don't know why I had two bedrooms... I just did.

My kitchen was included in the living room. The only thing that really separated the kitchen from the living room was the fact that a small section of floor, which was the kitchen, was dedicated to tile, while the rest was carpet.

A slight chill taunted my senses as I opened the refrigerator. I gripped two eggs in my hand and motioned for the counter. One slipped before I got there. I cursed at myself.

Placing the remaining egg on the counter, I grabbed a paper napkin and wet it. I rung the excess water and began cleaning up the spill.

When I went to grab another egg, I noticed there was just two left. "Shit." I cursed again. Shopping was something I hated to do.

I felt so clumsy for a long while. I dropped the spatula while cooking my eggs, bumbed into corners, stubbed my foot on the carpet and tripped... why was I this way?

Wait... I know why. Each time I dropped or ran into something, I was distracted by the sound of Azura's voice... It sounded angry.

When I dropped the egg I heard her shout, "You're worthless, Irah! Stay away from me!"

When I tripped, "You shut the fuck up, Irah! Shut up! I don't want to hear it!"

But although her voice sounded angry, I could hear sorrow, a kind of dissapointment, behind it... why was she mad? I don't remember doing anything... I don't even remember this fight.

I went and sat on the couch: elbows on my knees, face between my knuckles, hands in fists... my eyelids dropped and I sat there, waiting for some image of my real past to flash - an image I could look further into.

I waited and waited, but I could only hear Azura's voice. It was muffled at first, but it became clearer by the minute. They say a pictures is worth a thousand words, but I think the tome of your voice on even one word says more than a picture.

And that was all I received within a half of an hour of sitting.