I've had a revalation tonight.
"It doesn't f*cking matter. Nothing f*cking matters." Whatever you do whatever you say "it doesn't matter!" because your not going to change anybody's mind, you can't say or do anything that's going to make a real difference to anyone but you. You can talk and yell and scream till your red in the face and out of breath, but it doesn't matter. the only person you can influence is you. anybody else you reach is just a bonus.
"Yeah somebody got what I was trying to say" I say. So what? nobody listens to the nice guy anymore. this ain't the same world our parents lived in, everythings f*cked up now. Well you know what I'm sick and f*cking tired of being the nice guy, I'm tired of finishing last. From now on I'm going to say what's on my mind, I'm going to tell people what I think, solicited or not. If I don't like something or someone I'm going to say it. Why? Because I can, because I SHOULD!! my knuckles are bloody from punchingwalls and other inanimate objects because I think about how f*cked up everything and everybody is and it pisses me off, especially because everyone accepts it, and thats what pisses me off most. Everyone's like "Well, that's the way the world is!" But its not! if you don't let it be. Jeez I'm so f*ckin angry. Angry at myself for believing in the whitewashed bullsh*t that American society is force feeding me. Angry that I took it sitting down without even wondering who decides all this sh*t that we should be feeling and or thinking. You know the average American goes to school for 12 yeas, and everybody; parents, teachers, counselors,T.V, Radio, everybody tells you what to do, what's right. Until you get out, then your supposed to figure it out on your own. That's like if your in math class and the teacher saying "Well here's the paper, now you gotta figure out the problem and the answer to everything in the book! What! What the f*ck!! I'm done, I'm done thinking about other people. nobody thinks abouut me. anybody else anymore, they're too preoccupied with themselves, to care about anyone else. So I say f*ck it. I'm done too. Why not. Why not conform. At first I was loud and boystrous, but then I realized beside my dog no one else was here, no one can hear me. That's why I wrote it down, because no one can hear me and it's easier that way.
The way I see it is like this "say you got like half a beer chillin by the window and your makin your bed when you knock it over on your bedand your like "F*ck", so you rip the sheet of your bed reel fast knowing It ain't gonna help but you keep doing it anyway. You keep on rubbing, but it's still wetand it sure as hell ain't gonna go away. It relates because no matter what you say or do nothing is going to be different. Do you think your politicians listen to what you have to say. Hell no! Yeah they here you, but they're not listening to you. they going to keep doing what they're doing, Throwing they're vote to the highest bidder, who in the instance is represented by Lobbyists. And everything you said is forgotten and wiped away the sweat from the meaningless handshake you shared. I hate politicians for a similar reason that I hate "Frat Boys". In general "Frat Boys" (to me you don't necissarily have to be in a frat to be a "Frat Boy" it refers to a way of thinking, and by saying this I don't mean all frat boys are of the opinion that they are better than everybody else. How is that similar to politicians? Well, after they're elected they get the "Frat Boy" type attitude that they're opinnion is the only one worth listening to. So F*ck the millions of people making it day by day, who have opinions and ideas just like they do. Now politicians, thats just one piece of the Picasso painting of a f*cked up world that we live in next stop Big Business, namely CEO's, and the such.
I think, or at least I thought once, that the kind of person you are is the same kind of people that you attract.If your a good person then good people will be drawn to you, If your an a**hole what you'll get is assholes. Take cristians for example, how many do you see hangin out with people of a more unscrupulous nature. Now look at people who are more so on the darker side of good and evil. Who are they most associate with?
By: Will
