They remind me of childhood memories

When everything was as fresh as the bright blue sky

And now I know when I see his face

That it takes me away to that special place

And if I stay too long I'll probably break down and cry

Oooooooohhhhh ooohhh

Sweet Child of Mine~

"And in conclusion I just wanna thank Nita for everything she's done for the wrestlers - including giving me permission to date the most amazing woman in the world. And while I'm on the topic, a big thank you to Kane for not killing me."

We all laughed and Kane ducked his head in embarrassment, but I knew he was secretly pleased. Test hugged me as he sat down and Lexi grinned at me evilly. "Mom wants to talk."

"Oh shit!" I hid my face as my older sister stood up.

"Many have asked, few have been told. How did I get the name Bliss? Well as you may have gathered by now, this family likes unconventional names. My real name is our mother's maiden name which Bayliss." I smirked as the teasing and laughter started. Bliss gritted her teeth and muttered 'I can't believe I'm being teased about my name by people who refer to themselves as 'The Ayatollah of Rock and Rolla' and 'The Most Electrifying Man in Sports Entertainment' for Christ's sake."

"Any way" she continued, " As a kid, Nita couldn't pronounce Bayliss, instead she said 'Bliss' I liked that a lot more than Bayliss and it stuck. End of story. Nita, cut you cake and make a short speech so we can start on the free booze."

"Hear, hear!" shouted Roaddogg. ~Oh God, please don't let anyone get drunk and ruin this for me!~ I hadn't had a birthday party in a long, long time - far too many painful memories. I stood up.

"Now we all know that nobody is really interested in what I have to say, so I'll make it short. Thank you all for showing up, thank you to Vince for the free booze, thank you to whoever the hell it was who recommended me to Vince, cause I love this job. Thank you to Test, for taking care of Lexi - that original threat still stands by the way - but whenever I see you two together, I get a gushy feeling in the pit of my stomach. Thank you to Lexi, just for being my niece, you've made a lot of things worthwhile when I'd previously given up on them. I love you kiddo, don't you ever forget that. Special thank you for my baby. Kane I know that sometimes I get so caught up in my work, you wonder if there's someone else. There isn't and there never will be. Kane, you make everything perfect, you are everything to me and I don't know what I'd do without you in my life. I love you so much that sometimes it scares me. And lastly, Bliss. I know I haven't always been the best little sister in the world, but you have always helped me out when I needed you and I am will be eternally grateful. I owe you so much and I don't where to begin to repay you. End of speech, let's drink."

~~~~~~~

I looked around the room from my vantage point on Kane's lap. Test and Lexi were sitting close, talking quietly, the Brat Pack and DX were playing some kind of drinking game and Bliss was talking to Steve Austin and Debra. Everyone else had either vanished or was out on the dance floor.

I closed my eyes and remembered the last time I'd celebrated my birthday. I could still visualize it, his clear green eyes, the black hair and shy grin. The party itself was fine, it was what happened afterwards. My friends and I were a fairly wild mob, and it's a miracle that what happened, only happened once and that nothing worse occurred. We'd gotten into a nightclub, and each of us had hooked up with a guy several years older than us.

Michael. I could still remember his name, along with his pick up lines, black combi van, the red shirt and black pants he was wearing at the time. Nothing from that night will ever be erased from my memory, no matter how I try. As I delve further into my memory, I can hear his scornful laugh, feel his hand gripping my wrists and -

"Oh god." I slipped of Kane's lap and ran for the bathroom, not noticing the puzzled stares of the guests. I throw open the door and without bothering to shut it, lost my tea, my lunch, breakfast and the Burger King I'd gotten around midnight last night. It all came up and when I had finished, I curled up in the corner and shook violently, tears streaming down my face.

~What the hell is happening to me?~ I'd been able to think of it without reacting this for years, why now? I listened to the sounds of the party, and knew that unless Kane came in here, nobody would come looking for me until Bliss gave the word. Fifteen years my elder, she knew me like a book and would understand that I needed some time alone.

As I listened to the party, I realized I wasn't alone, as I had previously thought. Someone else was in here, and that someone was also crying. Forgetting my own problems, I got up and looked out. There she was, huddled up under the sink, looking far different from the character she plays on TV. Her make up was running, her hair was matted and her usually impeccable clothing was looking a little grotty. I sat next to her and pulled her into my arms. "What on Earth can be so bad?"

"Oh god, Nita." She sobbed, looking up at me. I could see the confusion, terror, pain and anger in her eyes. I recognized the combination - I'd seen only once before, but that had been when I'd looked in the mirror and it was a look of desperation I could never. "Nita, I'm pregnant."

Terri sat in my office, going through tissues by the handful. "Its not that I don’t want any more children, but I didn’t want one within the year! I have my career and I’m quite happy with that right now. I thought maybe in a few years, when my contract runs out, then I just won’t renew it, meet a nice guy and settle down. But not now!"

"Terri, who is the father?" I asked carefully. She burst into tears again. "I don’t know for certain!"

I cringed. It could be anyone’s child, bar Jesse and Billy. I thanked my guardian angel that at least I could cross those two off the list for certain. "You have three options. Abortion, adoption or keep the child. It’s a hard decision and whatever choice you make will be hard. But I will help you through this and I will support you 100% on whatever decision you make."

"What would you do?"

"This isn’t about me. What would be right for me if I was in your position or right now is not necessarily what’s right for you." I managed to tell her before I began wondering about my words. Had I done what was right in the past? It certainly seemed like the right thing to do at the time.

"Nita, I know can come across as a real prima donna, but I really don’t care about any of the stuff that I claim is so important. I don’t care about the physical side effects of giving birth. What worries me is that I have a new life growing inside me and I don’t know anything about being a mother! I don’t know if I can even keep this baby. I mean, I could decide to keep it, but then end up regretting giving all this up. I could give the child up for adoption and spend the rest of my life wondering what he or she is like. I couldn’t have an abortion, I just couldn’t do it." Terri explained.

"Believe me, I know where you’re coming from." I told her, trying not to sound bitter. I leaned forwards, prepared to say something then thought better of it. I didn’t know if I could trust Terri not to say anything and I wanted to tell Kane myself before word got around.

As soon as Terri was out of there, I called Kane. "Hon, I need to talk to you. It’s fairly important."

As soon as he came in, I locked the door and sat opposite him. "I have to tell you something. I think it’s better that I tell you this straight out and that you hear it from me, not anyone else."

"When I was between 12 –14 I was a fairly wild kid. The night of my 14^th birthday, my friends and I used fake ID’s to get into a night club. I met a guy there, I lead him on a little and he raped me. Six weeks later, a blood test that was taken for a completely different reason showed that I was pregnant." I blurted out before I chickened out. I looked at his face and hurriedly continued. "The child was a result of the rape. I couldn’t go through with an abortion and parental pressure forced me to give the baby, a little girl, up for adoption."

"Yo Maxwell." A multi coloured head poked through the door. "Can I come in?"

"Sure thing Jeffery. And bring the others, that way they won't have to eavesdrop." I replied listlessly. It had been three days since my confession to Kane, and in those three days he hadn't spoken to me, or looked at me. Basically he refused to acknowledge my existence. I wasn't constantly on the verge of tears, I wasn't unhappy, I wasn't angry - I was numb. I'd cancelled all my appointments except for DX and Eddie - they were in need of therapy after the whole Chyna thing. I just didn't want to listen to anyone else's problems; I needed to sort out my own first.

"Nita, what's wrong?" Val asked gently as he, Edge, Christian, Test, Jericho, Matt & Jeff, Scottie and the Grandmasta all shuffled in. I had a great deal of affection for these young men and loved them like brothers. I sighed. "Nothing."

"Don't 'nothing' me kiddo, you look like shit. Now what's wrong?" Scottie asked. "Kane's not having an affair with the Big Show is he? Cause if he is then I have to pash one of the Radicals next time I wrestle one of them."

"Kane's not having an affair with the Big Show." I refused to rise to the bait. The Brats looked at each other. Test tried to get a reaction. "I've broken up with Lexi. She's gonna have my baby and I don't want to face the responsibility."

"Well then, take it from me, your missing out on one of the best experiences of your life, which by the way, is probably going to end soon." I replied flatly. ~Shit, I'm not reacting to anything. This is serious.~ I brought my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around my legs. My hands were clammy and shaking.

I couldn't stop thinking about my baby girl. What I hadn't told Kane was that she'd been adopted by someone I knew and through that person I had been kept up to date on her. It hadn't bothered me a lot until now, and I suspected that Terri's unexpected pregnancy had set it off. Now, all I could think of was how I'd been deprived of the greatest gift a woman could have. I know that if I'd kept my daughter then I wouldn't be where I was now, but I couldn't help thinking of all I'd missed.

I sighed again. Everything hit at once - putting everyone else's emotional health and problems ahead of my own, Kane, the rape and adoption plus everything else - and the floor rushed up to meet me.

~~~~~~~

"Christ, is she ok?"

"Nita's gonna be fine."

"Are you sure?"

"Are there any family members here?"

"I'm her sister."

"Then can I ask you a few questions? Elsewhere?"

"Sure."

"Mom can I come with you?"

"No Lexi. Not this time. Test?"

"No prob Bliss. Lexi, stay here. Keep me company. God knows Nita's not gonna be saying much."

"Not funny."

"Actually it was Lexi."

"Where's Kane? Does he know?"

"No idea. He and Nita have had a falling out."

The voices sounded fuzzy. I struggled to open an eye. Lexi and Test stood together, watching me carefully. I smiled weakly, then closed my eye again. I HATE seeing double. "So kids, what's new?"

"Nita are you ok?"

"I'm fine baby."

"See? I told you!"

Ahh.. Young love. I sat up carefully as Bliss came bustling back into the room. "Alexis, Test, get out. This is serious."

Alexis? Bliss never called Lexi that. This was serious. I looked at my older sister in concern. "Out with it missy."

"What are things like with you and Kane right now? Are you fighting? Are they ok?"

"I'd say we were fighting, but we have to be talking to be fighting. Why?"

"God, sis, I don't know how to say it. You're pregnant."

The announcement brought me back to life. I left Kane a note saying, "We need to talk. That means both of us. Together. In the same room. Conversing. With out fighting."

The only person who knew about my pregnancy so far was Bliss. To the best of my knowledge, she hadn't told Lexi, which was good because Lexi would tell Test, who would tell Edge who would tell Christian, who would... you get the idea.

I was in my office, planning the next nine months carefully. I didn't want to give birth while everyone was doing a promo appearance, or in the middle of a PPV. I had two alternate plans, one for if Kane and I sorted things out and one for if we didn't. I prayed that it would be the former.

I looked up as Kane knocked nervously on the open door. Smiling I beckoned him in, getting up and locking the door behind me. Nothing short of death was going to stop me from this little chat. But before I could speak, Kane started talking.

"Nita, I'm sorry I reacted like that. It had nothing to do with you, I was just shocked. I know that everyone has demons from the past whether they are big or small and whether they admit it or not. What you've had to deal with is a fairly big thing and you seem to have gotten through it very well. Rape is no small thing and neither is being a mother a fourteen, then being forced to give up that child. We all go through trials and tests and it is how we handle them that paves the way for pretty much the rest of our lives. You ended up doing something positive." He bowed his head and looked at the floor. "Anyway I'm sorry for being so insensitive."

I sat on the opposite end of the couch to Kane, smiling as he repositioned himself so his head was resting on my legs. I gently stroked his hair for a few minutes, before saying anything. "Kane, having to give up my little girl was one of the hardest things I ever had to do. That was the reason I became a shrink. I had the most incredible counsellor in the fact that she was there for me between the time Michael raped me and for about six months after my little girl was adopted. The only problem was, during the night I would wake up and hear a baby crying. I had nightmares. And Shanee was only available office hours."

"I was fine during office hours, but in the dead of the night, I needed a shoulder to cry on, someone to reassure me. So I decided that I would become a psychiatrist and be available 24/7 for my clients. That's why I've never complained about getting called in the middle of the night. Because I know, just as much as anyone else, that during the day, things seem fine, but it's in the dead of the night that your inner demons hide in the shadows."

We sat there for a while longer. My beeper was going, but I ignored it. Damnit, this was time for me to sort out my own problems and the rest of the world can go take an aerial act of intercourse for all I cared right then.

"Juanita, I have to tell you something."

"What is it?" I felt a knot of fear begin to tie up my stomach.

"I think that we should take a break. It's just... I've been so used to being alone, and I love you and I love spending time with you, but I just need some time for me. I still want to spend time with you and I still love you and I pray that when I get tired of being alone you'll take me back."

"Oh...." I felt like I'd been hit with a ton of bricks. Kane sat up and pulled me against him. "Please, please understand, It's not you. It's just my emotional hang-ups. I'm so used to being alone that I'm beginning to crave it. If I don't have some alone time, then I may end up resenting you. God knows I don't want that to happen."

"Oh." I repeated, feeling numb. I got up to leave, but Kane hadn't finished. "Nita, why wasn't I called when you passed out and put in hospital?"

"I don't know. All I remember is being questioned by the Brat Pack on what was wrong, then waking up to hear Bliss, Lexi and Test arguing." I replied. Kane snickered a little and I could tell he was grinning under the mask. I knew exactly what the next question would be and I wasn't wrong. "So, are you just not taking proper care of yourself again or is something seriously wrong?"

"A little from column A, a little from column B. I need to take better care of myself as always. Nothing is wrong, but it is fairly serious." I took a deep breath. "Kane, I'm pregnant."

"WHAT?"

"I'm going to have a baby. Your baby." I began to feel nervous. I'd never thought about Kane not being happy about this. I closed my eyes and turned away. "I've made my decision. I'm keeping the baby. I don't believe in abortion and another adoption would kill me. You can support me, completely ditch me or whatever the hell you choose. It's up to you and I won't try to change your mind. Just don't try to change mine. I'm not saying this as attempt to get you to change your mind about the break, or anything like that."

"Nita, I'm not going to try to change your mind. God, you know how I feel about having children. I promise, I will help you through everything and give you my full support. And thank you so much for understanding."

I smiled sadly at him. He hugged me tight, told me to take care of myself, and left.

"Well Terri, have you made a decision yet?" I asked. The bottle blond shook her head. "I don't know what I'm gonna do."

"How far along are you?"

"Ten weeks." she replied. Ten weeks. That was two weeks ahead of me.

"Well an abortion is usually performed before the twelfth week, so if you put off making a decision much longer, you may only have two choices left." I warned her gently. Terri nodded. "I know."

"Have you any idea as to who the father is?" I was getting tired of going over the same ground each day. I knew it was a tough time for her, but I couldn't help her unless she helped herself. Terri sighed. "Nita, I know exactly who the father is. But I told him I was on the Pill and now he's gonna think I lied to him!"

"Terri, are you on the Pill?"

"Of course!" she sounded insulted. I sighed. "Well the Pill isn't 100% reliable. Please tell me, who's the father? Because he has a right to know. And he may want to help you make a decision."

"He won't wanna know."

"Why not?"

"Because."

I swore and threw my stress ball against the wall. OK, so I admit it - I like throwing things. Especially when I'm angry. "Terri, I can't help you if your not gonna help yourself. Either help me help you or stop wasting my time."

"Fine then, I'll do this alone!" Terri stormed out. ~Oops.. That one back fired.~ I sighed and went to review my notes. Hunter was making excellent progress - he'd stopped having nightmares and his self-esteem and attitude was improving. Shawn was still worried about him, but then Michaels was always over protective of Helmsley. Eddie wasn't doing so well. Since the Radicals had pretty much fallen apart, Eddie was going it alone. Despite the fact that he hadn't suffered as much abuse as Hunter hadn’t, he was still handling it all fairly badly. I thought about how I could help him out more, then remembered that I had to start putting myself first, especially with a child on the way.

A child on the way. I thought about those words and how much they affected me. This would be my child, I would be the one taking care of him/her, I would watch them grow up, I would be their mother. Ever since my little girl had been given up, I'd longed for another child, for one I could proudly call my own. I couldn't believe how excited I felt.

Suddenly my phone rang. "Maxwell's crematorium, you kill 'em we grill 'em"

"Very funny."

"I thought so. What's doin Bliss?"

"Since you're gonna be in town in a few weeks, Lexi wants you and - more to the point - Test to stay with us."

"I'd planned to anyway. Why waste money on accommodation when you can sponge off family?"

"So true." Laughed Bliss. "I wouldn't mind having Test stay, just to get to know him better. And that's the problem. I don't know him at all. Can I trust him? Can I trust him and Lexi?"

"I'd trust my daughter with him." I said. I could hear the smile in Bliss's voice. "Good-o. Would it be safe to put them in the same room?"

"Are you ready to become a grandmother?"

"You’re sleeping in Lexi’s room, Test is in the guestroom." Bliss said firmly. I laughed. "Good choice."

"So how’d things go with Kane?"

"I totally don’t wanna talk about it." I burst into tears, then proceeded to talk about it for the next forty minutes. As I was settling down, there was a loud thumping on the door. "Nita! You in there?"

"Duty calls." I sighed. Bliss laughed softly. "Fair enough. You take care of yourself you hear?"

"Will do." I hung up and unlocked the door, staring at the livid figure in front of me. "Bradshaw, what the hell is wrong?"

"Apparently Terri is going to have my baby."

A few days later I watched with interest as Terri and Bradshaw both stormed into my office, yelling at each other.

"How the hell can you be so sure that it's my kid?" shouted Bradshaw. "It could be anyone’s! And you told me you were on the Pill! You lying whore!"

"I AM on the Pill dickhead. Or was until I found out I was pregnant." Terri shouted back. I moved around behind Terri and locked the door. I wondered whether I should leave or not. Bradshaw and Terri -and I was still having trouble wrapping my mind around that one! - didn't really need me there, just a place to fight. On the other hand, I didn't want anything broken. I curled up under the desk and thought.

A family. Well it wouldn't be a family in a conventional sense of the word, as Kane and I were on a break. But then how did you define family? Family wasn't necessarily bound by blood. DX for example. Despite a lot of in fighting they were a lot closer than some of the families I knew. Take Bliss for example. She and Jon had taken things slowly to the point of everyone placing bets on whether they'd ever get married at all. They waited until they were certain it was the right thing, got engaged, and made everyone wait a while longer before getting married. Lexi was born one year later, then they discovered Jon couldn't have any more children. After years of waiting, Danetta was adopted and about six months later Jon decided that he didn't want to be part of a family any more. The divorce had been slightly bitter but not as bad as some break ups. So after all that thought and careful consideration, the courting period had been longer than the actually marriage. Now Jon was off gallivanting the world and Bliss had a 20 year old and a 13 year old to look after. Life really sucked.

~~~~~~~

"Uh, Nita?" Oh god, what now? I opened an eye to see Bradshaw and Terri looking down at me. "What?"

"Can we get out of here? You locked the door then fell asleep." Bradshaw asked, glancing at Terri. I stretched and yawned. "Did you two decide on anything?"

"Not really." Terri admitted. "But we did agree that abortion wasn't an option. So I'm gonna go talk to Vince about staying away from the ring, but on the road. I guess we'll decide further down the track."

"Not what I was hoping for, but it will do for now." I cracked my neck and wondered if I could talk Hunter into massaging it for me. When word got around about Kane and I being on a 'break' Hunter and the rest of DX had promised to look after me during the pregnancy. X-Pac said it was their way of thanking me for everything I'd done for them during the whole Chyna thing. I just wished they'd get over it and realise it was part of my job.

"Can I make a suggestion?" I asked tentatively. They both nodded. "If, when the child is born, either of you is the slightest bit uncertain about being a parent, then get the baby adopted out. It's harsh, I know and believe me kids, there is nothing harder than handing your own flesh and blood over to someone else for life, but it will best for your kid. Got it?"

"Yes Nita." They quietly shuffled out the now unlocked door. I hid a grin and yawned. It was gonna be a long 7 months.

"Ohhh, I don't feel so good." I moaned quietly about a week later. I was only 10 weeks pregnant, and I hated morning sickness already. Billy rubbed my back. "You alright?"

"No, I think I'm gonna - ohhh.." I bolted into the toilets, making it just in time. As I stepped out, a blonde figure flashed past and into the toilets, where throwing up noises could be heard. I grinned weakly. "Evening Terri."

"I HATE BEING PREGNANT! I'M GONNA FUCKING KILL HIM!" Was screamed at me before the sound effects came again. They were making my stomach churn, and I didn't wanna be ill again. "See you out there."

I left the toilets quickly, holding my stomach. I hadn't been this ill the first time around. Rounding a corner, I literally bumped into Kane. "Uhm, hey."

"Are you alright?" Kane asked with quiet concern. ~Compared to what?~ I thought. However the fact that he had noticed my rather hasty exit gave me a little glow. I smiled up at him. "It's just morning sickness Kane. It's perfectly normal."

"How long is it gonna last?"

"I'm going to be throwing up from now until the birth." OK so maybe not, but I just wanted to see Kane's reaction. "Oh. And women voluntarily put themselves through that? You're willing to go through it, to have my baby?"

"Yes." I glanced at floor, I didn't want him to see the pain I knew would be showing through. Kane gently wiped a tear off my face. "Thank you."

I kept my head down until Kane had left and then disappeared into the depths of the arena. I needed to be alone for a while. But as I rounded another corner, I saw Jesse talking to Bradshaw. "So what's it like man?"

"What?"

"Knowing that at the end of all the abuse and name calling from Terri, there's going to be a little person that you helped create."

"Go ask Kane."

~Jesus word gets around quickly, huh little one?~ I thought, ducking out for sight for some reason still unknown to me at this point in time. Jesse persisted. "I did. Then ran. He looked fairly pissed off and I didn't wanna get hurt."

I stifled a giggle. Bradshaw laughed heartily. "Well I can tell you this. I look at Terri and it just amazes me. I mean, I'm not in love with her and I don't like her that much, but she's basically carrying around something that is a part of me y'know? And at the end of it all, I've helped bring another life into the world."

"Summing it up in 25 words or less you'd say?"

"Like you said, at the end of all the abuse, there's gonna be a little person that I helped create. It's an amazing feeling man." Bradshaw strode off.

"Yeah, and one I'll never know about." muttered Jesse watching the tall Texan walk away. He turned around and started heading in my direction. I ducked back out of sight to avoid being seen. The phone ringing completely defeated the purpose, as Jesse heard the unmistakable ring. ~Hmm ok so maybe getting Orion to program wrestling themes into the phone for the ringing was a stupid move. I hate it when Bliss is right.~

"It's your money, make the - Bliss, what is it?" Her hysterical sobbing stopped me in my tracks and a cold fear gripped my heart. "It's happened Nita. The one thing that we thought would never happen has happened and I'm completely unprepared for it."

My insides churned and a cold sweat broke out. I sagged against the wall weakly and started shaking. Jesse forgot his obvious annoyance at me and ran over to make sure I was ok. I shook my head as the words I'd been dreading for ten years seemed to echo around my head.

"Lexi's discovered who Danetta's biological mother is."

I went straight for my car, telling Jesse that a family crisis had come up and to pass the word around that I would be gone for a few days.

When I finally reached Bliss’s place, Lexi refused to let me in. Finally Danetta decided for her, by hitting Lexi in the back of the knees with her schoolbag, then unlocking the door. I scooped Danetta up in my arms, hugging her tight.

My baby. I loved this child with everything I had and nobody on Earth can imagine how much it meant to me that I had been able to watch her grow up and be there for some of her most important moments. Of course, watching Dani run to Bliss whenever something went wrong hurt like crazy, but I got used to it.

"Nita!" Bliss came tearing out of the kitchen. I hugged her tightly. "Has-" I inclined my head towards Dani – "been told anything?"

"No. Lexi isn’t speaking to anyone. She called Test just after I called you and he said that he would come up if possible." Bliss replied. I nodded biting my lip. ~ Looks like someone’s about to get inducted into the family network of deception and cover stories. ~ "Hey! What was that for?"

"That was for hitting me with your schoolbag and letting this bitch into the house!" spat Lexi, chasing after Dani. "MOM!!"

"ALEXIS!" Shouted Bliss. "You have no right to talk to either your aunt or your sister that way. Apologize now."

"She is not my sister." Hissed Lexi in low tone. Bliss glared at her. "Oh yes she is and you will apologise."

"Fine. Danetta, I’m sorry. Nita -" I interrupted her. "Don’t bother Alexis. You don’t mean a word of it and for you to insult my intelligence with a false apology is a far greater insult than anything else."

We stared at each other. I could detect a small amount of remorse in her eyes, but it was quickly overshadowed by anger. Bliss made a noise of relief as the doorbell rang.

"Test. Billy? Jesse? Kane?" I stared in shock at the men standing on the step. Jesse shrugged. "Bliss called, said you needed my help, so I came. What’s up?"

"Oh good, you did come." Bliss appeared at my shoulder. "Can you & Billy take Dani out for a few hours? There’s something we need to discuss and I think it would be for the best if Kane was present. I’m not exactly sure why Lexi asked you to come up Test, but –"

"He’s here because I asked him to be." Lexi reached around me and dragged Test inside. The rest of us looked at each other. I sighed. "Looks like we better get this over with."

"Hey Dani!" called Bliss. "There’s a puppy dog out here who wants someone to play with!"

We smiled as Dani called back "Can I keep it?" and then laughed as Billy pouted and muttered "Over my dead body."

"Mom, where’s the – JESSE!" Dani launched herself at Jess. She had been a fan of Jesse since she’d first started watching Raw. For her birthday, I’d sent her one of the stuffed ‘Roaddogg’s’ and an autographed picture. They’d met a few months after I started with the WWF and my baby girl idolised Jess. The feeling had been mutual, and a close friendship had sprung up between the two. She also adored Billy, but to a lesser extent.

"Hey munchkin." Jesse grabbed her easily. She hugged him tightly then hugged Billy. Smiling widely, the duo hugged her back just as tight. "You wanna get away from those boring women – and Kane - and come and have some real fun?"

"Yeh!"

I shoot a warning look at Jesse. "What are you going to teach her this time? The last three times she went to the cinemas we nearly got kicked out because of the Jaffas trick."

The three chuckled evilly and I wondered what they’d teach her to do this time. Dani was only 13, and a very impressionable kid. She’d already been suspended for using various catchphrases (‘If your not down with that, I got two words for ya’ is not something a teacher wants to hear in answer to ‘Why didn’t you do your homework?’)

"We’ll take care of her." Promised Jesse. I remembered the conversation I had overheard between him and Bradshaw and I realised why he was always so willing to spend time with kids and why he was always so delighted to see Danetta. ~Note to Self: Talk to Jess about his love for kids and the fact that he probably won’t have any.~

"Bye Mom. Bye Nita." Dani waved from Billy’s shoulder’s as the trio wandered off. Bliss and I looked at each other, then at Kane. He put his arm around my shoulders. Bliss sighed. "Let’s go explain to the terrible twenty year old why her little sister isn’t her sister, but her cousin instead."

The five of us sat in the lounge room. Kane and I sat together on the couch, his arm was around my shoulders and he held my hand in his. I was incredibly grateful for the emotional support. Lexi was sitting on Test's lap in an armchair and Bliss sat in the empty fireplace. She claimed it helped her resolve problems, because whenever things got too bad, she could remind herself that she could be sitting in a blazing fireplace and then she'd really be in trouble.

Bliss and I stared at Lexi, but she pretended to ignore us. After a few minutes, she glanced up. "What?"

"Why are you being such a bitch about this?" I blurted. Test raised his eyebrows and opened his mouth to say something, but was silenced with a look from Kane. Lexi stared back at me. "What do you care?"

"If I didn't care I wouldn't have asked."

"Just answer the question Alexis." Bliss sighed, rolling her eyes. Lexi threw her hands in the air. "Why the hell is everyone picking on me?"

"Why not?" I replied. Lexi and I faced off for a while. I felt a sharp pang of regret. We'd once been very close and I knew that for whatever reason Lexi had turned on me, we would never be that close again.

"Fine, then I guess I'll tell my side of things, that's if miss thang over here is willing to listen to something that may change her self righteous view of the situation." I spoke calmly, hating the look of pain that I'd caused to cross Lexi's face. I looked at Test. "What you are going to hear goes no further. You got that? If I find out you've told anyone, I will make life living hell. Do I make myself clear?"

He nodded silently. I poured myself a glass of water. "As a child, I was fairly good - I think. Didn't cause too much trouble, usually did what I was told, got up to the usual primary school hi-jinks. You know that kind - short sheeting beds, using the art room for a clay fight - innocent kind of stuff.

"Then between primary school and high school we moved. I fell in with what can only be described as a bad crowd. I mean bad Thirteen years old, smoking pot at lunch times, smoking in the toilets between classes, drinking and screwing around on the weekends. I honestly don't know how Mum and Dad put up with it, although as the youngest of six, they'd learnt the hard way that the best thing would just be to let it run it's course."

"The night I turned fourteen, my friends and I snuck out and into a nightclub in the city. We all met someone there and paired off with them. I met a guy called Michael. While we were at the club I acted like a right little tramp. Then it reached about 5am and I thought I'd better get back home before Dad got up for work. Michael drove me home. Halfway there he pulled his car into a deserted alley and raped me repeatedly." I heard Test gasp and I felt Kane's grip on me tighten, but I kept looking straight into Lexi's eyes.

"Six weeks later I discovered I was pregnant with Danetta. Now I may have been a tramp, but I had managed to remain a virgin until then, so don't you dare question Danetta's paternity. Anyway, after much thought and careful consideration, I decided the best thing I could do was give the child up for adoption."

"Jon and I had just been told by the doctors that I couldn't have any more children, so we decided to adopt Nita's child." Bliss took the story up. "Besides that, I wanted Nita to be a part of her child's life in some way. Plus Lexi was kinda spoiled rotten and after the fun upbringing I'd had as the oldest of 6, I didn't want my girl to be an only child."

The basics of the story over, I leaned into Kane's side and shut my eyes. Lexi cleared her throat. "I just don't see how you could just hand over your own child to someone else."

"Lexi it wasn't like that. For gods sake, I was fourteen. I loved Danetta so much it hurt physically to hear her call Bliss 'Mummy.' It still does. But I had to do what would be best for Dani, not what I wanted to do. I can easily see that by giving Dani to your parents to raise as their own, I did the best thing possible. Now I know you love your little sister, and I don't want you to tell her a damned thing or treat her any differently."

"I won't."

"Good." I got up and left. Lexi followed me to the guestroom, where I was spending the night. "Nita I’m sorry."

"Why? That’s all I wanna know. Why were you such a bitch about it?"

"I don’t know! You and I have always been really close, sometimes more like friends than aunt and niece. I mean, there’s only six and a half years between us. I’d always cherished your friendship and how you never treated me like your niece, but like an equal. As the youngest, Dani gets spoiled, but I felt like I was one up on her when it came to you. And when I read the official papers, and that Dani wasn’t your niece, but your daughter, I felt like that had been taken away from me. I was jealous. I was upset, cause I love that kid, and to learn that she’s not my sister, but my cousin – I just felt gypped. Can you forgive me?"

"Oh baby." I hugged her tightly. "I’m still pissed off about it, but I’ll get over it. The Maxwell’s don’t hold grudges you should know that by now."

"Dad does." Lexi pointed out. I smirked. "Yeah, but he’s only a Maxwell by marriage. Now get outta here. I need my beauty sleep."

3 months later

"Chyna's being released from prison and wants to come back."

"What?" I stared at Vince in shock. "You can't be serious!"

Vince shifted uncomfortably. "I can see no good reason why not."

"I can." I muttered. "Fine Vince, if that's what you want to do, go right ahead. But I have a few conditions. 1.Chyna is not to be in any angles with either Hunter or Eddie for at least six months. 2. Chyna is not to be left alone with either Eddie or Hunter for at least six months. 3. I am not going to act as Chyna's shrink. 4. If she does something like this again, then she is gone, for good and you are not to use your influence to sweeten her deal."

"And if I disagree or break the deal?" Vince raised his eyebrows at me. I smiled sweetly. "Then I quit."

"I thought that would be it." Vince laughed. "Nita, you are one of the most valuable employees I have ever had. You give the job your everything and it shows. But now, I think it's time that you dedicate a lot less time to your work and a lot more time to yourself and the baby."

I looked at the floor guiltily. Due to stress and not taking care of myself properly, I'd woken up in hospital under surveillance a few times. Kane was ready to lock me in my office and force-feed me if he had to. I know I was driving a lot of people crazy. I was at five and half months and still running around like a chicken with its head cut off.

"I know." I mumbled. Vince hugged me. "I mean it. Take care of yourself. And the little one."

I made my escape and went to see Eddie. He and Hunter had been with me when Vince made his announcement about Chyna's possible return. Eddie had just gotten up and walked out, Hunter had muttered something and left. I wanted Eddie to know that I was fighting on his behalf, the poor thing felt as though he didn't have a friend in the world.

When I got to Eddie's room, I was surprised to see Jericho there. I knocked on the open door to let them know I was there. "Just dropping by to let you know that I’ve negotiated a deal with Vince. You don’t have to go near her if you don’t want to."

"Thanks Nita." Eddie replied gratefully. I smiled at him. "That’s what I’m here for."

Later that day, I ran into Jericho in the gym. I’d taken to using the cardiovascular equipment to keep myself fit and healthy. "Hey Nita, I was thinking about the whole Chyna thing the other night. Hunter has DX, but Eddie doesn’t really have anyone."

"Yeah, that’s had me worried too."

"So I decided that I’d try and help him, y’know, just talk to him, let him unload, just stuff like that. I mean, you’re here and everything, but I was with Chyna for a while and it’s just, well-"

"A guy thing." I finished with a grin. I ruffled Chris’s hair. "Thanks. Maybe he’ll open up to you."

I walked away, feeling slightly better.

I was thinking this over on the road the next week. I was travelling in the DX van with Hunter, Sean, Billy, Jesse and Terri. Terri and I were under strict instructions from Vince not to travel alone or drive, especially since we'd begun suffering from fairly bad travel sickness. DX were still helping me out in every way possible, and since nobody else had the patience to stop the car whenever Terri or I wanted to throw up, the boys were stuck with us.

Billy and Jesse were snuggled up in the back seat, Terri and I were sprawled across the next two rows, taking up one each, Sean was riding shotgun and Hunter was driving. We'd played 'I Spy' (I spy with my little eye something beginning P." "Pregnant women?" "No." "Paper?" "No." "Plaits?" "No." "Pokemon?" "No." "People?" "No." "Then what?" "Painted lines down the middle of the road.") 'WWF I went to the Picnic" (I went to the WWF picnic and I brought Angle's Gold Medals, Bradshaw's poker cards, Crash's baseball cap, Doggy's hair extensions, Edge's vinyl jacket, Farooq's beer money, Gangrel’s puffy shirt, Hunter's plastic surgeon, Ivory’s scarf, Jericho's ego, Kat's wigs, Luna's tongue piercing, Mae Young’s baby hand, the Ninth Wonder of the World, Outlaws slashfic, Pete Rose in a chicken suit, Queer Giraffes, the Rock’s eyebrow, Steve Austin’s monster truck, Trish’s breast implants, Undertakers old coat and hat, Val’s socks, a WWF referee to keep the peace and X-Pac’s butt padding.) Played poker (won by Terri), held a Tetris tournament (won by me)courtesy of multi player connectors and a Pokemon tournament (won by Jesse), also courtesy of the multi player cable.

We’d argued a fair bit too. Does God have a sense of humour? (NO! according to the mothers to be, and YES! According to those who weren’t pregnant), What we would do if we were in control of the WWF (make The Rock job to the Kat), which Pokemon was the best (Beedrill! Pikachu blows!) and the meaning of life (42). Now we were bored (read: not talking to each other.) and in the case of Terri and myself, extremely nauseous.

"Stop the car, I’m gonna be sick!"

Hunter screeched to a stop and Terri leapt out of the van. Billy snickered. "Nita – 4, Terri – 6. Nita can you throw up twice more?"

"Why?"

"Cause I bet Jesse $100 that you throw up more than Terri does." Billy smirked. I smirked back. "Blow me."

Sean laughed as Terri got back into the car and Hunter pulled back onto the road. We’d been travelling for around 25 minutes, when my phone rang.

"Nita it’s Bradshaw. We’re about ten minutes ahead of you. There’s some lunatic in a red 4-wheel drive attempting to run people of the road. Warn Hunter and tell Terri to be careful."

"Will do." I promised and hung up. I relayed the message to Hunter, who nodded and watched the road carefully.

Less than 5 minutes later, a red 4 – wheel drive cut in front of us from a side street. Hunter swore loudly. "Sit tight kids."

I noticed that Terri was shaking. Scared, I watched as the 4-Wheel did a U-Turn and drove straight at us, swerving away at the last second. No matter how I felt about the driver, I had to admit that she/he had good control over the car. Hunter cursed again. "Belt up folks, it’s gonna be a rough ride."

I put my seatbelt on and grabbed Terri’s hand as we were bumped from behind. Seconds later we were over taken, the red car coming dangerously close to the van. You could almost see the tension in the air. Looking around, I saw fear and anxiety on every face.

"Billy, Jesse." Hunter spoke curtly. "Sit with the girls. Try to protect them if anything happens."

"Oh god." Gasped Terri. Without speaking, Billy sat with Terri and Jesse sat next to me. He held me close, in an attempt to comfort me, while I sobbed silently on his shoulder.

"I’m gonna overtake." Hunter announced. He pulled out, then speed up. The 4 wheel drive accelerated until it was level with us, then swung towards us.

There was the sickening sound of metal against metal, Hunter quietly saying "Fuck. I’ve lost it." And a scream from Terri that seemed to go on and on until everything went black.

"Oh my God."

"Did the police get the driver?"

"Yeah. Did you hear who it was?"

"Who? Don’t tell me that Val was right."

"Yup. Val was right. How did you guys get there so quickly?"

"Bradshaw had called Nita to warn her about the dickhead. When he hadn’t heard back in 15 minutes, he called again to make sure everything was ok and got no answer. Bradshaw decided something was wrong and got Farooq to go back."

"Good thing he did. Did you hear about –"

I drifted in and out of consciousness, hearing snatches of conversation. I knew that I should show them somehow that I was alive, but everything hurt so much………………

"How is he?"

"He’s calmed down a fair bit, but he’s still not taking it too well. I think he’s scared more than anything else."

"Well the doc said that she may stay like this for years."

"And I think he’s willing to stay with her for that long."

"He really is madly in love with her isn’t he?"

Pain, shooting through every part of my body. Wishing I could slip into unconsciousness again. Unconsciousness meant that the pain went away. I was alone this time, I could tell by the lack of voices. Then, through the fog of pain, came a quiet voice.

"Well we’re alone. It’s been nearly 3 weeks since the accident and this is the first time I’ve been left alone with you. I don’t think the doctors trust me with you. I don’t know why – I could never hurt you, not intentionally anyway. I love you too much. God, I’m so glad the baby is alright. I don’t know what I’d do if you lost the baby."

"You should’ve seen the look on the doctors face when she asked who the father was and I stepped forwards. I guess I can see her point, I mean, there’s Hunter, Vince, Edge, Jericho, Test and me. Four good looking young men and one deformed monster, and it’s the monster who’s fathered the child."

I heard the words clearly. For some reason it seemed important that I listen.

"I don’t know what I’ll do if you don’t come out of this. No other woman could love me the way you do. You know me inside out, you see past the scars and the shield I built around myself to who I really am and you love me anyway. I know now that I first fell in love with you while I was still with Tori. I also know that I didn’t love her, I was infatuated with her and I was in love with the idea that she seemed to want me."

Every word seemed to pull me closer and closer. I struggled to get out of the black void of oblivion.

"I love you. I love you so much it scares me. Seeing you like this made me realize that all I want is to take care of you and the baby. I’d give up everything if I knew it meant you would both be fine. I only asked for that break because I was scared that I was becoming so dependant on you. I’ve spent most of my life alone and to need someone as much as I need you scared me. If you had’ve said ‘Kane, I need you.’ ‘Kane, please don’t.’ ‘Kane, stay, help me with get through this pregnancy.’ I would have. But you told Edge that you understood my reasons and that you would respect my decision no matter how much it hurt…………" The voice trailed off into sobs.

"You mean all I had to do was speak up and you would’ve stayed?" I whispered hoarsely. I tried to reach out for him, but simply didn’t have the strength. "I’m ok, the baby’s ok and you’ll be ok. We’re all gonna be ok."

I wasn’t allowed to have visitors outside family for two weeks. At the end of five days I called Hunter and told him to get DX’s asses up and see me and while he was at it, bring my boys. As much as I love Bliss, Lexi, Dani and Kane, they were very serious and I needed some laughter damnit.

"Uh, excuse me Ms Maxwell?" a young nurse poked her head in the door. I looked up from the Gameboy. "Yeah, what?"

"Your 3 stepbrothers, your brother in law and 5 of your cousins wish to see you."

"Then send them in for Christ’s sake." I muttered, glaring at her. She coughed nervously. "Uhm, there is some doubt as to whether they are who they claim to be. And we can only let four people in at a time."

"If they say they’re my family then obviously they are." I complained. "It’s 11pm at night, who’s gonna know?"

"I’m sorry, but it’s regulations."

Kane stood up very slowly. "Would it help if I went out to see them and prove that they are members of Ms Maxwell’s family? Or shall I have to take further action?"

"Uh, no that would be fine." The nurse stammered. Kane followed her out and returned minutes later with my ‘stepbrothers’, Hunter, Sean and Billy, my ‘brother in law’ Jesse and my ‘cousins’ Test, Val, Chris and Christian. I did a quick head count. "Where’s Edge? And how did you get in?"

"Edge is trying to revive the nurse. He grinned at her and she fainted." Explained Christian. Chris laughed. "Co incidentally that’s how we got in."

I laughed with them. I’d missed my boys. Lexi spoke up. "How did you five manage to pass as cousins anyway?"

I looked at Christian, Chris, Test and Val. The blondes had their long hair tied back, all four were wearing jeans and a hockey shirt. I was willing to bet that Edge was dressed the same. Everyone in the room looked at Lexi. She shrugged. "Yeah, ok, stupid question, I admit it."

"So what’ve my boys been up to?" I asked, smiling widely. Val smiled back. "Worrying about our Nita."

"Course ya have." I scoffed. "Seriously?"

"Seriously!" insisted Jericho. "We’ve been on hot coals, waiting for a call to say whether you’ve pulled through or not. Vince nearly had to call off the PPV because everyone was so edgy."

"As it was, the call that you were on the critical list came through just before a tag tournament – Edge & myself vs Hardyz vs Too Cool vs Val & Test." Christian said. I thought for a second. "Who won?"

"That’s not the point!" insisted Test in annoyance. Lexi hugged him and patted him on the head. "Poor baby."

Laughing, I looked at DX. "So how are you?"

"We’re fine." Billy replied. Jesse muttering "Now anyway’ under his breath.

"What happened?" Bliss and Kane had refused to tell me anything. I could see them glaring at the boys, making ‘don’t tell her’ signals. DX ignored them.

"How much do you remember?" asked Hunter. I thought for a second. "Everything. You tried to over take, we got hit, you said ‘Fuck. I’ve lost it, Terri screamed, we impacted with something and I went black."

"Nothing after that?" pressed Sean. I shook my head. "Nothing of importance anyway. What did we hit?"

"A stationary truck. Well we all were knocked unconscious in the crash. The Acolytes found us and called an ambulance straight away. I got out of it the luckiest – only a sprained wrist, broken nose and concussion." Hunter began. I couldn’t resist. "Hey, that’s right, I noticed there was something – smaller about your nose."

"Bitch."

"Thank you. What did the rest of you suffer?"

"Broken wrist, nasty gash on the head, a broken rib and some internal bleeding and injuries." Sean told me, holding up the cast. I felt sick. "You were shotgun weren’t you? You got the worst of it."

"Not quite." He shook his head silently. I bit my lip. "Billy?"

"Fractured rib, cuts and bruises, concussion and a couple of small internal injuries." He lifted his shirt to show me the bandages. I bit my lip harder and drew blood. I could feel the tears welling in my eyes.

"Jess?"

"Broken ankle, broken ribs, severe cuts and bruises, head injuries – I was out to it for nearly a week, a fair amount of internal injuries and a dislocated shoulder." Jesse pointed out the visible signs of the accident as he named them. Tears started streaming down my cheeks. "How?"

"Aw, shit." He sighed. "All I could think about was protecting you. I knew that if something serious happened, I’d have to face Kane and I mean, you’re a damned good friend. I didn’t even think about myself, just you and the baby."

"What about Terri?" I asked nervously. Jesse held my hand. "Terri survived. She came out of it alive and in one piece. Small concussion, a sprained wrist and cuts and bruises."

"That’s not all is it?" I asked, ready to throw up. Everyone was silent, avoiding eye contact. "Tell me what else!"

"Nita." Jesse looked at me then glanced away. I couldn’t take anymore. "WHAT?"

"Terri lost the baby."

I was released from the hospital a week later. When we rejoined the WWF at the hotel, the first thing I did was find Terri. She was in her room, sitting in an armchair, staring blankly out the window. Bradshaw and Farooq were there, watching her and whispering in concerned voices.

I gingerly knocked on the open door. Bradshaw smiled when he saw me, rushing forwards to hug me. "I’m damned glad you’re all right Nita."

"I’m glad your all right too." I looked behind Bradshaw and Farooq to where Terri was seated. She stared at me, then at my very pregnant stomach where the little one – we still hadn’t picked names yet – was practicing his boxing. I was convinced it would be a boy, simply by the fact that I hadn’t been this ill with Danetta. Kane hoped for a girl, but was willing to take whatever came. It suddenly occurred to me that Terri may not exactly want to see me in present condition right then.

But then her facade shattered and she burst into tears. The Acolytes quietly left as I sat next to Terri, hugging her tight and rocking her in my arms until she fell asleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~

"That’s the first time she’s done that." I looked up in surprise to see Bradshaw leaning against the door.

"Huh?"

"Terri. It’s the first time she’s cried since our baby died. Because she was at seven months at the time, the doctors tried to save Laura – we had a little girl, and that was the girl’s name we settled on – had suffered too many injuries. She lived for three and a half hours."

"Do you wanna talk about it?"

"I rode with Terri in the ambulance. Almost immediately the docs decided a Caesarean would be performed. There was a chance that I would have had to choose between Terri and Laura – which one I wanted the doctors to save most. Laura was born just as she reached the hospital. She was so tiny! She had Terri’s nose and eyes and my hair and mouth. They did all they could but it was useless. I remember holding her in my arms afterwards marvelling at how one drunken encounter could produce such a perfect human being."

I knew exactly what he meant. Dani had most of my features, which had made it easier to pass her off as Bliss’s kid. I smiled. "I know exactly what you mean."

"It’s incredible isn’t it!" he exclaimed. "Farooq took some photos of me holding Laura. We wanted to get some with Terri and Laura and a photo of the three of us, but the docs were still working on Terri when they took my little girl away."

"Terri was hysterical when I told what had happened to our daughter. They had to sedate her. When she came back round, she was calm, but not a good calm – more like an emotional void."

We sat there in silence for a few minutes, looking down at Terri. She appeared so fragile. A thought occurred to me. "What about the driver of the red four wheel drive? What ever happened to them?"

"The police caught him. He’s been charged with reckless driving and intent to cause injury. I don’t know what his sentence is, but I do know that if I ever see the asshole again he will suffer. Plus, DX and some others have taken out restraining orders against him."

Terri stirred and began waking up. I glanced at her, before asking "Bradshaw who was it?"

"Who? The driver?" he replied absently, watching Terri with concern. I rolled my eyes. "Yes dumbass, the driver."

Terri snorted. "That would’ve been my ex husband, Dustin."

I sat in the corner a month later, watching everyone else prepare for the upcoming PPV and Sunday Night Heat. Terri had pulled through her grieving period okay and was still a little too quiet for my liking, but was getting along fine. DX were preparing to get to actually fight for the first time since the accident. Nobody was happy about this, but the boys had insisted. I hoped that their opponents would go easy and the fans weren’t too unforgiving.

Dustin Runnels had been released on good behaviour. The only reason he’d gotten sent to prison was the lucky fact that we’d been in Minnesota at the time of the accident and that Jesse Ventura was still governor. Maybe it wasn’t fair, but it’s not what you know, it’s who you know. Runnels had told someone in prison that it was Terri’s fault he had to leave the WWF (I’m not sure how he figured that one out) and it wasn’t fair that she was having another child when she’d shipped Dakota off to boarding school instead of being a real mother which I thought was unfair.

Kane was fighting with his brother against The Big Show and Austin, with Mick Foley as special guest ref. I was pleased to see Mick again, he’d become one of my father figures on the road. I wasn’t impressed to hear that Kane and Mark would be tagging together. I just knew that something would go wrong or that The Undertaker would turn on Kane again.

Tonight, I planned to watch from the audience instead of from behind the scenes. With 6 weeks to go, Vince had forced me into taking maternity leave, by simply threatening to fire me if I didn’t. I didn’t argue.

Everything was ready for the birth. We had clothes galore, toys, rocker, crib, car seat, bottles, blankets - in pink and blue. There had been no official word on what sex the baby would be, but I knew in my heart it was a boy – Tristan Jordan, we’d eventually compromised on, TJ for short. If my instincts were wrong (yeah right!) and it was a girl, she’d be called Astrea Maree. As much as I’d enjoyed being pregnant, I just wanted it over with. "Hurry up kiddo, the world’s not such a bad place."

"Hey Nita, have you met my brother and my father?" I glanced up and stared. The Undertaker was a helluva lot more intimidating face to face than on a TV screen. I’d met Paul before and he seemed ok – I didn’t completely trust either of them, but that was mainly due to how they’d treated Kane in the past.

"So I’m gonna be an uncle?" the Undertaker asked quietly. I felt a cold chill run through me. No was he gonna do anything to hurt my baby. Kane nodded proudly. Paul cackled and grinned at me.

I suddenly remembered something that Bearer had told me once before about the Undertaker. "It’s all for show. Despite what you may heat he does have feelings. He’s a dark man, but that is mostly because of his past. Everything he’s done – with a few exceptions, have been because he’s believed that it was the right thing to do. Mark loves Kane dearly, and feels a lot of guilt over what’s happened."

"So he should." I’d replied coldly and had refused to listen to Paul sing any more of Mark’s praises.

But now, looking into the eyes of the ‘Dead Man Walking’ I realised it was true, Mark was human. And to be perfectly blunt that knowledge surprised me a little. The Undertaker sensed my feelings and smiled again, kneeling down so we were – sorta – face-to-face. "Nita, many people have been singing your praises around her for a long time. I’m not who I come across as – not completely anyway. I wouldn’t do a thing to hurt you, or the baby. You’ve tamed my baby brother into a calmer person. If I tried anything to hurt either of you, I would have to face Kane, Austin, DX, Foley, and the Brats and that would be the opening. I couldn’t do it, not when I see Kane so happy with you."

I looked at him in surprise. "I’ll accept that as your word. I’d like to talk to you another in more detail though."

"No problem." He smiled again – a genuine smile, one of happiness. I wondered if he, Kane and Paul would sort all their differences out. Nah.

The three of us chatted for a few more minutes, then Paul saw Mick and went to talk to him, while Kane and Taker began discussing strategy for the match. I listen for a few minutes, then got bored. "I’ll be back in a second hon."

Kane nodded absently, but I could feel Taker’s eyes on me as I walked off. ~Did he mean it? Or was it all just a ploy?~ I didn’t know, but there was only one way to find out – wait and see. I washed my face and checked my hair, before standing side on and watching the youngster wiggled around inside me. I couldn’t believe it was so close to the birth.

I was concentrating so hard on watching my stomach moving that I didn’t hear the door swing open or the footsteps as another woman walked into the bathroom.

"Hello Juanita."

I spun round in shock, staring at the figure before me.

"Chyna?"

"Yeah it’s me. I’m back, officially. I wasn’t meant to reappear until after you give birth, in order not to stress you out too much, but I just couldn’t wait. So? How much longer?" She smiled down at me, looking friendly enough, but I could see a hint of animosity in her smile. I smiled back. "Six weeks."

"Boy or girl?"

"Officially we don’t know, but I’d stake my career that it’s a boy."

"Names?"

"Tristan Jordan, TJ for short for a boy, Astrea Maree for a girl." I spoke confidently, but I was more than a little worried. After all, I’d sent this woman to jail for a year and she could put me in hospital without even trying.

"You’re not scared of me are you Juanita?" her voice was taunting. I looked her in the eyes. "Yeah, I am. You frighten me. I’m not so much worried about myself, but for my baby."

Her lips curved up in a smile. "Honest to a fault. That’s one of the things I like best about you Juanita – you call things as you see it. The other is that you stand up for what you believe is right and look out anyone who gets in your way. We’re a lot alike, whether you are willing to admit it or not."

Chyna breezed out, leaving me shaking in anger and a little bit of fear. She was going to get her revenge on me somehow – I just hoped it would be on me and me alone and that she would leave the rest of the world out of it. I remembered how this had all started – just an innocent little question about Billy and Jesse’s relationship. I couldn’t believe how much things had snowballed since then.

I stared at myself in the mirror, wondering what the hell to do next.

~~~~~~~~~~~

I cheered as Jeff Hardy stood on the turnbuckle for Senton Bomb. All around me, teenage girls were screaming their lungs out. I wondered how many of them were crying. I’d never realised how wild the crowds got until now. For the first time ever, I was sitting in the audience, not backstage.

JR looked over at me, eyebrows raised. He was convinced that I’d go into labor sometime during the PPV, which had started another round of bets from the Brat Pack. Edge had beat $1000 that I went into labor during Kane’s match. I smiled back at JR and gave him the thumbs up. The girl next to me stared at me, then at JR and back at me, but didn’t say anything. ~I wonder what she’d do if……… - now that was nasty ~ I reprimanded myself.

Slightly bored with the break in proceedings I turned to her. "Enjoying the show?"

"Aw, yeah!" she grinned. "I’ve never been to a live show before and this is amazing! What about you?"

"It’s not too bad." I agreed, smiling. I checked the card. "So who’d your tip for Jericho Vs The Rock?"

"Well I’m a Jerichoholic, so I want him to win, but I think the Rock will unfortunately. What do you think will happen? By the way, my name’s Marnie. "

"My name’s Nita." I shook her hand. Marnie grinned "I don’t know what’s gonna happen. I know what I wanna see happen and that’s DX return and annihilate the Rock, but since there’s ‘millions and millions’ of the Great One’s fans in attendance I can only dream." She snorted. I laughed. "Not a Rock fan?"

"Can’t stand him." Marnie grinned. She shook out her short strawberry blonde hair and laughed. "Ok, I promised myself I wouldn’t ask, but I need to know – why has JR been giving you ‘are you ok?’ looks all night?"

Uh –oh. I hadn’t come up with a story for this one, mainly cause I’d thought he wouldn’t be so damned obvious about it or that nobody would notice. I quickly rejected the relation alibi and settled on a fun one. "I was one of the first people into the arena, and JR was sitting out here when I arrived. He’s probably just worried I’m gonna give birth in the middle of the show."

We both laughed together as Test’s music began playing. We made it through the next matches ok, but as I was waiting for the main event my stomach tightened with nerves. I remembered the conversation I’d had with Colette Foley about watching someone you love wrestle. She’d told me that usually you’re convinced that he won’t survive the match and if he does, you’ll kill him yourself. Maybe this hadn’t been such a good idea after all.

"Are you ok?" Marnie elbowed me. "You don’t look so good."

"I’ll be fine." I lied, gritting my teeth as my stomach tightened again. I watched Kane and Mark strut down the ramp together and I realised something. It wasn’t nerves.

In concern I thought back over the night. It had been happening since mid afternoon, but nothing serious. It had just seemed like twinges of nerves to me. I glanced at the ring where Kane and The Undertaker were conferring in low voices. Undertaker glanced at me briefly and I tried to look like someone who was in labour – without making a dickhead of myself. There was no way to do it.

I grabbed my phone as the contractions came again. Marnie looked at me, concerned and a little afraid. "You’re gonna give birth aren’t you?"

"It’s more than possible." I looked over at JR, but he was busy commentating. ~ Good one Kiddo.~ I thought a little venomously. ~You couldn’t wait another 20 minutes, could you?~ Unsure of what else to do, I called Vince.

"Hello?"

"You’re never gonna believe what I’m about to tell you." I grinned in spite of myself. Vince sighed. "If you’re gonna tell me your in labour I’m not gonna be happy."

"Then start getting annoyed. And get someone to get me outta here, I don’t think I can move." The contractions were really starting to hurt. "And if possible, get Kane out of this match, I don’t know how long it’s gonna take."

"Jim’ll come and get you, you and Kane will on your way to the hospital in ten minutes, I promise." Vince hung up abruptly. I doubled over as another contraction hit and wondered if ten minutes would be enough time.

"Come on son. Show Mummy how you burp like Uncle Chris." Kane kept patting TJ’s back until he was rewarded with a loud ‘Urp.’ I laughed as TJ looked surprised at himself and gently ran my hands over his soft dark red hair.

"Getting sleepy yet sweetie?" I asked as I took TJ into my arms.

"He should be." grumbled Kane. I laughed again and was rewarded with a smile. "That’s my boy. Gonna give Daddy a smile?"

Kane poked his tongue out at TJ and was rewarded with a smile and a little gurgle of laughter. I sat down next to Kane on the couch. "So how do you like being a Daddy?"

"I love it." Kane replied softly. TJ yawned and I rocked him gently, in an attempt to send him to sleep. Kane smiled at our little boy. "It’s just – I mean, check it out. That’s my nose, and my eye shape and my coloured hair. And there’s your mouth and your eye colour and your ears. It’s like a like a Mini–Me made up of the two of us."

I smiled, I‘d never heard put quite like that. Kane asked his question. "How bad was the birth?"

"It wasn't as bad as it could have been. With Danetta the pain was a lot, lot worse. I'm sorry for all the name calling, but it seemed quite rational at the time. And look at our little boy, it's worth it." I held up TJ so he and I were nose to nose. "You gonna go to sleep so Mummy can go to sleep?"

It must have been maternal instincts. That’s all I can say in my defence, but if I hadn’t handed TJ over to his father the exact second I did, I woulda had my face thrown up on. As it was, I got most of it down the front of my top and neck. "Oh wonderful."

Kane cracked up laughing. There was a knock on the door. "Nita can you grab that while I –"

"Sure babe." I attempted to mop myself up as Kane put his mask back on. I opened the door. "What can I – oh it’s you."

Jesse barged his way in. "I just came to wish my godson goodnight – and give him this."

"This" was a Roaddogg figurine. I rolled my eyes. "I’ll put it the box with all the others till he’s old enough to appreciate them."

"Spoilsport." Teased Billy as he and Jesse sat on the arm of the couch. "Hiya Kane what’s doin?"

"Trying to get the little one to sleep." Kane replied. Billy looked up at me. "Jeez what happened to you?"

"Baby vomit. Want some?" I replied. Billy screwed up his face. "Nuh –uh."

"Bad Timing won’t sleep huh?" Jesse asked. "Gimme a try."

Due to the circumstances surrounding T.J.'s birth, Jesse and Billy had dubbed my son 'Bad Timing' and 'Main Event.' Kane had been taken out of the match by having Hunter and DX come down and 'beat him' to the back. On the tape, you can tell when Kane knows what's going on. Billy ducks down to 'get in Kane's face,' and suddenly Kane has no problem with getting backstage and leaving the ring. It's rather funny to watch. 'Bad Timing' was understandable, but Billy claimed 'Main Event' was better as listening to me abusing Kane and everyone within earshot was more entertaining than the match that was going on at the time.

"Good luck. And his name is not Bad Timing, Jesse." Kane reprimanded the duo as he handed little T.J. over. Within five minutes, his eyes were closed and he was sleeping happily. Kane and I glared at Jesse and poke in unison. "I hate you."

The Outlaws laughed, Jesse settling T.J. into his crib. "Night little man."

Billy stretched. "Mind if we stay for coffee?"

"I’m not making coffee." I replied. Billy grinned at me. "Not but Jesse’s about to."

Kane and I looked at each other. I swear there was a grin behind that bloody mask. "Sure. Go ahead. Kane, can you chuck the news on for me babe?"

"Sure." We watched the usual stories of murder and theft, till a picture came on the screen. I sat bolt upright. "Holy shit!"

"And professional wrestler Dustin Runnels is in a critical condition in hospital tonight, after his beaten and bruised body was found early this morning in the back alley behind the Platinum nightclub."

As four open mouthed looks of shock started giving way to smug grins, my phone rang. "Congratulations, you’re the fifth caller."

"Nita?"

"Yes Bradshaw?"

"If anyone asks, Farooq and I were with you and Kane ALL night last night, ok?"