Author: Charlotte
Rated: NC-17
Feedback: MistressCyberia@hotmail.com
Chapter 4There’s no style in the tears, just raw, wrenching sobs as Brian wraps his arms around me.
I shove him away, pain crawling hot and sticky down my arm.
“Dammit Brian!” I sob. “You couldn’t just let me do it, could you? You couldn’t let me go out with a little bit of dignity, a little bit of style?” My voice breaks. “Do you really hate me that much?”
Brian looks at me with his stricken, watery eyes. “How can you say that to me, AJ? How can you say I hate you?” He reaches out to me and I shrink back. He wraps his arms around his waist. “I gave up everything for you, AJ. My morals, my beliefs - ”
“Oh yeah, such great morals you had, hiring me to kill your cousin! You’re better off without them!” My head is pounding with hot rage. “You just don’t care about anything except your damn morals, do you?”
“You think I don’t care? You’re the one who won’t…” Brian’s mouth clamps shut suddenly.
“What, Brian? What the hell won’t I do for you?” I hit his shoulder with my uninjured arm.
“Everything I did, I did for you! But you wouldn’t let me do this one thing for myself!”
“What was I supposed to do, AJ? Sit back and watch you die?”
“Why the hell not Brian? You can barely stand it when I touch you; you won’t even fucking look at me! You hate me!”
Brian grabs my face between his hands, forcing my eyes up to his. “I’m looking at you, AJ, I’m touching you. I could never hate you.” His hands smooth back my hair. “Can’t you see it, AJ? Can’t you see how much I love you?”
I shake my head violently, scooting backwards, blood pouring over my hand and onto the carpet. “No. You don’t love me. You can’t. It’s wrong.” I laugh, harsh and bitter. The world is going gray, and I’m so dizzy. My head hits the carpet and Brian’s there, above me.
He grabs my hand and presses it to his cheek. His tears are warm and damp.
“Don’t do this to me, AJ.” He rips off his shirt and presses it against the sharp throbbing in my arm.
“Just stop it, Brian, please. Stop pretending that you care. It’s not fair.” My voice sounds so far away.
“I’m not pretending, AJ. Why would I?”
I try to shake my head and the world begins to spin. “Just leave me alone, Brian.”
“No. And you’re not going to leave me, either. Not after everything that’s happened.” His voice cracks. “You can’t!”
Everything’s fading in and out. I feel a hard, sharp slap across my face that brings everything back into sudden focus.
Brian’s eyes are swollen and red. “Stay with me, okay? Or else I’m going to have to start praying, and I know you’d hate that.”
I can’t help it - I smile, weak and small, but a smile nonetheless.
Brian smiles back at me, stroking my hair. He gets a hand under my shoulders and sits me up, cradling my head against his chest. I can hear his heart, thrumming just under his skin. I close my eyes.
When I open them again, I’m in a hospital. My arm throbs dully. I turn my head and see Brian curled up in a chair next to my bed.
“What happened?” I croak.
Brian blinks and smiles softly at me. “You’re awake.” He stretches his arms above his head.
“Kevin called an ambulance after you passed out. You lost a lot of blood. The bullet took a big chunk out of your arm. It took forty-three stitches.”
I let my head sink back into the pillow and stare up at the white ceiling. Twenty in my back and now forty-three in my arm. Sixty-three total.
Maybe I should just change my name to Stitches.
That, or stop hanging around Richardson.
The doctor gives me a sling and some instructions that I completely ignore, and then we head back home, curling up in my bed.
We make quite a pair, don’t we? The assassin with the gunshot wounded arm and the churchboy with the severely bruised legs.
He’s resting his head on my chest.
I play with his hair. “Why did Kevin call the ambulance? Was it just because I was getting blood all over the carpet?”
Brian lifts his head off my chest and frowns at me. “He cares about you, AJ. Don’t you know that?”
I snort. “Cares about me? He sure has a fucked-up way of showing it.”
“Kevin just has strange ways of showing affection. Always has. Just look at him and Nick.” He lays his head back down on my chest, tracing patterns on my chest. “You love him, don’t you?”
“What? With Kevin?” I sit up, and he rolls off me. “What the hell makes you say that?”
Brian shrugs, head down. “The way you look at him sometimes. How you keep going back to him.” He raises his eyes to mine. “You took his gun just so you would have an excuse to see him again, didn’t you?”
“What the fuck makes you think that, Brian?”
He drops his head again. “Well you made it pretty clear who you prefer back at Nick’s. I mean you…you…did it with him.” A blush starts to creep up his face.
“So? You and me ‘do it’ all the time.”
Brian shakes his head. “No…that’s not what I meant. I mean…you uh…you…” He’s getting very flustered, picking at the blanket and looking anywhere but at me.
“Just spit it out, Brian.”
Brian’s face has turned deep red. “You fucked him, AJ.”
“Yeah, and?”
He raises his face to mine. “You won’t…do that…with me.”
I blink. “Are you saying you want me to fuck you, Brian?”
“Um…well, it’s just that you’ll do that with him and not me. There must be some reason.” His voice gets soft and his shoulders droop. “The best thing I can come up with is that you love him.”
I grab his chin and force him to look at me. “I don’t love Kevin. I did what I did to get back at him, to show him what it felt like to be humiliated and degraded like that.”
Brian shakes his head. “No AJ, you did it to make him angry enough to shoot you.”
I sigh and drop his chin. “Why are you asking me all this shit, Brian?”
“I was faced with the possibility of losing you today, AJ. I know that in your line of work it’s always possibility, but it just never really hit me until today.” He looks at me. “And, before we go any further, I just need to know how you feel. If me being here is worth it.”
I sigh and lie back down. “Look Brian, it’s been a long day. How about we just get some sleep?”
He swallows and scoots to the edge of the bed, dragging his wheelchair over.
I grab his shoulder. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”
He turns to look at me, biting his lip. “I need to go home. You’ve made it pretty clear what you think of me.”
“You’re not going anywhere, Brian, you know that. Now just lay back down.”
He shakes my hand off. “Stop treating me like I’m yours. I’m not.” He bites back a sudden sob. “You won’t let me be.” His face crumbles and tears start to trickle down his face.
I wrap my good arm around his waist and haul him up against my chest, kissing his cheek, tasting the salty droplets. “You want to be mine?”
He sniffles and nods.
I rub my face into his neck, inhaling the scent of him. “Wait here.”
I climb out of bed and retrieve the bag from the closet. I drop it on the bed and crawl over him, capturing his tender mouth in a probing kiss. I kiss over his chin, down his throat, and fasten my mouth over one of his nipples. I suck and lick at it until he’s writhing underneath me, his cock pressing insistently against my thigh, his nipple hard and tight in my mouth. Then I move to the other nipple, giving it the same treatment.
Brian is moaning and grabbing at my hair. “AJ, please…”
I sit up and grin at him, reaching into the bag and pulling out the nipple clamps.
He eyes them warily. “What are those?”
I clamp one onto his nipple and his eyes squeeze shut, hips bucking against me. “Oh…”
I snap the other one on him and he groans. I lick my way down his chest, darting my tongue in his belly button before circling the base of his cock. I run my mouth up to the head gently suck on it. Wrapping my hand around his shaft, I stroke the vein on the underside of his cock with my thumb.
“AJ!” he cries, squirming against the sheets.
I release his cock and crawl back up his body, kissing him deep and long. He grabs the back of my head and holds my mouth firm against his, arching his hips up into mine. I slowly grind my hard cock into his and he groans into my mouth, and then breaks away, panting.
“Please, AJ.”
I raise an eyebrow at him. “Please?”
He strokes my face. “Make me yours.”
I run kisses up his jaw and down his neck, reaching into the bag and grabbing some of the lube. I begin to open it, but he grabs my wrist.
“Let me do it.” He takes the lube out of my fingers and tugs my hips up until I’m straddling his waist. He squirts some lube in his hand and then wraps it around my cock, his grip sure and firm.
I groan and thrust into his slick palm as he begins to pump me. “Shit, Brian.” He continues to run his hand up and down my shaft, until I throw my head back and grab his wrist, stilling its movement. “You have to stop or I’m gonna come right now, babe.”
I kneel between his legs, grabbing a pillow to slide under his hips. I lower my head and lick over his pink bud, stabbing at it with the tip of my tongue, working it shallowly in his entrance. His ass is writhing against my face. I sit up and tangle my fingers with his, lube rubbing off onto my hand. I smear my slick fingers over his entrance, sliding my finger in and rotating it around, loosening him up before I add a second.
Brian is rocking against my hand, hips demanding. “AJ, just do it!”
I lick my lips and raise my eyebrow at him. “Quite demanding for someone who just said they wanted to belong to me.” I smile and remove the nipple clamps, blowing lightly on the bitten flesh.
He groans and I press my cock against his ass.
He bucks up against it. “Yes! AJ, yes, do it!”
I gently lift one of his thighs with my good arm and push inside him, slow and easy. Damn, I love the way his eyes scrunch shut and his mouth opens, gasping, hands grappling for purchase on the sheets. They finally grasp my hips, urging me with his whole body to move. I oblige, thrusting more roughly than I intended, but he doesn’t seem to mind, bucking and groaning beneath me. I settle into a softer rhythm.
“No.” he gasps.
I stop. “No?”
“Don’t go slow.” He shakes his head. “Do me hard.”
His fingers bite into my hips and I push hard inside him, making him howl as I hit his prostrate. And then I can’t stop, going fast and rough, rocking the bed underneath us. My orgasm hits me fast and hard and I throw back my head, swallowing screams as I explode inside him.
As I come back down, I open my eyes and see him looking at me with wonderment, his hand wrapped around his cock. I join my hand with his and we pump him together, until he’s coming, hot and sticky over our fingers. He grabs my hand and sucks the come off each finger, licking his lips and smiling at me.
I smile back, snuggling down beside him. “Brian?”
“Yeah?” his voice is a sleepy murmur, but his eyes are bright and alert.
I brush back a sweaty strand of hair stuck to his forehead. “Next time you want me to fuck you, just ask. It’s much easier than all that dramatic emotional shit.”
His forehead creases. “So you were just waiting for me to ask?”
I nod.
“Why?”
I sigh and settle my head into the pillow. “Well, Kevin and I practically raped you. I didn’t really think that was an experience you wanted to repeat anytime soon.”
He kisses me then, soft, with just a hint of tongue. He pulls back and looks at me, brow wrinkled. I smooth it out with my fingers.
Brian bites his lip. “You never answered me when I asked how you felt about me.” I sigh, pushing my hand back through my hair. “Brian, it’s not that - ”
I’m cut off by a knock at the door. I let my breath out in a whoosh and climb out of bed, slipping on some boxers and heading to the front door.
As I open it, I’m nearly knocked over by the excited blonde bounding inside. Kevin is hanging on the doorframe.
He gives me a goofy grin. “Hey AJ, buddy! Wazzup?” He leans in and plants a sloppy kiss on my cheek. The alcohol on his breath is so thick it probably would’ve stopped a bullet from my Berretta.
He stumbles past me and flops down on the couch. “You got anything to drink, J?”
I close the door. “What the hell do you two think you’re doing here?”
Nick grins. “We made you and Brian a get-well present!”
I raise my eyebrow. “You and Kevin?”
He nods vigorously. “But you have to guess what it is!”
I roll my eyes. “Um…a metal spork?”
Nick presses his lips together and shakes his head. “Guess again.”
I shrug. “I don’t know.”
He pulls on my sleeve. “C’mon AJ, guess.” he whines, practically dancing with anticipation.
“The Queen of Sheba!” Kevin yells from the couch.
Nick frowns. “You can’t play, Kevin.”
“Fine.” Kevin huffs. “I’m gonna go getta drink then.”
Kevin stumbles in the general direction of the kitchen and Nick turns back to me. “C’mon AJ, one more guess.”
“Chi Chi the happy Mexican lamb?”
Kevin stops and looks at us, hanging onto the wall. “Chi Chi? But Chi Chi’s dead. He got shot…and it was all my fault.” He sniffs and slides down the wall, softly singing. “Chi Chi is a happy little lamb…”
I touch Nick’s shoulder, keeping my voice low. “What the hell is up with him?”
“He started drinking after the ambulance took you and Brian away. Hasn’t really stopped since.” His voice drops to a whisper. “I think he feels bad about what happened, AJ.”
We both look at Kevin, who’s just muttering to himself now, clawing his way up the wall and continuing his trek into the kitchen.
Brian wheels in from the bedroom, wearing a pair of boxers and a t-shirt. His eyes light up when he sees Nick.
“Brian!” Nick squeals, and rushes over to him, enfolding him in a huge hug that lifts him up out of his chair.
Brian laughs. “Whoa Nick, careful. I’m damaged goods, you know.”
Nick stops and drops him back into the wheelchair. “Oops, sorry Bri.”
Brian smiles at him. “It’s fine Nick, I’m glad to see you too. Why’d you stop by?”
“We got a get-well present for you.”
Brian’s brow furrows. “We?”
Kevin staggers out of the kitchen, clutching a beer bottle, but when he sees Brian, he freezes.
Brian’s hands clench tightly on the arms of his wheelchair.
Nick walks over to Kevin and nudges him. “Kevin, don’t you have something to say to Brian?”
Kevin shakes his head, taking a swig of beer. “I ain’t got nothin’ to say.”
Nick pouts and strokes Kevin’s chest with his fingertips. “C’mon Kevin, do it for me?”
Kevin sighs and covers Nick’s hand with his, raising his bleary eyes to Brian’s. “Um…look Brian, I know I was kinda…outta line and all, putting the hit out on you after everything else, but you did try to have me killed and - ”
Nick squeezes Kevin’s hand hard and gives him a warning look.
Kevin looks down. “So, uh yeah…I shouldn’t have done that.”
Nick pats Kevin’s hand and smiles, turning expectantly to Brian.
Brian is tense and silent in his chair, just staring at Kevin. After a long silence he finally says, “The Bible does teach forgiveness, and I do realize now that hiring AJ to kill you in the first place was wrong.”
Kevin looks up at Brian and nods.
Well, neither was much of an apology, but it was sure as hell more than I ever expected out the two of them.
Nick is grinning like an idiot, and tugs on Kevin’s hand. “Let’s do it now. You ready?”
Kevin nods and takes another swig of the beer as Nick leads him over to the sofa.
Me and Brian follow. I pluck him out of his chair and settle him on my lap on the couch, pressing a kiss on the back of his neck. He sighs and settles against my chest, head resting on my shoulder as I wrap my good arm around his waist.
Nick pulls a baseball cap out of his pocket and sets it sideways on his head, then retrieves a pair of sunglasses, sliding them onto his face.
“I hope you like your present.” He grins and pushes the shades up on his nose, crossing his arms, then lifting one up over his head and waving it around. “Yo yo yo! This is Nicky C. Dawg in da house, and I want all of ya’ll to give it up for my nasties, Brian and AJ!”
“Did he just call us nasty?” Brian murmurs in my ear. I chuckle and pat his thigh.
Nick points to Kevin. “Hit it!”
Kevin covers his mouth with both hands and begins to beatbox.
Nick starts to strut around. “What’s my motherfuckin’ name? Check it out foo - must be the Puppy! Yo biatch - step up mah brotha!”
We take you down foo,
Dere ain’t no other
Can open a can of whoop-ass
Like AJ ma brotha!
He can bust hiz gun,
On any bitch in da hood,
He can fuck em’ up right
Cuz he’z just dat dirty good!At this point Nick starts spazzing around the living room, complete with crotch grabbing and ass shaking. “C’mon, shake your B-U-T!”
And when you be needin’ some wrong,
Brotha Brian will hook you up right,
Beat yo sorry ass down
With hiz Bible, aight?
Hangin’ in da Church
Where he be forever mackin’,
Jigga wit da word
Only crosses he be packin’.By this time Brian looks thoroughly confused, Kevin like he’s about to pass out, and I’m just falling off my ass laughing.
Nick grins and crosses his arms, doing some strange symbol with his hands. “Word foo’.”
He bounds over to the sofa. “So didja like it? Kevin helped too.”
“That be some whack shit, yo.” Kevin mumbles, closing his eyes. He begins to snore.
Nick takes off his hat and pushes his hand back through his hair, rolling his eyes. He scampers over and pokes Kevin in the side, getting no response.
Brian sits up and tries to scoot out of my lap, but I tighten my grip around his waist. “I like you here.” I whisper in his ear.
He turns around and smiles at me, running his fingers down my jaw. “Really?”
I nod and nip at his finger. “You’re mine now, remember? You can’t leave.”
He snuggles his head into my shoulder. “Okay.”
I press a kiss on his forehead and his arms wind around me. Nick is looking at us curiously.
I raise my eyebrow at him. “What? You never seen a couple of saps in love before?”
Brian’s smile is like a light next to my heart.
Nick grins and nods. “We should probably go, huh?”
I nod and Nick grabs Kevin, hauling him over his shoulder. “You two have fun. We’ll come back when Kevin’s feeling better.” He winks at us and maneuvers Kevin out the front door.
Brian lifts his head off my chest. “You really meant that? What you said to Nick?”
“I don’t think Nick’s brain could handle anything non-literal.”
Brian grins. “I think Nick knows more than you give him credit for.”
I snort. “Whatever you say, babe.”
He begins to idly play with my nipple, sending a warm glow into my stomach - and lower.
“You’re poking me again.”
I grin. “Don’t pretend you don’t like it.”
He laughs, his face turning mock-serious. “But AJ, that’s wrong!”
I kiss him, deep and open-mouthed, tongue caressing his. He groans into my mouth.
“Now who’s doing the poking?” I ask.
“Just shut up and kiss me again, AJ.”
I’m more than happy to oblige.