A Simple Kiss

Title: A Simple Kiss
Author: Aceetha/Dawn
E-Mail: shyspyke@toowicked.com
Feedback: Eh, DUH!!!!!!! translation....yes please....
Disclaimer: Yeah, lets get this one over with...I don't know the BSB's, don't know their friends, and I'm definitely not one of 'em. If I were, someone's wife should be worried.........I'm just a fan, really I am, who doesn't have a life of her own.
Rating: PG
Pairing: N/B
Summary: How Brian changed Nick's life. Nick's POV.
Notes: Nothing major here. I really can't write smut right now. So it's just gonna be all fluffy and sweet. If you don't like slash, I could say don't read. But it's not that bad, so why not try it anyways

I guess when I think back on it, it really changed my life. It made me see things more clearly. It made me more aware of myself. Oh yeah, it changed me alright.

It was the summer of '99. We were in the middle of our European Millennium Tour. I was nineteen. It seems like such a long time ago, but in reality it's only been about two years. This was the summer so much about me changed.

Since I was 17 I've caught myself looking at other guys. Nothing major, just sneaks here and there. It was always guys I didn't know, and I guess I figured that it was nothing. I had a girl, if not perfect she was good to me. She had some faults, but then again, they all do.

I never really though much about it, until that one day. We were just finishing up the last UK show. During I Want It That Way I found myself staring more at Brian than usually.

Him being my best friend and all, I've seen everything, if you know what I mean. But I've never stared before. This night I did. He was singing the chorus I think, and I got so caught up in the way he moved his lips that I completely forgot to sing along. Luckily for me the fans was singing so loud that no one really noticed. Not even Brian.

Later that night we were talking, me and him. We had been doing that alot lately. Things were starting to get more serious between Mandy and me, and I guess I needed some advice. Once again I felt myself caught up in his lips. The way they moved, the way his tongue moved. I was staring, and he noticed.

I never told anyone that I sometimes found guys attractive. Hey, I was sorta in denial myself, so don't get all riled up. But Brian, he was just, beautiful.

I remember thinking that he was the most beautiful creature I had ever seen. Then I realized he was trying to get my attention.

"Nicky. You alright?"

"yeah" I was still pretty far off. I mean, his lips were moving when he talked, so I couldn't help but stare.

"I'm fine thanks. How are things on your planet?" he said, now sporting one of his trademark grins. And his lips was still moving.

Now this is the part where you tell me to get on with it. You know about the lips, so what now. Nothing major happened. he had to leave a few minutes later. We weren't sharing room. I remember wanting to ask him to stay, but I couldn't find a good reason too. And he would want a reason, after all, I was 19 and supposed to be a man.

I spent the following week trying to not jump his bones. Everytime I saw him I felt like there was no one else in the world but the two of us. Yet somehow I still seemed to find no other men attractive, and I denied to myself that I was gay. Now it was only Brian.

I stared at him alot. When we were changing, gotta love that body. On stage, off stage. Everywhere I could I stared. None of the guys seemed to notice, not even Brian. I could sit for hours imagining how it would feel like if I kissed him.

Before any though like that, about kissing another man I mean, would freak me off, and I'd end up jerking off in the shower thinking about my girl. Now, I welcomed the fantasies. It was always Brian. No one else. Not even Mandy could sneak into my dreams.

I always imagined his tongue feeling so good against my own. His breath being mint fresh, his eyes shining blue and filled with desire. He would lick my lips so softly, begging me to let him in, and I would open my mouth, welcoming him. Our tongues would play, and his hands would stroke my back and ruffle up my hair.

Always the same, always him kissing me. Always him.

I was content with the daydreams. I knew it could never be, and I didn't care, as long as I had my fantasies.

But, that changed.

Me and Brian were playing Playstation. OK, so he was playing and I was watching. I guess I should have known he would find something wrong with that picture. I mean, I'm usually liable to fight someone over the controls. So when I was sitting quietly, another unusual thing by the way, I guess he started to suspect something.

He put down the control, and looked at me.

"Wazzup Nick. You're been so, different lately. Are you alright?"

He looked at me with his blue eyes, and I couldn't help but wanting to kiss him. But I knew that if I so much as tried he would never forgive me. But I wanted to so bad.

"I'm fine" I said.

I guess he saw something in my eyes, or it was the tone of my voice. Or maybe he had known all along, read the looks I gave him, the way I behaved, and put two and two together.

I mean, he was always good in math. I would probably manage to get five, but lets not get into that ok.

It doesn't matter how he knew. All that matters is that he did. For a few seconds he stared into my eyes. Then he smiled, and leaned forward, closing his eyes as his face came closer and closer to mine.

Time stood still, as he changed my life forever. He changed the way I looked at things. I see more clearly now. I see what am, and that there is nothing I can do to change that. I dumped Mandy a long time ago. She wasn't good for me anyways.

Brian changed it all with a simple kiss.