Three months later, I overheard Cory on the phone with Nick. "Tell Nick I said Hi, and to tell Kevin Hi for me." I said casually as I walked through the room.

"Say Hi to him yourself." she replied and then frowned into the receiver, "Why?" she asked Nick, pausing to listen to his response. "How many is that 4, 5?"

My heart dropped to my stomach and I held my breath to steady myself. "What's up?" I asked, hoping I sounded only politely concerned.

"Just the normal." She replied sarcastically. "Kevin gets his heart stomped on again and Nick gets to babysit him while he drowns his sorrows in a bottle of something or other. What a loser." She looked at me cautiously, "Oh, sorry. That was just a one time thing with you two, wasn't it? I mean you wouldn't actually be thinking that he'd really come back for you or anything."

"No, Cory, I'm not that naive." I lied to myself as much as to her. "I just think he's really nice and I don't want to see him trying to drink away a broken heart. Ask Nick if Kevin will talk to me."

Cory gave me a disgusted look. "If you're finally interested in a boyfriend, I'll give you a dozen better than him."

I shook my head and held out my hand for the phone.

"Nick says it's not a good idea right now. Kevin is pretty drunk and really pissed off." She covered the phone with her hand. "I think he even scares Nick when he's like this."

"Remember you guys owe me for "distracting" Kevin when you wanted your send-off party." I reminded them. "Consider this part of my repayment." With a shrug, she passed me the phone. "Hi, Nick. Can I please talk to Kevin?"

"You don't realize what you're getting into." Nick warned.

"Thanks for the warning. Please let me talk to him."

I heard Nick tell Kevin to be nice as he passed the phone to him. Kevin cursed him out in a flurry of slurred obscenities and I imagined that at that moment he looked something like that photo in the magazine that now had a special place in my wallet.

"Hi Kev."

"Hi." he replied cautiously.

He sounded so lost. I closed my eyes wishing I could make him feel better. "You OK?"

"Do you really care?" He was trying unsuccessfully not to slur his words.

"Yeah, I do. Wanna talk?"

"You fucking lie!" He yelled, his voice hard with anger. "Why would you say you care unless you want something from me? You like all the others? Y'all think if you fuck a Backstreet Boy you'll own the world!"

"Kev, if all I wanted to do was fuck you, why didn't I take you upstairs the night we met?" I countered. My question was met with silence and I wondered if he was thinking or had passed out. "You were drunk enough for me to take advantage of you." I continued, again waiting for some reaction. "I could have had anything I wanted."

"Why didn't you?" he asked bitterly. "Hoping to use me to get to the golden boy here instead?"

"Sorry, he's not my type. Actually, I was rather enjoying finding out how wrong all those kiddie magazines are about you. I like the real Kevin much better than the imaginary one." I closed my eyes and pictured his sweet smile.

I was surprised when he sighed softly instead of yelling. "Thanks." His voice was thoughtful and he appeared to be trying to figure something out. "Tell me something." He hesitated and then asked, "If I were back in town for just one night, what would be your perfect evening? I mean like a date?"

I thought for a second. "Playing on the boardwalk, walking hand in hand on the moonlit beach, curling up with you in a blanket on the sand to watch fireworks, then just hanging out and talking until the sun came up and I had to give you back to your fans again."

He burst out laughing. "No fancy French restaurant or expensive gifts or big industry party?"

"Sorry, I guess I'm boring compared to what you're used to but..."

"No, it sounds like real fun." He paused and I heard Nick in the background. "I'm sorry but I gotta go now. Got another plane to catch."

"Kev, next time, call me instead of a bartender, OK?"

He laughed softly. "You can count on it."

~~~~

The next morning was hectic as we prepared to great the guests for my uncle's big 4th of July party at our beach house. I wanted to have Cory call Nick to find out how Kevin was but she and I were on totally different schedules and guests were already at the house before I saw her. Since she was surrounded by friends, I resigned myself to the fact that the call would have to wait until later.

I wandered through the party, being the good hostess until evening when I found myself on an empty balcony. I watched Cory and her friends on the beach below, knowing she would laugh at me if she knew I was still alone at a party with dozens of eligible men, but the only one I wanted to be with was Kevin. Suddenly strong hands covered my eyes and I whirled around defensively ready to tell another one of Cory's friends that I was not interested. My breath caught in my throat when I came face to face with Kevin.

He burst out laughing, hands still on my shoulders, "I was going to say "surprise" but I think "breathe" is more appropriate right now."

I let out the breath that I was holding and blushed. "Hi! Surprise is an understatement! Aren't you supposed to be on tour?"

His smile faded. He shook his head and looked at the floor. "I quit." He said quietly. "I can't do it anymore. Yesterday was the last straw."

I put my hand on his arm. "You quit Backstreet?"

He nodded without looking up, long dark hair covering his face and hiding his eyes. "No going back. And, no, I don't want to talk about it and don't ask what I'm going to do now. I don't even want to think about it right now. I just don't want to be famous anymore."

"As long as you find something that makes you happy, it'll work out." I assured him as I pushed the hair off his face. He raised his eyes to meet mine, searching for something I could not identify. As he pulled me into a tight hug, he whispered "Thank you" against my neck and shivers ran down my spine.

I could have stayed there with his arms wrapped around me forever but he suddenly took my hand and wove his fingers with mine. "Come on. I owe you a walk on the beach." We kicked off our shoes and wandered the private beach, talking and enjoying each other's company.

As the sun set, we grabbed a blanket from the house and found a quiet spot down the beach where we could watch the fireworks away from the rest of the party. He flopped down on the blanket and sprawled out on his back, his hands behind his head. My breath caught in my throat and I couldn't help stare at the way the moonlight danced across the muscles of his bare chest and arms, the way his dark shorts rode low on his hips. All I could think of was how lucky those women had been to make love to him, and the heat between my legs spread as I remember how he had responded to my touch that night at the club. I blushed when I realized he was watching me, wondering if he knew what I was thinking.

He offered me his hand, a sly smile across his face. "If you don't start breathing soon, I'll be forced to give you mouth to mouth."

Defiantly I put my hands on my hips and exaggerated holding my breath. Grabbing my arm, he pulled me down onto the blanket with him, quickly quieting my laughter as he brought his mouth to mine, his tongue eagerly seeking entrance. I wrapped my hands in his hair as his tongue stroked mine sensually and his hands moved to fondle my breasts through my thin sundress.

I broke the kiss. "Kevin, I need to tell you something."

His defenses immediately went up and he pulled back with a hurt look. "Kev, I should have told you this before. I'm sorry. I just didn't know how." How was I supposed to explain this to him? He had been with so many experienced women. I'd read the Harlequin romances and listened to the stories at school and at the nightclub but I knew that was no substitute for experience.

"Just say it." He said dejectedly without looking at me.

His eyes closed as I gently brushed the hair off his face. "I've never done this before, never been with a man before." I blurted out, closing my eyes so I wouldn't have to see his disappointment. "Even though I'm 18 now, I'm still a virgin. Until I met you, there was never anyone I wanted to be with."

"What?" He was puzzled. I wasn't sure what he thought I was going to say but this was obviously not it. "But that night on the dance floor?"

"Was the first time I ever touched a man that way." I confessed.

I was forcing myself not to cry thinking this was the part where he was going to say goodbye little girl. "I want to be with you, Kev, and I don't mean the famous Backstreet Boy, not the imaginary man in the magazines, just you." To my surprise, he pulled me closer, burying his face in my neck and whispering, "I want to be with you. I love you."

He kissed up my neck. "Please let me make love to you." he murmured in my ear. Like I was going to say no. I had been dreaming of this ever since the night I met him.

He brought his mouth to mine in a heated kiss. I could feel his erection pressing into my hip, straining at his shorts. My body was on fire and I whimpered as he lifted my sundress and trailed his fingers down my panties.

I wrapped one hand in his hair and deepened the kiss further. My other hand trailed down his chest, relishing the feel of his tight muscles under his smooth skin, the way he trembled under my touch and sucked in a sharp breath as my fingers played with his nipples. His shorts were off in a matter of seconds and he guided my hand to his throbbing erection, gasping as I gently wrapped my fingers around it.

For a minute, he lost himself in the pleasure of my touch, moaning low and deep as I stroked him. Then he took control and started kissing from my stomach up to my breasts, taking one and then the other into his mouth as he removed my panties. He covered my mouth with his to muffle my screams as his fingers gently stroked my folds before moving on top of me then hesitated. "Are you sure?" His voice was low and husky with desire.

I nodded, not trusting my voice, and closed my eyes. Slowly he pressed his erection into me, pausing when he had filled me with his hardness to make sure I was alright. Forcing myself to forget the initial pain, I opened my eyes and focused on him. I realized that he was shaking as he struggled to keep maintain control and not thrust into me until he was sure I was ready. His eyes were clenched tight and his breath was coming in shallow gasps as I felt his erection pulse inside me.

I reached up to touch his face and rocked my hips slowly against him, the breath he held escaping in a desperate moan. He began to move gently in and out, setting such a slow pace that his moan changed to a whimper as he fought to stay in control. Almost before I realized what had happened, a feeling of warmth and pleasure started coursing through my body and I matched his thrusts with my own, sending him into a frenzy. The pleasure built in my body until he took me over the edge, screaming his name as he covered my mouth with his. Seconds later his body tensed with his own orgasm as he buried his face in my neck, my name on his lips.

He rolled onto his back, pulling me onto his chest and wrapping us in the blanket. He kissed my head and sighed sadly. I raised my head to look at him, the first fireworks lighting up his face and reflecting the worry in his eyes. "What's wrong, Kev?"

He closed his eyes. "I need to tell you something. I hope you can forgive me." He took a deep breath "Please don't be mad but...I didn't quit Backstreet...I was testing you. I just needed to be sure that you wanted to be with the real me. And the timing just worked out right. Your uncle invited us to this party months ago. All the guys are here tonight." His voice wavered. "I'm sorry."

"It's OK, I understand." I breathed a sigh of relief as the pieces fell into place.

"You forgive me?" he asked hopefully.

"Already done." I leaned down to kiss him just as we heard footsteps running up the beach behind us and Nick yelling. "There you are! You're supposed to be at the house for the fireworks. You know, Kevin, we need to buy you a new watch. You..." Kevin raised his hand and Nick's words were lost in the echo of the fireworks that lit up the beach...and us...just long enough for Nick to realize what he interrupting.

"...are very busy." Kevin finished Nick's sentence and waved him away, laughing against my mouth as his tongue already searched for mine. Nick headed back toward the house, then turned and laughed. "Now be good, kids. Don't do anything I wouldn't do!"

"See you in the morning, Nick." Kevin smiled softly and leaned in to bring his lips to mine again. "Not many times you get a second chance to make a first impression."