The knock on his hotel door woke him with a start. Justin glanced at the clock and groaned. It was two in the morning. He had to be in the studio by eight. This better be important. Pushing the covers off, he climbed out of bed, not bothering with throwing on anymore clothes then the boxers he was already wearing. It was someone he knew, he was sure of that. He was in the penthouse suite that needed key access in the elevator to reach it and he had bodyguards positioned by the elevators and the staircases. No one that didn’t belong would get through.
“This better be important,” he said, pulling the door open. But any anger was curbed immediately and any more words were pushed back down in his throat. Because JC was standing there, bag in one hand. He looked tired, but there was a smile on his face. It was two in the morning and JC was standing at his hotel room door in Virginia Beach.
“Hope I’m important enough,” JC said with a grin, shifting his weight from one foot to another.
“What are you doing here?” Justin asked, opening the door wider and ushering JC inside. “And you know you’re important enough.” JC tossed his bag to the side and slipped out of his jacket, laying it on top the bag.
“I missed you, man. And I wanted to hear how the album was coming. Sorry it’s so late. I would have been here earlier but the plane was delayed due to weather. It’s like a tsunami in LA today.” Justin smiled and stepped closer to JC, reaching out to pull him close, wrapping his arms around him in a tight hug.
“I’m glad you’re here.”
Justin didn’t really care anymore that it was the middle of the night and he had to be up early the next morning. It’d been far too long since he and JC had time to just sit down and hang out together. Too much had happened within the past four months and neither of them had the time. But sitting here now, JC leaning against one armrest of the couch and Justin against the other, their legs spread out between them, Justin realized that even with everything they’d been through, they’d never grown apart.
It was as comfortable and easy as it always had been being with JC, even with all the feelings running through Justin’s heart and mind. They talked and laughed and joked and just caught up on each other’s lives. Finally, Justin couldn’t hold it in any longer.
“So how are you doing? Since Adam I mean.”
“I’m good.” JC smiled brightly. “Just wasn’t meant to be. I liked him, but I’ve moved on.” He shrugged easily and Justin saw the truth in his eyes.
“Just like that, huh? It was that easy to move on? Does it always work like that for you?” The words were harsh, but Justin’s tone was far from harsh. Instead, he sounded a little sad and JC looked up him curiously.
“What’s that suppose to mean?”
“Nothing, forget I said it.” Justin said, shifting on the couch self-consciously under JC’s gaze.
“No, man. What’d you mean by that?” Justin looked up at JC from under his lashes, their eyes meeting briefly before Justin had to look away again. He pulled at a string hanging from the pillow on his lap, tearing it off and dropping it onto the ground before meeting JC’s eyes again.
“I just wondered if you got over me that easily.” He saw, more than heard, JC sigh and look away.
“Justin, please don’t do that. We’ve been having such a good time. I don’t want this conversation to end like almost every other conversation we’ve had in the past few months. There’s always this tension between us when it’s over. I don’t want that anymore. I miss just being able to have fun with you.” Justin shook his head, stopping JC’s words as he reached out, sliding his hand along JC’s knee and squeezing gently.
“I didn’t mean it like that. I guess I just really am curious. I mean, how easy was it to get over me? As easily as you’re over Adam?” JC sighed and let his hand rest on top of Justin’s, sliding his thumb over the soft skin.
“Truth?” JC asked. Justin nodded. “You and Adam don’t even compare. Adam isn’t someone I’ve known for eleven years. He’s not someone I’ve loved on some level for more than a decade. He’s not my best friend.” JC pulled away from Justin’s hand, pulling his knees up to his chest and resting his chin on them. “Truth is, I started dating Adam to get over you, but it didn’t quite work.”
Before Justin could stop himself, before he’d even really comprehended what he was doing, he slid across the couch until he was up against JC. There was no hesitation as he leaned in and pressed his lips to JC’s. His hand came up, cupping JC’s cheek, tilting his head. It was everything he remembered their first kiss to be, but this time without the confusion, without the doubt. He loved this man, and he was finally ready to admit that to him.
But this time, after only moments, it was JC pulling away, ducking his head away from Justin’s hand. When JC looked up at him, Justin saw hurt in his eyes and his heart clenched painfully in his chest.
“Please, Justin. Not again.” Justin struggled not to throw himself at JC, not to pull him into a tight embrace and never let him go.
“No, JC. This isn’t like last time.” He reached out hesitantly for JC’s hand, but stopped short when he noticed the pain still in JC’s eyes.
“You know how I feel about you. It hurt so much last time. I can’t go through that again,” JC said, shifting away from Justin as much as possible against the side of the couch.
“I was an idiot last time,” Justin said, backing away slightly. He hated that look in JC’s eyes. Hated that he’d been the one to put it there, more than once. “I realized, too late, that I do love you. And that I want to be with you. You asked me why I didn’t like Adam. The truth is it was because he had you and I didn’t. I was jealous. It just took you having a boyfriend for me to figure it out.” He saw the hesitation shift across JC’s face, the questions shimmering in his eyes, so he continued. “I love you, JC. And I’m so sorry I had to hurt you to figure that out. But I know it now, I’m sure of it. And this isn’t something I’m going to get scared of and back away from in a couple of days.”
“You mean that?” There was still a serious amount of hesitation in JC’s eyes, in his voice. And as Justin nodded, he wished more than anything that he could make that go away. “So what do we do now?”
“How about I kiss you again,” Justin said after thinking about it for a short moment. “Then, we go into the bedroom and go to sleep together. And when we wake up tomorrow, we’ll take it from there.” He finally let his hand rest on JC’s leg again, seeing the hesitation slowly draining from his face. “I’m ready for this, Jace. I want this. I want you. And we can take this as fast or as slow as you want. It’s your call now.” JC’s hand fell on top of Justin’s, their fingers intertwining and finally a smile appeared on JC’s face.
“A kiss sounds good.” And as Justin leaned in to slide his lips over JC’s, as JC’s tongue came out, licking at Justin’s bottom lip until he was granted access, Justin couldn’t agree more.