A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's doing a show in a small club in a small town in Arkansas. With his dummy on his knee, he's going through his usual dumb blonde jokes when a blonde woman in the 4th row stands on her chair and starts shouting: "I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of a person's hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community and from reaching our full potential as a person... because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against, not only blondes, but women in general...and all in the name of humor!" The ventriloquist is embarrassed and begins to apologize, when the blonde yells, "You stay out of this, mister! I'm talking to that little bastard on your knee!"
A sweet young thing gets to a soft drink machine just ahead of a businessman who wants to quench his thirst. She opens her purse and puts in 50 cents, studies the buttons for a short time, pushes a Diet Coke selection and out comes a Diet Coke. She puts it on the counter by the machine. Then she reaches into her purse again, takes out a dollar and inserts it in the machine. She examines the buttons carefully, then pushes the button for Coke Classic. Out comes a Coke Classic and 50 cents change. She immediately takes the change and puts it in the machine, studies the buttons for a moment and pushes the Mountain Dew button. Out pops a Mountain Dew. As she is reaching into her purse again, the thirsty businessman says, "Excuse me, miss, but are you putting more money in?" She looks at him and replies indignantly, "Well, duhhh. I'm still winning."
