Shrub Men



It was a warm sunny morning in Orlando. The O-Town guys were all asleep except Dan who had just woken up in his bed. He pushed back his Pokemon quilt, pulled up his undies and quietly got out of bed. He was trying to be quiet as not to wake up Jacob who had crept into the room in the middle of the night for monkey business with thriller miller. He put his monster feet down onto the wooden floorboards and was as quiet as a mouse. No wait he saw a mouse run across the floor and jumped quickly making the floor creak when he landed. Jacob looked up and removed the mask covering his eyes.
'Dan! what the hell are you doing? You keep me up all night then wake me this early?'
'sorry sir! ......i mean Jesus.....sorry Jacob'
'Yeah you will be boy.Now go make me some tea, theres some newly planted herbs in the garden, i suggest you pick some'
'Yes master' replied Dan as he headed outside.
Just then Ashley stirred in his bed shared by Erik.
'Hey baby' he whispered as he planted a gentle kiss on his superman poster, 'hey Erik' he said.
'Hi Ashley....hey what am I doing here?'he asked
'Oh well after our long nightly 'talk' you kinda fell asleep and you looked so peaceful I didnt want to wake you. We're tight ya know'
'Well thanks' smiled Erik as he got out of the bed and pulled on some pants. Ashley walked into the front room to see Dan rushing about in the kitchen. He had only his blue pinstripe apron on and a very tiny pair of y fronts. He slipped on a pice of banana that he was keeping for later, hit his head on the steel taps and landed in a heap on the floor. Althought he was in pain and looked like a complete poof when he began to cry he carried on, nothing was worse than Jacob mad.
'Hey Daniel has my superman comic come yet?'
'No' he moaned ' but your rocket science has' he said holding up a copy of Ashley favourite magazine.
'Wow, ive been waiting for that!' he exclaimed as he snatched the magazine and ran off to his office to complete his experimentation on his space ship that he had built to see if the truth really was out there.
Trevor emerged from his pit an hour later to find Ashley strapping Erik to some kind of space machine, Dan was cowering in a corner and Jacob who was in ripped clothes, had turned green and grown a 16 pac was heading in his direction.
'Hey whats going on?' asked Trevor
'Im sending Erik to uranus' smiled Ashley happy that he wasnt the butt of the joke for once.
'My anus? I dont think so Ash' said a scared Trevor backing away
'Not your a$$! The planet Uranus you fool'
'Oh i see, ok then, full speed ahead!'
Once Erik was strapped in and ready to go the other 4 guys all stood round him and recited a prayer that was led by Jacob.
'Ok this is it!' shouted Ashley
5......4...............3..............2.....................................1............BLAST OFF!!!'
The rocket shook and so did the house.
'Hey i thought Lou wasnt gonna come round here anymore after the peanut butter and haircutting incident!' exclaimed Trevor.
'Trev......go back to bed m8' said Dan. So he trundled off, put on his Tots TV jammies and got into bed.
Meanwhile Erik shot off into space leaving behind a tearful Dan, a fed up Jacob and a very proud Ashley. It was his dream to send something into space........and he had...so they all went back inside and went to bed.8 years later and there was a crash outisde the O-Town house. 'What the hell?' cried Trevor as they all rushed outside.
'Oh my gosh! its that Erik guy i sent off into space 8 years ago!' screamed Ashley.
'Hey guys' smiled Erik who was now green and pink, wearing a yellow tunic and had brought along friends for the occasion.
'We come in peace' he said , then turning to his friends said something in another language which made them all hop on one leg and shout Shrubbery. All of the guys and shrubmen went into the house and enjoyed pot noodles and lucozade until 8pm when they all had to return home. Erik went back with the shrubmen as it was now his home. The other 4 guys were forced to carry on as a foursome and live a life of lemonade.
~~~~The End~~~~~© Beccy.T 2001/2002

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