Nick tried his best to make Debelah laugh, but she didn’t even crack a smile. “C’mon, Deb, please cheer up,” he pleaded with her. All day long she’d been walking around in a depressed daze, looking like she’d lost all hope.
She sighed, “I’m sorry, Nick. I’m not a very good guest.” She continued to stare at the fireplace as she talked. She stood up. “I’m going to go to bed.”
Now it was Nick’s turn to sigh, running a hand through his hair, “OK, I hope you feel better in the morning.” He watched her walk out of the room before turning his attention back to the tv.
Up in Nick’s lush guest room, Debelah shut the door behind her and made her way to the balcony without turning on the light. She stared at sky as she sat railing, her feet dangling. She felt so numb. She was used to using this trick of going numb when she felt really hurt so she wouldn’t have to deal with all the painful emotions. But now she realized that it was worse to feel nothing, to feel completely hollow inside. A tear slipped unnoticed down her cheek as she wondered what Alex was doing. Was he sorry? Did he even know what really happened? Did he miss her at all? Did he still…love her?
Debelah shook her head. She couldn’t deal with these thoughts. She had to get out of here. Glancing around she saw the strip of latticework on the side of the house next to the balcony with ivy creeping on it. She went back into the room, grabbed the keys and, holding them between her teeth, made her way down the latticework.
-------@-------@---
Several hours later, Nick turned off the tv ready to get some sleep. He groaned as he stood from his lying position. “What the hell? I’m not even old yet,” he muttered as he stretched. Making his way up to his room, he decided to stop by Debelah’s room to make sure she was doing alright. He knocked on the door first but she didn’t answer so he cautiously opened the door and peeked in. At first glance he didn’t see anything so he stepping in and walked to the middle of the room looking around. The bed was make and bedspread flat. The only thing out of place was her three bags leaning against the dresser.
“Must’ve wondered around the house,” he said out loud and turned to go find her.
Twenty minutes later he was hurrying around the first floor, feeling desperate. She wasn’t anywhere in the house. He checked in the backyard. No Debelah. He went around to the front yard.
“Debe-“he stopped short.
Her rental car was missing.
He ran back inside. With the mood she was in, he had no idea where she’d gone. And he had every reason to worry with the way she’d been feeling lately. He ran back inside to the phone. Brian and Kevin had taken Roslynn home to Kentucky, but he called them anyway. They said worriedly that they hadn’t heard a word from Debelah. Same luck with Howie. Now he had to call someone who he didn’t want to talk to, but might be the only person to help. He dialed AJ’s cell phone.
“ ‘lo?” his gravely voice asked.
Nick rushed, “AJ, its Nick. Have you seen Debelah?”
AJ gave a short laugh devoid of humor, “Why would I have seen Debelah? It’s not as it she wants to see- wait, aren’t YOU supposed to be with her?”
“Yeah, but she said she was going to bed around 8 and I went to check on her around midnight and she wasn’t in her room. The car’s gone, the liquor cabinet is open and I don’t know where she went. I’ve called the rest of the guys and they haven’t heard from her and-“
“Wait, wait a damn minute,” AJ interrupted now sounding panicked. “Are you telling me that Deb’s MISSING?!”
“Yes!”
“I thought YOU were supposed to be with her,” he accused Nick.
“Well, excuse me, but she was a bit fuckin’ upset!” Nick yelled.
“I’ll be there in ten minutes,” AJ hung up.
--------@--------@-----
At a quarter to one, a gray car pulled into the driveway, parking hesitantly. Debelah rested her head on the steering wheel and tried to will the world to stop spinning around her. She stepped out the car with the ¾ empty large vodka bottle in her hand and turned awkwardly to go into the house. Nick hurried out, eyes widening when he saw her.
“Debelah, where have you been? Are you alright? Why on earth- what the hell happened to the car?! Deb?”
She blinked a few times looking confused and turned her head to look at the car. The front end was pretty banged up. The headlights were broken and nose of the car was all crumpled up. She shrugged, needing to reach for the garage door for balance. “I dunno,” she slurred.
Nick noticed the vodka bottle, looked at the car and back at Debelah. “Debelah, did you hit a car?”
“Pssshhh….no. It wasn’t a car. A wall, I think. Yeah…wall.” She pushed off the wall and started to walk unsteadily towards the front door. As she passed, Nick noticed a dark stain on the side of her forehead, running down to her neck. He grabbed her upper arm, “Deb, what happened to your-“
With a cry, she yanked her arm away, almost falling over. “Don’t grab me!” As Nick stared at her in surprise, she yelled, “I’m so goddamn SICK of being grabbed! That ALL I ever get. And I- no one-“ she stopped with a choked sob and covered her mouth, eyes wide. “Oh, god. I’m sorry, Nick. I didn’t mean it.”
“I know, Deb, I know,” Nick said, trying to lead her into the house. “Why don’t you just go up to your room and try to get some rest?”
Debelah nodded, stumbling up the steps to the house and then up the steps to her room. Holding onto the wall for balance, she took swigs from the bottle on the way up to try and stop the urge to cry. Her legs criss crossed themselves multiple times on the way up the stairs. Finally she made it into her room and she shut the door, putting the bottle on the dresser. She peeled off her clothes and replaced them with a long t-shirt from her bag and panties. She sniffed the shirt; it smelled like AJ’s cologne. Her eyes felt hot again and cursed aloud before grabbing the bottle again and taking a long drink. She’d had enough so that it didn’t burn her throat. She heard a noise coming from the balcony and turned.
“Goddamnit, what now?” she said to herself. But then she saw the figure standing in the doorway between the room and the balcony. It was turned towards her but it was dark in the room and with her blurry vision she couldn’t tell who it was.
“It’s gonna be another fuckin’ creep and I’ll need another bottle,” she muttered under her breath as she walked closer, bottle in hand.
The moon must have come out from behind the clouds then because half of his face was bathed in moonlight and he was staring straight at her.
“AJ?” Debelah whispered, not believing it was him. His eyes looked about as bloodshot as she was sure hers were. She noticed his stubbled jawline and wrinkled clothes, the way his hair looked like he’d been running his hands though it.
She adverted her eyes, “Why are you here?”
He was quiet several moments longer, staring at her in the large shirt she’d slept in next to him one night, her beautiful hair all messed up. His eyes narrowed as he saw the alcohol bottle in her hand. “Nick called me. Said he couldn’t find you, didn’t know where you went. Where were you?” he asked lowly.
“I don’t know.” She brought her eyes back up to him. “Why do you care?”
AJ took a deep breath and stepped forward. “I do care, Deb. I care about you.”
Debelah laughed bitterly and turned to sit on the bed. “Yeah right.”
AJ rushed forward. “Deb I know you’re mad and you have every right to be, but I DO care about you.”
She sat on the edge of the bed and looked at skeptically. “Yeah, that’s why you believed that I cheated on you, especially with Bruce. That’s why you left me in that room with him. That’s why you wouldn’t listen to me and that’s why you shoved me against a wall. Because you CARE about me,” she practically spat that word out. “You LEFT ME in there. He ATTACKED me and I couldn’t get away. I was screaming for help, screaming for you but YOU didn’t come,” her voice started to choke so she turned her head, taking a sip from the bottle.
“I didn’t know, I thought…I was wrong,” he crouched down to her level in front of the bed and put a hand on her knee. He was hating himself more and more. He had left her there. That bastard attacked her. Worse of all, he wasn’t there to help her.
She knocked his hand off. “Don’t touch me,” she said shakily, making his heart drop even more. “You weren’t there. He pushed me down on the ground and I couldn’t get up. Kevin had to get him off me. I couldn’t…he was too strong.”
AJ didn’t know who he hated more, Bruce or himself. Debelah stood and walked to the other side of the room, pacing on the carpet. There were frown lines between her eyebrows as she started at the floor and hugged the bottle to her chest. AJ slowly stood and she stopped and looked at him.
“I dunno what to do,” she said, her voice starting to slur again. She pushed her hair away form her face, feeling exhausted now from the alcohol and emotions. “I love you, but right now I hate you.”
AJ released a breath of air that felt like it’d been stuck for the last few days, “You still love me, though?”
“If I didn’t love you, it wouldn’t hurt this bad,” Debelah said, looking at the floor.
“Can I talk to you? Can I tell you why I acted that way? Can I please, for the love of God, TRY to apologize to you?” he basically pleaded.
Debelah raised her head, catching a ray of moonlight on her face, and nodded, “I’m listening.”
And that’s when AJ saw the blood.