Tyr's Domain

Various Quotes and Meanderings of the Famous and not so Famous

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."
- Albert Einstein

"I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use."
- Galileo Galilei

"Don't be humble. You're not that great."
- Golda Meir

"Mothers are fonder than fathers of their children because they are more certain they are their own."
- Aristotle

"Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life."
- Brooke Shields

"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one."
- Albert Einstein

"When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before."
- Mae West

"I have never let my schooling interfere with my education."
- Mark Twain

"The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other is ready."
- Henry David Thoreau

"It's a long story"
- Courtney Bruesch

"Yeah, Yeah, Trippy, Bad"
- Jeff Goldblumm

"I'd believe it"
- Ana Wilcox

"Embrace life with all your heart, for it is often the only gift we have"
- Tyler Wilcox

"Spiritualism is a Religion, Science & Philosophy of Truth, Light & Nature"
- Spiritualist National Union

"They're funny things Accidents. You never have them till you're haveing them."
- Eeyore The House at Pooh Corner(From Eeyores Gloomy little instruction book)

"This writing business - pencils and what-not - is overrated. Silly stuff. Nothing in it"
- Eeyore Eeyores Gloomy little instruction book

"Christianity naturally, but why journalism?"
- Arthur James Balfour

"Cocaine isn't habit-forming. I should know - I've been using it for years."
- Tallulah Bankhead

"USER, n.: The word computer professionals use when they mean 'idiot.'"
- Dave Barry

"If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there are men on base."
- Dave Barry

"We Americans live in a nation where the medical-care system is second to none in the world, unless you count maybe 25 or 30 little scuzzball countries like Scotland that we could vaporize in seconds if we felt like it."
- Dave Barry

"Karate is a form of martial arts in which people who have had years and years of training can, using only their hands and feet, make some of the worst movies in the history of the world."
- Dave Barry

"To me old age is always fifteen years older than I am."
- Bernard Mannes Baruch

"Chatfield, there seems to be something wrong with our bloody ships today."
- Vice-Admiral Earl Beatty, Attr. On sinking of battle-cruisers at Battle of Jutland, 30 May 1916

ESTRAGON: . . . Let's go.
VLADIMIR: We can't.
ESTRAGON: Why not?
VLADIMIR: We're waiting for Godot.
- Samuel Beckett

"A musicologist is a man who can read music but can't hear it."
- Sir Thomas Beecham

"You will think me lamentably crude: my experience of life has been drawn from life itself."
- Max Beerbohm

"Life is too short for traffic."
- Dan Bellack

"Journalists say a thing that they know isn't true, in the hope that if they keep on saying it long enough it will be true."
- Arnold Bennett

"It's like deja vu all over again."
- Yogi Berra

"Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours."
- Yogi Berra

"The future isn't what it used to be."
- Yogi Berra

"There is no revenge so complete as forgiveness."
- Josh Billings

JUDGE: You are offensive,
SIR. F. E. S.: We both are; the difference is that I'm trying to be and you can't help it.
- F. E. Smith, Earl of Birkenhead

"When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping. Man invade another country. It's a whole different way of thinking."
- Elayne Boolser

"I am about to - or I am going to - die; either expression is used."
- Dominique Bouhours

"God runs electromagnetics by wave theory on Monday, Wednesday,and Friday, and the Devil runs them by quantum theory on Tuesday,Thursday, and Saturday."
- William Bragg

"Beware of programmers who carry screw drivers."
- Leonard Brandwein

"The best computer is a man, and it's the only one that can be mass-produced by unskilled labor."
- Warner von Braun

"I either want less corruption, or more chance to participate in it."
- Ashleigh Brilliant

"My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I'm right."
- Ashleigh Brilliant

"To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target."
- Ashleigh Brilliant

"Marriage is not just spiritual communion, it is also remembering to take out the trash."
- Dr. Joyce Brothers

"No matter how love-sick a woman is, she shouldn't take the first pill that comes along."
- Dr. Joyce Brothers

"The Internet is so big, so powerful and pointless that for some people it is a complete substitute for life."
- Andrew Brown

"You can't get out of life alive."
- Les Brown

"If the world were a logical place, men would ride side saddle."
- Rita Mae Brown

"Virginia Woolf said that writers must be androgynous. I'll go a step further. You must be bisexual."
- Rita Mae Brown

"Writers will happen in the best of families."
- Rita Mae Brown

"It's an act of faith to be a writer in a postliterate world."
- Rita Mae Brown

"Lead me not into temptation; I can find the way myself."
- Rita Mae Brown

Food Item - Other/Non-Meat:
Slim Jim Beef Jerky Stick
- Champaign City Police Report

"Half-steps are the key to the meaning of life"
- Fred Stolzfutz

"Yeah, if I were the son of God, I think I would feel pretty sexy too."
- Me, in reference to Jesus.com

"Tyler makes masturbation fun again"
- Yvonne, Daily Illini Development Editor

"We fucked up, but they fucked up more."
- Me, regarding the Illinois vs. Penn State game

"No one wants to die with out broadness"
- Dan Hughes