<xmp> <body><!--'"</title></head>--> <script type="text/javascript"> //OwnerIQ var __oiq_pct = 50; if( __oiq_pct>=100 || Math.floor(Math.random()*100/(100-__oiq_pct)) > 0 ) { var _oiqq = _oiqq || []; _oiqq.push(['oiq_addPageBrand','Lycos']); _oiqq.push(['oiq_addPageCat','Internet > Websites']); _oiqq.push(['oiq_addPageLifecycle','Intend']); _oiqq.push(['oiq_doTag']); (function() { var oiq = document.createElement('script'); oiq.type = 'text/javascript'; oiq.async = true; oiq.src = document.location.protocol + '//px.owneriq.net/stas/s/lycosn.js'; var s = document.getElementsByTagName('script')[0]; s.parentNode.insertBefore(oiq, s); })(); } /////// Google Analytics var _gaq = _gaq || []; _gaq.push(['_setAccount', 'UA-21402695-21']); _gaq.push(['_setDomainName', 'angelfire.com']); _gaq.push(['_setCustomVar', 1, 'member_name', 'poetry/tartarus', 3]); _gaq.push(['_trackPageview']); (function() { var ga = document.createElement('script'); ga.type = 'text/javascript'; ga.async = true; ga.src = ('https:' == document.location.protocol ? 'https://ssl' : 'http://www') + '.google-analytics.com/ga.js'; var s = document.getElementsByTagName('script')[0]; s.parentNode.insertBefore(ga, s); })(); ////// Lycos Initialization ///////////////////// var lycos_ad = Array(); var lycos_search_query = ""; var lycos_onload_timer; var cm_role = "live"; var cm_host = "angelfire.lycos.com"; var cm_taxid = "/memberembedded"; var angelfire_member_name = "poetry/tartarus"; var angelfire_member_page = "poetry/tartarus/saq.htm"; var angelfire_ratings_hash = "1767153436:0163255b09996e72fda42405e12b4eb8"; var lycos_ad_category = {"dmoz":"arts\/animation","ontarget":"&CAT=family%20and%20lifestyles&L2CAT=hobbies","find_what":"about popup window"}; var lycos_ad_remote_addr = "209.202.244.9"; var lycos_ad_www_server = "www.angelfire.lycos.com"; var edit_site_url = "www.angelfire.lycos.com/landing/landing.tmpl?utm_source=house&utm_medium=landingpage&utm_campaign=toolbarlink"; </script> <script type="text/javascript" src="https://scripts.lycos.com/catman/init.js"></script> <script type='text/javascript'> var googletag = googletag || {}; googletag.cmd = googletag.cmd || []; (function() { var gads = document.createElement('script'); gads.async = true; gads.type = 'text/javascript'; var useSSL = 'https:' == document.location.protocol; gads.src = (useSSL ? 'https:' : 'http:') + '//www.googletagservices.com/tag/js/gpt.js'; var node = document.getElementsByTagName('script')[0]; node.parentNode.insertBefore(gads, node); })(); </script> <script type='text/javascript'> googletag.cmd.push(function() { googletag.defineSlot('/95963596/ANG_300x250_dfp', [300, 250], 'div-gpt-ad-1450207484070-0').addService(googletag.pubads()); googletag.enableServices(); }); </script> <script type='text/javascript'> googletag.cmd.push(function() { googletag.defineSlot('/95963596/ANG_above_728x90_dfp', [728, 90], 'div-gpt-ad-1450207484070-1').addService(googletag.pubads()); googletag.enableServices(); }); </script> <script type='text/javascript'> googletag.cmd.push(function() { googletag.defineSlot('/95963596/ANG_below_728X90_dfp', [728, 90], 'div-gpt-ad-1450207484070-2').addService(googletag.pubads()); googletag.enableServices(); }); </script> <script type="text/javascript"> (function(isV) { if (!isV) { return; } //this.lycos_search_query = lycos_get_search_referrer(); var adMgr = new AdManager(); var lycos_prod_set = adMgr.chooseProductSet(); var slots = ["leaderboard", "leaderboard2", "toolbar_image", "toolbar_text", "smallbox", "top_promo", "footer2","slider"]; var adCat = this.lycos_ad_category; adMgr.setForcedParam('page', (adCat && adCat.dmoz) ? adCat.dmoz : 'member'); if (this.lycos_search_query) { adMgr.setForcedParam("keyword", this.lycos_search_query); } else if (adCat && adCat.find_what) { adMgr.setForcedParam('keyword', adCat.find_what); } for (var s in slots) { var slot = slots[s]; if (adMgr.isSlotAvailable(slot)) { this.lycos_ad[slot] = adMgr.getSlot(slot); } } adMgr.renderHeader(); adMgr.renderFooter(); }((function() { var w = 0, h = 0, minimumThreshold = 300; if (top == self) { return true; } if (typeof(window.innerWidth) == 'number' ) { w = window.innerWidth; h = window.innerHeight; } else if (document.documentElement && (document.documentElement.clientWidth || document.documentElement.clientHeight)) { w = document.documentElement.clientWidth; h = document.documentElement.clientHeight; } else if (document.body && (document.body.clientWidth || document.body.clientHeight)) { w = document.body.clientWidth; h = document.body.clientHeight; } return ((w > minimumThreshold) && (h > minimumThreshold)); }()))); window.onload = function() { var f = document.getElementById("lycosFooterAd"); var b = document.getElementsByTagName("body")[0]; b.appendChild(f); f.style.display = "block"; document.getElementById('lycosFooterAdiFrame').src = '/adm/ad/footerAd.iframe.html'; // Slider Injection (function() { var e = document.createElement('iframe'); e.style.border = '0'; e.style.margin = 0; e.style.display = 'block'; e.style.cssFloat = 'right'; e.style.height = '254px'; e.style.overflow = 'hidden'; e.style.padding = 0; e.style.width = '300px'; })(); // Bottom Ad Injection ( function() { var b = document.getElementsByTagName("body")[0]; var iif = document.createElement('iframe'); iif.style.border = '0'; iif.style.margin = 0; iif.style.display = 'block'; iif.style.cssFloat = 'right'; iif.style.height = '254px'; iif.style.overflow = 'hidden'; iif.style.padding = 0; iif.style.width = '300px'; iif.src = '/adm/ad/injectAd.iframe.html'; var cdiv = document.createElement('div'); cdiv.style = "width:300px;margin:10px auto;"; cdiv.appendChild( iif ); if( b ) { b.insertBefore(cdiv, b.lastChild); } })(); } </script> <style> #body .adCenterClass { margin:0 auto; display:block !important; overflow:hidden; width:100%; } #body .adCenterClass #ad_container { display:block !important; float:left; width:728px; } @media (min-width: 768px) { <!-- For 300px or less ads ONLY --> #body .adCenterClass #ad_container { width: calc(100% - 372px); } } @media (min-width: 1110px) { <!-- For 728px or less ads --> #body .adCenterClass #ad_container { width: calc(100% - 372px); } } </style> <div style="background:#abe6f6; border-bottom:1px solid #507a87; position:relative; z-index:9999999"> <div class="adCenterClass"> <a href="https://www.angelfire.lycos.com/" title="Angelfire.com: build your free website today!" style="display:block; float:left; width:186px; border:0"> <img src="/adm/ad/angelfire-freeAd.jpg" alt="Site hosted by Angelfire.com: Build your free website today!" style="display:block; border:0" /> </a> <div id="ad_container"> <script type="text/javascript">document.write(lycos_ad['leaderboard']);</script> </div> </div> </div> <!-- ///////////////////////////////////// --> <script type="text/javascript">document.write(lycos_ad['slider']);</script> <div id="lycosFooterAd" style="background:#abe6f6; border-top:1px solid #507a87; clear:both; display:none; position:relative; z-index:9999999"> <div class="adCenterClass" style="display:block!important; overflow:hidden; width:936px;"> <div id="aflinksholder" style="float:left; width:186px;"> <a href="https://www.angelfire.lycos.com/" title="Angelfire.com: build your free website today!" style="display:block; border:0"> <img src="/adm/ad/angelfire-freeAd2.jpg" alt="Site hosted by Angelfire.com: Build your free website today!" style="display:block; border:0" /> </a> </div> <iframe id="lycosFooterAdiFrame" style="border:0; display:block; float:left; height:96px; overflow:hidden; padding:0; width:750px"></iframe> </div> </div> <!--- UNDERDOGMEDIA EDGE_lycos.com JavaScript ADCODE START---> <script data-cfasync="false" language="javascript" async src="//udmserve.net/udm/img.fetch?sid=17754;tid=1;dt=6;"></script> <!--- UNDERDOGMEDIA EDGE_lycos.com JavaScript ADCODE END---> </xmp>
Seldomly-Asked Questions

Q: Why is the sky blue?
A: Because I'm God and I can do whatever the hell I want.

Q: Why is the ground brown?
A: Because the world which now exists rests atop a great pile of crap. Next question.

Q: Why are your programs so small?
A: Because I use Visual Basic, which depends on dynamic link libraries (DLLs). Whenever the program asks the computer for something, the computer refers to the DLLs for instructions on how to make it. Plus, the fact that I usually don't use many graphics helps.

Q: Why are you so smart?
A: I'm not. It's because of your unfathomable stupidity that you perceive me to be so incredibly intelligent.

Q: Huh?
A: You'll understand someday. Now hurry up; your crayons are waiting to be chewed on.

Q: Are you really crazy?
A: Yes.

Q: Really?
A: Yes.

Q: What do I need to do to know as much stuff as you?
A: Die, reincarnate, and hope you become with a higher intelligence quotient.

Q: Why are you so arrogant?
A: I'm not, really. I'm just feigning arrogance because this is where I come to unwind.

Q: If I contact you in some way, will you kill me?
A: It depends.

Q: On what?
A: Does your head grow back?

Q: What do I need to do to start my own webpage?
A: You need to get a good graphics editor, like Adobe Photoshop, learn to use it, then learn HTML.

Q: I wanna write my own programs.
A: That's not a question.

Q: Oh, right. How would I go about making programs?
A: Get the corresponding compiler and learn to program in that language. Some books come with trial versions of the compilers. You might wanna give those a try.

Q: I wanna make a virus. What should I do?
A: Get two different kinds of STDs and hope the viruses in your body mingle and become a new breed of virus.

Q: Are you a mean pers--
A: Shut up.

Q: Do you like corporate sponsorships?
A: No.

This message was brought to you by Deineken.
"It's all about the Deer."™
and by Philip Morris
"Smoking is unhealthy--no, wait. Yeah. Smoking is good. You should smoke."™


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