My two Angels

I never knew about all the support that is around because I was 19 and naive.

It happened on January 6, 2000 exactly 20 weeks into my pregnancy, I was doing my usual routine at 4am, getting up to use the bathroom and going to the frig to eat leftovers when I got the worst pain. I didn't panic because I thought it was gas. Two hours had passed and the pains were about two to three minutes apart, by the time I realized what was going on I tried to relieve myself I sat on the toilet and the unexpected happened ;my water broke.

I arrived at the hospital 20 minutes later to find that my babies would not even have a fighting chance at life . We were told that the best thing for us to do was to have an extended D&C that is a 2nd term abortion procedure . I regret the decision till this very day I wish to have only kissed their little hands or maybe felt them move in my arms but it was too late . I woke up from the so called minor surgery feeling robbed of life and everything good God created .

I was told by doctors I was young and I still had plenty of time and that my life was just beginning. The worse thing for me was going home and seeing reminders of my pregnancy. The grieving process is lonely and unpredictable. I felt terrible for months. I had support, I only wanted understanding and that was very hard to come by .

I felt everything that Talina's mother wrote and I thought that I was the only one who felt this way. I know I never had the chance to hold and kiss my babies , but a loss is a loss and I find that many do not understand unless they have walked a mile in your shoes. I am sorry for your loss and I applaud your strength in sharing your story about your beloved Talina . I will carry her memory with me forever.