Abandonment of Religion
by
Fazeel Aziz Chauhan
10-17-97
When
we come to America, our beliefs are tested and challenged like never
before. In the old country, you are usually conditioned to living in a
homogenous
community. This may have been a predominantly Muslim society or a
native or eastern
culture. Thus the bombardment of all the western and alien elements in
the new and
contrary environment can often send you into a headspin. So much so
that the process
of adaptation or assimilation can make you abandon your religion. The
loss of these
beliefs also translates into the severance of your roots and the
crumbling of your
personality's foundation. This issue is of great concern specially when
it comes to the
new generation. Hopefully sooner than later, you realize that you have
lost your way.
Now how do you get back to the right path?
Life in the
States can be very unstable. The opportunities are available for both
paths: to learn and progress or to slip and drown. Under the new flag,
you may
experience more freedom of choice and decide that nobody can tell you
what to do
anymore. In the past, your father told you to be responsible and held
you accountable
for your actions. Mother told you to be a good boy and stay away from
the company of
partying people. Teachers told you to behave yourself and obey
authority. Your
community pressured you to conform to their religious and cultural
norms.
What leads a person to abandon religion? It probably begins soon after
migration
when a person first tries to assimilate into the American way of life.
You may feel that
all those old pressures and restrictions were bogus and need to go out
the window. You
begin to taste all the forbidden fruits and turn a blind eye toward
your beliefs. You see
that many Americans laugh at the idea of religion and God, and that
concept begins to
brainwash you too. Under the influence of this scientific and
logical-brain oriented
society, you begin to mistrust your heart and soul. Nusrat Fateh Ali
Khan quotes Allama
Iqbal in a Qawali "Man Kee Dunya May Na Daykha May Nay Afrangi Ka Raaj".
Believing the
values of the pop culture, you perceive organized religion as being
empty and meaningless, only full of dogma and rituals. You entertain
the idea that you
haven't seen God and that he doesn't exist. The emphasis on
individualism,
consumerism, and the pleasure principle also encourage you toward
worldly things and
away from spirituality. Crutches like sex, medicines and alcohol only
provide temporary
happiness and escape from harsh realities. Some people subscribe to the
melting pot
philosophy and end up losing their own identity.
The process of moving away from being Muslim and Pakistani, and into
being
American involves losses as well as gains. After the initial mild or
severe culture shock
has diminished, you begin to realize where you are and what you've
lost. "By Gosh
Toto, we're not in Kansas anymore". The solitary life, separation from
family, lack of
belongingness, payment of bills and incompatible values can all become
very stressful.
The loss of a supportive culture can also lead to a loss of the
intertwined religious
beliefs.
As your beliefs weaken, any difficulty can turn into a test of faith
which can cause
you to lose hope and abandon religion. For example, a lack of loving
relationships takes
a heavy emotional toll and makes you lost and lonely. Not understanding
the new
culture's values can cause a lot of suffering and confusion. Often you
feel stranded
between two worlds and even simple decisions can create conflicts that
tear you up
inside. The harsh American life and lack of ikhlaaq (caring) among
people in the big
cities stabs at you to cause ulcers. A major problem develops into a
test of faith, as you
turn to God and pray for help and guidance. And if God doesn't answer
in a timely
manner, you can feel frustrated and overwhelmed. You can get trapped by
grief or
heavy burdens and become hopeless, angry, cynical and rebellious. You
may end up
thinking that maybe there is no God, and religion is not true. Also,
folks who become
rich or happy with stable lives can say "I don't have a problem, Why do
I need
religion?".
Another reason for reaching the point of abandonment of religion is the
lack of a
strong belief system (Imaan). Some of us were not educated with the
proper religious
knowledge and understanding. Instead, blind faith, rote memorization
and fear tactics
were emphasized. Bad experiences with other Muslims who may be unkind,
not
trustworthy, insincere, deceptive, liars, cheats, greedy, selfish,
uncooperative,
self-righteous, prejudiced and narrow minded, make us doubtful and
bitter. We may
start believing the local media who criminalize Muslims and attempt to
defeat, belittle
and deceive us.
How does a person come back to God and religion? After abandonment, a
person may have embarked on a search for truth and spiritual
fulfillment through other
means. Many philosophies can help a person find a good path. But a
proper
understanding of religious teachings can provide guidance on a precise
road map. A
person can come back home to Islam through the front door, by studying
the Quran and
Hadith. The ability to decipher the truth can increase with age. It
would help if practical
solutions to common problems are provided through the mosques. A more
progressive
approach needs to be promoted to better apply Islamic teachings into
every day life. In
this matter, new African American and Hispanic Muslims provide us with
fresh
perspectives, hope and inspiration.
A person can also find his way back home to Islam through outside
channels.
Yoga, self-help books, psychology, meditation, support groups, music,
12 step
programs, counseling, and self expression through the arts can heal a
person. Learning
and testing the truth through these alternative methods can validate
Islamic teachings.
Thus a person can discover that what he was taught in childhood was
true after all and
he can then return to the right path. The best healer and guide is a
sincere and
trustworthy friend. Are you going to help someone by being that Muslim
friend who
serves as an example - like Prophet Mohammed or Hazrat Ali "The Walking
Quran"?
