Alas

I can only picture myself
Purposely wrecking that red car
But this time I`m not by myself
So I`ll wait until they are far

So now I`m taking a shower upstairs
With as many tears as drops of water
And my happiness seems so scarce
So I pray for some help from my Father

I keep asking God for help
I keep saying I`m sorry
I just keep asking for help
I guess that`s my life story

I just fall down to the floor
And I curl up in a ball
I`ve been in this place before
But there`s no one I can call

So I`m crying up in my room now
All curled in a ball on my bed
But I just can`t seem to stop now
And I keep wishing I were dead

I thought I was finally past all this
But I just pushed it down and now it`s back
And I can`t remember true happiness
And now I just know that I`m gonna crack

I just can`t take anymore
Can`t seem to do nothin` right
They`ll find me dead on the floor
If I never find the light

I ask for some forgiveness
One more chance at innocence
I ask for more forgiveness
But all I get is silence

I`ve tried to tell you my story
But you would never believe it
And now you`ll really be sorry
Cuz soon you're gonna witness it

Now I`ve finally mad a decision
I`ll just have to take control of my life
So Alas the winner is depression
Once and for all I`m gonna end my strife

Don`t know when and don`t know how
But I can`t take anymore
Cuz it will happen somehow
They`ll find me dead on the floor