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Annette’s grandmother passed away in the night. She had been moved into hospice
care days before. Her granddaughter had been uneasy since then. Katsuya stayed
by her side.
“I’m here for you,” he said. She fought back her tears. Annette’s been trying to
keep it together for so long. It seems like she has to be the responsible mom in
the group. Lately, she seems tired of that role. She drew back her hand.
“What’s wrong?” Katsuya asked.
“Please,” Annette said. “Just leave me alone.” Her boyfriend looked confused.
“Are you sure?” he asked. She got up and walked down the hall. Katsuya reached
out to her.
“Annette?” he asked. She was already gone down the hall. Her boyfriend didn’t go
home that night. He didn’t seem to know what to do as he lowered his arm.
Annette got the call the next morning. She mumbled to herself as she reached
around for her phone.
“Hello?” Annette asked. The call didn’t have to last long. The girl sat up
straight.
“What?” she asked. The rest of the message went in and out. Annette stared off
into space. Just like that, her world was turned upside down.
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Around ten, Katsuya walked up to Annette’s front door and knocked.
“Hello?” he asked. “Anybody home?” She was the one who called him over. His
girlfriend sounded so dead over the phone.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
“Could you please come over?” she asked. He could hear her trying to keep it
together again but failing this time. Katsuya lifted his chin.
“I will be right over,” he said.
He looked up when the door opened. Annette stood in the doorway.
“Oh, you’re here,” she said. She looked like she could go back to bed. The bags
under her eyes looked to heavy. Speaking of her eyes, they looked so empty. It
didn’t help that her hair was a mess and she looked so pale. Katsuya rushed
forward and hugged her.
“I’m so sorry,” he whispered. She collapsed in his arms and breathed out.
Annette didn’t have the energy to cry. He turned her face towards him.
“Have you eaten yet?” Katsuya asked. Annette shook her head.
“Okay,” he said. The boy helped his girlfriend into the house. It would be
better if he made her something light in case she wasn’t hungry. She still
needed to eat.
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The funeral preparations had to be made. For the first day, Annette just felt
numb. At least the old lady didn’t suffer. That’s what they told her. Whether
she believed that or not, remained to be seen. She sat quiet as some of her
grandmother’s friends went over what they were going to do next. Annette just
sat and nodded. One of the old ladies touched her on the hand. The girl turned
her head.
“Are you okay?” the old lady asked. Annette didn’t say anything. She wished they
would stop asking her that. The girl just didn’t want to feel anything. Annette
rose to her feet.
“I’m just tired,” she said. The girl got up and walked down the hall. The old
ladies looked at each other before they whispered.
“Poor girl,” they were saying. “She’s not taking this well.” Annette kept her
head down as she made it back to her room. Once inside, she walked over to her
bed like a zombie and collapsed face down. She wouldn’t wake up until eight the
next morning.
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Annette couldn’t tell anyone what she was really feeling. Some people would
shame her if she really said them out loud. Only Yuki was the one to get the
truth.
“How are you feeling really?” he asked on her bed. Annette turned to him.
“Honestly,” she said. “Sad and happy.” Yuki tilted his head.
“What does that mean?” he asked. Annette looked up at him with hollow eyes.
“I’m sad because it’s my grandma,” she said in a shaky voice. “But at the same
time she doesn’t have to suffer anymore.” Yuki narrowed his eyes.
“And?” he asked. Annette froze as if she was woken up out her daze. Her dear
friend kept her gaze on her. She lowered her eyes.
“I’m free,” she said in a whisper. She lifted her yes and looked at Yuki. He
didn’t have any emotion on his face. Already, she felt bad for voicing her true
thoughts.
“What are you going to do now?” he asked.
“I don’t know,” she said. Annette shook her head. Yuki pulled her into his arms
for a hug. He didn’t need to say anything. It wasn’t like he could think of
anything to say anyway. Meanwhile, she just went limp in his arms as her mind
went blank. She didn’t want to have to think about anything else.