THE AFFAIR

I laugh while the rain falls on my hair,
and mats it to my head
a scalpel slices open my skin
and exposes my heart

can you see it beating?
bump, bump, bump,
As if it has some tortured reason to exist
while I have been maligned*
and left alone with my affair**
that leaves me feeling black
in the pit of my stomach.

And this Christmas,
I will spend the day alone.

Copyright Š2006 Ashi Shadow 12/24/06
Maligned by the affair, who apparently "liked" me, but not enough.
"left alone with" meaning having nothing else.
The affair leaves me feeling black in the pit of my stomach,
because it leaves me feeling empty. That even she doesn't like that much. Thus, I have nothing.