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Tim:Hello and welcome to an episode of Fatal Friday Fights. Incase you didn’t notice there are now two shows going: traditional Fatal Friday Fights and the newest show, Kaiju Warfare. Basically just expect some random matches from G13 and BLADE. Our crew are working hard adjusting my island with new traps while fans are flooding into the stands to view first hand the second Fatal Friday Fights Special Event. So we take you now to the Snow Globe were AJ has drawn up some plans himself for tonight. AJ will be opening tonight’s show with the Giant Gila Monster versus the Shrewster!

Tim broad casting via satellite: Hey AJ! Time for that lizard to fight the big rodent?!

AJ: Well not really. Those two can’t fight. They’ve gone missing. Chief scientists of Monster Island say they were attacked by the “GTS Mechs“. I don’t like this. Sure when they first appeared they weren’t much of a threat but now they’re really annoying.

Tim: So what now?

AJ: Back up plan, Jet Jaguar versus Hero Zero.

Tim: Seriously?

AJ: They’re the only two I could get in such short time.

Tim: Whatever.

Clash of Size Altering Super Guys

       VS      
Jet Jaguar                                 Hero Zero

AJ: The arena becomes the frozen wasteland known as Antarctica. Both humanoid combatants enter the arena and the fight begins.

Jet Jaguar begins to search the maze of glaciers and icy mountains for his foe. What he doesn’t realize is that there’s a twenty foot Hero Zero right in front of him. Hero Zero grows to match JJ’s height, plowing a fist into Jet Jaguar’s chin as he grows. Jet Jaguar is knocked to his back. The hero rolls away from his foe before rising to his feet, ready to face off with the opposing multi-colored robot. The two charge. Hero Zero throws a fist but doesn’t hit his opponent’s face. Jet Jaguar had shrunk to thirty meters in order to evade the attack and now the miniaturized robot is pummeling HZ’s gut. A good kick from Hero Zero sends Jet Jaguar sliding across the arctic terrain on his back. Hero Zero chases after Jet Jaguar until the funky robot disappears, reducing his mass to a small seven foot in order to hide from Hero Zero. HZ isn’t fooled and soon we have a fight between two human-sized kaiju. Hero Zero comes at JJ flying. At the last minute JJ flies above Hero Zero and the robot bangs his head into a block of ice. He gets up and turns around just to be met by Jet Jaguars fist. Hero Zero took a blow to the face and went back to the ground. Jet Jaguar proceeds in stomping on his downed foe but is sent for a loop when Hero Zero grows back to fifty meters. A still human sized Jet Jaguar soon realizes there’s a tremendous foot looming over him. Jet Jaguar grows to daikaiju height just in time to catch HZ’s foot and throw him to the ground. Hero Zero gets off the ground almost as quick as he hit it before both combatants are sent to the ground when JJ drop kicks HZ in the chest. When they next get up it’s HZ who’s on the attack, flinging a fury of punches in JJ’s face and chest. A heavy kick to the side sends JJ crashing down. HZ seems ready to end the match, rolling JJ to his back, beating him in the face with three punches before he pins. Jet Jaguar has other plans, rolling backwards, flinging Hero Zero through a glacier. The super human leaps free of the ruble before surging forward, and sending JJ through a glacier with a powerful kick. Hero Zero goes for a pin, but is met with resistance as the grounded Jet Jaguar hurls large chunks of ice. Hero Zero cuts through the projectiles with an impressive jump towards his enemy. Jet Jaguar rolls out of the way so he’s next to HZ when he lands. The robot then repositions itself and takes the opportunity to bicycle kick HZ in the back. After pummeling the super hero with his feet JJ delivers a full strength kick, sending the hero to the ground. HZ is quickly back on his feet before he takes off into the air. Jet Jaguar wastes no time and immediately flies to meet Hero Zero in aerial combat. JJ and HZ meet at 30,000 feet. Jet Jaguar darts through the air at high speed, shoulder slamming Hero Zero at Mach 5. Hero Zero is sent spiraling backwards from the blow but somehow regains control. Hero Zero then flies at Jet Jaguar. Before JJ has time to plan a course of defense Hero Zero punches Jet Jaguar a number of times before kicking the kung-fu mecha to the ground. Jet Jaguar frantically scrambles to his feet before Hero Zero swoops down and roundhouse kicks him to the face. The attack sends JJ sliding across the terrain. Jet Jaguar quickly staggers to his feet. Hero Zero soars towards JJ but this time JJ manages to catch his fist and follows this up by swinging the super teenager in circles and hurling him into a glacier. He’s not on the ground long before JJ grabs him by the wrist and swings him through the air and crashing into the ground. JJ goes for a mad pummel on HZ but the hero sends him staggering back with a kick to the gut. By the time JJ regains his balance Hero Zero had already gotten back up to plow a fist into JJ’s gut. JJ backs away from his opponent before something strange happens, JJ’s hands begin to glow. Jet Jaguar claps his hands together and hits HZ with a blast of sound (incase you don’t know it’s his projectile weapon from Godzilla: Save the Earth). Hero Zero is rocked back from the attack. Before he can recover JJ lunges forward and viper jabs him at the base of the neck. An unconscious Hero Zero falling to the ground marks Jet Jaguar’s victory.

Tim: […Zzzz…Zzzz….] Huh? Oh…Yeah AJ that was something. Next the traitorous King of Mons accepts his punishment in a cage match with both Gojira and Bagan against him.

       VS      
King of Mons                                           Gojira & Bagan

AJ: For this match the arena becomes a featureless rock floor with a giant cage in the middle.

A nervous looking King of Mons is teleported right next to the cage before he is escorted inside by King Kong and Gamera. Once this process is repeated with Gojira and Bagan, Kong and Gamera lock the cage door. The bell rings and the fight begins.

King of Mons opens up the match by blasting his foes with an energy beam on sight. As the smoke clears Gojira and Bagan find themselves staring at three sets of glowing red eyes.

With wings extended KOM leaps high into the air. Gojira’s spinal plates glow, surging with radioactivity as he charges his nuclear beam. Moments later, a burning stream of blue energy rips free of his maw but the stream breaks as it impacts KOM’s force shield before King of Mons collides into Gojira with huge force. Before Bagan can come to Gojira’s aid the KOM Amphibian and KOM Mantis come down on him, pushing him with their combined weight. Bagan breaks free of the two lesser kaiju, rushing forward in a burst of speed. Bagan then turns to face his opponents. KOM Mantis bombards the super beast with a trio of energy balls. The KOM Amphibian makes a bold move and charges Bagan directly. The lesser kaiju head butts Bagan but only succeeds in knocking himself unconscious against Bagan’s impenetrable armor. The KOM Mantis lunges at Bagan to assist his hapless ally. The insecticide monster swings its scythe-like arms but fails to do any damage to the super monster. The monster swings its blade again, this time Bagan catches the appendage and throws the kaiju to the ground.

King of Mons begins a violent beat down on Gojira until he, himself is thrown to the ground from a nuclear pulse. Both reptilian kaiju are back to their feet and ready to face off. King of Mons swings his tail to collide with Gojira’s chest. After putting some distance between each other KOM blasts him with his heat ray. Gojira is rocked back from the blast but he shakes it off and lunges towards King of Mons. He swings a fist but at the last moment King of Mons summons his force shield. Gojira plows his fist into a wall of energy before he is thrown back in a cloud of steam. An angered Gojira brings an end to King of Mons gloating with a nuclear beam to the chest that sends him to his back.

By this time both KOM Mantis and KOM Amphibian are back in the game. The KOM Amphibian rears up on its hind leg, swinging at Bagan with its short forelimbs. Bagan rewards the creature for its effort by bending over, charging forward and impaling it through the gut on to his nose horn. The fish-like monster struggles free and quickly backs away from Bagan, losing tremendous amounts of blood from its mouth. KOM Mantis again tries to assist its brethren by charging at Bagan while firing red energy balls along the way. As he finally nears Bagan the great insect swings a heavy scythe-like claw. Bagan, again, catches the mantis by its weapon but this time the ancient kaiju violently tears the limb off at the shoulder. Bagan follows through by punching KOM Mantis across the face, leaving the creature down on its side. Bagan then dips its own severed claw into its hip before he puts the creature out of its misery with a plasma beam. KOM Mantis goes up in smoke. In either desperation or fury the KOM Amphibian tackles Bagan and for the first time tonight the super monster ends up on the ground. Bagan shoves the opposing monster off of himself. As the monster flees Bagan grabs a hold of its tail and swings it through the air before it meets the side of the cage with great speed and force. Bagan dropped the dazed kaiju. Before it has a chance to run away Bagan grabs it by the top jaw and forces its big mouth open before firing gravity rays down its throat, destroying KOM Amphibian in the same manner as KOM Mantis.

From the death of his spawn King of Mons’ wings and stomach spikes burst into nothing. Now a weakened King of Mons must face two super monsters alone. Desperate to kill Gojira before Bagan arrives by his side King of Mons charges the king of monsters, using his claws and the horn upon his head to dig into Gojira’s flesh. A shove sends him stumbling away before he charges right back in, biting into Gojira’s shoulder. Godzilla charges up a nuclear beam but before he can discharge Bagan grabs King of Mons by the tail and tosses him aside. He then decides to push Godzilla to the ground, his nuclear beam tearing a whole in the cage roof.

Bagan: I don’t need you for this match so I’ll destroy you!

Tim: What a turn this has taken. Looks like old rivalries never die. Bagan tries to hit Gojira with a plasma beam but the monster king rolls out of the way before using his tail to deliver a blow to Bagan’s chin. Bagan staggers back and by the time he regains his balance a nuclear beam nails him in the face. Bagan roars in hatred as he launches a trio of energy stars at Gojira. The old bloke from ’54 takes the hit but remains in his position. The king of monsters releases a nuclear pulse which throws Bagan to the ground.

Gojira: Just what do you hope to accomplish?

Bagan: I’m going to kill you! Then I’m going to smear that other loser across the cage bars!

Gojira: Well don’t look now: but that “other loser” is digging his way out.

[Bagan looks over his shoulder and spies King of Mons sitting in a thirty-meter-deep hole, scooping up large amounts of dirt in his claws and tossing them over his shoulder.]

AJ: Bagan doesn’t look too pleased about King of Mons trying to escape. With his high speed he is soon upon KOM. Bagan grabs King of Mons by his stubs of wings and yanks him out of the hole he’s in. He then slams his assigned foe to the dirt.

King of Mons: Why? Why not accept my offer for power when I had handed it to you?

Bagan: Shut up and fight!

[Bagan picks up King of Mons, pins him against the cage wall and punches him across the face.]

King of Mons: I see. You can’t resist the influence humans have over you.

Bagan: Shut up!

[Bagan drops King of Mons to the ground and begins mercilessly stomping on his gut.]

King of Mons: You are a disgrace to kaiju.

Bagan: Shut up!!!

[In one powerful kick to the face, blood flies and an unconscious King of Mons lies in a crimson puddle, twitching.]

Tim:Wow. I didn’t think Bagan could be that harsh. King of Mons will be sent to the med bay. He really needs hit. The horn on his head is broken in two, he’s missing countless teeth, has several broken ribs and a concussion on top of all of it. Those Planet X people can fix him up like new but I bet that hurt all the same. Thank you for the transmission AJ. It looks as though they finished up making repairs since the King of Baltan’s nice little visit and we’re ready for the main event! A ten monster battle royale!

Weaponizer, Armor Mothra, Baragon, Dragma, Behemoth, Zedus, Crackler, Megaguirus, Megalon, Jiras

[AJ teleports inside the flying saucer with Tim.]

Tim: Fans cheer as the first monster enters the arena. The Weaponizer unit is dropped off on the shore. Shortly after arrival the cyborg tears up the landscape in front of it with its machine gun, setting off a land mine in the process. As a cloud of smoke rises Weaponizer cries out for a challenger. His call is answered from Dragma who circles over the cyborg like a buzzard. Suddenly something silver shoots past Dragma, throwing him off guard. It’s Armor Mothra! Zedus finishes his climb to the summit of Mt. Grand and roars, issuing a challenge to all below it. Mean while, on the other side of the island there’s an explosion as Megalon surfaces from the underground. Jiras is teleported to another part of the beach. Upon arrival an oval of mines explode all around him just for the effect. Jiras spies a remote controlled tank coming his way and dispatches the unit with his heat ray before it had a chance to fire a round. Baragon and Behemoth are the next to enter the arena before both are blown to the ground as Megaguiras swoops past them. That’s nine.

[Just then a second UFO appears over the island, this one towing some sort of energy cannon. It fires a blue discharge directed at the ground. The area is engulfed by a blinding light. When it fades we find that the energy has materialized into a humanoid form, the Crackler!]

AJ: That’s all ten. Let’s get started!

Tim: Megalon and Weaponizer face off as Armor Mothra and Dragma clash in the skies. Megalon fires his horn laser which impacts in front of Weaponizer. The cyborg charges out of the smoke at Megalon. Weaponizer swings a clawed hand at Megalon. Megalon ducks down beneath the attack and bashes the broad side of his drill hand into the Weaponizer’s gut.

The Crackler knocks the wind out of Baragon with an electrified fist. The dinosaur quickly recovers from the attack and uses his heat ray, but the energy only makes the Crackler grow. Crackler launches an electrical assault upon Baragon, knocking him off his feet. Baragon quickly formulates a plan and disappears underground. Crackler tries to chase after it when the ground beneath him gives way and it falls into the trap Baragon had dug. Baragon then sets work burying the non-living kaiju.

When the Behemoth sends out some nuclear shockwaves at Zedus, Megaguiras realizes he’s a source of power and targets the “paleosaurus”. Behemoth redirects his attacks towards Megaguiras but the dragon fly is too fast to hit. Megaguiras uses a sonic boom to throw the dino to the ground before spearing him in the side with her stinger. She then begins to draw in Behemoth’s nuclear energy. It’s not long before the only American\European monster is out of the match.

AJ: Why are non-Asian kaiju always wimps?

Tim: Jiras and Zedus go head to head! The two frilled kaiju charge one another, meeting each other in a thunderous boom. Jiras begins bashing his fists into Zedus’s side as the carnivorous sea monster uses his claws to scratch at his foe’s chest. Jiras tears away from Zedus, roaring in agony, hand over wound. Zedus shows no empathy for his ken and spears Jiras in the shoulder with his barbed tongue. When Zedus tries to stick him with his tongue again, Jiras dodges it before he grabs a hold and tears it out of his mouth in a spray of purple blood. In rage Zedus charges Jiras, head butting him in the chest and sending him staggering backwards. Upon regaining his balance Jiras fires his electric beam at Zedus, scoring a hit upon his chest. Zedus is sent backwards in a cloud of smoke, his chest badly burned. Zedus, being the kick boxer he is, comes back at Jiras and rams a foot into his gut. Jiras goes down and Zedus begins to kick boulders onto the downed Gojira-look-alike. Suddenly a plasma ball from Megaguiras impacts into Zedus’s side, sending him to the ground badly injured. Rather than be killed or keep on fighting the dinosaur taps out.

AJ: But why would Megaguiras assist Jiras.

Tim: Because, having witnessed his beam attack, Megaguiras now knows he can use Jiras to feed off of. Now two dino-kaiju are out of the game, leaving only eight. Jiras gets back to his feet, only to have Megaguiras grab him by the shoulders, toss him to the ground and start taking in energy from him through her stinger.

Crackler is finally out of the hole, Megalon has fled from the Weaponizer underground and Armor Mothra can’t seem to hurt Dragma despite the fact that they’ve been battling for quite a while now and Baragon is no where to be seen. Megalon surfaces from behind Weaponizer and throws to the ground with a blast from a napalm grenade. Weaponizer is back up in an instant to unleash a rain f bullets on Megalon with its machine gun. Megalon tries to use his drill hands has a shield but he can’t protect his entire body. When the assault ends Megalon is so fatigued he can hardly move. Weaponizer makes a quick advance towards him and punches the over-sized bug between the eyes, sending the insect to his back.

Baragon suddenly bursts out of the side of Mt. Grand as Crackler draws too close. The subterranean monster tackles Crackler to the ground and goes in for the pin. Before the countdown starts the Crackler’s body releases a tidal wave of electricity that sends the poor kaiju flying into Megaguiras who had been towing Jiras across the arena. Jiras, now free of Megaguiras’s grip, is on his feet. Crackler followed after Baragon and Megaguiras is back in the air. Jiras fires his electric beam at Megaguiras who easily dodges the assault. Crackler takes a swing at Jiras and punches him in the back of the head. Baragon takes advantage of this and goes in to pin the frilled kaiju as Megaguiras draws The Crackler’s attention. Crackler sends an electric bolt at Megaguiras, bringing the bug to the ground. That’s when Megaguiras got a dumb idea. Jiras kicks out, throwing Baragon off. The two dinosaur monster then charge at one another. Jiras bites into Baragon’s shoulder as Baragon claws at Jiras with his fore-claws. Jiras decides to fire his electric beam while still biting Baragon. Baragon cries out in pain and struggles to get away, goring Jiras with his nasal horn. Jiras gathers his strength to literally pick up and throw Baragon into the side of Mt. Grand. Jirasu then fires his electric beam to bring upon a rock slide. Soon afterwards Jiras collapses, passed out from blood loss. However, despite his efforts Baragon is still able to fight, leaving seven kaiju remaining.

Megaguiras’s incredibly dumb idea is too drain Crackler of his energy. Being that Crackler is nothing but energy she is actually weakening him, but I don’t think she can handle so much energy.

AJ: Baragon works his way to the surface with his nasal horn but dives back down underground when he sees what Megaguiras is up to. Armor Mothra has given up trying to use her heat ray on Dragma and instead now tries to use her “Transcend Fate” finishing move to crystallize the winged demon. Dragma, knowing that something strange is going on tries to flee from Armor Mothra. He eventually tries to lose her by diving down into the death pit. Another stupid idea. Mothra uses her heat ray to fill in the Death Pit before using the same magic seal she used on Des Ghidorah at the end of “Rebirth of Mothra” to keep Dragma trapped there. Dragma can no longer fight, leaving six kaiju still in. The Crackler uses an electric bolt to get away from Megaguiras, but by this time he’s been reduced to thirty meters. He tries to run away but Megaguiras’s stinger soon finds its place in the Crackler’s back and the dragon fly continues to absorb the theta wave monster.

Tim: Megalon and Weaponizer are still going at it. Megalon comes at Weaponizer with a drill dive from the sky. Weaponizer jumps back at the last minute and Megalon dives straight down into the ground. Megalon comes up from behind Weaponizer, just as the dinosaur cyborg expected. But what didn’t expect was that just as soon it turned around it was his head-on by a horn laser. While the Weaponizer was off balance Megalon drop kicked it in the chest, shattering its machine gun. The two begin to grapple with each other when Mothra swoops down and crystallizes both if them in one hit. Moments later both cyborgs explode in a shower of crystal shards.

Megaguiras absorbs all of Crackler before she explodes herself leaving only Baragon and Armor Mothra. Baragon surfaces to find Mothra coming for him. He tries to use his heat ray but it does nothing to Mothra’s super form. Mothra comes in low to dice Baragon up with her bladed wings. As she gets close Baragon leaps on top of her before bounding off, sending Mothra skidding across landscape and on to an electric prod. (A new trap.) Mothra shakes off the attack and takes back to the air as Baragon burrows underground. Mothra circles the island searching for Baragon, waiting for him to surface.

Tim: Readings show that one of the raps have been dismantled. Suddenly Baragon bursts out from under ground, carrying a stash of missiles from a trap that had been planted under ground. He then tosses one of the projectiles like a yard dart, blowing Mothra out of the sky. He then drops the rest of the stash on her in the same way.

Armor Mothra: Clever. But not enough to beat me!

Tim: Before Baragon can pull anything else Mothra sends him to his back with an Armor Heat Ray and prepares to use “Transcend Fate” again. By the time Baragon got back up it was too late. He was disposed of like the others Armor Mothra had fought.

AJ: Well that’s our show. I have no idea what we’re going to do next week but… What? Cryptocleidus and the Giant Snapping Turtle from Godzilla the Series have shown up.

Cryptocleidus: I’ll tell you what your going to do! You’re going to give us a match up! I’m Cryptocleidus and this is the Giant Turtle: together we are “Team Aqua-Terror!”

Tim: Cryptocleidus? I thought you were dead after the Tachyon invasion. No remains were ever found.

Cryptocleidus: I’m alive and I’m hungry! Set up your best fighters! I’ll try to go easy on them.

[Chameleon appears in the arena.]

Chameleon: Who and what are you geeks.

Tim: Well, Cryptocleidus is an under water dinosaur…

[Before Tim could finish King Kong appears in the arena.]

Kong: So you’re telling me this new guy is a dinosaur.

Tim: Technically speaking he’s a marine reptile. You see “dinosaur” by definition….

Kong: Whatever! He’s close enough to a dinosaur for me to know he’s useless in battle!

[Gwangi appears in the arena.]

Gwangi: What do you mean! Dinosaurs are skilled fighters!

Kong: Oh really? Prove it! I’ll get some of the other members of “Ape” and we’ll have a three on three match to decide which is better: apes or dinosaurs.

[T-Rex enters the ring.]

T-Rex: Gwangi, I’m with ya’ pal. Let’s kick some “Ape” butt next week!

Chameleon: Um… As I was saying. If “Team Aqua-Terror” wants to mess with the best they can mess with me and Komodithrax next week!

Giant Turtle: It’s on!

T-Rex: Wait a second, Gwangi… He said 3 on 3, who’s our third?

Gwangi: Don’t worry. There are so many dinosaurs in the WMW it should be easy to find someone.

-Later that day-

[Gwangi and T-Rex stop by Gojira’s cave on Monster Island.]

T-Rex: What do you mean you won’t help us.

Gojira: Look, Tim said he wouldn’t give me very many matches over the summer. No way am I volunteering for this.

Gwangi: What else do you have to do ya’ lazy lizard!?!

[Moments later T-Rex and Gwangi scramble out of Gojira’s cave, narrowly avoiding nuclear beams on their way out.]

T-Rex: Nice one, Gwangi!

Gwangi: Maybe “lazy lizard” was a little harsh.

[Later that day Gwangi and T-Rex arrive at Gorgo’s cave.]

Gorgo: Nope. Not doing it.

Gwangi: Oh! Come on! You haven’t done anything in so long! I know! You’re still moping about losing your belt title to La Canyana aren’t you!?

[Seconds afterwards T-Rex and Gwangi run as fast as they can away from Gorgo’s cave, Gorgo hot on their heels.]

T-Rex: Smooth move, Gwangi!

Gorgo: Never mention The Giant Claw around me!!!

[After losing Gorgo the two stop to rest when a bipedal reptile with crocodile-like jaws and a sail on its back jumps out at them.]

JP3 Spinosaur: Hey T-Rex, give me your lunch money!

T-Rex: AHH!

Spinosaurus: No seriously, I’m a little broke. You wouldn’t mind chipping in for a pal would you?

T-Rex: “Pal?” You broke my neck! Literally broke it!

Spinosaurus: I was hungry. Hey you look down.

T-Rex: Hey! You’re a dinosaur! Kong said that apes were better than dinosaurs.

Spinosaurus: What!?!

T-Rex: Will you help me fight in a three on three match against a bunch of dirty stinkin’ apes.

Spinosaurus: Doesn’t sound too hard… Sure I’ll do it!

T-Rex: Yes! We have a team. We’re going to dominate next week! That is if you humans vote for us. Tune in next week to witness our triumph. Until then bye-bye!