Title:  Right Before Your Eyes

Author: Wereleopard
Rating: PG
Email: ivanova58@yahoo.co.uk
Genre: Angst
Summary: Up to pregnant Darla it is AU, Angel’s thoughts and questions about himself, his friends, his redemption and the love he has for Cordy.

Disclaimer: The characters in the Angel verse were created by Joss Whedon & David Greenwalt. No infringement is intended, no profit is made I am just poor and the song doesn’t belong to me either.
Distribution: FSB!

Feedback: Yes please!

A/N  Sorry this isn’t that good but it was stuck in my head and wouldn’t leave I am planning this to just being a one off since it isn’t that good.

Angel sat watching his friends, watching Cordelia; he was so thankful that they had forgiven him.  It taken a lot longer with her because they were closer, but it was worth all the effort on his part and he hoped she thought so to.  But what did she truly see when she looked at him,

When the door shuts, don’t worry about me
It’s not attention that I want from you
I need you to trust who I’m gonna be
And in everything I’m going to do
Cause I’m not afraid of what I don’t know
For understanding is all that I earn
But what is for sure is I’m going to go
I’m going to live and I’m going to learn

Did she believe that he was really sorry that he had hurt them, hurt her?  Did she trust in his redemption as much as she did when they first found out?  Did she think that he would be a good human? 

Then other questions began to run through his mind.  Would he continue the good fight with them or would he give it up for normality?  Would he be able to accept them when he was like them and vice versa?  Would he keep learning and changing or would he be selfish and think of all the things he hadn’t done in centuries and concentrate on only his happiness, his pleasure?

He hoped that he would continue to fight side by side and that they would be able to experience all things with him, watching him having fun in the sun together.  He hoped that they would be closer than before. 

And I know there will be mistakes that I will make
But I know none are worse than chances I don’t take

Angel glanced at his friends one more time before he leant back and closed his eyes.  He had made so many mistakes small ones and big ones.  Some of them he would do again even though it was wrong.  If he believed that it would save the people who meant everything to him then he would do it again and again.   Like seeing the lawyers in a room with Darla and Drusilla and just turning his back on them.  Angel had thought maybe it would have made their lives a little easier, but it didn’t but he had to risk it.

Darla, Angel took a deep breath one he didn’t need.  He lied to Cordy about not sleeping with her but he couldn’t tell her not when they had just go their friendship on track but it was worse now because Fred had pointed out something to him, he couldn’t believe that he hadn’t noticed it before he, the vampire with a soul had fallen head of heels in love with Cordelia Chase, cheerleader, ex-may queen and ex-bitch of Sunnydale High.  In a way the thought of him being in love with her was even more of a cosmic joke than when he was in love with Buffy at least they had the same calling, killing vampires.  But him and Cordy were completely different but they complemented each other.  He could talk to her and her to him, the love that he felt for Buffy was nothing compared to what he felt for his seer.  She is the centre of his world.

Right before your eyes, I am changing
Changing
You laugh on the inside, I am changing
Changing

Could she ever love a vampire?  Can’t she see that I have changed from Sunnydale?  That I have changed ever since Angel Investigations?  Angel knew that she loved him as a friend but he hoped and wished that it could be more but how would he ever find out when every time he talked to her he became a stuttering idiot and the demon screams at him just to take her and own her, but the soul just wants to love her.

He didn’t want her to give up some resemblance to normalcy but he didn’t think that he would be able to see her with anyone else.  That would be the time he would have to move on, or try to.  It was hard when he left Buffy for her own good but he couldn’t do that for Cordelia otherwise he would have done it a while ago and she wouldn’t have let him go, she would have looked for him.

How he prayed for the day he became human to be now.

When the door shuts, it shuts finally
A new person that I have become
I’ll follow my heart to my destiny
Living in fear and the sorrow is done

There will be no more feeling that I’m all alone
I will surround myself with things that help me grow

Angel smiled at the images that flashed through his mind him sitting having a picnic with Cordelia feeding each other, walking hand in hand alone the beach and then watching the sunset, rubbing suntan lotion over her body, making love, getting married and having their family around them, having children and growing old together.  They ran through his mind so quickly he couldn’t reach out and grasp them they just slipped through his fingers.  But that was what he truly wanted for his redemption just to be with the woman he loved whatever that entailed.

He opened his eyes and saw Hazel ones staring back him, concern on her face.  Angel smiled just to let her know that everything was fine.  Maybe it was time to tell her.

“Cordy.”  He said a nervous hitch in his voice.

“What is it Angel? Are you ok?”  Cordy asked watching him intently.

“I’m fine I just have to tell you something.”  Angel breathed deeply again.

“You can tell me anything you know that right?”  Her face more worried now.

“I know that, I’ve been meaning to say this for a while Cordy I lo…”

“Look it’s daddy.”  Said a very familiar voice.

Angel froze but forced himself to turn.

Standing there in a red dress was a very pregnant Darla.  He didn’t want to look back at Cordy but he had to explain somehow. 

It destroyed him the look of hurt and disappointment on her face.

“You slept with her.  You promised me Angel, YOU LIED TO ME.”

Cordy turned and walked out of the door of the hotel.

“Cordy wait.”  He called to her and his heart cried to hers.

“I can’t do this not anymore Angel.  I thought you changed but you just kept lying, I’ll call you if I have a vision don’t try to find me.”

With that she vanished and it was a few minutes later that it clicked what she had said don’t try to find me.  Cordy, his Cordy had left him.

He turned and saw the same looks on their faces and ran straight past Darla to outside but she was no where to be seen.

“CORDY.”  He screamed and collapsed to his knees.

Gunn and Wes helped him up and brought him back into the lobby.

“She left me.”  He sobbed.

A sigh came from the blonde Fred glared at her.  “Well enough of this little soap opera.”  Darla paused.  “WHAT THEY HELL DID YOU DO TO ME?”  She shouted.

“Wes can you?”  Angel waved vaguely towards Darla; the vampire narrowed her eyes at him.

Angel turned and headed upstairs and went to his room he curled up on the bed, he was numb.

“She left me.”  Angel whispered softly.

Right before your eyes I am changing
Changing
You laugh on the inside, I am changing
Changing

Right before your eyes I am changing
Changing
You laugh on the inside, I am changing
Changing

Right before your eyes I am changing
Changing
You laugh on the inside, I am changing
Changing

Right before your eyes
Right before your eyes

Chapter 2

Angel stayed in his room for the next week.  The rest of the AI gang had been dealing with Darla.  Cordy had finally gone back to her apartment and they managed to get hold of her but she could deal seeing Angel at the moment after everything they had been through he could still look her in the eye and lie to her. 

Wes was worried so he called Buffy and she dropped everything and headed to LA.   They were all worried about their friend they had never seen him like this it seemed as if he had just given up.  Wes was just hoping with his and Buffy’s history that she could talk some sense into him and she was happy to try with her dying Wes thought that she jumped at the chance get away and forget about her problems just for a little while.

*****

Angel felt so alone he missed her companionship, her smile, her laugh he missed everything about her.  He wanted to open his eyes and see her there, see her smile that open, warm and loving one she had.  The vampire knew that he truly had messed up not only did he turn his back on her, which she did eventually manage to forgive him for but even after that time and time again he lied to her, looked her in the eyes and continued to lie.

“Angel?”  A familiar feminine voice said, it wasn’t the voice he wanted to hear but he was glad to see her.

“Buffy, what are you doing here?”  He asked as he opened up his eyes and gazed at his ex-girlfriend.

“Wesley was worried about you and he phoned me.  You really messed up huh?”  She said with a small smile.  Her heart ached for the man in front of her, she had never seen him this lost before, he looked as lost as she felt.

The slayer walked over and laid on the bed next to him rubbing his arm softly.

“I don’t think she’ll ever forgive me and that is saying a lot she has forgiven me for a lot of things I have done but this I’ve lost her.”  With that Angel started to cry for his body felt cold even to him and he truly did feel dead.  He didn’t want to feel like that not anymore he just wanted to be warm and to be help.

Buffy watched him she knew that he was feeling exactly how she did, and they just needed to be with someone, to be with each other just for one moment, one hour, one day.  Her heart leapt at the thought and she tried to banish the thought that they could be together again.  She had been so excited when Wesley had told her that after the Darla incident the PTB didn’t want to risk Angelus coming out that they made his soul permanent.

Angel stood still as Buffy’s head moved towards his and everything seemed to happen in slow motion and their lips touch softly.  He knew that there wouldn’t be anything between them but he just needed this right now and he could see that she wanted it too.

*****

Cordy had cried herself to sleep every night, Dennis had wrapped her blanket around her, he had brought in food and drink but she just ignored them.  Her heart ached she missed him, missed them.

Wes had called again and he was worried about Angel it seemed that the vampire had stayed in his room and not moved.  The ex-watcher had begged her to come back but she had told him no even though she never meant it.  Climbing out of bed it was time to go back and see if anything can be salvaged.

*****

Cordy walked into the Hyperion smiling at everyone they smiled nervously back her, her eyes narrowed suspiciously.

“What’s going on?”  She asked.

“Nnnnothing.”  Wes stuttered slightly.

“Ok I’ll just head up and speak to Angel see if we can at least talk.”  Cordy turned and started up the stairs.

“NOOOO!!”  Gunn, Wes and Fred called out.

Cordy stopped and turned around to them her hands on her hips and suddenly a thought occurred to her.

“He’s not with Darla, is he?”  She asked her voice full of disgust.

The three looked at each other and laughed nervously. 

“Of course he’s not with Darla.”  We said trying to smile.

“That’s good, uhh how is she and you know the baby?”  The brunette asked.

“The baby is fine it seems to be normal, human and Darla well she is grouchy, bad tempered, the usual.”  Fred laughed as she told her friend.

Before they could stop her Cordy ran up the rest of the stairs and flung open the door of Angel’s room and they she stood stock still, her muscles had turned to stone.  Her heart stopped beating as she saw the image in front of her, tears threatened to spill from her eyes but she forced them back she wouldn’t let Buffy or Angel have the satisfaction.

Angel lay on his bed naked with Buffy straddling his lap.  Their eyes were closed with passion until they heard the door slam on the wall as it was opened.

“Your soul Angel.”  She whispered they were the first things she could think of her brain had just shut down, her heart was breaking and at that moment she knew why she had been upset about Darla, about Kate and why she hated Buffy.  Cordy was head over heels in love with the vampire with a soul and ironically she realised that as he was making love to his soul mate the one woman he would never get over.

“It’s permanent.”  He stuttered out his hands still holding Buffy’s hips, when he realised that he was still doing that he dropped them to the bed.

“Cordelia  I.”  Buffy started to say.

She raised her hand.  “Stop Buffy I just, I uh just came by to tell that I was leaving and that when I get visions I’ll uh phone you.”  Cordy could feel the tears threatening to fall she turned away and rushed out the door.

Angel pushed Buffy of him grabbed the sheet, which he wrapped around his waist and ran out the door after her.

The rest of the AI gang looked up as a sobbing Cordelia ran down the stairs and out of the door, it was daylight she placed her sunglasses on her eyes.  She had planned this in case the talk hadn’t turned out the way she planned and if she needed to make a quick escape, which she did.

Wes opened his mouth but before he could say a sheet wrapped Angel came running down the stairs followed by a similarly wrapped Buffy.

Wes, Gunn and Fred just turned away from the vampire and walked out into the garden Angel had truly done it this time.  Cordy would never forgive him for this, and it looked like they weren’t going to see much of here. 

Angel had ruined it for all of them.

*****

Cordy had just packed her clothes and personal belongings she said good-bye to Dennis and left.  She did leave a note for her friends telling that she loved them and she would be in touch and asked Fred if she wanted to take over the lease of the apartment she didn’t want Dennis to be left alone.

*****

Angel had finally managed to get rid of Buffy and managed to get the guys to let him go and see Cordelia and they guys kind of understood what had happened between the vampire and the slayer it still didn’t make it right, but Fred she was distraught she truly believed that Angel and Cordy belonged together but he had gone and messed it up.

He knocked on her door and it opened by itself he couldn’t hear her heartbeat panic attacked him inside.  Angel walked in and looked around all her pictures everything that made this her home was gone, it was just a furnished apartment and on the mantle piece were two letters one to Fred, Gunn and Wes he picked it up and placed it in his pocket and the other was to him. 

The vampire sat on the couch and stared at her handwriting and he slowly opened it as if it contained something dangerous.

Angel,

I am glad that you are going to have a child and I have no doubt
that you will be a great father.

Also you soul is permanent good for you broody boy you and Buffy can finally be together just the way you always planned. 

See things do work out.

I’ll call when I get a vision I have no idea where I am going but I will still help with your redemption the only way I can.

Goodbye Angel

Even though we had our problems I have never regretted not even for one moment when we met at that party you made my life worthwhile.

Love,

Cordy.

Angel held the paper tight to his chest as the tears started to fall, he had lost the one thing he truly loved with all his unbeating heart, what he felt for Buffy was nothing compared to what he had just lost, he had lost everything and it was his own fault there was no one else to blame.  He had been thinking about himself.

*****

6 months had passed and Cordy had found herself a small house in a small town where she worked as a waitress, she had told them that she had fits, which covered when she had a vision.  Everyone was very sweet and caring and they tried to set her up with numerous men in the town but she refused them all.

The story about her was that she had her heart broken, which made her laugh because it was actually the truth.  Cordy tried as hard as she could to forget the vampire but she couldn’t but also at the moment she couldn’t go back.

Wes had told her what he was doing with Buffy; it was the same thing with Darla all over again.  But deep down she was glad that the two of them had not gotten back together.  Angel now had a son, he named him Connor and Darla had staked herself so their child could live, at least the bitch had done something right.  They all had begged and pleaded with her to let them know where she was but she refused she still wasn’t ready.

“Well, well, well I see a seer but where is the champion?”  Said a male voice whispering in her ear, Cordy groaned and prayed that this was not who she thought it was.

TBC

It was a rainy night when he came into sight
Standing by the road
no umbrella
no coat
So I pulled up along side and I offered him a ride
He accepted with a smile so we drove for a while
I didn't ask him his name
this lonely boy in the rain
Fate tell me it's right
is this love at first sight
Please don't make it wrong
just stay for the night

All I wanna do is make love to you
Say you will
You want me too
All I wanna do is make love to you
I've got loving arms to hold on too

So we found this hotel
it was a place I knew well
We made magic that night. Oh
he did everything right
He brought the woman out of me
so many times
easily
And in the morning when he woke all I let him was a note
I told him 'I am the flower you are the seed'
We walked in the garden we planted a tree
Don't try to find me
please don't you dare
Just live in my memory
you 'll always be there

All I wanna do is make love to you
One night of love was all we knew
All I wanna do is make love to you
I've got loving arms to hold on too

Oh
oooh
we made love
Love like strangers
All night long
We made love

Then it happened one day
we came round the same way
You can imagine his surprise when he saw his own eyes
I said 'please
please understand
I'm in love with another man
And what he couldn't give me
was the one little thing you can'

All I wanna do is make love to you
One night of love was all we knew
All I want to do is make love to you
Come on
say you will
you want me too

All I wanna do is make love to you
One night of love was all we knew
All I want to do is make love to you
Say you will
you want me to

All night long
All night long

All night long
All night long.

Chapter 3

Middle of Nowhere, USA

“You have to be kidding me.”  Cordelia muttered as she stared into the blue eyes of Lindsey McDonald.

“So I repeat I see a seer but no champion.”  He gazed at her she could see his mind working overtime trying to solve this problem in his head, trying to be prepared for everything.

“What do you want Lindsey?”  Cordelia asked she was tired; she wasn’t in the mood to play games.

“Lindsey you’re back.”  Mrs Pearce said grinning at the young man.  “All the young ladies will be happy about that.” Cordelia was sure she heard him groan.  “And you’ve met our new waitress Cord.”

Lindsey interrupted her.  “Yes Cordelia and I already knew each other we met up in LA we had some business that caused us to come in contact.  I was just asking why she was here and it seems by herself?”  The ex-Wolfram and Hart lawyer asked the elderly lady slyly and his grin got bigger as he saw the seer glare at him.

“Oh yes our little Cordelia here is all by herself and we have tried to set her up with some lovely young men but she doesn’t seem to be interested in them.”  Mrs Pearce said in a disproving voice.

“Maybe they’re a couple of 100 years to young.”  Lindsey whispered in her ear and winced as she elbowed him in his chest.

“Well it is good to see that she knows someone here.”  With that Mrs Pearce walked off leaving the two young people once again alone.

“Why are you here Cordelia?”  Lindsey asked, something had happened he wasn’t sure what but he was guessing that Angel had broken her heart and it had to be something serious after all she had stood by his side through thick and thin and even though they didn’t agree on anything the first thing on this young woman’s mind was the people she loved.

He had read her file about how she was in Sunnydale he had a hard time from putting what he had read about the rich bitch with the Cordelia Chase he knew and had gone up against, she was protective and caring, funny and understanding so why was Cordelia Chase seer for the champion for the Powers That Be here in this godforsaken town working as a waitress.

“Why are you here Lindsey?”  Cordelia asked raising an eyebrow as she watched him.

“I needed to get away and my car broke down here, and, well, I don’t know it kind of grew on me so I stayed.”  He muttered feeling stupid and he looked into her hazel eyes and waited for her to laugh at him but she didn’t and in her eyes she saw understanding.

“I drove and drove and I stopped here for gas I was so tired and I collapsed when I woke up the Dr had seen me and they all took turns in taking care of me, it was nice.”  She said with a sweet smile on her face.

“So how about getting a drink with me tonight?”  Lindsey asked not sure why he did.

Cordelia watched him carefully not sure what his motivations were but she didn’t want to be alone again, she wanted just to sit and talk with someone that understood and it looked like her only choice was and ex-evil lawyer.

“That sounds good, uhh I’ll see you at 7pm” She said and watched as he nodded he didn’t’ need to ask which bar because there was only one and maybe it would keep other guys off her back, what she didn’t know was that Lindsey was thinking that exact same thing and that he was also looking forward to spend some time with her.

Cordelia shook her head of the retreating back of Lindsey.

“What the hell am I doing?”  She muttered echoing the same thing that her voice in her head had been screaming at her as soon as the two of them had started to talk and she had had not told him to leave her the hell alone.

Mrs Pearce came back over and joined her with a small mysterious smile on her face.

“So you and Lindsey then?”  She asked slyly looking over at the young woman whom she had adopted as the Cordelia seemed so lost and alone.

“There is no me and Lindsey we are just going to…” Cordelia paused what were they going to talk about.  Gee Lindsey how did you enjoy your first meeting with Angel when he pushed your vampire client through a window in broad daylight?   How did you enjoy help giving me visions 24/7?  This one was a goody Lindsey how’s your evil hand?  Cordelia sighed she could always ask how he enjoyed being second best to Angel?  Her heart dropped as she thought about the vampire that had stolen her heart and then broken it.  Her mind was made up she was going to meet up with him.  “We are going to talk about old times.”  She told the nosey woman, she knew that all Mrs Pearce wanted to see people happy.

“I am sure it will be good to talk to an old friend.” The old woman’s eyes glittered with happiness.

“Yes old friends.”  The brunette pasted a fake smile on her face, she didn’t want to disappoint her old friend and how would she explain her ‘friendship’ with the lawyer.

*****

Hyperion Hotel, LA

Angel was in hell, really he was, and the 100 years he spent in what he thought was hell was actually heaven.  Angel managed to sneak away from the nightmare that was his life, he closed the door of his bedroom and tried to block everyone and everything out, as soon as it closed he clicked the lock into place and leant his head again it trying to block everyone out, he was tempted just to move along a bit and start banging his head on the wall, it sounded like much more fun than his life at the moment.

Buffy had gone back to Sunnydale after ‘the incident’ but she had started to phone every night and Angel was beginning to run out of excuses.  She had popped up a couple of times and she was back AGAIN.   What was going on in Sunnydale?  Were all the vamps and demons taking a group holiday?  But the was thing was, and he couldn’t believe he was saying this, that the petite blonde kept touching him, brushing his arm, his shoulder, whispering in his ear and every time she walked past him she would rub her body against his, even if they were in the middle of the lobby and if she told him one more time that ‘you make me feel’ he was going to scream.  The vampire knew that Buffy had been through a lot and he was trying to be understanding but he also had a very pregnant and very irritable Darla in the house.  So there is a vampire and a slayer who hate each other.

Angel rubbed the bridge of his nose, he truly had screwed up, again and the one person he could talk to, the person who made him laugh no matter what the situation.  The person he told everything to wasn’t around and that was his fault.

“Angel man.”   Gunn called out from the other side of the door as he knocked.

Sighing Angel stepped back unlocked it and opened the door carefully hoping that the blonde leach was not in sight.  He poked his hand around the door and carefully looked up and down the corridor lucky enough it was only Gunn.

Gunn watched Angel warily check the corridor out, he couldn’t help it he started to laugh, it was amusing, well a first, and if you didn’t have to be around it all the time watching Buffy ‘the vampire slayer’ Summers chasing Angel the Scourge of Europe around the hotel, he tried to stop laughing at the glare he was getting from his friend, from the former leader of Angel Investigations, it just made the black man laugh harder.

“What is it?”  Angel growled this was the first time he had managed to be alone.

Gunn stopped laughing and could see how tired Angel was, how this was all starting to take its toll on him, the street fighter knew that the vampire could have dealt with anything, if Cordelia had been here.  Shaking his head and the irony of it all Angel had been in love with Buffy for so long and now that he had moved on and fell in love with Cordelia he is stuck here with his ex-girlfriend wondering where the woman he loved was.

Gunn reached out and touched Angel on the shoulder.  “Just came to check if you were ok.  We’re worried about you?”

Angel gave Gunn a small smile.  “I’m fine.”

The two men looked at each other remembering the one person who would say that time and time again.

Angel nodded briefly to Gunn and shut the door, he slowly made his way to his bed and laid down, closing his eyes he sighed and his mind conjured up a beautiful brunette and at last he fell asleep and felt truly at peace, as he always did when he thought of his Cordelia.

“Cordy, love you.”  He mumbled in his sleep.

*****

Middle of Nowhere, USA

Cordelia Chase deep asleep after a double shift.

“Angel, love you.”  She mumbled and her soul lifted as his name escaped her lips.

*****

Middle of Nowhere, USA.

8 Months Later.

A very pregnant Cordelia Chase walked around the restaurant she worked, she loved these people in this town they had grown to become family, she smiled as a young man handed her up his plate as it was hard for her to bend down and pick them up.

Cordy was happy but there wasn’t a day go by when she didn’t think of Angel Investigations.  She phoned them whenever she had a vision and now it was getting more and more difficult but another pair of arms tried to catch her, they weren’t the arms she dreamt of every night and the calls were getting harder and harder, when they all begged and pleaded to tell them where she was, 6 months ago she would have said yes, she was ready and then something happened and she couldn’t go back like this she could never see them again.

A male hand touched her shoulder.

“Why don’t you marry me?  It is my child you are carrying.”  He said.

Cordelia turned around and stared into the blue eyes of Lindsey McDonald the father of her unborn child.

Chapter 4

Middle of Nowhere, USA

Cordy stared at Lindsey in amazement.  “You are kidding, marry you.”  She couldn’t believe he actually said that.  They had grown to become good friends as the months went by and they talked about their joint past and why they did what they did, but one night something had happened, it had been a party with lots of drinks and the next thing she knew she had woken up in the bed, in the arms of Lindsey.  He was as shocked as she was; memories of that night were still coming back to her and from what she could remember he had made it very enjoyable. 

Cordy blushed at that thought and Lindsey’s face was suddenly covered in a very masculine smile, she had once made the mistake of telling him that, they had started to talk about what had happened and they both told what memories they did have and she opened her mouth before her brain kicked in and told Lindsey that from what she remembered he was very good.

“Why not Cordy we are friends.”  He said with a smirk, the lawyer didn’t love her but had grown to care for her; she was his first real friend that he had ever had.

“Exactly we are FRIENDS, I don’t love you I never will.  Not like that” She told him honestly.

“I know that, I know you will always love Angel, but I don’t want our, my child raised without a father.”  His blue eyes glittered with honesty Lindsey did want his kid whatever it maybe to have the best start of life, to have the opportunities he never had.

“You’ll be around, you’ll see you child grow up.”  Cordy said smiling at him.

They just stared at each other for a moment longer before the both started to laugh; it was so surreal they were going to be parents, together of all things

Lindsey reached out and touched her swollen baby, he was in awe, inside of there was his child, and he was going to be a father.  It still didn’t really sink in, he was not sure if he would ever get use to it.  He looked up into Cordy’s hazel eyes shining with happiness but there was still the sadness deep down.  He saw how she missed her friends, her family and especially Angel.

As much as he had problems with Angel Investigations especially with the vampire, their first drink together had be full of tension but they were both lonely and they kept meeting up and gradually as the days an weeks went by and it surprised both of them that they did become friends and care for each other.

Lindsey smiled softly at her, she deserved to be happy he had never seen her have a vision before and the first time he saw one it scared the life out of him, how they hell did she manage to deal with them time and time again and also he had understand Angel more and why he was so protective of her, why they all were.   He reached out and took hold of hand.

“Let’s get you something to eat.”  Lindsey waited for her nod he turned and headed into the kitchen to make her some food.

*****

Hyperion Hotel, LA

Angel held the small child against his chest; he was so tiny he never had anyone that relied on him as much as his son, Connor did.  He gently stroked the smooth check amazed that he had a son, two vampires had a child it should have been impossible.

The vampires mind went back Darla, how she had been so upset and annoyed when she came to him almost to term but she had to start to act differently and then he found out, his child had a soul and Darla was sharing it with him and for once in her life she did something right, she sacrificed her life for their unborn child, she staked herself and all that was left in the dirty wet alley was a child on the hard, dark ground.

There was a knock at the door Angel looked up and smiled.  “Come in!”  He called out and in walked Fred with Connor’s bottle she walked to the bed and handed it to him.

“If you need anything else just call ok?” Fred said with a bright smile as she gently brushed the babies head, she laid her hand on Angel’s shoulder just for a minute before she left.

Angel took hold of the bottle and started to feed Connor.  “Oh Cordy if only you could see this.” He whispered tears forming in his eyes, it had been 8 long months since she had been gone and the only thing he knew was that she was alive, he had no idea where she was or what she was doing and everyday he woke up and waited and prayed that she would be back, she would walk through the hotel door and smile at him, forgive him and tell him she loved him as much as he loved her.

There was another knock at the door but he could already smell by her perfume that it was, Buffy.  She had been ignoring his child, and ever since Connor had been born she had started to wear the skimpiest of clothes and was up here more often.  It seemed that the slayer had forgotten what she did, killed vampires and was now trying to have a normal life with a vampire.  Angel shook his head he was going to have to have a talk with her and soon.

“What is it Buffy?”  He asked.

“Angel can I come in?”  Buffy asked from the otherside.

“I’m trying to feed my son.”  The vampire told her patiently.

“Can’t someone else do it?”   She whined.

Angel turned to the door and stared at it incredulously glad that the blonde was on the otherside of it right at this moment, if they were face to face he had no idea what he said but the one thing he knew was that she would definitely get the idea that she wasn’t wanted not by him and hadn’t been for a long time.

“No I can’t Buffy this is my son.”  Taking a deep breath he smiled down at Connor.  “Shouldn’t you be back on the hellmouth doing the slayer thing?”

The slayer frowned.  “But I thought that you and I, you know.”  She shrugged her shoulders at the door this would be so much easier for here if she could see her boyfriends face.

“There is no you and I” He called back.

Buffy opened the door without asking, her breath caught in her throat as she stared at the bare chested man on the bed with a baby curled up on it gripping one of his fingers and sucking on the bottle.

“Look Angel now that we are back together.”  She started to say and never noticed the look of horror on the vampire’s face.

“Woooo, hold it right there back together Buffy I don’t mean to be cruel you’ve been through a lot but this has got to stop, we are NOT back together.  I have told you so many times I have moved.”

Buffy raised her hand to stop him talking.  “I’ll go back to Sunnydale and give you sometime to think and then we’ll talk.”  With that she flounced out of the room.

Angel sat there staring.  “Son she’s not listening to me, Cordy is, was, just like that but I didn’t mind.”  He was going to have to talk to Wes maybe they could call Sunnydale and maybe one of them could make Buffy see that they were not getting back together in any shape or form.

*****

Middle of Nowhere, USA

Lindsey watched the young woman who had curled up on the sofa and had fallen asleep, he grabbed a blanket and covered, he chuckled ever so slightly if only the partners at Wolfram and Hart could see him now?  What would Lilah say?  But the truth of the matter was that he was happy, he had a home, a friend and a child.  He wished that the child could have been a woman he was in love with but you never know he could fall in love with her but Lindsey knew that it would get his heartbroken.

He turned to walk away when he heard her start to sob and one word escaped her lips. “Angel.”  It said in a breathy whisper.

“That’s it I’ve had enough.”  Lindsey grabbed the phone this might cost him his life but that amazing woman didn’t deserve to be this sad.

“I’d like to speak to Angel about Cordy, it’s Lindsey McDonald.”  He told the woman who had answered the phone.

*****

Hyperion Hotel, LA

“Angel, Lindsey McDonald is on the phone he says it’s about Cordy.”  Gunn yelled up the stairs as soon as Fred had told him.

Buffy had come down with her bags packed trying to talk the rest of AI into talking to Angel about where their relationship was going but they all had ignored her.

Angel came down the stairs as quickly as he could with his son in his arms whom he quickly passed to Gunn who was waiting at the bottom of the staircase.  The vampire glanced at the ex-watcher all both their faces has the same questions.  Why was Lindsey calling them to tell them about Cordelia?  And what had he done to her?

“What is it Lindsey?”  Angel asked and he listened to the reply that was coming.

The rest of AI knew that something was wrong as the hand that gripped the counter, his knuckles were getting whiter and whiter and he squeezed and squeezed.  Something had happened to their friend and Angel was not happy.

He placed it back onto the cradle and turned to them his eyes wide with confusion.

“Angel?”  Wes asked grabbing hold of Buffy as she made her way to the vampire.

“It’s Cordy she….”Angel shook his head still not believing what he had heard.

*****

Middle of Nowhere, USA

Lindsey smiled down at Cordelia he hoped that she understood and he hoped that he would live through this, if not he wanted a quick and painless death.  With all the vision pain and everything she has to suffer she did deserve to be happy and Angel didn’t deserve her but that is whom she wanted.

*****

Hyperion Hotel, LA

“Angel?”  Wes repeated again and watched as the vampire focused his gaze onto the rogue demon hunter.

“Cordy’s fine, she works as a waitress her and Lindsey have become, uhh friends.”  Angel couldn’t believe he was saying this but if Lindsey had lied he would hunt him down and hurt him, slowly and painfully it had been 8 very long months without her.

“Friends?”  Wes said doubtfully but there was something else, something that Angel had not yet told them and he was not sure he wanted to know.  “What else?”   He said reluctantly.

“Cordy is pregnant and Lindsey is the father.”  Angel told them softly Lindsey had told him that the two of them were not in love it was just one night and they had no idea why but the vampire was jealous the lawyer had managed t touch her and hold her in a way he never could.

Fred dropped the cup she was holding but no one moved as it shattered on the floor.

Chapter 5

Middle of Nowhere, USA

Cordelia’s hazel eyes slowly opened, the seer couldn’t believed that she had fallen asleep she seemed to be doing that a lot lately. Cordy tried to sit up and as soon as she moved a groan echoed from her mouth, her back was killing her, then suddenly some male arms wrapped around her given her the support and help to move and a hand gently rubbed on the bottom of her back in a very soothing way.

She smiled and looked into the face of Lindsey he had been so sweet and kind it was weird to think of him like this but he had helped he so much, there friendship had not suffered from the ‘incident’ and in a way it made them closer as friends.

“Didn’t mean to fall asleep on you, again” Cordy said grinning.

“That’s ok you need the rest and I did some thinking and I did, something.”  He muttered.

Hazel eyes narrowed suspiciously at him knowing that she was not going to like the answer.  “What exactly did you do?” 

“Look Cordy you’ve become the closest friend I have ever had and when you were asleep you were crying and you called Angel’s name.”  Cordy froze and she had this bad feeling that she knew where this was going.  “I called the hotel, told them you were pregnant with my child.”  He rushed the last sentence out he winced waiting for her to hit him, through something, scream.

“YOU DID WHAT?”  She screamed at him.

“I didn’t like seeing you hurting, they don’t know where we are.  Why don’t you go home?”  He told her softly as he brushed her hair away from her face.

“I can’t I mean you and I had one night together and now I’m pregnant and remember that don’t exactly like you.”  Cordy said quietly her anger melting away she knew that he wanted to help her, to make her happy but now that Angel knew how was she going to be able to phone him when she had the next vision.

“I know that but, look Cordy you need your friends, your family, you need Angel as much as it pains me to say it.”  Lindsey stared into her eyes trying to find out what she was thinking.  “If you want I’ll come back with you.”  He said suddenly and realising he meant it; he wanted to be around to see his child grow and he wanted to remain friends with Cordy.  Angel and the rest of the AI gang were not his favourite people or vampires but he had changed so maybe they could get along for Cordy’s sake, he knew that they would never be friends.

“You would do that for me?”  Cordy looked surprised and Lindsey nodded.  “I’ll think about it, ok.”  Her heart was pounding as she looked at the phone, for once in her life she was afraid of the phone, afraid that is she picked it up she would dial Angel’s number and if it rang she was terrified that her vampire would be on the other end.  Even just his voice caused a reaction in her body.  “Hormones.”  She muttered to herself.

Cordy never saw Lindsey smiling at her, his eyes full of care.  He still couldn’t get over the fact that they were friends.

*****

Hyperion Hotel, LA

Everything had stopped for him, Cordelia; HIS Cordy was pregnant by Lindsey McDonald.  The lawyer could have lied but there would be no reason for him to.  Everyone else at AI had taken it the same way he had, with shock, suspicion and disbelief.  Fred had rushed of to get something to clean up the mess she had made, Gunn grabbed his axe and started to clean it a little to fiercely and Wes stuck his head into a book.  No one truly believed it but there was that doubt deep within them all that it was true and the way things were going it was a good bet that Cordelia Chase was pregnant by Lindsey McDonald.

Angel didn’t care that she was pregnant by another man, they hadn’t been dating his seer never even knew that he loved her. The vampire had messed telling her 8 months ago. He really didn’t care, the vampire had his own child with another woman, and as long as she came home they would all raise the children together, the problem he had was, well, it was Lindsey, LINDSEY?  But what to do about the lawyer if he was anything like Angel, which from all there other meetings he wasn’t, the evil handed one would want to be around to see the child grow, would he manage to deal with that.  To be around the man who had hurt them and caused them problems on numerous occasions, also the man who was able to hold and touch Cordy in a way he never could, who had touched her.

What he needed to do was talk to his seer, they needed to come up with something he couldn’t carry on not seeing her, talking to her, just being with her.  Lindsey never told him where she was so Angel was guessing Cordy didn’t know about the phone call.

“Please call. Just talk to me that is all I want.”  He whispered to himself ever since she had been gone he had become half a man, half a vampire and he needed her to feel whole and his son needed a mother and he couldn’t think of a better person to do that with than Cordelia Chase.  Angel placed himself next to the phone and stared at it willing it to ring.

*****

Middle of Nowhere, USA

It had been a week and all of her time was spent staring at the phone and then there was Lindsey who wouldn’t leave the subject alone every time they saw each other.  She missed everyone, she missed the hotel and most of all she missed Angel.

The tall handsome brooding vampire, she closed her eyes and leant back she could see him so clearly holding his son close to his chest.  She knew that he was a great father, over-protective but good she had no doubt about that.

Cordy opened her eyes and turned back to the dreaded phone, she had no choice, she had to talk to him, and her heart ached just to hear his voice.

She reached over picked it up and dialled a number, it was a number she had memorised a number and waited for someone to pick it up in LA.

Wolfram and Hart, LA

“Here is the update.”  Said a male voice.

“Thank you.”  Lilah replied as she opened the folder and read through the contents.

Chapter 6

Hyperion Hotel, LA

The phone rang in the hotel, the sound echoed around the lobby.  Angel stood staring at it, his hand shook as her reached over and picked it up.

“Hello Angel Investigations, We help the helpless.”  He whispered hoping that is would be the sweet of voice of the woman he loved.

“Hello Angel.”  Said a feminine voice.

It sent a shiver down his spine, as she whispered in her ear.  He had missed her, his eyes misted with tears.

“Cordy.”   He choked out.

*****

Middle of Nowhere, USA

Cordy’s heart broke she could hear the loneliness in his voice, she had avoided talking to him and after each vision when she phoned she had managed to miss him.  This was the first time she had heard his voice in 8 months in reality, but every night he would whisper words of love in her ear as she slept.  A lot of the time that kept her going, it was the only time that she was truly happy but recently it hadn’t been enough, she was missing him during that time as well.

The dream she had been recently having over and over again it is misty and she is lost and then he appears in front of her, the smile on his face that she loves so much, she reaches out to him, his smile fades and then he begins to vanish and she never reaches him in time and she is left alone and that is when she starts to cry and wakes up her heart aching.

All the brunette wanted to do was to put down the phone and get to LA as quick as she could and run straight into his arms, this is one of the reasons she was glad that she had not spoken to him before this and now she was just waiting to hear the betrayal in his voice.

“So umm I understand Lindsey called you?”  Cordy said suddenly before she changed her mind and hung up on him.

*****

Hyperion Hotel, LA

Angel’s growled softly, he didn’t like that man touching her; he didn’t like any man touching her, anyone but him.

“Yes he did.”  Angel answered softly he paused for a moment.  “So it’s true then, the two of you are together.”

The vampire was surprised to hear a breathy laugh come down the phone line.

“God no, we’re friends. We got drunk one night, it still seems unusual that we fell into bed together but he has been good, it took a while to trust him but over the last 8 months.  I care about him.”  Cordy said the laughter dying from her voice.

“Why didn’t you come home?  I know I hurt you but I thought we could work through this, but you just vanished.”  Angel said angrily.

“I know Angel and I was going to but when I found out I was pregnant I just couldn’t face you, I felt like I had betrayed you.”  The brunette stopped suddenly when she realised what she had said.

A grin blossomed on Angel’s face; a bud of hope began to flower in his heart.  Maybe she felt more for him than she let on.

“Come home Cordy I know about it now, please.”  Angel begged her.

“Angel if I come back Lindsey will be coming with me, he wants to make sure me and the baby are fine and he wants to see his child grow.  I know you’re not going to want to have us at the hotel so we’ll find somewhere else.”  She muttered thinking ahead.

“WHAT???”  Angel yelled.

“Calm down Angel, what’s the problem?”  She asked impatiently.

“You’ll move in with Lindsey?”  The vampire asked.

“Not like that Angel, as roommates, duh!”  Cordy sighed.

“Well uh you can both stay here at the hotel.”  Angel told her while kicking himself he wanted her here and he wanted the lawyer as far as way as possible.

“Well thank you Angel, we’ll uhh phone you when we know what is happening.”

*****

Middle of Nowhere, USA

Cordy stood there and stared at the phone in her hand, she was sure she misheard what he had said.  And she was still standing there when Lindsey walked in.

A worried frown on his brow.  “Cordy?”  He asked as he rushed to her side.

“I just phoned Angel.”  She told him still staring off into space.

“And?”  Lindsey prodded.

“He said we could stay at the hotel.”  The brunette turned and stared into the shocked blue eyes of her friend.

“You’re kidding.”  He muttered.

“Nope, uhhh do you still want to come with me.”  Cordy asked nervously she was still afraid to see the guys by herself especially Angel.

Lindsey grinned at her, it always made him look younger and more innocent but she knew he was neither, but she accepted him now and she had always told him that if he hurt any of her friends or Angel ever again in any way she would go after him herself, he just laughed at her and told her that sounded like fun, but the grin disappeared and he promised that he wouldn’t hurt them, not if it hurt her.

“Miss the reunion, never.  I’ll be by your side ok.”  He looked at her and she nodded in agreement.

*****

Hyperion Hotel, LA

Fred, Gunn and Wes stared at Angel disbelief on their faces and Gunn was the one to say what everyone was thinking.

“Angel man, are you nuts?”  He asked the other two nodding in agreement.

“Look Cordy wants to come back and Lindsey is the father and he is coming back with her, if the two of them don’t stay here in separate rooms she will find somewhere else.  I don’t know about you guys but I want her back here.”  Angel told them emotionally.

Gunn, Fred and Wes looked at each other, a silent agreement was made.

“Ok Angel Lindsey can say here.” Wes said shaking his head still not believing that this was happened.

*****

Cordy had tears in her eyes as she drove away from a place she had called home for the last 8 months, her heart pounded in her chest and they weren’t even near LA yet.

“It’ll be alright Cordy.”  Lindsey told her as he glanced to the side seeing how nervous she was.  “Angel loves you.”

“Of course he does, he’s my best friend.”  She told him in reply.

Lindsey looked at her incredulously.  “No Cordy he is IN LOVE with you, as he wants to take you to bed, make made passionate love, jealous of other men, that kind of love.  He only said yes to me being there because he would do anything to have you back in his life.” 

“It doesn’t matter Lindsey, it’s never going to happen there is so much against us and the main one being his curse and he may not love me that is what you think and you could be wrong.”

“I’m not wrong you love him don’t you?”  Blue eyes stared ahead concentrating on the road.

“With all that I am.”  She whispered and stared out the window watching the countryside pass them by.

*****

Angel paced the lobby, he get glancing at the clock and then at the door.  Tension filled the air they were all nervous and excited at the same time.  They were getting their heart back. Of course things weren’t going to be the same but it didn’t matter as long as they were a family they could deal with anything.

“Angel?”  A very familiar voice said and everyone turned.  Angel walked forward and stared at the vision in front of him, pregnancy definitely agreed with her she was glowing.

“Cordy.”  He replied and as hazel eyes gazed into brown ones the whole world seemed to vanish just leaving the two of them. 

Chapter 7

Buffy walked down the stairs she had heard that Cordelia was coming back and that she was pregnant, but she didn’t see what all the fuss was.  She went over and touched Angel on the shoulder but he never reacted to her.  His eyes, his whole being was focused on the pregnant woman in front of him.

Angel couldn’t believe she was here finally, but she was still to far away from him.  He rushed to her and wrapped his arms gently around her waist and pulled her against him.  He buried his head in her hair and inhaled the scent that was all Cordelia Chase.

Cordy couldn’t believe that his arms were wrapped around her.  She was in heaven.  How she missed the feel of those strong arms, being held against that masculine chest.  The brunette wound her arms around his waist and closed her eyes sighing.

It seemed that they stood there for an eternity everyone in the room except Buffy had sill grins on their faces.  Buffy glowered this had gone on long enough.

“Angel?”  Buffy whined trying to get his attention.

Angel pulled away and stared deep into the eyes of his seer and smiled, he was home.

“Angel?”  Buffy said again.

Angel rolled his eyes and Cordy smothered a laugh she recognised that, it was something she was told that she did all the time.

“Buffy you are welcome to go home if you wish.  I am sure there are some vampires to slay and I bet your friends miss you.  I missed my best friend so I am going to spend some time with her.  If that’s ok with you?”  Angel asked.

She smiled and nodded.

“Angel get out of the way!”  Wes said pushing said vampire so he could hug his old friend.  “I’ve missed you so much.” 

“I’ve missed you too Wes.”  She said hugging him, tears forming in her eyes.  She was home again.

“Get out of the way English you are hogging her.”  The next thing she knew Gunn, the tough street fighter, held her. 

It was all too soon that he moved and she had some delicate arms around her from a petite Texan who was sobbing.

“Fred it is ok sweetie.”  Cordy said stroking the head of her friend, of someone she considered a sister.

There was a cough from the doorway and everyone turned around and standing there his arms full of luggage was Lindsey.

Cordy glanced at Angel and waited to see what he was going to do.  Lindsey was her friend and helped her through a lot of things; he was there when she needed a shoulder to cry on or a helping hand.  She had no idea what was going to happen now and whether Lindsey would be able to fight the pull of Wolfram and Hart.  Would they come after him again to join them?

The vampire knew how much it meant to Cordy so he walked forward slowly and reached out taking some of the luggage.

“Welcome Lindsey and thank you for being around for Cordy.  Is there any more luggage?”  Angel asked his voice very controlled.

“Yes.”  Lindsey muttered not sure what to do in this situation.

Angel turned around to Gunn and Wes nodding at them, with a quick nod back they headed outside to get the rest of the bags.

“Would you like to see Connor?”  Angel asked he desperately wanted to add that soon he would have a little brother or sister, but he couldn’t it wasn’t his child.

Her 100watt smile appeared of her face.  “I would love to Angel.”  She took out hold of his hand that he held out and led her up the stairs, the two of them were in their own world and everyone baring one person was happy about it.  Buffy glared as she watched them head up the stairs.

The finally arrived into Angel’s room and Cordy leant of the crib gazing at the small child, soon she would have one of her very own.  The vampire sat on his bed and just watched her.  Her beauty was timeless but more that that a light shone within that made her stand out, she had that special something if you were one of the people she showed it too, her smile, her laugh always brightened up his darkest hour.  His heart ached as he remembered how much he had missed her.

She stood up and turned to him, he was watching her intently.  She raised her eyebrow at him and his just grinned.

“I’m sorry for lying to you I..” He stuttered she rushed to his side and sat on the bed next to him, she placed a hand on his cheek and he leaned into her warm touch, closing his eyes he savoured her touch, her heat.

“Angel it’s ok, it’s past.”  She replied softly.

“I missed you, I missed you so much.  Not seeing you, not hearing your voice it killed me.”  He said huskily, Angel couldn’t play again games with her, couldn’t pretend he was indifferent.  All the time that had passed without her, he couldn’t, he wouldn’t do that again and the vampire was going to do whatever he had to so that she would remain in his life, even if that meant being nice to Lindsey, but if the lawyer did anything to hurt her, the baby or his family he would kill him without a second thought.

“Oh Angel I missed you to.”  She sobbed in reply burying her head in his shoulder, the tears wetting his shirt. 

He wrapped an arm around his waist and held her while she wept.  “It’s ok sweetheart.”  Angel whispered not realising the endearment.

Their eyes locked the emotions easily read in both of their eyes and slowly Angel lowered his head, just a taste that was all he needed all he wanted and then he would be happy he could live with that, and he ignored that little voice that was calling him a liar and as their lips touched they both truly felt as if they had come home, it was just a gentle kiss to start off with.

*****

Wolfram and Hart, LA

A male voice of the speakerphone spoke to Lilah.

“They are both in LA at the Hyperion Hotel.”  It said.

“And they are still alive?”  The attractive lawyer frowned at this information, this should not be happening like this Lindsey should at least be dead.

Chapter 8

Angel’s Bedroom, Hyperion Hotel, LA

The kiss was slow and deep, it was just a taste, it was just one small kiss he kept repeating in his mind, but in his heart and soul he knew it could never be one small kiss between him and Cordy, it would always be more, it was their friendship, all the ups and downs they had been through together, it was the love he felt for her.  She owned every single part of him.

Cordy was drowning in emotions and she never wanted to be saved, she slowly moved her hands up his chest to his shoulders, she could feel the hard muscles beneath the dark shirt her wore.  Her fingers itched to touch the smooth pale skin below.  She loved him with everything she was, it felt like it was slow motion as he went to kiss her this was better than any dream, she was in heaven, she was in his arms.

Angel pulled away from her and smiled, his eyes bright, full of love.  He stroked a finger down her cheek and as if she were a cat she rubbed her head against his finger, he then slid it down her neck and down between the valley of her breasts and stopped on her swollen stomach.

Cordy took a deep breath, this was the part she dreaded, she was afraid to look up and see the disappointment and disgust in his face.  She was terrified that it was a kiss in the heat of the moment and the happiness of seeing her again and any minute he would realise what he had done and pull away.

He opened his hand and spread it out and he felt it, a kick and the vampire laughed.  There was a child growing within the woman he loved it was part of her which made it special already no matter who the father was.  He watched as his seer raised her head and stared at him shock and surprise written in her beautiful eyes.

“Angel?”  She whispered.

“I can’t believe that your baby is in there.”  Angel told her his voice full of awe.

Cordy smiled at the tone of his voice.  “You’ve had a child of your own Angel.  You were around when Darla was pregnant, you must have felt it.”

“It’s not the same it wasn’t someone I.”  Angel paused for a moment trying to collect his thoughts together.  “It wasn’t growing inside someone I love.”  His eyes remained on the ground; he couldn’t face her.  He had just put his heart on the line and now the ball was in her court.

Cordy was sure her heart stopped; she was sure that she had misheard him.  “Angel?”

His dark eyes met hers as he raised his head.  The vampire could see confusion but also hope in those beautiful orbs.

“I love you.”  Angel told her again and then it happened the biggest, brightest and the most stunning smile he had ever seen appeared on her face.  Now he remembered what it was like to be in the sun, what it felt like to have the heat on your skin and what it was like to have your heartbeat and to feel alive.  He felt that all again with that one smile.

“I love you too.  Angel I’m not sorry about having the baby, I wish it could have been with you but one miracle baby is enough don’t you think.  This wasn’t planned and Lindsey and I aren’t.”  She waved her hands around trying to explain.  “We’ve never been, it was just one night and we had some drink and boy doesn’t that sound wrong.”

Angel took hold of her hands and brought them to his chest where he placed them over his unbeating heart.  “It doesn’t matter Cordy, you are back home where you belong.  The rest of this we will deal with together just like we do anything else.  You’re tired I uhhh,” he stuttered.  “There is another room made up for you or you can umm.”

Cordy laughed how she had missed the stuttering, sweet adorable dork but she did manage to catch his meaning.

“I’d like to sleep in your arms Angel obviously we can’t do more me, well like this and you and your curse.”  She watched him, as she spoke there was change in his eyes Cordy had definitely missed something.  “What?”

“Uhhh the curse is not a problem anymore, the whole thing with Darla well the PTB didn’t want Angelus running around so they secured it.  But I mean there is no rush I just want to hold you in my arms and maybe kiss a little more if that is ok with you.”  Angel mumbled.

“I think that sounds like heaven.”  She muttered feeling exhausted and emotionally drained.  “What about Buffy?”

Angel groaned.  “I’ll tell you once we are in bed ok?”

She nodded in agreement, with a groan she sat on the bed and tried to get her shoes of and sighed in frustration.  This is when Lindsey or someone in the café had usually helped her.  Closing her eyes and taking a deep breath she was just about to ask for help when she felt some cold hands on her feet.  Cordy opened her eyes and down on his knees was Angel gently taking of her shoes and massaging her feet.

*****

Lobby, Hyperion Hotel, LA

Gunn, Wes, Fred and Lindsey were looking up the stairs with smiles on their faces and they all shook their heads as they looked at each other amazed at the weirdness that was their lives.

“Who the hell does she think she is?”  Buffy muttered as she paced.  “She comes in here and acts all sweetness and light but we all know what she is, she’s a”

“Stop right there.”  Lindsey told her in a deadly quiet voice.  “I love her as a friend, so if you want a problem go ahead and finish that sentence.  Cordy is one of the most loving and most forgiving person I know and I won’t allow anyone to say anything bad about her especially when it is not the truth.”  His blue eyes glinted becoming cold as ice as he stared at the petite blonde.

The rest of AI walked forward.  “We won’t allow it.  This is Cordy’s home, it isn’t and has never been yours.”  Gunn said to her, anger evident in his voice.

“We’ll see what Angel has to say about that?”  With that she flounced up the stairs to Angel’s room followed closely by everyone else and she flung the door open and her mouth opened and closed at the sight before her.

Angel was laying in bed with his arms wrapped around Cordy and they both looked at peace and happy.  They looked like they belonged together and they did.  Buffy opened her mouth to wake them up when Lindsey covered her mouth with his hand and they all dragged her out of the room and closed the door softly behind them.

A pair of male eyes opened and he smiled, he may not trust Lindsey but it was obvious that he cared about Cordelia, they probably would never be friends but at the moment they weren’t enemies, he looked down at the brunette he held and he felt truly at peace, if his soul had been secured he would have lost it when he held his son for the first time and he would have lost it again right at this moment.

*****

Buffy glared at them and she hit Lindsey as he let her go.  She knew that Angel would hate if she hit any of his friends, she stormed out of the hotel to cool down and when she got back and Angel was up this would all be sorted out.  He was only being nice to Cordelia that was all there was nothing else to it. 

****

Wolfram and Hart, LA

Lilah paced backwards and forwards in her office Lindsey and Cordelia had been at the hotel for a while and there seemed to be no problems.  That shouldn’t have happened, she needed to step things up.  There had to be something she could do, her phone rang sighing she picked it up.

“Yes.”  She said sharply and slowly a smile began to form on her face.  “That will be perfect.  Start it straight away.


 

Chapter 9

Lobby, Hyperion Hotel, LA

Lindsey cradled his jaw he knew that he was going to have a hell of a bruise but he was lucky that she didn’t use all her strength not that it mattered even she did and he knew that she would he still would have stood up to her to protect Cordy.  She was his only real friend in this world and they were going to have a child together.  They would never love each other in a romantic way but he was going to be there for her.  The first steps on making her life easier would be at least trying to make friends with her family. 

Some of them had seen what he had done and how many times he had tried to kill them off.  He hated this but he was the one who was going to have to make the first move.  With his hand still against his jaw he looked at them in the eyes.

“What do you think we should do?”  He asked.

“About what?”  Gunn asked suspiciously.

“About the little blonde with the attitude who seems to want Angel.  Now I know we’ve had our differences and I’ve tried to have you killed or tortured but I have changed a lot of it has to do with that young woman laying upstairs.  There’s just something about her and of course that brutal honesty that keeps banging at any of your walls like a sledgehammer until they finally give in.  I want her to be happy and that is here with Angel she loves him and you guys.”  Lindsey stopped for a moment taking a deep breath.  “I will do anything to make sure that she is happy and I will do what I have to.  I am not going to let little Miss Slayer ruin that.”

Gunn nodded at him, his eyes defrosting a little.  “It’ll take time for us to trust you if we ever do but we managed to forgive Angel for all the shit he has done to us so well I’ll give you a go.”

Wes nodded in agreement, Lindsey turned around looking for Fred but she seemed to have vanished and then something delicate touched his hand turning he stared at the petite Texan and she smiled sweetly at him and held a tube in her hand.  Lindsey looked at her dubiously not sure what was in it.

“Don’t worry this is an ointment that will help keep the bruising to a minimum and help it heal quicker.”  She held out her hand.  “Trust me?”

Lindsey froze for just a second he was not use to this there were not that many people he did trust well there was one.  He reached out and took hold of her small hand and let her lead him to the sofa.

Once he was seated Fred stood in between his legs and placed one hand under his chin and tilted it and gently with her free hand she rubbed the ointment in as gently as she could she didn’t want it to hurt any more that it already was.

Lindsey closed his eyes and sunk into that gentle touch it was nice to feel cared about apart from Cordy no one had done that in such a long time if ever.  He knew Darla never loved him and now he wasn’t sure if he had ever loved her, he had obsessed over her yes but love he no longer was sure.  All she ever wanted apart from inflicting pain was Angelus and if she had to she would even settle for Angel, he sighed and breathed deeply he was sorry that she was dead again but maybe after sacrificing her life for her unborn child that she would finally get some peace.  Everyone deserved that at sometime in their lives.

“Lindsey?”  Said a soft Texan twang.

Lindsey opened his eyes are realised that she had stopped but he was still leaning into her touch he moved away abruptly.   “Uhh sorry about that.”  He mumbled. 

He was so different now, he got so tired of fighting all the time but he was lucky enough to wander into a small town full of generous people but he was still closed off and then she came into his life Cordelia Chase the seer to his then nemesis at first they argued, then they talked and then they became friends he didn’t know how she did it but he was guessing Angel had felt like him at some point waking up and that a certain honest brunette had wormed her way past all the barriers they had put up as if they were smoke and once she was there you didn’t want her to leave, you weren’t sure that you would live without her in your life.  The only difference between the two of them was that Angel was hopelessly in love with her, he loved her but now as a sister it become more like that after the night they spent together.

“That’s ok.”  Fred told him with a smile her face flushed red as those blue eyes stared at her with interest taking it what he could about her, she knew it was because they had never met and he wasn’t sure about her.  “We haven’t really met I’m Winifred Burkle but everyone calls me Fred it’s nice to meet you Lindsey.”  She held out her hand.

Lindsey smiled back at her a full open and honest smile she was very sweet he took hold of her hand and just held it for a minute and they just stared at each other and suddenly they both realised what they were doing and dropped their hands and stepped back.

“So about Buffy?”  Lindsey said turning to the others.

Angel’s Room, Hyperion Hotel, LA

Angel couldn’t sleep, who was he kidding he didn’t want to sleep he was afraid that when he awoke that this was a dream and he would be alone again, only half a life not knowing where the best of his was but he also just loved to watch, to see the small movements and sounds made as she slept, the way she was curled against him full of trust.

He stared at her face for just a moment longer and then his gaze roamed the rest of her body until it landed on her swollen stomach.  Angel reached out and laid a hand on it again and he felt it kick and the vampire couldn’t help it he smiled what he didn’t notice was a pair of large hazel eyes open and stare at him and watched with amusement that a child, one that was not his gave him such joy when it kicked.

“Having fun?”  She whispered.

Angel’s eyes whipped around to hers.  “I didn’t wake you did I?” 

“No you didn’t.  Angel we really have to talk we have a lot to get through there is a lot of emotional baggage.  If we are going to be together we need to sort through it.”  Cordy told him her eyes full of fear afraid that he was going to change his mind.

“Ok I’ll do anything I have to if it means that we can be together.”  The vampire said with a smile.

“Me too.”  Cordy whispered back and as they continued to stare at each other they leaned in and gently kissed each other it was gentle and loving just how it should be.

They both pulled back with identical goofy grins on their faces.

“So about Buffy?”  The brunette asked.

Angel settled and pulled her more tightly against him.

“You know I had never been so sorry.  When you learnt about me and Darla and I saw your face I was ready to stake myself and as the days went by and you never came I thought I had lost you.  Wes thought it was a good idea for Buffy to visit to see if she could snap me out of it but she was just as lost as I was and we reached for each other just in comfort and that is when you arrived I threw her off my grabbed a sheet and ran after you but you ran out into the daylight and I couldn’t follow by the time I could you were gone and I had no idea where and each phone call I missed when you had a vision it killed me, I couldn’t be there to hold you when you had one and then the jealousy hit who was holding you?  Who were you spending time with?  These thoughts were running around in my head and there was no way for me to find out the truth and then the months passed and nothing diminished I still missed you as much as I did the first day.”  Angel opened himself up to her completely.

“Thank you Angel I forgave you a long time ago, I hope you have forgiven me too.  So why is Buffy still here then?”  Cordy asked him before he could say anything else her hormones were all over the place and she was already on the verge of bursting into tears.

Angel groaned.  “Well after you left she gave me a kiss and went back to Sunnydale and something must have happened because all she kept doing was either phoning or just arriving on the doorstep, the first time she went to sleep she headed to my room but we managed to stop that and it was just getting worse and then of course having a pregnant Darla here that was so much fun.”  He added sarcastically.

“Angel can we get through this, I mean all of this.”  Cordy asked him honestly.

“We can get through anything as long as we are together and I’m not going to lose you.  I thought I did before but never again.  I can’t be without you.”  Angel told her earnestly.

*****

Somewhere in LA

Buffy wandered the streets not knowing what to do next, she came here to be with Angel but nothing was working out as planned.  She stopped as something bit into her neck, reaching up and pulled a dart out from her neck and the ground came up to meet her.

Chapter 10

Buffy had been missing for a day now, it wasn’t the first time that she had vanished and they knew that she could take care of herself but that didn’t stop any of them from worrying.  Her life kept being snatched away from her things kept changing.  So Wes phoned Sunnydale and told them what was going on without giving too many details and asked if they could phone them if she appeared back home could they phone them here in LA and they would do the same if she came back to the hotel.

Cordy slowly made her way down the stairs she was feeling like a beached whale and she was only getting snatches of sleep because of all the kicking the baby was doing, Cordy did love being pregnant and having this life growing inside of her but at the same time she couldn’t wait for it to be over.  She finally made it and collapsed on the sofa she was so tired all of the time. 

Fred moved away from Lindsey’s side whom she had been talking to all day and she made her way over to Cordelia and sat next to her staring at her stomach in fascination.

“Cordy can I?”  She waved her hand at the large stomach.

Cordy just smiled at her, it was nice to have her family around and they seemed to be just as excited as she was.  “Of course Fred.”

Fred gently placed her hand on it and almost immediately she felt the baby kick and her face lit up and a giggle escaped from her and she stared in awe at the person she considered at sister.  It didn’t take long before Wes and Gunn were also at her side and their hands next to friends and they were all laughing with each kick and Cordy grimaced a little each time but she didn’t mind, she was just happy to see their faces light up with excitement.

Angel made his way down the stairs to a lot of laughing and all of Angel Investigations surrounding Cordelia with all of their hands perched on her pregnant stomach and in his arms he carried his little bundle of joy.  The vampire still couldn’t get over the fact that he had a child and soon Cordy would be having one as well.

It was funny how domesticated he had become changing diapers, the late night feeds and he enjoyed every second of it and now his son was going to have a little brother or sister because that is how they were going to be raised they were all family.

Angel looked around and smiled his family was back together again, and then his gaze fell onto Lindsey.  It was hard to trust him after all that he had done, but then look at everything he had done in his life and he had been forgiven time and time again.  Angel would try for Cordy’s sake, he wasn’t sure if he could but looking at the ex-lawyer he could see how much he did love Cordy and how much he took care of her, but the look was not one of a romantic nature because Angel was not sure how he would have handled that.  But then something caught the vampire my surprise it was the way Lindsey looked at Fred, he looked confused about something, it was as if there was a puzzle in front of him and he was trying to solve it.

Then the young Texan turned to him and smiled, Lindsey returned it and the two of them looked at each other just for a moment.  Angel could feel his lips quirk into a grin, this seemed eerily to familiar it was how he and Cordy had started their friendship even though neither of them knew where it was going to end up.   If the two of them were meant to be he hoped they had an easier ride then he did, but also he wouldn’t change what had happened for the world because look where he was.

Just then the doors opened and in staggered a disheveled Buffy her face pale and her hair matted.   Wes and Gunn rushed to her side.

“Buffy where have you been?”  Wes asked her the sound in his voice and the look in his face showed that he had been really worried but before she could say anything she collapsed and Wes managed to grab her before she hit the ground.

“Take her upstairs Wes, Fred can you come and take Connor?”  He called out taking charge of the situation.

Fred came over and took the little bundle from him and Angel helped Cordy to her feet and he walked with her as they made their way behind Wes and up to Buffy’s room.

“What do you think is going on with her?”  Cordy asked leaning into Angel’s touch.

“I’ve no idea but we better find out and figure out a way to help her?”  Angel said and gave her a little squeeze.

When they arrived at the bedroom Wes had already laid Buffy down and was sitting next to her taking her pulse and just then Buffy’s eyes fluttered open.

“ANGEL!!!”  She screamed.

“What is it?”  Angel asked as he made his way to her side.

“I love you, don’t leave me.”  Buffy whispered softly and slowly her eyes began to droop and finally closed.

“She’s sleeping.”  Wes told them.

Cordy looked at Angel and then at Buffy not sure what was going on but there was something wrong and she was really started to get worried.  Her and Buffy were never really friends but she saved the world and risked her life day in and day out.

“Cordy remember that I love you and that’s not going to change.”  Angel reassured her and kissing her softly.

“Come on guys let’s leave her to sleep we can find out more information when she wakes up.”  Wes said with a last glance at the sleeping young woman and he gently closed the door behind them.

As soon as the door closed Buffy started to toss and turn her dreams were dark and dangerous.  There were voices whispering terrible things in her ears, things she tried to block out but couldn’t.

*****

Wolfram & Hart, LA

Lilah grinned evilly as she took a sip of her drink the game had only just started and she was going to win it.  Angel Investigations had no idea what was coming and there was no way they were going to be able to stop it.

Chapter 11

Angel and Cordy’s Bedroom

Angel stood there watching Cordy sleeping as she curled up in his bed he smiled to himself, no their bed.  The blankets tucked under her chin, little soft breaths coming from her mouth as she breathed deeply while she slept. Angel felt like any minute he would wake up in that very bed and be alone.  He could sit and just watch her forever and he would be happy.

Angel bent over and kissed her softly on the head.

“Angel love you.”  She mumbled in her sleep and the smile that appeared on his face was breathtaking he would never get sick of hearing those words come from her mouth.

“I love you too Cordy.”  He whispered back knowing that she couldn’t hear him but having to say the words anyway.  Angel would always love her, there would never be anyone in his heart like she was and he knew that with certainty.

Angel still couldn’t believe that she loved him that she wanted to be with him.  It was a dream come true and he would do what ever he had to so that dream stayed alive.  Angel would do what he could to make her happy, but he knew there would be hard times and arguments but he also knew that they would get through them together.

Sighing as much as he hated to leave her he had to, he had to find out what they had come up with about Buffy something was definitely going on with her.  He stood and stared at his beloved for just a moment longer and then headed out the door.  If only he could lock up all the people he cared about safely and to make sure that they would never be hurt again.  But Angel knew that was not possible, they had a dangerous life and they would stick together no matter what was ahead of them.

*****

The Lobby

Angel slowly walked down the stairs, a smile still gracing his face as he looked at his family.  They could deal with what ever was thrown at them as long as they were together and it took a long time to get back to where they were and he was going to make sure that it stayed that way for a long time.

Fred looked up and smiled at her once hero.  She still had some feelings for him but they were starting to change to more brotherly and it was right that he and Cordy were together, they are both heroes, both larger than life personalities.

“So what have we figured out?”  Angel asked.

“Well blondie could have gone out and got drunk.”  Gunn said stating the obvious.

“Well let’s not forget who she is and what we do.  With our line of work I am guessing that the normal answers may not work here.”  Wes muttered making sure that no one jumped to any conclusion they were going to keep their options open.

“Well we aren’t going to find out any information until Buffy wakes up.  So I suggest we all try and get some sleep before something else happens.”  Fred said with a grin.  She was feeling more and more like family and liked to add her thoughts as well.

Lindsey watched everyone this was strange for him, but he had started to slowly get use to the idea of actually trusting people. But this was definitely the place he expected to be.  His gaze fell onto Fred, she was an odd one but there was something appealing about and boy she had the brains, he didn’t think he had met anyone like her before.

*****

Angel and Cordy’s Bedroom

Cordy started to toss and turn but as soon as she started her body froze and the most beautiful smile appeared it was stunning, she looked like an angel.  Her face was full of love and peace as images flowed through her mind like a gentle stream bathing her in the goodness of each one.

She could feel the good emotions pour from them and entering her very being, the images of what her heart desired, of what the future could possibly hold.  Were they visions or were they just dreams or of what she wanted?

*****

Buffy’s Bedroom

Buffy also started to toss and turn at the same time as her high school nemesis but her dreams were full of horror, of the things that had yet not been committed, of what she had not yet committed.  Dark images coloured her mind of blood, voices whispered in her ear telling her what she had to do.  Telling her of the excitement that she would feel when she had done these atrocities, her body shivered in anticipation.

Deep down in the recesses of her mind Buffy’s consciousness screamed to be released.  She cried and yelled knowing what her body was going to do but helpless to stop it.  She had been a fool, her hate and envy was going to be the downfall off her.  Buffy hoped that she would be stopped before it was too late but no matter how she struggled it was in vain.

The sleeping woman’s eyes opened but there was no warmth, no compassion and no life in them.  Buffy’s body moved mechanically as she climbed from the bed picking up a crossbow and knife before heading out of the room.

*****

The Lobby

Lindsey smiled at Fred before he turned to head up the stairs to get some rest but he would pop into to see Cordy first, when he had asked Angel, the vampire nodded in agreement.  The ex-lawyer looked up to the slayer walking down the stairs.

“Hey Buffy it is nice to see you up and about.”  He said cheerfully.

But before anyone else could say anything she raised the crossbow and fired it.  Everyone stood frozen they were surprised and too shocked to move it had been like they had been put on pause but as if someone had hit the play button everything move again as the arrow entered Angel’s arm.

Fred ran to Angel’s side to help him, Wes and Gunn to the stairs but just as they made it Buffy shoved Lindsey backwards so he was pushed into the two behind him and then she took of running back up the staircase.

“Oh My God.  She’s after Cordy.”  Fred screamed her face full of terror.

Chapter 12

Buffy ran quickly up the stairs her face emotionless, her eyes empty the knife clutched tightly in her hand.  The slayer never once turned around to see if she was being chased, she had a mission to complete and that was all that was on her mind.  She stopped for a moment at the wooded door, staring at it knowing that her prey was trapped within.  In a few seconds it would all be over the predator would kill her prey.

Deep inside of the shell that was Buffy Summers her mind was locked away screaming and crying knowing what she, what it was planning to do.  Cordelia might not have seen eye to eye and she was jealous of the ex-cheerleaders relationship with Angel but the last thing she wanted was to see Cordelia hurt or killed especially since she was carrying a child.  This was the first time in her life that Buffy felt totally helpless and she knew it was her fault all the anger, jealousy and hate led her to this point, to kill someone who was doing what she could to help people.  No one would ever forgive her for this, she would never be able to forgive herself if she managed to get control back of her body.

The hand on the doorknob twisted it and pushed the door open and she walked into the welcoming darkness.

*****

Angel and Cordy’s Room

Cordy’s dreams, if that was what they were suddenly turned dark, blood dripped from the walls, day was turned into night, and the air was filled with screams of terror and pain.  There was death and destruction in every direction she looked.  The world that she had seen before the love, the happiness, the peace was eaten away and Cordy watched the world crumble around her if whatever was coming wasn’t stopped and one by one human life would eventually be extinguished and the world would be overrun by demons.

Cordy’s eyes snapped open and then she screamed, it was ripped from deep within her, it was a cry full of pain, fear and anguish at the darkness that could befall them all.  The scream was cut off as Buffy grabbed her by the throat and slammed her against the wall, the noise echoing around the room.

*****

Angel ripped the arrow from his shoulder and was running up the stairs before Fred, Gunn, Wes or Lindsey could move.  The scream scared Angel but the sudden stop of the noise and the quiet afterwards was deafening and it fed fear straight into his very soul, fear for his beloved, and his heart.

He ran through the open door to their bedroom and there was the petite blonde slayer gripping Cordy by the throat squeezing the very life out of her and in her other hand was the knife.

“NOOOOO.”  The roar was ripped from Angel’s throat as he moved and in a blink of an eye he had grabbed Buffy and pulled her away from Cordelia.

Buffy took hold of Angel and moved so she landed on top of him as they both fell to the ground and she sank the knife deep into his flesh.

Cordy shook her head trying to clear it, she looked around the room looking for Angel and in the centre of the room was the vampire and slayer.  Angel pulled the knife out of his own body and aimed it towards Buffy’s heart.  All rational thought had fled from his mind, the demon within whispered all the things he should do to her because Buffy had tried to hurt what was his.

“No stop Angel.”  She cried out which turned to a cry of pain.

Angel froze her voice clearing his foggy brain, his gaze whipped around to her.  Cordy’s face was full of fear as she glanced down, her hands clutching at her stomach.  Angel’s gaze followed hers and saw the liquid at her feet.

“Angel it’s not Buffy.”  Cordy gasped at the pain coursed through her.

Angel dropped the knife, just then the others walked in.

“Take her.  Cordy says it’s not Buffy.  Find out who or what she is and what they have done to Buffy?  Lindsey we’ve got to go.”  Angel ordered.

“What, why?”  Lindsey asked confused at the sudden change of subject.

“You’re about to become a father.”  Angel muttered as he walked over and picked Cordy up and held her gently against his chest.

Lindsey froze his mind at shut down as soon as Angel mentioned father.  Fred walked up to him and smiling softly she took hold of his hand and pulled him along as they followed Angel and Cordy.

Wes and Gunn grabbed hold of Buffy and took her down to the basement where they chained her up.  Some research was needed they had to find out what the hell was going on?

They climbed the stairs back to the lobby their minds going over what had happened and then the two of them looked at each other and grinned.

“Cordy’s having her baby.”  Gunn said with awe.

“Cordy’s having a what?”  Muttered a voice full of disbelief.

Wes and Gunn turned and standing there was Xander, Anya, Willow and Spike.

“Cordy just went into labour.”  Wes answered as if it were obvious.

Chapter 13

Willow sat in the basement of the Hyperion Hotel and stared at her best friend, she desperately wanted to release her, she hated to see her friend chained up but after staring into the black holes, that were Buffy’s eyes she knew that there was no one home and her heart broke, hoping and praying that they would be able to get her back. A tear fell from her eye, she wanted her friend back, she needed her.

The redheaded witch reached out and took hold of Buffy’s hand. She frowned and looked closer as she noticed a small tattoo on it. Willow knew that Buffy had never gotten a tattoo.

“What the hell?” She whispered but knowing that there was one person that could figure it out. Willow stood and ran up the stairs to the lobby. “WESLEY!” She yelled at the top of her voice.

Wesley turned to her, his face full of confusion and worry, afraid that something more had happened to Buffy.

“What is it Willow?” He asked as he got to her side.

“There something on Buffy’s hand, a tattoo.” Willow explained.

“When did Buff get a tattoo?” Xander asked.

Willow and Wesley turned and glared at him, they shook their heads. Wesley grabbed a pen and paper and headed towards the basement.

Xander stood looking around. “What?” He asked not understanding.

Gunn walked over to him. “How did you ever get the chance to date someone like Cordy is beyond me?” He paused for a moment. “She didn’t get a tattoo. Whoever or whatever did this left it behind, which means we now have a clue something we can use to research and help get your friend back.” Gunn told him as simply as he could, then turned and headed towards the basement to join the others hoping that they maybe they could find other clues that would help to save her. Gunn just hoped that when she was back she was going to leave Angel and Cordy alone. His two friends deserved to be happy and he was going to make sure that they were, the two of them had been through so much and they deserved it now they had finally found their way to each other.

Xander watched the black man walk away. He hoped that they could help Buffy. If she had been so alone why couldn’t she have come to them? Why here to the vampire that broke her heart and it seemed he had done it again. Angel and Cordelia. Xander shook his head it boggled the mind, not as much as the thought that Cordy was going to be a mother. Cordelia Chase, Queen C, the bitch of Sunnydale High, was going to have a little helpless child. Ok, that he was still having problems with.

Angel sat on a chair besides Cordy’s hospital bed and just watched her sleep. He had never been more proud as he was of her then at this moment. He reached out and gently moved a piece of hair off her face and she had never looked more beautiful and his heart swelled with love. Angel was never going to let her go again; they had been through so much, they had fought many obstacles and because of it their love had grown. As long as they were together and they had their family nothing was going to stop them.

He softly stroked her cheek, her skin smooth beneath his fingers. The vampire could just sit here for an eternity and be perfectly happy just watching her, memorising every small detail. Someday he knew that she would die and he would be left alone but he wasn’t going to think about that he was going to love her with everything he was, for as long as he could. Cordy was his heart; his soul, his sun and she warmed him from the inside. She made him more human, Cordy helped him become the man, the vampire he was now and there was no way he could ever show her how much that meant to him, how much she meant to him but he was going to try.

“Angel.” A voice whispered.

Angel stared into her beautiful hazel eyes. He had been so deep in thought that he never even heard her heartbeat change and didn’t realise that she was waking up.

“Hey.” He whispered back. A smile gracing his face and his chest aching as she smiled the sweetest and the most beautiful smile he had ever seen.

“Beautiful isn’t she?” Cordy whispered as she leant into Angel’s touch.

“Yes, she takes after her mother.” Angel bent forward and kissed her gently, he closed his eyes, and her smell and taste overwhelmed his senses until there was only her.

Cordy sighed and fell into the kiss, she felt as if she were drowning. Her mouth parted beneath his. Angel’s tongue swiped across her lips and then entered the cavern of her mouth, touching, tasting and caressing everything, imprinting it all on his mind.

Angel pushed her further back onto the bed and without stopping the kiss he laid next to her. One hand tangled in her hair, the other hand skimming up and down her side.

Cordy didn’t want to stop this kiss but breathing was becoming a bit of a problem, so she pulled back and took a gulping breath of air. She cupped his face in her hands and stared at him.

“Angel I love you and that is not going to change but I need to make sure that you are happy that me, my child and Lindsey are going to be there. If you aren’t tell me now, I can’t.” She lowered her head. Cordy didn’t know how to tell him that if he couldn’t be happy like that, it wouldn’t work between them and it would kill her if he ever started to hate her. If he was forced into something he didn’t want to do.

Angel could hear her heart pound, he could smell her fear he placed his hand under her chin and forced her to look at him.

“Cordy listen to me. I love you, more than I have ever loved anyone. You know me inside and out. I will love your daughter as my own, she will have two fathers.” He sighed and took a deep breath. “I can’t promise anything about Lindsey, all I can promise is that I will try ok. He’s done so much to hurt us, to try and kill us. But” he placed a finger over he lips before she could interrupt him. “I can see how he cares about you and that does mean he is trying and I know you wouldn’t put us or your child in danger. Let’s see how that one goes but for everything else I want you here. Cordy I can’t, I won’t let you leave me again I would never survive without you knowing now that you love me.”

Cordy smiled at him, it seemed as if the weight of the world had now been lifted from her shoulders. She moved across so Angel could lay flat on his back and she laid her head on his chest as he wrapped his arms around her.

Lindsey stared through the glass in awe. He couldn’t believe that there was his child. She was so small and delicate and could be hurt so easily. Anger coursed through him at the thought of anyone trying to hurt his family, he would do whatever he had to do to protect them. But his family had grown there was Cordy, his daughter and now the rest of Angel Investigations and Lindsey knew that they would all protect his daughter with everything they had, but they would also show her love of a strong family.

“So how does it feel being a dad?” A timid voice asked.

Lindsey turned around and smiled at Fred.

“I don’t think it has really sunk in, all I feel at the moment is terror. I’m so afraid that I will fail her somehow.” He whispered.

Fred laid a hand on his chest a smile on her face as she gazed up at him.

“We’ll be here to help you and I think you’ll be a great dad.” The petite Texan told him honestly.

“I’ve done so many horrible things.” Lindsey stuttered a little suddenly feeling nervous.

Fred giggled and his eyes whipped to hers.

“Angel has done a lot worse then you and he is a great dad to Connor.” With that she kissed him on the cheek, but as she pulled their eyes locked together, everything seemed to slow down as Lindsey lowered his head and kissed her softly, chastely. But that delicate kiss ran through their bodies like electricity and curled their toes.

As they pulled back Fred looked shell-shocked the same expression was on his face as well. This was something that neither of them expected and they had no idea what to do they just stood their staring at each other for just a little longer and suddenly Fred smiled a shy smile at him and looked down at the floor.

Lindsey’s heart started to beat faster as he watched her for a moment longer.

“Me, a dad.” He said with a laugh as he turned his gaze back to his daughter, he could see from the corner of his eye Fred do the same. He reached out and entwined his fingers with hers and they just stood their staring at the beautiful little girl who had just been born into their family.

“Eureka.” Wesley said to himself as he stared at the picture of the demon that had done this to Buffy. He frowned something seemed odd to him, this isn’t a demon that would go after them or the slayer. It was time that they found out some information.

“So we have a way to cure Buffy then?” Willow asked hopefully.

“Not quite we do need to get some more information. Gunn stay here and keep an eye on things. Spike your with me let’s go and see what information we can get shall we.” Wesley ordered.

Gunn nodded and Spike just grinned, he was looking forward to this.

Chapter 14

Wolfram and Hart

Lilah paced her office from one wall to the other things weren’t suppose to work out like this, she was supposed to win just once and it was the perfect plan to get rid of Angel and Lindsey but no they both had to have ‘feelings’ for that damned seer and even Buffy, the amazing slayer couldn’t kill that damn bitch. Just once she would like a plan to go right for her. But it wasn’t over yet and even if she had to do it herself and no matter how long it took she would make Angel and Lindsey pay and for that Cordelia Chase had to die.

Spike and Wes walked backed into the hotel, blood spattered their clothes a bruise was starting to appear on the rogue demon hunters face, but they both had smiles and in one of Wesley’s hands was a scroll that he gripped tightly.

Willow ran over to them her face full of hope. “Did you find out anything?” She asked excitedly.

Spike turned and grinned at the ex-watcher. “You did good mate.” The bleach blonde haired vampire said, with more respect in his voice.

Wes nodded and then turned to Willow. “Not only did we find out who put the spell on her and why, but the gentleman was kind enough to give us the scroll to reverse the process. There is a shop near the hospital so I am going to ask Fred.”

“Ask me what?” The petite Texan asked as her and Lindsey walked into the hotel lobby.

“Ok I’ll ask Angel then.” Wes said with a quick grin.

“Uhh Wes man do you think Angel is going to wanna leave Cordy.” Gunn asked.

“Well it will only be for 30 mins or so then we can all go back to the hospital. I mean all Cordy will be doing at the moment is sleeping.” Wes reasoned as he headed towards the telephone.

Xander laughed. “Cordy a mother, that is still a scary thought to me.” And he stopped laughing as soon as he realised most of the room was glaring at him.

Fred walked forward and stood straight in front of him. “Cordy took care of all us, you don’t know her. Leave her alone or you will not be welcome here and if you put her down in anyway I will not be responsible for my actions or there’s.” She indicated to the men behind her.

Spike chuckled but he was jealous, how had the poof managed to find this little group of misfits who now had become his family, who loved and protected each other. He also had a woman who loved him and a child it just wasn’t fair. The vampire turned and looked at Xander and Willow, they weren’t friends they just put up with him, even Buffy and he weren’t friends something had to change but he had no idea what or where to start.

Angel looked down at the woman asleep, his beloved Cordy. So much had happened things in this world had tried to drive them apart but they always seemed to find each other again and that had to mean something, it had to mean that they were meant to be. Even though he didn’t want to leave her if this helped save Buffy, he owed it to his first love and Cordy was still going to be asleep for while, she wouldn’t know that he was even gone, he would be back before she awoke. He bent forwards and gave her a soft kiss on the lips.

“I love you Cordy.” He whispered and turned and left her hospital room the vampire smiled at the people as he walked past and nodded to a nurse pushing a wheelchair.

As soon as the handsome man vanished around the corner, the smile left the nurses face, her eyes hardened as she pushed open the door to one Cordelia Chase.

Willow was walking around the lobby and every 5 seconds she would turn and glare at the door as if that would make Angel get here any quicker, it was so close now and she wanted her friend back.

The door finally opened and in walked the tall, muscular, dark haired vampire carrying a bag gently in his arms. Wes ran to him and took the bag and went straight back to the table which had the scroll spread out.

“I’m going back to the hospital to check on Cordy.” Angel said and as he turned to leave Lindsey walked over and touched him on the shoulder.

“Angel it was Lilah.” He said quietly.

Angel turned and stared at him intensely. “Lilah?” He questioned his voice getting lower and deadlier.

Lindsey nodded. “Wesley and Spike found out when they went and ‘talked’ to the demon who put the spell on Buffy. It seemed that she wanted us both out of the way but because we both love Cordy, in our ways.” Lindsey added hastily as he saw Angel’s eyes narrow dangerously. “She thought she could play us off against each other. You know Lilah she is big on revenge if things don’t go her….” Lindsey’s eyes widened as the same thought came to him and Angel at the same time.

“Cordy!” They said together.

“Gunn your with me. Wes, Fred follow us as soon as you can.” Angel ordered as he, Gunn and Lindsey ran out of the door.

“What’s that all about?” Spike asked.

“Lilah is a real bitch and she could take it out on Cordy, they’re going to the hospital to keep her safe until she can come home.” Wes said as he started placing in the ingredients into a bowl.

Lilah looked down at the unconscious woman, she was attractive, yes, but what made Cordelia Chase special that had men falling at her feet and doing what ever she wanted.

The lawyer reached out and gently almost lovingly pushed a strand of brunette hair of the seers face.

“You will not be so pretty when they find you.” She whispered. “But then it won’t matter to you because you’ll be dead.” Lilah turned and walked away laughing.

Angel ran into the hospital room and all that was there was an empty hospital bed.

“Excuse me where has Miss Chase gone?” A nurse asked.

“Are you sure another nurse didn’t take her.” Angel asked hopefully.

“No I checked before I came here, I was the one to take her temperature, blood pressure and find out if she needed any medication.” The woman asked her voice shaking.

Angel turned to Gunn and Lindsey.

“I need to see a lawyer.” Angel said calmly

Chapter 15

As Angel, Gunn and Lindsey arrived outside Wolfram and Hart they just stood and stared at the tall skyscraper.

“I just wish this all could end.” Gunn muttered.

“It’s amazing how far you can fall without even realising it.” Lindsey said his mind wandering back to all the things that he had done while working for the law firm.

“I know the feeling.” The vampire muttered.

“Angel we are going to get her back, I will do what I have to?” Lindsey said softy.

Gunn watched both men, in this one moment in time they had one thing on their mind. To get Cordy back safe and make anyone who hurt her pay.

“We all will.” Gunn answered for Angel.

Before Angel could reply Gavin Parks, wannabe top gun walked out of the door for the law firm. Angel and Gunn started laughing at the luck of it, Lindsey turned to them his blue eyes in confusion, he then turned back to the man they were watching.

“Who’s that?” Lindsey asked curiously.

“That is Gavin; he wants to be your replacement.” Gunn said still laughing.

Lindsey’s face was suddenly full of disbelief.

“Him,” the ex-lawyer said pointing. “Him, he wants to replace me.” Lindsey scoffed. “Lilah would eat him up.”

“Well that maybe so but Gavin does tend to know a lot that goes on in there. Shall we find out exactly how much?” Angel smirked as they followed him.

Gavin Parks could tell something was wrong, he could feel it but he couldn’t see anything. That was until he was slammed up against a wall and staring into the face of one very upset vampire. Damn you Lilah he thought to himself knowing why Angel was here.

“Gavin, good to see you again. You know what I want, are you actually going to make me ask you?” Angel asked smoothly.

Lindsey walked closer to Gavin and stared at him intently.

“Uhhh Angel wha-t-t-t-t can I-I-I-I do for you?” Gavin stuttered.

Lindsey shook his head in disappointment. “He can’t even fake that he’s not afraid, pathetic, truly pathetic.”

For the first time Gavin looked at the man who spoke, his eyes narrowed, he knew this mans face from somewhere but couldn’t quite figure it out and then it suddenly hit him.
“Lindsey McDonald.”

Lindsey grinned at him his face lighting up and looking boyish. “Yes.”

Gavin looked at him in disgust. “How can you work with him?” He spat out.

“Compared to who I have worked with like hmmm let me think, Lilah. Theses guys are easy to work with, at least I know with them if they want me dead they will come at me head on. You’d better watch your back Gavin if you get in Lilah’s way she will eat you up and spit you out and you’ll have no idea what hit you.” Lindsey heard Angel’s growl. “But we are getting of point here. Where is Cordelia Chase and if you say you don’t know Angel here will cause you a lot of pain, if you haven't read his history he has had a lot of practice and he is very good at it.” His blue eyes twinkled.

Angel raised an eyebrow and tightened his grip on the frightened man.

“Well Gavin” Angel asked.

“Lilah never said anything but she drew a map, I was going to check it out. It’s in my top pocket.” Gavin choked out.

Lindsey reached out and took at the map, and grinned at Angel.

“Let’s go and get our girl.” Angel turned to Lindsey and nodded.

*****

Cordy’s head pounded, her eyelids were heavy and she had to force them open. She tried to move her hands but she couldn’t, her eyes flew open and upon her captor.

“Lilah,” she whispered then a terrible thought hit her. “My baby.”

Lilah laughed. “Don’t worry your snivelling baby is fine.”

“What do you want Lilah?” Cordy asked.

“They all have to pay.” The lawyer told her calmly. “And the one thing that will hurt them all most is your death, but first of all they have to shudder in horror at you. Let’s get rid of that pretty face.” As Lilah lowered the knife towards her, Cordy’s face paled as the glint from the knife flashed in her eyes and she screamed as the point bit into her flesh and caused blood to flow down her cheek.

 

Chapter 16

Cordy screamed and Lilah laughed at the fear on the young woman’s face, this is what the lawyer loved, the power, and the control. Life and death at her fingertips even though Cordelia had no choice, she was going to die. Lilah had a point to prove.

The door buckled at the hinges with the first bang, and the second one sent it flying across the room hitting the wall opposite. Lilah ducked behind the table and looked over to the tied up Cordelia and standing there in the doorway was Angel, his face was vamped out, hate and anger shone through his eyes.

Lilah for the first time since she had known Angel was truly terrified, the fear spread through her body like a tidal wave, she had definitely pushed him too far this time.

Angel ran to Cordy’s side and untied her hands, his whole being was focused on her, that he didn’t see Lilah quietly move away to her desk and pull out a gun, but Lindsey did, before she could fire the weapon Lindsey punched her and knocked her to the ground, he then picked up the gun and smirked at her.

“Stay away from us Lilah, you can’t win, you never will.” He told her honestly.

When the ex-lawyer stood, he turned to see Cordy and Angel watching him both with smiles on their faces.

“Let’s go, I want to see my baby.” Cordy told them one hand was clutched tightly in Angel’s and the other one she held out to Lindsey.

*****

Buffy sat on one of the sofa’s in the lobby her head buried in her hands, the memories of what she had done and what she had been forced to do kept repeating in her mind over and over again, how she had tried to kill Angel and Cordy, the loneliness and anger at the thought of them being able to have a life together to have a family. She just hoped that the two of them could forgive her, she had to let go and move on and accept what had happened to her, yes she died but she was back again now and she was going have to talk over her feelings and her memories of where she had been. That was going to be the hardest telling them they had taken her from heaven, that she had finally been at peace and they had dragged her back to the hell of her life, the constant battles.

Fred paced around the room, with baby Connor in her arms trying to settle him down, her heart in her throat the waiting becoming almost unbearable. She spun around quickly as she heard the lobby door swing open, Connor giggled in her arms. The petit Texan’s face lit up as she saw Cordy, Angel, Lindsey and the newborn baby standing in the doorway.

Xander and Willow reached over and touched Buffy’s shoulder, showing their support, letting her know that they were there to help her no matter what.

Buffy stood up and walked over to Cordy and Angel.

“I’m sorry for everything Angel, Cordelia. When I came back I was so lost, I just wanted for things to go back to how they used to be. I know that is no excuse but I…” Buffy stuttered not knowing how to express what she was feeling.

“It’s ok Buffy, you have friends that are here to help you, let them back in.” Cordy said as she nodded towards Xander and Willow.

“Well as fun as this has been I think it’s time to head back to home, we have vampires to dust and monsters to fight and a teenage girl to keep an eye on.” Xander quipped; he just wanted to forget all about this, he actually was missing home.

Angel, Cordy and Lindsey moved away from the door to let them past. Buffy stopped in front of Angel and stared up into his handsome face.

“I am sorry for everything Angel, but just so you know I do still love you and if you ever realise that you love me let me know, I might be available.” Buffy whispered.

“I’m sorry Buffy but I love Cordy, I love her so much. You have to let me go; you have to let what we had go. There is someone out there for you and you can’t let them be second to a young girl’s dream. I had to let you go, I had to let someone in.” Angel stopped and he looked and smiled at Cordelia. “Actually I don’t think I had a chance, she was someone who just wouldn’t take no for an answer.”

Buffy felt her heartbreak she had truly lost him, but he was right she had to let him go but had no idea how to do it. The tears fell from her eyes as she looked at him one more time, his face full of love for the woman who had stolen his heart and he wasn’t looking at her. Without another word the three school friends walked out of the door.

Angel reached out his arm and pulled Cordy to him, he kissed the top of her head and stared at his family his son Connor, Fred, Wes, Gunn, Cordy, Lindsey and there daughter. He was truly happy.

*****

6 months had passed and it had gone without incident, they still had Cordy’s visions, they saved the innocents and fought various demons and vampires, but they were happy and had settled in their life together and the changes that had happened. Angel and Cordelia’s love had grown deeper with each day and it had grown stronger. Lindsey had now become one of the family he had proved himself time and time again and he and Fred had started a relationship, it was still new but it was getting stronger. The two babies were growing up healthy and spoilt by parents, Aunt and Uncles.

*****

Lilah growled at the pictures that lay across her desk pictures of all of them laughing, pictures of Gunn and Wesley talking, of Lindsey and Fred, of Angel and Cordy. You could see the love in every single one of them, she swiped her hand across the desk the pictures flew into the air and fluttered to the ground anger flooding her very being.

“Something has to be done.” She muttered rising from her chair and storming out of her office, the door slamming closed behind her.

*****

Lindsey and Cordelia were down in the lobby filing some paperwork, Wesley was in the office researching, Gunn and Fred were out getting Tacos for dinner and Angel was upstairs keeping an eye on the kids, the vampire just loved to sit there and watch them.

Lilah opened the door of the Hyperion hotel and stared at the two people in the lobby laughing. Cordelia was facing the other way sorting out some files, the lawyers eyes narrowed at the woman whom she blamed. Lilah raised her hand, a gun gripped tightly as she aimed at the brunette.

Lindsey turned and saw Lilah, his face turned white and everything seemed to go in slow motion.

“NOOOOOOO” he screamed as he rushed forward just as the bullet exploded from the gun.

Lindsey dived forward and felt the bullet invade his body, the pain exploded inside of him as he fell to the ground.

“LINDSEY!!!” Cordy screamed.

Wes ran out of the office crossbow in hand, and as he saw Lilah about to fire again he instinctively pulled the trigger and released the arrow. Lilah collapsed to the ground as the arrow entered her chest; she coughed up blood as everything started to fade.

Angel ran down into the lobby and saw Cordy cradling Lindsey’s head in her lap, Lilah was on the ground her eyes open but not focusing as the blood pooled around her body and Wes stood their with his weapon still in his hand.

“You can’t die, you can’t I won’t let you.” Cordy sobbed.

Fred and Gunn walked in laughing but stopped as they saw Lilah’s body.

“NO” Fred cried dropping the food and running to her boyfriends side.

“You and Angel take care of the kids ok, take care of each other.” His gaze turned to Fred. “I love you; I’ve never loved anyone like this.” He coughed and blood fell from his mouth. “Thank you all for being my family.” He gulped trying to get air into his lungs.

Fred laid her head on his chest and listened as his heart stopped beating, the tears fell from her eyes and landed on his chest wishing that her love for him, her tears and her own heartbeat would bring him back.

Wesley put the crossbow on the table and pulled Fred into his arms as she sobbed uncontrollably, Angel wrapped his arms around Cordy.

*****

Cordy stood at the door and watched Fred rock her daughter gently whispering to her, Angel came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist.

“Hey little Lindsey, I’m going to tell you all about your daddy.” Fred whispered.

It had been a hard few months since the death of Lindsey but they were sticking together and slowly rebuilding things but they still had a long journey to make, another person had died fighting this fight. Just like Angel, Lindsey was on the wrong side but he changed and fought the good fight and in the end his life was the price he paid.

THE END