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The Silent Urge Series by Part B Cravings
Part One ~ New Beginning ~ Xander ~ God! What was I thinking! Kissing
Spike! God. Gah. And he doesn’t want me. He just ignored me when I leaned over
to him, when his face was so near to mine… GAH! Something is seriously wrong
because I can’t be turned on by Spike if he isn’t by me! So I admit it, I can
be attracted to Spike, if he is attracted to me. He made it clear he isn’t, so
I am not attracted to him. Him, another male, a male vampire and here we go
again: vampire boyfriend – boyfriend vampire: please choose your favorite! Where are we going anyway? I look
out of the car window; try to get a clue to where we’re driving to. Ah, the old
warehouse district by the docks. The buildings here are all abandoned and
mostly in a bad shape. Some look like they could come crashing down any minute
now. Of course we stop directly in front of one of the worst ones. I swore to myself not to expect too
much. Nevertheless I am a little disappointed. He clearly isn’t the prince with
the big castle. He kills the engine and looks
intently in my eyes. “Ready?” He asks with a slight
smirk on his sensual lips. “As ready as I will ever be.” His
smirk turns into a smile and I just have to smile back. He looks so young when
he loses the Big Bad shield he built for himself. Wish he could be so careless,
so free every time he is only with me. Nope, won’t share the ‘young Spike’
with anybody. “’K, whelp. Keep close behind me.
Don’t react to anything that’s said to you or said to me about you. You can ask
me everything when we're alone. Understood?” “Yes Master!” I joke. For a fraction of a second Spike’s
eyes glaze over then he chuckles. “What?” I stammer a little thrown
by the dilated eyes. Wow. “You’ll see.” And we are back to
the smirking vampire, I like his sudden mood changes, it’ll never be boring to
be with him. He jumps out of the car and
rummages in his duster pockets. Finally he produces a heavy collection of keys.
The metal of them bangs together when he throws them at me, makes a too loud
sound in the dark night. I catch the keys and freeze. It’s like a disguise was around the
building, now I look up to a large four storey building in good condition,
lights shine through windows, a sparkling plate says: ‘Twilight’ in eerie
lilac. Light music is drifting out, something with a good beat I don’t
recognize. No wonder we weren’t aware of this
club if humans can’t see it. He guides me through the door and I
see two guards –demons!- running towards us. I am dead. Spike just sold me to
some demons. And I am going to die. Oh god! I am so stupid. Why did I trust
Spike? Swallowing hard against the bitter taste of betrayal. “Human!” One of the big ugly things
hisses and grabs my arm. Before I can blink, Spike spins around, snarls:
“Mine!” and tears its head off his body. Whoa! Possessive much? At least this ugly demon can’t buy
me anymore. The other demon throws himself to
Spikes feet, bowing down until its… erm face touches the floor. “Clean this off!” Spike barks at
the shell-shocked demon. “And spread the word: the boy is mine! Whoever touches
him is dead.” His arm snakes around my waist and he leads me further down the
hall to a door with an ‘Office’-sign. It opens before we can reach it. A man –demon!- stands in the door
jab, looking at me with narrow eyes that only after a second flicker over to
Spike. The man jumps towards us and Spike lets go of me. Yeah, show this bastard
that attacking us is not a good idea! I am stunned when Spike catches
this demon that squeezes his long muscled legs around the vampire’s waist. “God, baby, you came back to me!”
They should get a room, looks like this demon wants to mate with Spike. Rubbing
his crotch against Spike’s and drooling all over his face – slut. I see him
trying to kiss Spike but my vampire turns his head away. A winning smile
settles on my lips when this demon gazes at me with flashing orange eyes. Spike sets him down and orange eyes
turns around sharply and goes into the office. Spike holds his hand out and I
grab it a little too hard. His smirk grows and I have the urge to smack it
right out off his pretty face. ~ Spike ~ Isn’t he bloody marvellous? All
jealous he is. So bloody cute when he gets these sparks in his eyes. ~ Xander ~ Spike pulls me into the office and
I sit down on a big black leather recliner while he sprawls on another. This
demon guy sits on the edge of the black polished desk, impertinently placing
his crotch at eye level. Even if his legs are long and muscled and look pretty
good in black not-too-tight leather, he doesn’t need to present himself like
some “eat-all-you-can-for-free”. “Welcome to the Twilight, kid.” He
sneers and I so hate him for the ‘kid’! I glimpse over at Spike and he also
doesn’t look amused. “Treckle, Xander. Xander, Treckle.”
He introduces us, voice very flat. “Listen, kid, this club is for
every demon to come here and enjoy itself. It’s absolutely necessary that it's
kept secret from humans, especially from the Slayer and the Initiative. We don’t
have many problems here. Violence and fighting are no more common here than in
human only clubs, but staying mainly within the realm of a lovers spat, or a
drunken row.“ Pausing dramatically and leaning back on his arms, squaring his
shoulders, thrusting his hips into a more comfortable position. I am fixed on the
slice of skin I can see where the dark blue t-shirt rode up an inch. ~ Spike ~ I have to stop that. Treckle is
bloody playing him. Know he's fucking gorgeous, don’t need a reminder. Don’t
want Xander to drool all over him… Aargh. He stares at the little bit of
exposed skin, watching a single abdominal muscle clench, licking his lips
unconsciously… god! Can you please stop masturbating with your eyes as long as
you don’t look at me? Wanker! Treckle is now looking at me,
smirking like the devil himself would, if he would think he just got my Pet hot
and bothered. Well Xander is not my Pet, so I don’t care for whom he gets hard.
No, don’t care. I light a cig as casual as I can with hands trembling with
anger. ~ Xander ~ My gaze slides down to the front of
Treckle’s leather pants. Is there a bulge? Oh yeah and… it’s twitching! Oh God.
The bulge twitched. And there is an answering twitch in my jeans. I am getting
hard while I stare at another male getting hard! Why is it so silent? Why
aren’t they talking? I look up and Treck smiles at me with gleaming orange
eyes, lips parted, tip of a light blue tongue showing. Frantically I turn to Spike. Yellow
eyes and gritted teeth. Uh oh. He is glaring at Treck. My hard-on
goes as fast as it came. Spike is upset cause I am flirting with another male
demon. “You through with him?” Spike spits. “Not even begun… “ Treck retorts
and leers at me. I see Spike clench his fist in an attempt to pull himself
together. “I’ll show him the apartment, we’ll
come down later.” He jumps to his feet and walks out. I follow him as fast as I
can. When I walk very fast through the door I hear Treckle mumble: “Spike's
mine, kid!” I break into a run. Part Two ~ Home ~ Xander ~ I catch up with Spike by the end of
the hall. His whole body is tense. There is a narrow stairway and he shoves me
roughly to go first. I hear someone running towards us
and stop to turn around. I fear it is Treckle, trying to do
another thing to disturb Spike and my vulnerable relationship. What I see is a
demon, not taller than 4 feet. It’s kinda cute with its little yellow horns all
over its forehead. It throws itself on his belly on the floor to Spike’s feet.
Whoa. “Master Spike, I am so excited…” I
groan. Master Spike?! Spike chuckles and I am so happy he
isn’t too angry with me about the flirting thingie. “Go, bring up my things out of the
Desoto!” My vampire demands with an authority I never heard before. This is
really his world. I am stuck between unreasonably
proud and slightly threatened. Spike ushers me up the stairs and I
have to stop in front of a closed door. Again Spike reaches into his duster
pocket and produces a key. He hands it to me and I unlock the door, push it
open. The first short glimpse inside and
my jaw drops nearly to the floor. gasp Wow! “Go in.” Spike says a little more
warmly, pleased by my stunned surprise. So I make a step forward and try to
enter the apartment but an invisible barrier stops me. I frown. Spike goes past me into the
apartment. There is no barrier holding him. “Turned tables. How do you like it,
human?” He snarls with venom nearly choking me. I swallow hard. It’s like this for Spike? Seeing
all the good things, wanting to enter the shiny world of another’s life but not
being able to? It’s fucking degrading. Humiliating. And it makes your insides
yearn for something you can never have. ~ Spike ~ Yeah whelp, not nice to be on the
other side, is it? Doesn’t feel good to see all the
things you want to have this near but can’t go grab them, does it? He looks like he is going to cry. I think he got my point. “This is my safe place. Nobody is
allowed to enter here without me giving an allowance to him, her or it.
Whatever.” The boy nods. “Until now, only Treck was allowed
to enter. I’ll revoke his invitation.” I whisper the few words in Glesha which
are necessary for the invalidation. “I want you to feel safe here too.
This'll be your home if you want it to be. If you're interested in Treckle
it can’t be yours. You'll have to ask him if he’ll take you in. He’ll sure like
that.” Yeah, I can picture it clearly. Treckle would fuck him into unconsciousness
all the time and throw him away when he's bored with the toy boy. Oh see, whelp is frantically
shaking his head. “I don’t want to stay with him, I
want you… to stay with me, you know?” Oh what a nice blush and a Freudian slip.
Gotta love this human. I look into his eyes – wet earth
drying in golden sunbeams – trying to find sincerity in them. He holds my gaze
without any sign that he may be lying. ~ Xander ~ Spike and I locked gazes some
moments ago. It’s very intense. Feels like he's searching through my soul for
confirmation. I really want to stay with Spike. I was just distracted by this
Treckle creature. Eventually Spike shrugs and starts to whisper again some
words in a language I don’t recognize. My body lurches forward and if
Spike hadn’t anticipated my lack of reaction, I would’ve had to pick myself off
the floor now. The skin tingles warmly where his hand closed around my biceps
to keep me from falling. Mhmm. Regaining my stance I get the first
good look of the apartment. Wow. It’s a huge loft. The whole left side is open and the
three sections, living room, library/training room and dining room/kitchen are
divided only by black wooden beams. I take in the decorations on the
left side, a big living area with two huge black leather sofas and some
impressive music-equipment including the biggest TV I have ever seen. The bookcases covering the wall and
the three club chairs around a big round table are the library, while the big
training section is mostly acknowledgeable by the fifteen by fifteen feet
training mat dominating the space in the middle of the apartment. The dining room has an old dark
wooden table with eight chairs seated around it and the kitchen including an aisle
in the middle is in the same shade of dark old looking wood. On the right side of the loft are
two big rooms with another smaller one between them. “Your room,” Spike points to the
open door nearest me. “Bathroom,” the middle door. “My room.” The door farthest
from the entry. I nod stunned by the overwhelming luxury pouring out of every
single detail of the loft. “I love wide open places but I like
privacy, so I asked for two separated room with walls and ceilings. You're not
allowed to lock your door. I will not lock my door either. Bathroom can be
locked though.” He pauses and then shoves me over to said room. I look in the bathroom; it’s all
black tiles and silver fittings. A big triangular tub in one corner, a walk-in
shower, a toilet and a bidet, a wide vanity cabinet with two wash basins and a
huge mirror. “That is the only one.” Spike
points to the mirror only my reflection is visible in and I know it's another
rule. No more mirrors than this one in the apartment. Alright with me, don’t
like to see me anyway. “Want to see your room?” I nod
excited and feel dumb for it. I am so fucking needy. ~ Spike ~ Boy’s lookin’ like Santa surprised
him in the middle of the year with presents. Got this overwhelmed teary
expression on his face and I don’t think he can take more generosity at this
moment. Try to be as casual as I can be about this apartment, don’t want him to
feel obliged to repay it in any way. Know the boy has potential and I'm really
curious as to what he can grow into if he got enough support to risk
development. I push open the door to his room.
And he gasps and I have to agree with him, the lack of furniture is disturbing
and hostile. I have to have a ‘talk’ with Treckle. grumble ~ Xander ~ Spike shoves open the door and I
just have to gasp! Wow, this is the biggest, lightest and cleanest space I ever
had to myself! The big four poster bed with the mahogany frame, a mahogany desk
with a dark green armchair and a big mahogany wardrobe are the only furniture
in the room – my room. I am so thankful that the room is not decorated
completely. I can get things for myself, arrange it how I want it to be, like I
need it to be to fit with me. Grinning I turn to Spike to thank him. I see Spike’s jaw clench. Oh. Looks
like he does not agree with the room. “I am sorry. I thought Treckle
would take more care of the decoration to make it at least a little bit
comfortable.” He looks at me apologetic. Huh? “Erm, … Spike, this is alright,
it’s very much more I ever dreamed of, … honestly this is the best I ever got
to myself…” ~ Spike ~ He looks down ashamed and I have to
suppress a growl. Who allows some people to have kids? I have to fight against
the overwhelming urge to go back to his parents’ house NOW and tear them apart.
Both. Mom and Dad. She could have at least shown him she loved him if she
wasn’t able to protect him. “We’ll have to go down again before
the busiest hours begin; I’ll show you the club, the bar. You’ll get some
introductions to people and rules. You can start bartending tomorrow, you’ll be
able to buy whatever you like for your room soon.” ~ Xander ~ Bar? Bartending? That’s what I'm
doing here? No ‘not the nice kind’ job for me? Just plain bartending? Oh god, I
am so relieved! I could hug and kiss Spike. Repeatedly. “Bartending?” I squeak joyfully. “Yeah, pet, something wrong with
that?” Smirking bastard! “No! Nothing! Alright! Me
bartending! Bartending good! Of the very good!” ~ Spike ~ Gotta love this innocence. This
ability to be enthusiastic about the littlest things. “Thought so, mate. Come on then.” Going by instinct I grab his hand and
drag the bouncing youth with me. Could get used to this. Part Three ~ Rules
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~ Xander ~ I am holding another man’s hand. I
am holding a male vampire’s hand. (swallow) However graceful and cool it may be
when Spike comes down the stairs, I definitely destroy that look with the happy
bouncing behind him. Look cool vampire in black leather
duster / head of a young brunette poking over his shoulder / cool vampire in
black leather duster / head of a young brunette grinning madly poking over his
shoulder / … I can’t help it. And Spike must be
pretty used to a mad person being around him. After all he was with Drusilla
for nearly a century. That girl was nuts. Oh and here we go again: “Office”. ~ Spike ~ I feel Xander tense when we enter
the office again. At least he's not looking forward to seeing Treckle again.
Or it’s just that he's embarrassed by his reaction to the demon and has to
deal with the issues of his sexuality first. Nevertheless he knows what he
loses if he gets involved with him. Question is, will the apartment be enough
for him to not want to lose it. Letting go of Xander’s hand, I push
him down on one of the chairs. Treckle stands in front of one window and stares
into the night. He makes no move or noise to acknowledge us. Again I have to
adore the beauty he has. The black leather pants are tight against the firm
round buttocks, the waist small and just inviting to grab it hard. His
shoulders are broad for his size, extremely when he crosses his arms in front
of his chest like right know. I block my mind against a whirlwind
of memories which try to assault me and break the silence: “You alright, luv?”
I bite my lip hard, angry at myself that the familiar endearment escaped my
mouth. As I nearly expected Treckle turns around with a blinding smile: “Yeah
baby, I was waiting for you… both.” He got me. Fine. ~ Xander ~ If this isn’t unresolved sexual
energy… gotta go gotta go gotta … “So, kid” Treckle drawls overly
friendly and sits down behind his desk. Thank god! “Let me get this out in one long
speech. You can ask me later all you want to know. ‘K?” His eyes are gleaming
orange and he flashes them for my benefit. Really impressive this trick. Cool.
I nod to his question. “As I said the bar is not much
different from a human bar. The customers are demons mostly.” D’uh! “They come
to us to have a decent drink or to enjoy their time. Human patrons are not
allowed into the main dance area. However there are human employees. We don’t
like problems so we’ve got very good security. We have our own patrol out in
this part of the city to keep the slayer and the Initiative away.” It obviously worked. “We’re open from sunset to dawn
everyday except Monday. You will tend on the Big Bar until you know all the
drinks and specials. Rasplar, a W’kara demon and Maerg, a Gulsh will introduce
you to everything necessary. You’ll have to learn some words in different demon
languages to communicate with the guests probably on your own.” Can’t do that. You’re dumb! Dumb
like shit! “When you're good enough, you can
take shifts on the second bar alone, if you prove yourself capable you can get
the bar to yourself.” Never be able to achieve the
abilities needed for that. You can’t do anything on your own! You can’t even
piss without help! “Spike and I agreed to give you
free meals, free rent in exchange for your work, you can keep all the tips
though. Our customers are very generous when they're content with the
service.” You can’t do anything right, can
you? “You - like all the other staff
members will have a direct link to the security by magic. If you feel
uncomfortable or are threatened you call, the security will make the guest
leave. The guests know that and they mostly choose to respect that.” Why should I respect your
privacy? All you are, all you have, I gave to you! You don’t deserve respect! “You have to be very careful with
the drinks. Keep the ingredients schedule, don’t mix by yourself or change even
the slightest thing because something is missing. If you're not sure do not
tamper with the recipe. If you're not sure about an ingredient, or can’t find
it, ask Rasplar or Maerg!” Stop asking these dumb questions!
Can’t you see I am watching TV? Why would you need to know how to tie shoes?
You’ve got Velcro! “What is delicious to one can be
deadly to another. If you're interested in a guest for more than business
relations, you have to talk to me or Spike first before you take any step in
that direction. There are really cute demons out there and the vamps aren’t
that bad but some of them can hurt you without wanting to. There is for example
the Haricca demon whose semen is toxic to humans.” Huh? Toxic semen? One swallow and
good bye Xand-man. Whoa. Good to know. Gah! What? Did I really think about
swallowing demon seed? Not Spike seed – demon seed of a demon I don’t even
know?! I wouldn’t do that to a demon I don’t know? Right. Would never do that
to a demon. Nope. “Anything I have forgotten? Hmm.
Ah! Never more than two different colours on you. And try to think about less…
blinding colours.” Spike starts to chuckle and Treckle joins in. This must be
delicious for him, for Spike, for both of them. grrr ~ Spike ~ Didn’t know, Xander could growl. “Come on pet, let’s have a look at
the club, huh?” And there it is again the beautiful
light in my boy’s eyes. The sparkles he gets in the chocolate orbs when he's
excited about something remind me of the golden flakes dancing in my sire's
eyes just before he entered me, filled me. Fuck, how do you hide a bloody
hard-on that size without a duster? Think about something, something bad! A
bloody Xander. Hm, lick it all off him… So does not help! The slayer bitch.
That bint hurting my Xanpet! Oh… this is working a bit too good. Huh.
Embarrassing. ~ Xander ~ Showmetheclub…showmetheclub…showmetheclub… Without another look back at
Treckle we both leave the office and Spike guides me through a big double door
into… total darkness. Stumble… ahrg… oops… erm… “Spike?” “Right here, pet. Forgot for a
moment you don’t have the superior senses add-on.” Smirk. And I could see that.
Adjusting to the darkness now and I can see. A huge club, dance floor
surrounded by a big black bar that in turn surrounds a spiral staircase. An
outer ring is created by places where small groups can sit and talk. In one
corner is a small stage, not too big for a single act but big enough to
accommodate a band without too much dancing performance. “Oz would love this.” I say awed. “Actually he does love it.” Smirk.
Challenging gaze. “Oz was here? The Dingoes played
here?” “Not the Dingoes, only Oz and a
very stoned ~ Spike ~ Oh yeah, I still think about the
redhead. How he had to concentrate on just holding his guitar while Dev
rubbed himself against his ass, singing slurping lyrics just loud enough for
the audience into the wolf’s ear like a lover would whisper: Fuck me baby, just a little harder… groan ... oops have to pay attention to nummy ... “… and he's still alive? If Willow knew that he was in this club, he would
be dead!” “Oz belongs here, pet. He's a shadow just like me. Willow doesn’t and
he knows that.” And I don’t think Red would have
appreciated another man making her boyfriend come in his pants just by biting his neck hard in front of the whole club. moan ... Think about the slayer… the slayer hurting Xander… ~ Xander ~ Spike looks kinda spaced out
tonight. (wonder) I hope Oz will play here again. I'd really like to see him again sometime. He said a lot without saying
anything at all and isn’t that frightening?! We go over to the bar now and there
are two… obviously demons waiting for us. They pause for some moments with
whatever they do and give me the once over. Urgh. Mom touching my newly cut hair.
“You’re a pretty boy…” “You think he's pretty?” laughinglaughinglaughing
“Shit is prettier than him! The fucking neighbours’ dog’s ass is prettier than
that!” I smile shyly at both and I think the toothy thing and the lip curling
they do ...might have been them smiling back. Part Four ~ Anticipation ~ Spike ~ Silly kid’s nervous ‘cause of these
two demons he would kill without hesitating if he met them in a cemetery.
(snort) I order a pint of O pos and watch Maerg and Raspla overwhelm him with
all sorts of alcohol and ingredients. My nummy has his eyes open wide, looking
frantically from one barkeeper to the other, nodding at the rapidly changing
things they show him. I have no idea how fast he will get into all this. Hope
he’ll find his place here. He hadn’t one outside with the slayer, that’s for
sure. ~ Xander ~ Godgodgod… yes, Vodka, I know,
Gertroff or whatever no, but nodding okay at first, can ask later, Spike is
watching and, JD under there, right, lemons in there, ice cubes not mixy with
that green slimy stuff, okay, Spike watching!, making me NERVOUS!, can’t think
straight! Is this how you feel when your parents love you and they want to
see the school play – no, they already love you, you don’t have to prove your
worth to them anymore, right? Nope, I don’t have an idea what that red glowing
liquid is, that Maerg holds in his 5th hand but I nod and I
understand it explodes, when you put cola into it. Right. I can do this! IF
SPIKE JUST WOULD STOP STARING! GAH! ~ Spike ~ Looks like he himself will explode
in a minute or so. Think I'll rescue him. A look to the clock above the bar:
3:12 a.m. Time to get the human into bed. He has a long day tomorrow. And I
could visit Treckle before sun up… “Right then, Maerg, Raspla thanks
so far. I’ll bring him down tomorrow night at 9.” I grab a red faced Xander and drag
him with me to the exit. I know his eyes have adjusted to the darkness but it’s
good to feel some warm flesh against my skin. In my time with the scoobies I
missed the physical contact most. No one touched me. No handshake, no
high-five, no handholding, no anything. Existing without the proof of being
physically there – it would kill me. Don’t know how a ghost can exist that
long. I would just die without the caress of another individual. When Dru… My
Dru… “Earth to Spike! Hello Blondie!” “Wot?” I bark and realize we are
standing in front of the narrow stairway and I have to let go of the whelp so
we can climb up. Alright. ~ Xander ~ When we are in the apartment, Spike
says something about food in the kitchen and yes, I discover a frozen pizza
there. We take turns showering while the pizza heats up and I have to gulp down
the moans I nearly made when Spike comes out of the bathroom only in black
jeans, top button open. GAH! I sit on one of the barstools, so I
can keep an eye on the pizza, only I'm really keeping an eye on Spikes back.
Following the trail of water droplets as they follow the line of his muscles,
from his hairline to the waistband of his jeans. He leans up against the
counter, waiting on his blood to heat. When Spike leans over to check the cup
in the microwave I nearly moan. He has to be wiggling like that on
purpose! ~ Spike ~ If these aren’t endorphins in the
air, flooding the apartment… A little hip roll while I look at
the pizza and decide it does not need more time and I could detect a hitch in
his breath and a little skip in the heart frequency. Who's the big bad master of
seduction, heh? I hand him the plate with the pizza,
smirking. And he looks at me with a mix of amusement and tortured hopelessness. I take my mug of blood out of the
microwave and Nummy stares at it, when I sit down. “Where do you get human?” he asks,
firm but without accusation. I swallow hard. How does he know
it’s human? ~ Xander ~ Erm, how do I know it’s human? “We kind of produce it, pet.” Spike
finally says and I would have laughed because of the look on his face if we
weren’t talking about human blood. “Produce it?? As in we kidnap
people and milk them??” “How would that be possible without
the slayer knowing about it?” And Spike laughs out loud at the ridiculous picture.
“It’s not like we have a factory where the people are bound to an assembly line
and robots connect hoses to their veins and take their blood!” “So what, they come deliberately?” Suddenly Spike gets serious again.
“Yes, they come of their own free will and they give us one or two pints every
month. It’s like the Red Cross, we just pay better. So, they are not harmed,
they get money, we have a fresh supply and don’t have to go out hunting. No
hunting – no problems with Slutty.” “We?” “Some bouncers are vamps and a lot
of our guests too. We sell it to them.” “That’s a great solution.” “Don’t patronize yourself, Harris.
The vamps buy only a snack here or there, like vodka with a little A plus. They
don’t stop eating people.” “Right, but that’s Slutty’s prob
then.” And did I really just say Slutty instead Buffy? The way Spike smirks I
must have. “Erm, how much do you pay them?”
Keep the innocent face. “20 $ for the pint. free entry and
drinks.” “Couldn’t I…” do that too? “NO!” Whoa. That was loud. “But 20 $...” “I said NO.” Spike growls
dangerously. I pout. I need money and I could… “I’ll give you 100 $ every month if
you never think about that.” 100 $? I grin at Spike. “Deal.” Spike smiles. “So, wanna see my room?” “Yeah.” I smile and Spike smiles back. God, he's so cute when he smiles
the real smiles. We go to the room. He opens the door and walks in. I stand in
the doorway and feel silly. I'm nervous like a schoolgirl on her first date.
Why? He just wants to show me his room.
I feel myself blushing. God, this is so embarrassing. Now he's smirking again. “I just asked you to come into my
bedROOM, not into my bed, Harris.” He laughs and I feel stupid. I am a little
disappointed, hurt by his words. Why by any means would he want me, the
zeppo, the donut boy, in his bed? ~ Spike ~ And there he goes again. Jumping
right into the self doubts. “Yet.” “Huh?” Confused is a look I like on
his face, it’s near the losing-control expression… ~ Xander ~ In one long step he's in front of
me, invades my personal space, one cool hand cups my cheek and makes me look
into his face. I peer through my long hair into his blue eyes. They are darker
than usual. A deep rich blue. His lips are less than two inches from mine and I
feel his breath ghost over my mouth when he speaks: “I said, I only asked you to come
into my bedroom now,” He licks his lips and I have to gather all my will
together not to catch that pink wet tip between my teeth. “not to come into my
bed yet.” My stomach makes little flip-flops when he sways a little nearer to
me, his gaze flickers from eyes to lips, from lips to eyes … “But when I think about it…” he
whispers and I close my eyes against the spinning room. “now is good too.” I can feel the
coolness of his skin against my mouth, so close are his lips to mine. I am
unable to think about anything other than: kissmekissmekissme. Any moment now I’ll feel his lips
on mine. His mouth devouring mine. God yes! Part Five ~ Scents I ~ Spike ~ There's a loud knock on the door
and the whelp jumps away from me! Argh! Grrr. I am instantly dressed up and as
fast as I can at the door, ripping it open with such force, the hinges squeal.
“Wot?” I bark, angry that I didn’t get my kiss. The two Liplarsh demons tremble
in fear and are holding our stuff in front of them like a shield. “M-m-master Treckle sent us to
b-b-bring your luggage, Master Sp-spike. We d-d-didn’t meant to b-bother you.”
I clench my fist to calm myself down. Wouldn’t do me good to tear the service
staff apart, would it? “Alright. Just leave it outside.”
Hope the whelp sees how serious I am with the barrier. I look at him, still standing in
the door jamb to my bedroom, a light smile on the face and ‘confusion’ in block
letters written on his forehead. That’s how I … what the hell? “Xander… “I call but it’s too late,
he already turned to look in the room. Bloody hell. ~ Xander ~ When I am sure Spike will not kill
the room service, I turn around to take a look in Spike’s room. --- --- T-the bed has an iron frame instead
of wood, vampire friendly and the black sheets are decorated with blood red
rose petals. There is a desk on which an
impressive rose bouquet sits. A bottle of very expensive wine and
imported chocolate are waiting on the bedside table. Candles in elegantly formed iron
holders are positioned on every surface. I wonder quickly if the books in
the bookcase were selected by Spike or if they are leftovers from the former
owner of the apartment. The room looks as if it’s decorated
for a romantic event for two. And I know for sure I am not one of the
participants. Suddenly I feel Spike behind me. He takes in the preparations of his
room and sighs exaggeratedly. “We have to talk.” He says and I
shake my head. I don’t want to know. “Xander…” A tickling on the base of
my spine when he says my name like that. “No Spike. You’ve got a life, erm,
unlife here and it’s okay. I thank you for everything you do for me; I won’t
bother you if you let me stay. I don’t want to go but if my presence interferes
with your unlife I will be gone. Just say the word. The good-bye words I mean.
You and Treck… you fit together very nicely from what I could see and he cares
about you… a lot.” Vague gesture with my hand around the bedroom in general. I
know I'm babbling but I can’t stop. I'm so disappointed but I can’t get a
grip why exactly. Okay, I thought I was something special, that Spike cared
about me. And now I feel like the fifth wheel. Expendable Xander that’s me. ~ Spike ~ Up and down and up and down. His
self worth must get sick. It’s trapped in a bleeding rollercoaster. It changes
faster than bloody Angelus’ mood! “If you don’t want me here, I’ll
go…. No problemo. I have a few dollars saved, I can make it. I don’t want to
embarrass you with me being human and always in the way. … Okay, I’ll get my
stuff. It’s still outside, hm? Don’t worry about me… “Coughing that sounds more
like a sob. “Don’t worry about me telling anybody about the club or where you
are. The secret is safe with me… “ ~ Xander ~ I turn around to look into Spike’s
face because he hasn’t reacted to my speech. He has his arms crossed in front
of his chest; blue eyes look at me expectantly. I frown. I am not sure what he
is waiting for. “What?” I want to yell annoyed but
all I can manage is a hoarse whisper. “You through?” He asks me coldly. I nod. “Good, because we need to talk.” I
roll my eyes. “Didn’t you hear anything I just
said?” “I heard every word.” “So we can move to the part with
the good-byes now, yes?” “No.” “But…” “No. We will sit down now and
discuss a few things like normal grown ups.” We roll our eyes in unison. A
vampire and a youth – normal grown ups. Yeah. His voice is low and commanding
now. “I am not your fucking parents who
either ignore you or hit you and I am not your bloody righteous scoobies who either
ignore you or use you. Try to get that into your head!” His eyes are full of
golden stars, they're burning into mine. He's beautiful when he's not
whining about the damn chip or pig’s blood, when he's in control and
determined to get his will. I feel the dreamy smile crawling up my face. ~ Spike ~ And up again. “You silly git!” I snort and poke
him in the shoulder. “Now come, sit down with me!” We go into the kitchen, where I
heat another bag blood. I have to get back to my old strength. For Harris I
have a little surprise. I grab a container of chocolate chip ice cream and
shove it into his hands. “Oh Spike! You really care!” He
grabs a spoon and starts to … devour it, would be a good word for what he
does with the … urgh. Why did I give him a … that’s a long tongue he has,
wonder how… (moan) the spoon – all the way into his mouth – lips firmly shaping
the ice cream before entering the warm wet cave… “Do you have a favourite?” Huh? Me?
Icecream? ~ Xander ~ Icecream is good. Soooo goood. All cool
and melting on my tongue. The microwave dings and Spike takes out his blood but
doesn’t drink it, instead stares at me… I can smell the blood; it’s another
blood type than the one a while ago. I wonder if he prefers one? “Do you have a favourite?” Pulling
the spoon out of my mouth with a wet plop. “Not so into icecream.” “Icecream?” “Yeah, favourite ice cream?” Raised
eyebrow. “Na, asked you about your favourite
blood! It’s not the same type as before, still human though and I wondered…” I
trail off when Spike stares at me open mouthed. “You smell the different blood
types?” “Erm yes.” “Why?” “Erm… no idea?” “Did this ever occur before?” “Not so often around people who
heat blood and have it for dinner.” “So you’re often around people who
only heat blood then?” Spikesmirk. “Fuck no.” Hurt look. “You know
what I mean!” I grin as goofily as I can. “So what about your favourite now?” “Before was AB pos, now is O pos. I
prefer the neg’s. They’re rare, only about 15 per cent of people have it.” “I'm B neg.” “I know.” Dark blue eyes looking at
me, penetrating my being, cut me to the core of my soul. I shudder involuntarily. When he raises the mug to his lips
I see him struggling to keep the human front. “Let go, it doesn’t bother me.” Oh,
sheepish Spike. Didn’t know he could do sheepish. I already admitted he's
cute, didn’t I? Relief follows and after the first careful sip his eyes are
golden blissful pools, glowing like two suns. I smile at him and take another
spoonful of chocolate icecream into my mouth. “Hmmm.” I moan, enjoying the sugar
overloading my taste buds. ~ Spike ~ “Yeah, hmmm.” I moan with him,
holding his gaze. I wish I could taste him again. I would be content with just
a short lick of his lips, one thrust of my tongue into his mouth, one short nip
of his neck, one delicious droplet of his blood, one suck on his hard cock,
dipping my tongue into the tiny slit, feeling the sticky pre-cum on my lips… oh
fuck it, I want it all. Bloody hell. No. No. No. No. No. “So you wanted to talk?” He asks
and looks up at me through lowered lashes. Lowered lashes in a not seductive
way. Lowered lashes ‘cause he is so tired he can’t hold open his puppy dog eyes
any longer. “We can talk about it tomorrow.” “Yeah, sure.” He yawns and I am
impressed how wide he can open his mouth. Definitely something we can work
with. Hmmm… His head comes down to lie on his
crossed arms on the table. The brown curls fall forward, hiding his face. “Hey! Don’t fall asleep here!” I
nudge his elbow a little roughly and he is on his feet, eyes wide, in less than
a second. “I didn’t mean to…” “Shh, it’s okay. You nearly fell
asleep. I just woke you so you can go sleep in your bed. It’s more comfortable
anyway.” I try to sound calm and not to let on how angry these little relapses
make me. When I get his bloody father in my hands… Xanpet nods wobbly and disappears
with a weak “G’night.” into his room. He leaves the door open and I wonder if
he did it on purpose or if he's just too tired to care. Part Six ~ Scents 2 ~ Xander ~ As soon as I'm not near Spike, my sleepiness leaves my body for a feeling of utter frustration. Undressing down to my briefs quickly I crawl under the fresh sheets. Dark green satin envelops me, soothing my skin, chilling my flesh. It’s a bed made for two persons and I feel alone. I'm restless. I can’t sleep. My body feels so heavy and my muscles are tired but my mind cannot calm down. Bits and pieces of the last hasty days flit through my mind, making me even more frustrated. Forcing myself to lay still, I concentrate on my breathing like I do when I want to go to my safe place. Only after a few minutes I catch
myself not concentrating on my breathing at all. Instead I am listening to the
unfamiliar sounds of the apartment. I wonder why I can’t hear any noise from
the club at all and make a note to ask Spike about that. Spike. Hm. Wish he would snore or
something, anything that would tell me that he's there, just a few feet away
from me. I turn to lie on my other side and close my eyes again. Open them,
close them, open them, close them. Years ago I read about this trick. After a while
the eyelids are so strained and heavy, they just won’t open anymore and one
should fall asleep after that immediately. Open, close, open, close, open,
close, open, close, open, close, (sneeze) WIDE OPEN! Huh? (sneezesneesneeze) I sit up
straight on the bed. “Spike?” “Ye(sneeze) bloody *snee*…ell!” Sneezing Spike? Sneezing vampire? SNEEZING VAMPIRE! “SPIKE?” My heart starts hammering
against my ribs. There is no way, Spike is sneezing. And if he's really
sneezing, something is seriously wrong. ~ Spike ~ This is (sneeze) ridiculous and the
whelp starts (snee) panicking. I am just (sneesneesneezzze) sneezing. Bloody
fucking hell. What is this? (sniffle) I scent the sheets. (sneezesneeze) I just have to laugh. ~ Xander ~ Oh fuck. He's mad or someone,
something did a spell on him. He starts laughing madly, the
occasional sneezing and cursing interrupting. I can nearly see the tears of
laughter run down his face, so hard is he laughing. “SPIKE!? WHAT IS WRONG?” Nope, not panicking at all.
Everything is pretty normal – just not the damn vampire in the other room
sneezing and laughing himself to death! ~ Spike ~ Think I just
(sneezelaughterlaughtersneezebloodylaughterlaughtersneezehell) tell him before
he gets a seizure or something. Whelp’s caring so much. “The bloody idiot (sneezelaughter)
put rose scented perfume on all the (sneezelaughterlaughter) bleedin’ sheets!”
(laughter) ~ Xander ~ That’s it? No world ending now?
Just damn rose scented perfume? Doesn’t he know that… And that’s when I realize
why Spike is laughing so hard. And I just have to join in. “You’re a vampire, he should know
you can smell much better…” “Yeah, but (sneesnee…) I didn’t do
this in over a century!” (sneezzzee) I can clearly picture the expression
on Spike’s face when he felt the first tickling in his nose and suddenly
sneezed. Something akin to disbelief, denial, confusion and incredibility. It’s
making me just laugh harder. ~ Spike ~ He's bloody laughing at me! (pout) “Stop that (sneeze) now whelp!” Oh
yes very convincing. “This is making me pretty nauseous.
It’s (sneeze) not funny.” ~ Xander ~ Oh, poor pouting Spikeybaby…
(laughing) “Come over, bed’s big enough for
two.” Did I really say that? Oh. My. God. Silence. ~ Spike ~ Did I really hear that? Did he offer me his bed with him
in it? Silence. Hm. “You wouldn’t mind?” (swallow) Silence. ~ Xander ~ “Nope, shared before, didn’t we?” Fucking fast mouth of mine. Pics of me and Spike cuddling
flooding me. The feel of his body against mine. Silence. Then: sheets shifting, a dresser
opening, closing, more sheets shifting. Oh fuck, Spike just put on
underwear. He was naked! Naked Spike in black satin sheets! NAKED SPIKE on black satin sheets. Image overload. Please restart your brain. GAH! Not that brain! (swallow) Mantiswoman. Larry. Mummygirl.
Mummygirl. Mantiswoman. Doesntworkdoesntwork… Footsteps towards my room. Dad beating the shit out of me. Dad
beating the shit of me and jerking off. I am the master of self control.
That’s me, Xand-man! It’s very dark, but I can see
Spike’s pale body in the door jamb. He's only wearing dark boxer shorts,
stands there unconsciously shifting his weight from foot to foot. “You sure?” he asks me. Nodding I
hold the sheets up for him to slide under them. ~ Spike ~ Whelp’s got a pair. No hint of fear
or insecurity. Just a welcoming smile and a gesture that says more than words.
So I just follow and get into the bed next to him. We both lie on our backs,
pretending to fall asleep but studying the ceiling instead. The silence is
awkward. ~ Xander ~ Spike. In. My. Bed. Again. I may be human but I can see his
eyes are open and he is as uncomfortable as I am even without the superior
eyesight. I sigh. Spike sighs. Neither of us says anything for long
minutes. And I just can’t take it anymore. “Damn it! Come here.” I open my
arms and less than a second later, a hard cool vampire is pressed against me,
his head pillowed on my shoulder. ~ Spike ~ I win. I tell the warning voice in
my head. I am where I want to be without even bloody lying or manipulating it.
‘M good. Warmth. Xanpet. Safe. “Better?” He asks and shifts a
little, his chin resting against my forehead. “Hmhm.” No purring. Don’t purr. I
am the Big Bad. Big Bad does NOT purr. ~ Xander ~ His skin feels good against mine.
Chest and legs. Chin and hands. All pressed against Spike. Good. Peace. Safe. Moving a little I press my lips
against his forehead. Giving him an all innocent good night kiss, when I
remember something. “Can I ask you something?” ~ Spike ~ I feel his lips press against my
skin above the eyebrows. Leaning into the touch, I wish I could demand more,
have my way with him. Now. The warning voice in my head yells at me not to rush
things. My nether regions demand to rush things. Would be easier, if they would
agree on something. When he whispers the question, his
warm full lips don’t leave my skin, they brush against my forehead, the breath
washing over my skin like the warmest summer breeze you can imagine. “J’st ask.” “Which one is the primary one?”
More summer wind, more velvet mouth nuzzling me. “The other.” I say before I am even
able to think about possible consequences. ~ Xander ~ Xand-man the Vamp-X-pert. “I knew that.” Gently parting my
lips, scraping my lower lip along his brow. “Is this one uncomfortable or
something? Like a mask?” Taking his brow between my lips, tugging it softly. What am I doing? ~ Spike ~ What is the whelp doing? I breathe
in deeply, trying to get the whole spectrum of his scents to learn what exactly
he feels right now. Comfort. Safety. No fear. Arousal - but not the
jump-my-bones kind, more the teasing-I-am-interested-in-you kind. Good thing, he can’t do the
smelling thing. I don’t know how he would react to the
barely-restraining-from-jumping-your-bones-right-now-again-and-again-until-you-do-not-know-your-own-name-anymore
smell. He definitely can’t smell me. Would be running by now. And what was the
question again? Ah. “No, not a mask. Dru said it’s like
wearing make up, you need some effort to put it on, then you nearly forget it
but you always know it’s there somewhere in your mind so you don’t wipe it off
accidentally. ~ Xander ~ “So you can’t get totally
comfortable without it?” Sigh. “No. It’s like the tiniest
itch in the back of my mind, keeping me aware of what I present to the
outside.” Hm. “You can change, it doesn’t
bother me. You know…” “Xan, I…” “It’s okay. Your choice. No prob.”
Pressing my lips a little harder to his forehead. “Just wanted you to know.
Night Spike.” A last caress. Deep breath. Smoke, sex, leather, sex, hair gel,
sex, blood, sex. Spike scent. And the slightest hint of roses. Smiling, I drift into sleep. ~ Spike ~ Bloody tease! My tease. Nuzzling closer to the warm neck I
follow nummy into the land of dreams. Part Seven ~ Bed & Breakfast I ~ Xander ~ It must be midday. When I move,
Spike whimpers. Not the good whimper, more the don’t-leave-me-whimper. To be
alone must hurt really hard after a century with Dru. Even insane, she was
always there for him, giving him something to do, something so he could feel
needed, feel loved, worthy of existence. Yeah, Xander. Way to go with the
philosophy of the evil undead. I turn around as fast as the strong
arms holding me allow. And again I am face to face with
the demon. Not afraid. Not even surprised. I wonder why I totally lost my fear
of the wilder aspects of this man. Vampire. My arms are stuck between our
chests. And I so want to touch his features. I want to explore them, find out
how they feel. In my time as a scoobie, we dusted
so many vamps, but none of us ever got the chance of touching them. Well, none
of us wanted to touch a vamp. Buffy though. Would Angel let her touch the
vampiric face? Did she want to? Don’t think so. They were both too busy
pretending they were just the normal teenage couple. Yeah, how that worked out. So, staring at the distorted – no,
not distorted. They are just different from the normal human face. Hah! Demon
here. I still stare on the demon face. Still want to touch it, but can’t ‘cause
my hands are trapped. My mouth is not trapped, I could easily reach the
forehead. Well, why not? Spike didn’t mind me kissing him good night yesterday,
so… ~ Spike ~ Wanna sleep. Stop moving. ‘m tired.
Don’t go. Wanna sleep. Stop movin’. Why are ya starin’ ‘t me. More sleep. Now. Oh,
lips. Warm. Hmmm. More lips. More warmth. So good. Feels so good. ~ Xander ~ My lips. Spike’s forehead. My lips
on Spike’s forehead. Easy. The softness I remember from the
good night kiss is gone, the skin is like leather now, still smooth but harder,
more resistant. I drag my mouth along the ridges, putting more pressure in it
so the caress gets through the harder skin. It just invites you to play rough.
The bumps are formed out of bones with only a thin layer of skin over them. Not
unlike the collarbone or the bones under the eyebrows. Spike leans into the touch, presses
against my mouth. It gives me the belly flopping. Some moments ago I thought he
would start to … well purr would be the right expression, but I don’t think he
can do it. Not like a cat at least. If a vampire could purr, it would be
somewhere in the books or Buffy would have told us about it. She would’ve never
been able to hold back such a “cute” detail about “her” Angel. It must have
been just a deep, long drawn out moan. My lips continue to explore his
bumpy forehead and I can’t stop my tongue from darting out. I lick along the
sharp contours, at first just with the tip of my tongue, shyly. ~ Spike ~ Warm, wet silk, sliding over my
flesh. Hm. Feels good. Where did he get silk? I open my eyes and draw in a
lungful of Xandersmell. I can see his throat, his muscles working. God, he's
licking me. He's overstepping boundaries. Only mates and sires are allowed to
do that, but fuck… this feels so good. My fists are buried in the satin sheets.
The fabric crumbles under the pressure. I want to touch him so badly… Don’t
want to scare him, but I have to touch him. My hand rises to his hair, fingers
tangle into soft, dark locks. A rougher caress of his tongue, his whole tongue.
Gripping harder, straining the hair when he gets bolder, when cat licks change
to greedy strokes of that hot thick piece of muscle. A light shove of his
hands, fingers like claws scratching over my pecs. I moan, I can’t help it. ~ Xander ~ God, his skin is so cool, so
smooth. I love to feel it. He's awake now, his hand in my hair, gripping it
just right. Not too hard but firmly. He moans and I have to do something before
this gets out of hand. What am I doing? Why am I doing this? This is Spike, a
male vampire! But gods, he feels good. Scratching over his chest with my
fingers, pawing like a cat. “Feels good?” I whisper and my
breath dries the wet trails my tongue painted. “Good, so good…” He moans hoarsely. My lips find the scar and I suck on
it, enticing a whimper from Spike. The skin here isn’t as leathery as
elsewhere. I capture the scarred skin between my teeth, lightly nipping on it.
Spike shudders. God, he's so sensitive. dreeeppdreeepp dreeeppdreeepp ~ Spike ~ Oh no. The fucking phone. Not now.
Fuck. No. “What's that sound?” “Phone.” Silence. dreeeppdreeepp dreeeppdreeepp “Go, answer it. That sound is
fucking annoying.” “No.” Silence. Nummy is shifting away. “Don’t wanna go. Comfy.” My
patented pout. No one can resist that… dreeeppdreeepp dreeeppdreeepp dreeeppdreeepp dreeeppdreeepp “GO and KILL it, it’s already dying
the way it sounds!” I have to laugh at his last comment.
I look at him. He is gorgeous like this, spread
out on the bed, sure of himself, the hair tousled, eyes glittering with energy.
He smiles at me and I forget why I was laughing at all. dreeeppdreeepp dreeeppdreeepp dreeeppdreeepp dreeeppdreeepp Ah yes, bloody phone. I walk over
into my room, planning my revenge on the caller. How dare he interrupt me
snogging with the boy! Hm. I could scream in the receiver as loud as I can…
wonder if my chip would react, if I do some long distance ear shattering… “Grr.” “Oh, Spike, love. I didn’t wake
you, did I?” Treck’s honey dripping voice sounds not even half as good on the
phone than in real life. “Grrrrwhatchawant?” And make it
short, want to go back to bed to the warm human. “Gah, baby, love it when you're so
– hmm – beast-y. Do you remember the…” “Yes. Remember. Vamp. remember?
Good memory. Treckle, you wanted what?” “The things you ordered for the boy
are here. Shall I bring them up or do you need help with the kid?” Voice cold
now. “I can do that by myself, thank
you.” I press the ‘end call’ button before he gets a chance to say anything
further. I really have to talk to him. ~ Xander ~ That's Treckle on the phone. I
can’t make sense out of their ‘relationship’. Sometimes it looks like they’re
gonna fuck each other silly then and there and other times they could kill each
other with looks alone. Oh, hey Vampire flying towards my
bed. Oumph. “Spike!” I laugh out loud because
of the sheepish expression on his face. “Mmh. Nummy.” He mumbles while he
digs his head deep between my shoulder and my chin. I am shocked by the natural
way my hand comes up to cup his head and my leg lifts to let his rest between
mine. Not long after sleep captures me
and pulls me into protected unconsciousness. I wake up to the sensation of
someone sucking gently on my neck. Spike is spooned behind me, his arms
embracing me. Something hard presses in the cleft of my ass and yes, that must
be Spike’s cock, fully erect, nearly leaking. Gah. I can smell blood and again I am
confused, why I can separate this smell so sharply from all others around. And
why can I tell precisely that it is my blood and that it is not much? My body is humming happily. Lazy
sensations crawling in slow waves away from the throbbing on my neck through my
whole body down to my steel-hard dick. Gah. Spike didn’t bite me, there is no
pain, not the feeling of being intruded by something long and hard… Gah. Spike
rocks against me, purrs contently. Hah! Purring. They do it! I think Spike just grazed the skin
with the fangs, accidentally breaking the skin. My god, they must be sharp. I
feel his tongue licking on my skin, massaging it to get more of my blood out of
the tiny wound. He is so desperate, wish I could take this chip out. Huh?
That's a disturbing thought. Spike free again. Why would he still stay with me when
he was free to kill again? He wouldn’t spend a second thought on me, drain me
and go. My erection gone, I only feel my
bladder demanding urgent attention. “Spike?” I whisper and he doesn’t
answer me. So he's really still asleep, doesn't even know what he's doing. I
climb out of his embrace with some difficulty, assuring a whimpering Spike that
I don’t go farther away than to the bathroom. Part Eight ~ Bed & Breakfast II ~ Xander ~ Cute. Cute. Cute. He is such a baby! After I relieved myself, I stare in
the mirror. On my neck, where the shoulder begins is the mother of all hickies.
Looks like I was right with my theory. There is just one shallow cut where one
fang nicked my skin. It’s already closed and fading. I wonder why I don’t
freak. I should freak, shouldn’t I? I had a vampire sucking on my neck for
god’s sake! It’s about 4 p.m. and I’m hungry. I
go to the fridge to make me something to eat. There is enough for two big
sandwiches, I withstand the urge to open the crisper drawer where Spike keeps
his blood, which I nearly gulp down. It’s weird. Even after the big sandwiches
I feel like something is missing. A little piece of chocolate perhaps? I am
still hungry for something special… I really have to go shopping to stock up on
Twinkies or something. There is nothing different for me
to do so I go into Spike’s room, open the window, so the fresh wind can take
the penetrating rose scent away. I strip the sheets, put them into the washer,
collect the rose leaves and throw them away. The scented candles and the rose
bouquets get new places in the living, training and kitchen spaces. Our bags
are still out besides the front door, so I bring them in and unpack them. I see
the chocolate and the whiskey on the bedside table. The chocolate makes it's way
into the fridge, while I give the whiskey a new home in the bedside table. When
I open the drawer I see the biggest tube of lube I ever saw and several pairs
of leather and metal cuffs. Gah. Panic. Swallow. Again. Deep
breath. Gah. My mind feeds me with shocked
numbness and jealous pictures of a naked Spike cuffed to the iron frame of the
bed, moaning and wriggling, unnecessary panting, his cock and balls glistering
from wetness out of the monster lube tube. The whiskey is pushed in and the
drawer slams shut. God! Get a grip, Xander, damn it! ~ Spike ~ Nothin’ so nice as to wake up
with a start because of a hammerin’
heartbeat. What did the whelp find now? Got
his knickers in a twist right good. Poor heart is pumpin’ for all it’s worth.
And it’s worth a lot. Getting out of the bed, I stagger
over to my room. My room? What the hell is he doing in my… Oi, whelp, give me
more. Just bend a little more and lose your clothes before. Great, hard now.
Why is he putting satin sheets on the bed? Ah right, the rose scent. Can’t wait
to get me out of his bed, can he? Bloody tease. Wriggles his ass at me and it’s
all just much ado about nothing. Dark blue sheets, perfect for his tan. Would
look bloody gorgeous on that fabric. Naked. Grrr. ~ Xander ~ I spin around when I hear growling
behind me. Fuck. Spike, in black briefs, hard as… the hardest thing you can
imagine. “Mornin’.” He grumbles, love him
like this, all dishevelled and pouting. “Erh, morning lube, Spike. I mean
hard morning, Spike!” Goofy grin, hoping that he is still too groggy to get the
slip. ~ Spike ~ Morning lube? Hard morning? Got
some impressive slips going this early. So huh? Cocking one eyebrow, leaning my
head to one side, smirk in place, I just look at him. And he gets this expression in his
eyes which fresh mommies get over their just born babies. Huh? This is the arrogant
Big Bad face. The you-cannot-hide-anything-from-me face. And he looks at me
like I were a newborn kitten. Grrrr. ~ Xander ~ The attitude works when he's in
his black uniform, duster in place, cig in hand, locks gelled back, but… Now,
in only briefs and the hair standing up in all directions and curly around the
base of his skull, nope. Looks like a kitten, just awoken, wanting to snuggle. “Cute.” I say loud before I can
stop myself. “’M not cute!” “Are too.” “Am not cute. Handsome. Sexy.”
Rubbing with one fist on his eye. “That you are too.” I say boldly,
blushing immediately and shocked by my own courage. Suddenly his expression changes,
becomes fearful and disturbed. In one fast movement he's right in front of me,
examining my hicky. ~ Spike ~ He's the cute one, especially when
he's blushing like a shy virgin and turning his head sideways, looking to the
ground embarrassed. Hey, what's that? A hicky? Oh fuck. I'm in front of him
before I can think, one hand grabbing his chin, raising his head and the other
poking on the hicky. “I'm sorry, Xan. I wasn’t aware
of… did I hurt you? I didn’t want to…” “Stop it, Spike.” He commands
firmly. “But you’re hurt. I bit you!” And I
can’t even remember it! Fuck. “I'm not hurt. And you didn’t bite
me.” Wish you could. “But…” why is he still here. Should
panic and flee when I nibble on his neck. “No but. We were both sleeping. I
just saw it in the mirror. It didn’t hurt. Your chip hasn't gone off. It must
have been an accident. You just scraped me with one of your fangs. No biggie.” “You’re not mad.” ~ Xander ~ “No.” Why should I be mad, if it
doesn’t even bother me? He stares at me as if I grew a second head. Or as if I'm a totally different person than before. Maybe I am. I smile reassuringly at
him. My gaze drifts down to one dark nipple, stays there. Sucking or biting or
both? What would he prefer? I barely catch myself before my
mouth can ask the question out loud. Poooh. “Go feed. I want to shower. I ate
already. Your clothes are in the dresser.” I say and make a run for the
bathroom. “Xan?” He calls. “Yeah?” I turn around, the knob of
the bathroom door already in my hand. “First suck them ‘til they’re hard
and then bite them.” He snaps his teeth and smirks. GAH! I said that loud! I nearly
fall through the bathroom door and shut it firmly behind me, panting. I can hardly get in the shower
before my hand grabs my hard nearly bursting cock. I picture again Spike’s
nipples, the feel of them against my mouth, how they would get hard, when I
suck them and how I would bite down, gently at first, then harder, Spike
arching into the delicious pain… I come faster and harder than ever before in
my whole life. And wow did I have some quick orgasms. When the fog lifts in my head a
little, it hits me, that Spike must be able to smell the flood of pheromones but
hey, I am a young man! Full of raging hormones. Young men like me jerk off in
the shower! Constantly. ~ Spike ~ With my back against the bathroom
door I am able to hear the wonderful little noises he makes, the low,
suppressed moans and groans. I shudder, when he comes fast and
hard, a deep nearly growling sound, unsuppressed rolls out of his throat. I look down on my own begging
erection. Sigh. I'm too old to quickly jerk off and hide the evidence. I want
into the shower. Want to bathe in the pheromones and the scent of semen from my
nummy while I wank. When the door opens, light years
later, I act fast. I slide along his whole, still lightly wet body, pressing
myself against him, breathing in deeply, absorbing the gasp he makes, enter the
bathroom and close the door behind me. Everything in less than two seconds.
Nearly flying into the shower stall, I get dizzy from the musky mix of scents.
Fisting my cock with fast hard strokes, inhaling deeply, the force of the
need makes me tremble, I cum whimpering. Bloody hell. ~ Xander ~ Huh? Spike really needs to shower,
heh? When I'm dressed and through with
the unpacking of my bags, I go back to the main room. Spike is dressed, black
jeans, black shirt, barefoot, and crouched in front of the entertainment centre,
sorting through the mix of his and my cds. He looks up and smirks at me. Yeah,
I’m pheromone boy, say hello! I grab a pencil and some paper sheets and sit
down at the dining table. I note down the things I remember from the bar. After
a few moments I decide I need help. Biting my lip, I try to figure out the best
approach, so I don’t get too much laughter from Spike. Fuck it! “Spike?” “Hm?” “Can you help me with this? I wanna
make a list and get it right.” I see the curiosity in his face
when he walks towards me. I show him my list and he runs away. Huh? “Erm Spike…?” Oh there he is again, with little
cards in different colours. His eyes starts to sparkle when he explains to me
how the different colours belong to different demons and the drinks could
easily be written down on them, so I had them at hand quickly every time. Unh
huh. I never saw Spike this enthusiastic, not even when he fought against
demons and won. He's kneeling on one chair, the cards sorted by colour on the
table, he notes down names and shoves them around… Oh god. God or whoever,
whatever… help me… he's a Giles! “Look,” he begins, not even
noticing my horrified eyes. “I sorted the demons by origin or relation. For
every demon a card with information on it. Starting with drinks, allergic
reaction, language and some specialties. You just have to complete the
information when you serve them, look it up when you need it or learn it in
your free time.” Huh? Please Giles-Spike, mercy! But the idea is good, I get
behind the system fast and it’s really good. Spike helps me to complete the
information I had from the barkeepers last night. While he writes, the tip of his
tongue peeks out and I have to suppress the urge to capture it between my teeth
and bite it until it bleeds. Whoa. I shudder and he looks strangely at me.
Goofy grin. This will not work forever, if I don’t get this out of my system, I
have to talk to him… ~ Spike ~ If he thinks he can get away with
flashing the goofy grin at me, he is seriously wrong. I know, there's
something he wants or wants not to talk about. If he does not deliberately, I
will ask him. Silly git. Can tell me everything. Should know that. Part Nine ~ Truth I ~ Xander ~ “Spike?” “Hmhm.” “Who...
what is Treckle?” “Mekta
Demon.” Spike says without hesitation but as if that would answer all my
questions. I wait for a moment, and hope
that Spike gets a clue. “and?”
I prompt finally, trying an annoyed undertone so he doesn’t notice how hard it
is for me to ask for something, even if it’s just some information. Shut
up! Why do YOU need to know that? Just SHUT UP before I SHUT YOU UP!” ~ Spike ~ Well,
time for that talk then. All painful
memories, please get in line! Why
does he have to ask this before work, bloody hell! I can’t even drink myself into a stupor
before I have to dig everything out. But,
one drink is good. I go over to the bar
in the living room and take out my best whiskey. I see nummy’s look but ignore it. I know he doesn’t like people (me) drinking. I
fill a big tumbler and try to give him a whiff of the stuff. When he smells the full and noble flavour, he
relaxes instantly and I have to grin. As
if you couldn’t get drunk on the expensive booze and beat your kid to a bloody
pulp. “’K.
Mekta demons are empaths. You know, they feel what you feel... “ Ouch, I flinch
away from the look in his eyes, just as I imagined this would go. ~ Xander ~ “Asshole!”
I can’t believe this. Damn you fucking vampire! “I'm sorry, okay? I... “ “Oh
just can it! So did he give you some clues about me?” I turn away and start to
pace. I am so damn angry, my whole body is anger. And the deep calming breaths
are just like more oil to the fire. “No!
We didn’t talk about you at all!” Oh,
not that important, huh? Just a stupid human boy. “Xan...” “Fuck
you Spike!” ~ Spike ~ Oh
bloody hell! I didn’t even ask Treckle for a peek inside nummy’s feelings! They
are obvious anyway. Everybody is able to tell what goes on in his head and
heart just by taking one look into his eyes. “You
can block him with a specially made amulet. I'll get you one if you want...” “WANT?
Of course I fucking want one!” I watch him pace and feel myself harden. The
muscles of his whole body are tense, his fists clench and unclench, his strong
jaw works, eyes are wild and dark with rage. Mhmmm, my demon wants this beauty,
wants to tame it without breaking. “You’ll
get one. Promise. As soon as possible.” One
fast move and he is in front of me, “And how soon...” yelling in my face,
grabbing my shirt, “is soon?” Shaking me so hard the fabric creaks under his
fingers but his gaze never wavers. I am not able to move, I am captured in his
flaming eyes forever. Take
me...spank me... make me yours... my demon whispers to the beast inside him,
but it won’t hear me. Waiting
for an answer I am not able to give so close to him, he pushes me away
suddenly. I stumble backwards, clumsily seeking the support of the bar counter. “Two
days. Not longer.” I eventually manage to croak out. He
sits down again and takes my tumbler in one hand. Staring at the alcohol swirling
lazily in circles, he nods over to my chair in a silent order to sit down. I
comply. He
turns the glass again and again with sure, experienced finger movements until
he brings the tumbler to his mouth and empties it in one long swallow. The
clank of the glass set down on the wooden bar is loud in the heavy silence.
Transfixed I stare at the pink tip of the whelp’s tongue, sneaking out to
collect the last traces of liquid from a sinful upper lip. “’K.”
He says and I wait for him to continue. I grab the bottle and refill the
tumbler but he's not even looking at it. Instead his gaze is fixed on
something behind me, over my head. ~ Xander ~ That’s
it. Time for the goodbye. Have a nice life. Fuck. Yay Harris. Congrats,
you screwed up again! “I'm sorry.” HUH? He's sorry, yes, well, he had this psycho demon check me out
so he should feel guilty... guilty? Spike? Nah. “It’s
okay, forget it! It’s just I don’t like people looking inside my head. Hate
to go to the dentist.” ~ Spike ~ I
start to chuckle. Who could resist this naive charm tinged with the blackest
humour? I
definitely can’t and I wish I was allowed to hug and kiss him mercilessly to
punish him for the drama queen scene he just made. And
there is that look again. Grrr. The shy gaze up through lowered lashes. So
want to see if he still looks shy when he has my cock down his throat and looks
up at me while he sucks... ah, damn. One hand goes to my crotch to make the
growing spike more comfortable. “So
fire away, wot d’ya wanna know?” “Treckle.
How did you meet?” Ahhh. “Jealous?”
I tease and regret it the moment the words leave my mouth. A
short flash of anger and then only hurt reflects in his eyes. ~ Xander ~ It’s
not that I can compare myself to Treckle or even challenge him. He is gorgeous
and they have history together... “Alright.
I was searching for a place to settle down about five years back and when I
went out to have a look at a few possible buildings the sales clerk brought
Treckle with him, ‘coz he was looking for a new club location. We
had a look at various houses and finally I decided on this one, even if it was
too big for me but he asked if we could share it and so we did. It was okay
with me ‘coz I wasn’t planning on staying here at that time. I just wanted to
have something safe as a fallback.” “Go
on!” Why not tell me everything, come on, how did you get into each other’s
pants? I sneer inside my head. But it looks like Spike can hear it pretty good. “Everything is 50/50. We both own the club and the building.” Spike takes
a deep breath and leans forward, elbows on the bar, his hands in his hair,
gaze on the shiny reflection-less dark wood. I
look up but Spike still stares down at our entwined hold. Then:
“I found Treckle and blocked out everything with him.” I want to rip my hand
away, don’t want to touch what will never be mine, but Spike holds me, prevents
my escape and looks up at me. Blue eyes, cold and distant bore into mine when
he continues to speak. “We
had a good time. Half a year of fun.” Thousands
of pictures of positions and a laughing, cuming, moaning Spike flash through my
mind. “He
fell for me, I didn’t. When he told me, I wanted to talk with him but one of my
minions interrupted us. I was told that Dru had killed nearly all the minions
in her preparations for the comeback of the mighty Angelus. She'd sorted out the
unworthy. He told me that my minions had to strap her to a bed ‘coz she wanted
to go out, dance in the sun, get a tan, be pretty or some such rot. I went
straight back to her.” What
a bad pun! “She
calmed down, took me back and we came back to Sunnyhell for the real comeback
of Angelus thanks to Slutty. The rest is what you know.” I
nod. ~ Spike ~ “He
thought, he could have you while you were still with Dru?” I
nod and try not to notice the warm fingertips starting to move. “Well, he never stood a chance. Pretty bad empath if you ask me.” He says
with a totally sincere face and I have to chuckle. I nearly missed the
next – whispered - question. Part Ten ~ Truth II ~ Xander ~ Damn, why did I ask that? I look down;
fleeing from the pity I'm sure to find in his eyes. My reflection stares up
at me and I have to suppress a groan. Sometimes being human is a curse. I close
my eyes, not wanting to see my misery mirrored right back at me. I bend my
elbow, resting my forehead on my arm and grab the edge of the table. The
feeling of heavy massive wood under my fingers always gives me the pretence of
safety. He increases the pressure on my
hand a bit and I am suddenly very aware of the smooth coolness of his long
fingers. The tips start to move as mine already are, caressing the part where
hand and arm meet. “He still hits on me. I… my
feelings for him are still the same.” One fingernail scrapes along one of my pulsing
veins and I shiver lightly. Nevertheless: “So you don’t love
him but mess with him?” Yes, I am upset. I am not sure what bothers me more.
Spike fucking him and not me… whoa… or Spike using him. The fingertips still and I turn my
head to the side, glancing up at Spike when he doesn’t respond to me. He looks
at me, frowning and cocks an eyebrow. “I don’t fuck him anymore, if
that’s what you mean. I wouldn’t use him like that, but he's stubborn. He
still hits on me nearly all the time. Not that I am not flattered, he is
beautiful.” Spike’s eyes glaze over and get distant. I know he thinks back to
times he had that beautiful man, yes he is beautiful, I give him that, in his
bed, in his arms. Reluctantly, but determinedly, I
pry my hand away and stand up. “Time to get ready for work.” I
offer as an apology to cover up how it pains me, that plain memories can get
Spike so distracted. I bet his cock is already rock hard just recalling these
pictures of this dark haired, muscled demon under him, begging for more of his
thick cock inside… GAH. I so have to get ready for work! Now! ~ Spike ~ Huh? Where's the whelp? Damn. “Whelp?” “My room.” “Are you getting ready for work?” “What does it look like, genius?”
Grrr. He flinches, not from my growling but because he fears to get kicked out
for his bitching. “You haven’t even eaten yet.” He
stares at me and I repeat the last sentence in my head. Bloody hell! “I am not hungry. I’ll eat after
work…” Oh, he bites his lips but I can so hear the “mom” in the end! A sly grin crawls up on my face
when I remember my plan. Oh yeah. He looks at me, his expression changes from
amused to slightly scared. “Spike?” He asks with a, more
put-on than not, tremble in his voice. “Yes pet?” I answer, grin
cheerfully and try to look innocent. “The innocent look really doesn’t
work for you.” He says laughing but still worried. “No?” I pout and try puppy dog
eyes. And so have to laugh. He is right, innocence grabs its stuff and runs away
screaming when the demon moves in. “What are you up to?” I look pointedly
at his crotch, where the slightly larger than normal outline of his cock shows. “Me?” Oh, what a delicious blush. “You.” He nevertheless gets out and
his fingers twitch in their urge to poke me in the chest. Oooh, wish he would
use something different to poke me. However, I will so not bottom for a human,
not even for this nummy human. “I have clothes for you.” I say and
grin. “Clothes?” “Yes.” “For tonight?” “Yes.” “No.” “Oh yes!” “Oh no Spike!” ~ Xander ~ Who the hell knows what he has for me. Red silk and leather? No way. Do
you hear me? NO WAY. “Oh come on! You haven’t even
looked at them!” Spike pouts and that is a look that
really works for him. That lower lip stuck out and the pleading blue eyes,
looking up from under thick black lashes, get him everything he desires in this
world. I bet they work on Treckle. Not on me though. “NO.” “Please.” He whines and are those
tears in his eyes?! Oh damn you. “But no red silk for me!” His eyes lighten up and he actually
jumps a little. Who are you and where is my Spike? He grabs me by the hand and
pulls me all the way to his bedroom. I am pushed on the bed. Oh yeah, take me… whoa. Spike produces a big brown paper bag from under the bed and takes something black out. Leather pants. NO WAY. “No.” I say and try to scramble
backwards. He holds me on my ankle and pulls me back. “You haven’t even tried them on.” “No way do I wear leather!” “You ever wore real leather?” “No, but…” “How do you know if you like it or
not?” “I won’t wear these pants…” I
relent. “tonight.” The pout again and then: “Figured
that, but it was worth the try.” He looks sad for a second – damn good actor, I
grit my teeth – then flings the trousers away. I have the urge to get them off
the floor and fold them neatly. It’s just that I never had someone buying me
clothes and thinking about how I’ll look in them. He gets another item out of the
bag. Faded black jeans. I sigh. “At least try them on.” Just jeans
right? How can I get out of it? “Okay, but when I don’t like them…” “Yeah, yeah, you don’t have to wear
them.” He interrupts me impatiently and rolls his sparkling blue eyes. Another
item is taken out, this time it’s a dark blue shirt. I take it and feel the
stretchy fabric between my fingers. “Spandex.” He tells me. “I like the colour.” I say and am
rewarded with a bright smile. He shows me a light blue silk button-up with
short arms. “You can wear it over it.” He lays
everything on the bed, black briefs on top of it. I don’t blush. Really, I
don’t. ~ Spike ~ “You try them on?” I ask excited
and could slap myself for acting so out of character. What can I say? Operation
Nummy has started. No backing out allowed. He ushers me out of the room and
closes the door. He’ll look so good in these clothes. I can barely wait to see
him in them. ~ Xander ~ Hi new clothes! I am Xander and I
will put you on now. Be nice to me. Yeah, sure. Insane much? The jeans are
tight, damn breathtaking tight. But they feel good. Way more expensive than my
other ones. Finer and smoother. The dark blue shirt feels like a second skin. Wish
I had abs like Spike. His sixpack looks like it’s carved into marble. I want to
lick it and see/feel the single muscles contract under my tongue. Damn, down
boy. Too tight jeans! I put on the button-up, it reaches
just down to the beginning of the jeans. Only two buttons. Hm, I definitely
like the feel of Spandex and silk. I’m not sure if I am self-confident enough
to wear this in public, but behind the bar in the dark nobody really sees it.
Nevertheless I wish I had a mirror. “You ready?” I hear Spike call
impatiently. “Yep. Come in.” Deep breath. The door springs open instantly and
Spike saunters in, staring. God no. I feel the blush rising in my cheeks. “You look delicious, pet, but…” He
says, voice husky. Damn, I knew it. It’s not me, not my ‘style’, my ‘look’. I
didn’t see price tags, I hope he can take them back. “But?” I ask eventually, wanting
the full truth, wanting the pain and humiliation. Maybe it’ll cure me from this
ridiculous desire for the evil undead. He comes really close to me, staring
unblinkingly in my eyes, filling my horizon with deep dark blue. “But you forgot something.” He
whispers, cool breath puffing against my lips. I look down, unable to hold his
gaze and see his hand aiming for my groin. No no no no no … His thumb and index finger grab my
zipper and he pulls it up very slowly. His knuckles slide all the way against
my fast wakening cock. I whimper. Did I whimper? I don’t
whimper. I meet the blazing blue of his
glazed eyes and he blinks at me as if in slow motion. His hands now come up on both sides
of my neck, smoothing down my collar. One cool thumb scrapes against the little
mark he gave me that morning. I bite back another girly whimper. “You ready for your first day,
luv?” Shit, work, oh god, yes, no. “Arghmdn.” He chuckles and combs his fingers
through my hair a few times. Oh yeah, what work? Just keep on doing that,
Spike. But he stops and tugs on a strand hard. “Owww.” “Come on! You’re prepared with
basic knowledge, you were a bartender before!” I look strangely at him. Does he
know how that ended? Beer bad! “You look pretty hot…” Goofy grin,
instantly swept away by his hand running down my chest. “I'm sure you’ll make
me proud.” I look uncertain and bite my bottom
lip. For a few seconds Spike’s gaze is fixed on that. See! Xan-man can tease too! Part Eleven ~ Debuts I ~ Spike ~ Bloody hell. If I have to wait longer,
I’ll explode. That boy doesn’t even know what he does to me! “Just remember,” I eventually force
myself to say, “don’t exchange ingredients by yourself, don’t take any offers,
don’t touch any of the guests in any way, not when you take money from them,
not when you hand them their drinks. We don’t want you proposing to anyone,
right?!” His eyes widen. “If anyone threatens you, tell them you belong to me,
Spike or William The Bloody, if they don’t back off, call out for the
security.” He looks to the floor. “Num-whelp?” “Yeah, just wondered, when we were on
patrol… you said your name should never fall from my lips “ Oh yeah, eyes fixed
on those again, keep on talking, like to see how they move, would love to feel
them on mine, would bite them and suck them in… “Spi-ike? Spiiiiikyyy?” “Yeah, see whelp, erm… “Bloody hell.
My hand shoots forward and I grab his chin and force him to look into my eyes. Golden
brown pools of insecurity and trust. “This is my world, my club. Here you can
be proud to belong to me. I rarely choose someone to be with me. You're under
my protection here. No one with half a brain cell will touch you without my
permission.” ~ Xander ~ Damn those blue eyes of his! A warm
mushy feeling crawls inside my body with every possessive word he utters and the
sincerity in his eyes makes my belly do funny things. Like when you eat too
much candy and then have a ride on the latest rollercoaster. Well, okay this is
better because I don’t think I will puke afterwards but… He chose me. I belong to him. He
protects me. The goofy grin is back. “Come now! Time is running! We
still have to…” Spike loses track when I lick my lips. His hand is still under
my chin and I love to feel it. I always liked to be touched. I could never get
enough of someone just touching me. But Spike? I make a step back, trying to
escape his closeness, not ready to deal with anything gayish and promptly lose
my balance when the backs of my knees collide with the bed. Acting on instinct
only I grab Spike’s hip to prevent my fall. ~ Spike ~ I see nummy retreat and am angry
for a moment. When I see him lose his balance, my arms close around his waist
and I just pull him against me. Oh yeah, that’s bloody good. I moan and let my
forehead drop to his. My eyes closed, I just breathe in his scent, just bathe
in his warmth. I feel him shudder and the hand on
my hip increases its pressure. His head moves in these little motions, rubbing
our noses together while our lips get closer and closer to each others. He is
panting and his breath is puffing against my lips in short harsh gasps. Bloody
hell… I so want him to kiss me. ~ Xander ~ What am I doing, what am I doing…
This is Spike! Handsome Spike. Cute, saving me Spike. His body to mine, his
arms around me, my hand on his prominent hip bone and the perfect height to
kiss. No dodging, no stretching. So easy to just close the distance and …kiss
him. (moan) cool smooth lips, barely touching but touching nonetheless and it’s
like the world stands still for a moment and if Spike wouldn’t hold me, I would
melt to the floor and … (shudders) ~ Spike ~ Oh bloody hell, boy. What are you
doing to me? You make me dizzy with need and… just to feel your heart pounding
so fast against my chest, as if you want to wake mine. I fasten my grip on him
and pull him closer to me, press my hard cock against… oh his answering
hardness. All I want is to lay you down on the bed and
cherish your body, worship it and make love to you and … Bloody hell. ~ Xander ~ What did I do wrong? Why is Spike
pulling back? No, not this time. No. Want more. Want… I follow his motion and
find his lips again, gently pulling his full bottom lip between mine. His lips
start to move against mine and I want to moan. Finally he reciprocates the
kiss! But then I hear the words he is saying, causing the movement of his lips.
“Not the right time, whelp. Xander, stop. Please.” God, why? Oh no. He doesn’t
want this. Doesn’t want me. I misinterpreted. He was just teasing me, he didn’t
mean it, just joking around. Oh god. Idiot, Harris! Idiot! “Spike. Damn, I thought… and I…
sorry. ‘K? Just sorry.” I look down, hands now hanging limply by my sides. Fucked
it up; congrats Harris. ~ Spike ~ Oh yes, what a way to give the boy
more confidence. But if we start this now, I won’t stop 'til I 've shagged
him stupid. “Xan, it’s…” not that I don’t want
to shag you, it’s “… just not the right time, we have some…” frigging
“…appointments we can’t miss. You are supposed to be downstairs in about two
minutes to get your link.” He doesn’t look up, he nods numbly and I could rip
my own head off for letting this happen now. Bloody fucking hell! “Come on.” I say and let go of him
and he seems to shrink even further into himself. ~ Xander ~ Yeah, link, job, apartment. Nothing
more, nothing less. Roomies. And can you believe that? I am …sad because Spike
doesn’t want me! Spike for god’s sake! I shudder disgusted with myself or is it
just the cold I suddenly feel after Spike’s arms are gone? No, don’t think
about it. Don’t think about it. I shrug the shudder off, squaring my shoulders.
Nope, this will not get me down. Will not distract me from my new job. I see
Spike’s slim hand coming up and jerk away with my whole body, brushing past him,
shoulder painfully connecting with his. “So where do I get this link?” I
nearly spit out, my voice harsher than I intended. ~ Spike ~ Fine! You want it this way, Harris?
Fine with me. Pity for you. “Kasrel, our warlock is downstairs,
waiting for you.” I strode past him again, grabbing my duster and putting it on
with the practiced move, finding comfort in the heavy leather. I’m already
searching for a cigarette before I'm out of the door. Harris follows me; I can
hear his heartbeat. ~ Xander ~ I observe Spike’s familiar pattern
of putting on his duster, it remembers me of Linus from Charlie Brown who can’t
live without his security blanket. I have to grin when I picture a little comic
Spike crying for his security duster. I follow Spike into a room near the office where this warlock already waits for us. Impatiently. “You’re late.” The old man whispers
and looks up, freaking me out with that blinded eye he has. I swallow hard.
What is he going to do with me? A wrinkly hand comes up to straighten back his
filthy brown hair and the other eye comes into view. It’s scaring me even more.
So cold and sharp it looks at me as if it could cut me into pieces and examine me
bit by bit. Maybe it does. I shudder involuntary. ~ Spike ~ I feel the whelp tense up, when he
comes face to ugly face with the warlock. Yeah, he isn’t the freshest one
anymore, but he's safe and trustworthy, working for us for years now. “Hey W!” I greet with my most
respectless attitude. Just coz he’s trustworthy I don’t have to trust him, do
I? “Spike!” He grits out, the eye with
the white iris rolling around without focus, panning the room like a security
camera. And that’s really nasty. “I need a link here for the new
boy.” I tell him and am slightly disturbed by the lack of protest from Xander. “Pet?” Kasrel asks and musters my
nummy appraisingly. “NO.” I snarl a little bit too
vehemently and he raises a bushy eyebrow at me. The white eye suddenly focusing
on me. Bugger off. “Ah, I see.” He eventually says after
long moments of silence. “Come here, boy.” He addresses Xan, his tone
surprisingly gentle. Like a moth drawn to light Xander closes the distance and
takes the offered hand. They stare at each other and some kind of understanding
seems to pass between them. “Ruby like wine but so much
sweeter, comes time you’ll find what you're seeking for.” He whispers to my
nummy. Cryptic fucking magic rot. “So, to whom should he be linked?”
The warlock looks at me questionably. I nod and go over to him. He takes one of
Xander’s hands and while the nummy looks at me still unsure, Kasrel has cut
into my nummy’s thumb. Hey! ~ Xander ~ Hey! Ouch! And the full aroma of my
own blood hits my nostrils. I feel my eyelids flutter closed for a second,
enveloped in the strong scent. This warlock mumbles unintelligible words and
lifts up my hand to Spike who takes it nearly greedily. And a second later I
know why. ~ Spike ~ I take nummy’s thumb deep into my
mouth, sucking it a little harder then necessary while I stare into his eyes.
They are clouding over, dazed with lust, my suction making his body spiral out
of control until… “Pick a safe word!” Kasrel interrupts not too gentle and Xander coughs out a strained “Slayer!” Two seconds later, my tongue
twirling around his thumb, even though the wound has already closed, the
warlock says “Done!” and Xander jerks his hand away. Pity. ~ Xander ~ God. No more sucking my thumb in
public or it’ll get messy! Damn Spike. God, he can move his tongue! Goosebumps
crawl over my body. “So what, still calling for the
slayer when you get in trouble, luv?” He mocks me. “Wouldn’t do to have the security
staff coming to save me, every time I’ll scream yours.” I reply, not sure,
where the sudden confidence comes from but laughing when I see Spike’s totally
stunned expression. Go Xan-man! Part Twelve ~ Debuts II ~ Spike ~ I'm at the whelp's side when he enters the club. I feel the
nervousness pouring off of him now that the short moment of cockiness is gone. "It'll all be okay." I tell him and he looks
doubtfully at me. "Sure will. You'll go over there and just do it. I'll be
around even if you don't see me. Don't touch anyone. I'm here when you have
your first break." With that said, I pull him close to me and press my
lips to his forehead, then shove him over in the direction of the bar and I am
gone. ~ Xander ~ Hey, erm… Spike… did you just kiss me on my forehead like
mommies do when they take their kiddies to school? I swallow hard. The place
where Spike's cool lips touched me seems to burn and I suppress the urge to rub
at it. Damn vampire. I look around and Spike is nowhere to be seen but I kinda
feel he is somewhere in the shadows, lurking and watching. I shiver. I take a few steps in the direction of the bar and Maerg waves
with three hands while throwing the shaker from one to the other two hands he
has. Oh my. I plaster a nervous half smile on my face and go over to them,
Raspla opens his mouth showing me about a million teeth and then continues to
work silently and quickly. Behind the bar, I have the first look at the crowd, not a lot of
people here and, as if Maerg read my mind, he indicates the clock. "Rush hour around 11. Short break before. Longer
break." He holds up four hands, showing erm… fifteen fingers and no
thumbs. I nod. "at 1 a.m. End of shift around 3 a.m. Alright?" He
jerks his head down to me, flashing a smile, eyes sparkling mischievously. "Yes, yes. Alright!" I answer, a bit too loudly, but
he looks pleased. "Good." He says and one hand grabs mine, shaking it as
if finishing off a deal, two other hands pet my shoulder and back in
reassurance just before he shoves me over to Raspla who welcomes me with a
sharp knife… what? At the last moment I turn away, avoiding getting it into my
belly. "Hey…" "Sorry." He says, showing the teeth-crowded mouth
again, which looks really scary from closer up, and turns the knife so I can
grab the handle. "Here." he says, and gives me a 10 pound net of lemons.
"Cut." I nod. "Like this." He shows me neatly cut slices.
"Yeah sure man, no problem! I just cut them. Slices and all. Yes I can do
that. I…" "And" he interrupts my embarrassing tirade.
"ssshh!" He makes a gesture, one finger against pouting lips. I nod.
Yes, yes. Shutting up now. And so I start cutting lemons. ~ Spike ~ I barely have time to see Xander being welcomed by Maerg before
one of the new guards, whose names I still don't know, tells me to go over to
Treck's office. Bloody hell. I knew it was inevitable but just right now?
Scowling I make my way over to the office, go in and close the door behind me. "Finally!" Treck exclaims and jumps in my reflexively
opening arms. "Finally I get you without that human!" "Xander." I tell him and try to stay unaffected by his
playful bites in my neck just over the collar of the duster. "Whatever." He dismisses my remark and I growl
lightly. He shivers and his legs come around my waist. When he arches his back
my hands slide down to prevent him from falling to the floor, fuck, two muscled,
warm buttocks in my hands. "Spike." He whispers in my ear. "I missed you.
Didn't you miss me at all?" No. Barely thought of you… is what comes to my mind first and that's good because
it gives me some reality back. I make my way over to the desk and seat Treck there. Reluctantly
he lets go of me and I sprawl myself out on one of the leather chairs in front
of his desk. "Spike… what… I don't understand." He says and I
nearly feel pity for him. I take a deep breath, arming myself for the coming
trouble. "The Initiative got me." I grit out so low Treck needs
some seconds to hear and understand it. Eventually his eyes widen comically by the implied
possibilities. "But… how… god Spike… what did these… " And bam, demon
in my lap again, groping all he can reach to make sure I'm whole. "… these
bastards. What did they do to you? And how did you get away… and the initiative
has been down for like two months and where have you been… why didn't you come
to me?" "I wasn't sure if it was safe. I could have had a tracer
somewhere … inside me. Actually had once. Didn't want to guide them here… too
dangerous. Went to the slayer once I realised… " Abruptly Treck pulls back
and stares at me, shaking his head frantically. "NO. Nononononono. Don't tell me they… they…" I look
down, fixing my eyes on his chest, seeking comfort in his embrace. Treck has
seen me down, that time when Dru threw me out. Nothing to hide here. And him
being an empath makes it futile to hide behind masks. "Yeah, they chipped me." I say and my voice is
cracking. It's not easy to admit it, not easy to confess bloody fucking
weakness. He rocks me back and forth in a tight embrace and his lips are pressed in my hair, against my temple, on my cheekbone, on my jaw and yes, fuck, I know where this journey ends and screw it, when his lips meet mine I just give in. Just for a moment, just to forget, for a few seconds. When his tongue seeks entry I grant it, let it in to caress
mine. I am passive in this kiss, just taking. Unusual for me. Hope Treck knows
… feels that this has nothing to do with lust or love, that this is just
comfort, just me needing some physical reassurance. Something that makes my
thoughts shut up and my heart free for a few moments. ~ Xander ~ Fuck it. Finally I am through with these millions of lemons. I
look down at my fingers. The tips are wrinkled from the lemon juice like when
you take a too-long bath and where I cut myself, whilst staring at one slightly
more exotic customer, it burns like hell tenfold. "Hey, Rasla, man. I have…" "RasPla." He
corrects me with his even voice. "Yes sorry, RasPla, I'm through with
the… " My voice fades away when he hands me another ten-pound-net of
lemons. "… FIRST net of one million lemons." I joke near despair. "Come on, Ras, he's practiced slicing lemons enough for
tonight. It's my turn now." Maerg's warm voice rumbles behind me and I can
hardly suppress the relieved sigh. Raspla and Maerg exchange this amused smile
over my head, like they did every time I cut myself. Not the
look-at-the-stupid-boy-smile more the oh-isn't-our-junior-cute-smile. Don't
know if I like it. Really. Spike is cute. When he is all sleepy or confused
with his big blue eyes and rumpled hair. Wonder what he's doing right now? ~ Spike ~ "Treckle…" I more moan than say into his satiny mouth.
I have nearly forgotten how gentle he is, how patiently and softly he kisses. I
have to stop this now. I really have to… ~ Xander ~ Maerg guides me over to his part of the bar and shows me a
list.. "Umah, you go and check these. Here…" he points at
words, some are confusing because they are not written in letters I know. "…is the name of the bottles, here the
quantity of what should be in store, here you write in the number of what is
really there. Count them carefully, the next order is based on this." With
that he opens a little door between the shelves of bottles and equipment and I
go into the middle of the bar, enter the core of it. There are ladders leading up- and downstairs and then there are
about one hundred boxes, on their outside is something written in a very poor
handwriting. I bet Raspla's because Maerg seems to be the head-bartender, and
most of them contain, according to the writing on the outside, four or six
bottles. Wonderful. Looking around again deciding where to start, I slump down to my
knees and just open the first box. Relieved I find out that the bottles are
labelled and that makes it easier to compare the names to the ones on my list.
The handwriting is really crappy. Who'd guess that that should read Vodka? Hm,
I look at the list again, and then try to calculate space and different kinds
of boxes, nod to myself. Yes, this will do. ~ Spike ~ "Bloody hell, Treck, stop!" I almost yell and struggle
to get up. I see the look of misery in Treck's eyes and fuck, I'm something
like sorry for him but I just can't give him what he wants. "I came here to talk business." I say, my voice colder
than I intended, Treckle flinches but it does the trick. "So what?" he spits back. Fine. Bloody fucking fine. "I can't hurt anything human, so keep them the fuck away
from me. No door duty for me and none of the other shite. It's embarrassing
enough most of them…" Nod of my head indicating the club. "…know
about me being chipped. I don't want them to witness William the Bloody going
down screaming in pain when he just so much as looks funny at a human.
'K?" I get a cig out and light it while I continue pacing. Bloody
soldiers. Bloody fucking chip. Treckle nods and is smart enough not to ask anymore questions. "So, show me the balance and sales of the last years?"
I smirk when he groans. See, I can still
be evil. Part Thirteen ~ Debuts III ~ Xander ~ "Hey Umah, are you through with the stuff there?"
Maerg asks and then his jaw seems to unhinge in pure shock. "Ras, get your
ass over here and look at this." I swallow hard, erm… did I do wrong? I
look up and down the neatly piled up boxes with their new content labels.
Raspla comes into the room too, narrow-eyed he takes in the stacks of boxes,
the pile of sorted out cardboard, the new inscriptions and then he laughs. Huh? "Well Umah, you did a good job. Really good. Looks really
good now. Wasn't that clean and sorted since… well since the club opened and
this room was unoccupied. Good job." Maerg pets my shoulder and I get
slowly to my feet, my knees cracking from the, I look at my watch, damn, hours
I knelt here. I give the list over to Maerg and out of the corner of my eye I
see Raspla blanch. Uh oh. I hide an amused smile. Maerg's furry eyebrows begin to climb up his wrinkled forehead.
The corners of his mouth twitch as if not sure whether to go down in distaste
or up in a smirk. I flex my shoulder blades to shake off the nasty crawling
feeling, yes, I noticed the boxes saying full, but weren't anymore and the lack
of several bottles in some of the boxes further down the stacks. I make a
mental note to never (!) provoke Maerg in anyway. I so don't want to be on his
bad side. "Umah," he calls me the tenth time this evening and I
wonder why. Is it some kind of insult in his native language, whatever that may
be? "you go out there and tell them to wait if they want anything now you
can't mix on your own or if they ask in a language you don't understand.
Croprie?" Erm, if that means 'agree', yes. So I nod. "But wha…" "I have to have a talk with our Raspla here." He says
with an overly bright smile and puts one arm around Raspla's shoulder, squeezing
him against his side. Raspla coughs. Uh oh. "K. Yes. Me out there. Now." And I am out of
the storage room and behind the bar. I need some seconds to get used to the
darker surroundings. Hm. There are not a lot of customers here. I mean it's
after 2 a.m. Rush hour is long over and the club is near closing time. There
was no special event tonight, nothing prolonging the normal business hours.
Forty minutes. And I am alone behind the bar. A demon bar. In the dark. Without
superpowers or slayer or witch or… "Hey!" Someone yells and I jump. Damn. Look
professional. Look as if you do this everyday, twenty-four-seven. Walk over
there, don't stumble too much. Oh nice, yellow eyes staring at me impatiently
out of an ugly vampface he has something suspiciously looking like a little
cross burned on his chin. I frown. "Hey! What can I bring you?" Evil
ugly vamp that will be staked in a few minutes by my friend, the slayer! I
smile at him. He looks at me unsure, sniffing the air, his nostrils widen and
narrow like a pig's snout. I shudder. "Blood." He eventually says, still uncertain if he
wants to be served by me. "Okay." I say and look around for… ah, yes
there… A pos, B neg, A neg, B pos, AB neg, 0 … "Erm… any
preferences?" I fake-smile at him. ~ Spike ~ Oh bloody hell yes! Unlife is good. "And it's all in that bank account?" I ask a beaming
Treck. He shakes his head. "Nope, Spike, that is just your ‘every day'
money to do what you want to with. The rest is divided in these two accounts."
He shows me more papers with even bigger numbers on it. "Bloody
hell!" "Yes." He smiles shyly, but proudly. "The
interest of these accounts goes on this account. Whenever you need more money in
this account, phone this or that number for the accounts and transfer money
over with your password. Password is this." "My password is your middle name?" I look at him
through lowered lashes, distaste only barely concealed. I hate it when people
get into my life without me wanting them in. "Oh sorry… yes… but you can change it, just call the banks
and change it… I was just making sure I wouldn't forget it all the time you
were gone." He gets this faraway, I-missed-you-so-much-look-again and
caresses my hand the thousandth time in the last, bloody hell, four and a half
hours. Damn, I missed the boy’s break. Fuck. I promised and I wasn't there. I growl at myself but Treck interprets it as growling at his
hand and he pulls it back as if burned. "I understand that you're not
comfortable with … contact for now. Will we celebrate your return?" He
asks when I am on my feet already, preparing to leave the office and find my
whelp. Hope he's not too angry… no, he wouldn't get angry just disappointed
that another person has forgotten him. Fuck. I can just picture these brown
kicked-puppy eyes. "Spike? Celebrate?" Treckle calls after me. "Yes, yes, whenever you like." I murmur and slam the
door. ~ Xander ~ "I don't know… what can I get for this?" The vamp stutters
whilst he scatters notes over the bar. Some are torn and bloody and they are
all one-dollar-notes. I look at him again, at the notes, at him… "What did
you do? Steal the collection?" I ask jokingly and he looks down, ashamed
then snarls at me. "Didn't know he was a priest, k? Just saw him counting
money and wanted it." He holds up his scorched hand. "Fucking
crosses." I use all my scoobie training to not burst out laughing. I can't
stop the grin though and avoid looking at the bedaddle vamp by counting the
money. "Hey master, can
give you some A pos." His eyes brighten and he grins at me wincing when the
skin on his chin is stretched. "Where did you get that?" I ask him while I fill his
glass. He laughs and starts explaining. "So I see this man in black with the box in his hand and I
think to myself, let's look what's in there. The man climbs in his car and
opens the box, counting the money and I think how nice, a meal and change too!
Good day for me, so I grab him and shake him and the cross that hangs on the
silver chain around his neck is flying through the air, coz you know I'm
shaking him, and it hits me right on the chin a few times and that's when he
gets it and starts burning me with his cross on my hand." I try to make impressed eyes and hand him over his drink.
"But you got him in the end?" He makes as if to get the drink but at
the last moment, when I have already let go of the glass, he pulls back to wave
his hand in a gesture of don't-ask. The glass falls down on the bar and all the
contents spill in my direction so I jump back and only get a bit on my hand. ~ Spike ~ Back into the club only twenty minutes from closing time. I look
around. Not a lot people left, thirty or fifty maybe… they all seem to be
laying low, not wanting any trouble but … bloody fucking hell… what is that
punk over there doing with MY boy? He is wildly gesticulating with his hands
and arms and now he is grabbing for my nummy and nummy is pulling back and
where the fuck are Maerg and Raspla and I nearly fly over the distance to the
bar and embed a stake deep in the vamps back. Fucker. ~ Xander ~ When I look up, my hand going absently to my mouth so I can lick
away the blood, I am stunned to see Spike angrily staring at me through a cloud
of dust. "What happened?" He barks, eyes flashing golden.
That's Spike, kill first, ask later. I lick the blood away. "Just spilt a drink!" I growl,
annoyed. "There was no need to dust a paying customer." He pointedly doesn't answer my question and looks at the clock
on the wall. "Your shift is over." He tells me, just when a slightly
rumpled Raspla with a grinning Maerg emerge from the storage room. "Took a bit longer than expected." Maerg slurs and
takes in the dust and the spilled blood on the counter. "Problems?" "No." Spike answers before I get the chance.
"Boy's shift's over." He nods curtly. Then gestures with his hand to
the bar's entry. "Come on, whelp." ~ Spike ~ Well, good, overreacted a bit but what the hell. One vamp less
won't hurt. And if he'd really touched the whelp I'd… I cock my head when the
first beats of the last song vibrate through the club. ~ Xander ~ I stop short before Spike and look at him. He is practically
glowing. I haven't seen him this confident and proud ~ this sexy ~ since the
night in the high school where Deadboy offered me to him. Ooooh, this gives me
mushy feelings now. I giggle and Spike looks at me strangely then: "Wanna
dance?" "Huh?" He rolls his eyes annoyed. "Music – dance floor –
moving?" An eyebrow cocked, waiting. "Dancing?" I squeak. Part Fourteen ~ Debuts IV ~ Spike ~ Oh come on whelp, this is not sooo hard. Bloody hell. "Yes, dancing. Want to?" "With you?" He asks, eyes going wide. I grind my
teeth, getting angrier by the second. Every bint and bloke would beg me for my
attention and he… I shrug. "No, … with the hot bint over there." I snarl and nod
to somewhere behind him. ~ Xander ~ I make the mistake of turning around and looking where he
pointed. Of course there is no girl. When I turn to him again, Spike has his
back to me, going away. I run after him, grab his shoulder and make him stop
and turn around to me. "What?" he snarls in my face. "Spike, I am sorry, k? I am just not used to … the guy
thing." And he starts to laugh. Really loud. I feel like the biggest idiot
on this planet. Why. Is. He. Laughing? Only a few days back and I wouldn't even have thought about a
guy that way. He might be sure of himself, with his hundred years of experience
and the non-existent morals. I'm just human. Damnit. I had two short
experiences with women. One wanting to kill me afterwards, and the other discussing
the chemical consistency of body fluids. And ewww. ~ Spike ~ When I see his hurt-embarrassed-confused eyes I stop laughing
immediately. Doesn't do good to get the whelp down with things he can't know,
does it? I lean forward, one arm around his shoulder and one hand resting
on his sharp hip bone and whisper in his ear, as huskily as I am able to. "I am a Master vampire, pet. Everybody in this club knows
there are just two reasons for me to keep a human around. Either to eat him or
to fuck him. You're not dead so there's only one conclusion. All these people
here are sure I'm shagging you ‘til you're sore, pet." I take a shuddering
breath, for effect of course, not coz the boy’s getting to me, with his heat
and pounding heartbeat. "So, you're still refusing to dance?" ~ Xander ~ GAAAAAAH! MegaGAH! All the people here know that… but he isn't… not
yet… and GAH! I never… god, how he whispers in my ear… sounding rough and needy
and the dirty words are so doing it for me… My cock is sooo hard, it's painful.
Over all the other scents, I can smell him, the lingering traces of smoke,
booze, leather. I want to touch, lick, suck, bite him. "Xander??" he purrs. I'm back to reality with a
start. People or better demons of all sorts are standing around us, staring at
us. "Xander?" "What?" I ask distracted by the audience. "Xander, you're leaking pheromones all over this place and
if you don't dance with me now, demonstrating my ownership of you, I can't
guarantee you that I can stop them all from ravishing you!" ~ Spike ~ Okay… that's a lie, nobody would touch him, but I'm really
satisfied when his eyes go wide with fear and disbelief and his arms come
around my waist. My eyes are nearly rolling back when his body makes contact
with mine, chest to thigh. I drown in his scents of arousal and confusion. So
sweet. "You're like a drug, pet." I take a deep breath from
his collarbone, absorbing the smell of one sweet Xander. ~ Xander ~ Oh fuck… what is he doing… oh… A song starts, one I don't recognize, it has a delicious slow,
sensual rhythm, a dark, cracking, man's voice… "Pig piggy pig pig…"
Oh fuck. Spike locks eyes with me and grabs my hips, pulling me hard
against him. My hard cock meeting his. I moan and let my head fall back, baring
my throat. Seconds later, Spike's cool
mouth latches onto my pulse point, sucking hard and I buck into him, arching my
back. His hands slide down and around, cupping my ass cheeks and rubbing me
against him, never losing the rhythm of the song. Our bodies fit together
perfectly, and needy, I press against him. Closer… need to be closer. Moaning
again when he makes another of his mind-numbing hip rolls. I bite down on my
tongue, hard, nearly drawing blood to keep from coming right here and now. Suddenly he stops, one of his hands goes up between my shoulder
blades, pressing my chest to his, keeping me still. He murmurs something
against my neck I can't make out. ~ Spike ~ Fuck, he's so responsive. "Xander, pet. You have to breathe,
pet." I keep him still against me. "We don't want you to pass out, do
we? Pet? Breathe pet." ~ Xander ~ I open my eyes and the room is dizzy. Or I am. I don't know. "Breathe pet!" I hear Spike say, nuzzling in my neck
still with these silken cool lips. "Can't!" I gasp. "Come on luv, take a deep breath for me, will you?" Nothing can stop me now and I don't care anymore… The room slows down its spinning and I get the memory of how to
breathe back. I take shuddering breaths and Spike begins to move again, more
carefully now, and I feel like liquid in his arms, ready to melt to the
floor. He still makes these little hip rolls
and thrusts against my swollen member but not so harshly anymore. Nevertheless
they get my fantasy to spiral out of control. Eventually the song ends but I don't let go. His body feels too
good against mine. I think I'm high on Spike or the lack of air is still making
my knees wobbly. ~ Spike ~ "Song is over, pet." I say and take a step back. He
follows my step, clings to me. Feels really good, this boy against me. Could
get used to it. "Upstairs?" I whisper in his ear. "What upstairs?" He answers still out of breath. Oh
yeah, boy. You've got a lot to learn. Guess who volunteers to teach you? I
smirk and turn him in my arms, press my cock against his ass. "Pet, see,
over there… it's the exit. We go there now. Then upstairs to our flat,
alright?" I bite a bit hard in his shoulder and his hips snap back against
me, grinding my hardness in his cleft. I moan. Oh bloody hell. I shove him
forwards. Wait ‘til we're upstairs, pet. I don't let go of him while I guide
him through the other demons and guards. Obviously for everybody showing off my
property. My boy. ~ Xander ~ Should I worry because of Spike’s possessive behaviour? I decide
no. It feels good to have him care enough to protect me. The other demons
around us look envious… at Spike and isn't that crazy? Oh, he loosens his grip
and lets go of me. The last few minutes I thought he would crush my arm. Like
he was afraid to lose me… Yeah, looks like madness is contagious… Get a grip,
Harris. “Go ahead, whelp.” he says and gives me a little shove. Ah the
stairs! Alright, too narrow to go side by side. No prob. When we nearly reach the last step, Spike suddenly pushes past
me and I can see the reason why: Treckle waits in front of our door with a
bottle of expensive whiskey in his hand. He grins, what must be his most
seductive and charming smile. I miss a step and would have fallen, if Spike hadn’t steadied me
with an arm around my waist – which is still there. Treckle’s eyes flash a
bright orange for a blink. Uh oh. ~ Spike ~ Fuck, what is wrong with Treck? What's he doing here? Fuck, only my reflexes have saved the boy from a nice rolling
down the stairs. I can’t believe he's that easy! A nice smile from a delicious
demon and Xanderbrain #1 leaves the house. And why isn’t that working when I
try it? Thought we were past this. If he wants to be with Treck, he
can’t stay with me. Easy. “Hey you,” Treckle
purrs and locks his eyes to mine. Erm… “I thought you would like to
have a little ‘coming home’ party?” Huh? Me? Oh Fuck. Stirring in my trousers.
Swallow. ~ Xander ~ They have locked gazes some time ago and ignore me completely.
Fine. The muscles of my back tense up caused by the sly tone of voice Treckle
uses. Spike’s hand clamps down on my shoulder. Uh oh. “Nice idea, but I'm beat. Xander too. Was a long day.” Spike
objects finally. Treck’s hand which doesn’t hold the bottle clenches into a fist. I have to hold back a snicker. My Spike can kill him in less
than a heartbeat with a hand bound and closed eyes. Hah. Nevertheless I try to calm the mood: “We can do this party thing
tomorrow if you like…” “You’re not invited.” Treckle hisses at me. OUCH! Spike growls, takes a step towards Treckle. And the blue haired man with the orange eyes starts laughing
at Spike! Spike pushes the smaller demon out of the way and shoves me into
the apartment. I stay in the door jamb, not letting Spike close the door. If
this empath demon tries something, I’ll tear it apart with my own hands!
~ Spike ~ “You are ridiculous, Spikey!” Treckle says, with so much venom
in his voice it must be choking him. “Am I?” Cocked eyebrow, waiting. Wish Harris would close the
door. ~ Xander ~ I can’t get over the feeling that this is all my fault. I feel
like I split up a couple. “Let’s talk about this tomorrow. You’re all worked up… “ I try
again to resolve the tension. “Xander’s right. I’ll come to your office tomorrow and we…” “God!” exaggerated cry, eyes rolling. “He's put you on a leash!”
Laughing again. Spike grits his teeth, a jaw muscle jumping. “What commands
have you learned yet, puppy vampire? Sit, stay silent, defend the human?”
Shaking his head sadly, he turns away as if to go. “You are a MASTER VAMPIRE, Spike!
You don’t submit to a fucking HUMAN!” I see Spike flinch a little, but he stays
silent. He doesn’t want to lash out at Treckle. I understand, but I am thirsty
for violence. What is this Treckle thing? Nothing but skin, bones and blood. A
lot of blood actually. I want to see it splatter on the wall. “Kill him, Spike. Rip his head off. Tear his throat open. Make
him bleed… “ I whisper, just loud enough for Vampire hearing to pick it up. “Do it for me Spike! Please. Paint the walls with his blood!” ~ Spike ~ What the hell…? I turn to the whelp and see this look in his
eyes. Can humans have this bloodthirsty gaze? Thought only vampires could look
like this… “Xander, you alright?” I grab his shoulders, and want him to
focus but his eyes are fixed on Treckle’s, who pales noticeably. “Yeah,” he answers in a breathy moan that makes my knees weak.
“will be…” And he smirks in a very cruel, hard way. An Angelus-y kind of smirk
that nearly makes me shiver. Finally his gaze drifts to my eyes. “If you don’t do it,” He
licks his lips sloooowly. “I will.” And the smirk again. ~ Xander ~ In less than a second I register the door slamming shut and
Spike shakes me viciously. “Snap out of it, pet!” I use all my weight to jump at Spike and
throw him down. He yelps, surprised and tries to get away. I tackle him down.
He turns the tables and I’m crushed face forward to the floor, Spike’s hand
protecting my face from making a collision with said floor but his body presses
me down. “Spike?” He lets up the pressure and I take the advantage, grab his arm
and sink my teeth into his flesh, as deep as I can. Spike cries out in pain. That’s what brings me back from wherever I was. I drop his arm and scramble to my feet. Tears are running down
my cheeks when I hurry to the bathroom. “Ohgodohgodohgodiamsorryiamsoorysorrysosorry.” The bathroom door clicks shut behind me and I turn the lock. The last thing I see is Spike sitting on the floor, looking at
me hurt and confused, holding his bleeding forearm with his other hand. What have I done? The End
The Silent Urge Series is
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