Dear Ate Gigi,
Hello!
I just visited mommy's webpage that you created. Sis, you did a remarkable job! I know that it takes a lot of courage and emotional drive to design such a webpage in memory of mommy.
I need not say it but I was teary eyed as I was clicking the links and browsing through the pictures and reading your thoughts about mommy. I, myself, have thoughts of her - the time that I received the text message from tia Rosie informing me of the result of the biopsy; the time that I travelled from Isabela to Los Banos (a total of 12 long and painful hours) to see her and be with her, I thought, perhaps during her last days; the time when mommy received me and asked why I came home (I said I have to follow up some papers at UPLB); the day when I accompanied mommy to the hospital and saw how devastated she was when the doctor broke the news that she has a malignancy; the time when I accompanied her to another hospital to consult with an oncologist (Dr. Warren) and know her treatment options; the time when I, together with tia Lourdes and tia Nene, accompanied her to Chinese Gen. Hospital to undergo mastectomy; the days when I stayed and slept beside her in Cabuyao while recuperating from her operation; the countless times when I accompanied her to Manila for her regular check-ups; the time when mommy had her 2 sessions of chemotheraphy; the 7 days that I accompanied her to undergo radiotheraphy at Makati Med; the times when I and Kuya Noel had to consult with Dr. Galang for an alternative theraphy; the times in between when, from Nueva Ecija, I frequently called and sent text messages to tia Nene and tia Lourdes to check mommy's condition; the fateful day when I and tia Nene rushed mommy to Chinese Gen Hospital because of her breathing problem brought about by (as we learned later) liver damage (prior to taking her to the hospital, she told me "Anak, bahala ka na sa mga kapatid mo"); and her last moments with us in the hospital.
I am a helpless witness to all those dark moments and pain that mommy suffered. All of it lingers in my mind. Yes, ate Gigi, I am still coping to this very moment. What comforts me is that within me, I assure myself that somehow, "bumawi" ako ng konti sa pagmamahal at pag-aalaga na ibinigay ng mommy sa atin all these years when I spent with her those last precious days of her life. It's hard to lose someone who was a big part of your life. But I know, each one of us, have shown her how grateful we were for her love and kindness. And I know she treasured all of it. She made a promise to me, Ate Gigi, on her death bed, that she will continue to guide all of us even when she finally joins her Maker. That promise keeps me moving on with my life. I hope it does the same to you and to Daddy, kuya Noel, and Romel. Mommy's love and memory will always be in our hearts. She is inside us. It is her legacy of unselfish love. Such thought will never die. Let us live our lives full of new hope and brighter tomorrow, in honor of mommy. Within us, mommy will live forever!
There you are, sis. My thoughts, straight from the heart.
Hello to Bess and Faye. Take care and God Bless us all!
ERIC :)
(Mar. 4, 2002)
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