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Johnny C's Theorem of "CLOSE ENOUGH"




Did you ever do something so half-assed that you got in trouble for it? Well, I have devised a theory that will get the job done, but in half the time. I like to call it Johnny C's "Close Enough Theorem." It's very simple to learn and even easier to understand. I took the concept of telling time and applied it to EVERYTHING else.

Here is an example: Let's say the current time is 4:19pm. If someone asks you what the time is and you say "4:19pm", you're stupid. Everyone knows that you round up in such a situation. Therefore, the time would be 4:20pm (No pun intended. Ironically enough, that really is the time right now.).

My theorem is simply this. I was in my Chemistry lab last Tuesday and Ryan and myself were doing an experiment which required precise measurements and time allocations. Strangly enough, I didn't feel like doing all that. To make a long story short, I began to take every number in the lab and turn it into a time. For example "Add 14ml NaOH." I would take 14ml, say to myself "The time is X:14...that would mean round up... the time is X:15..." Add 15ml NaOH.

Now this simple theory works for everything you might feel like doing half-assed. If the manual says to heat for 6 minutes, but you're only at 5 minutes, hell, it's close enough. After all, would you say "the time is 4:06" or would you say "the time is 5 after four"? Make the decision for yourself, but just remember, my lab DID end in the same result as everyone else. And even if it didn't, I'm sure it was close!


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