What the hell?

My God, am I on speed? So tired, yet hyper an my eyes feel like their gonna bleed. Come on, now tell me what I need, sedatives sound real good to me. I look shiny and new, like the beautiful few, but has the end come for the old me when I said at that moment, " I love you"? Look up at the sky, I see nothing but ceiling blocks, so dry and crusty, that a piece falls in my eye. I haven't eaten in days, yet my weight remains the same, an my life's so fucked that I don't care if I get laid or die. What is death, its nothing more then the end of the beginning, but the beginning of a new end. Still so much life to be lived after I die. But who says im alive? you call this a life that I live? If this is life, can death be more boring then a plain piece of rye? Turn me upside down and sideways, maybe you'll jar my brain free from this brain freeze that your cold words gave me. I feel their words, hear their vibes, "Fuck you all, one day all yal will worship me" Im destined for greatness, as long as i remain slick. My brain's slowin down but still quick. What the hell is this all about? Less meaning then life, but it has this certain spice that makes you want to scream all night. So with one more gentle whisper, and one big yell. im ending this here, THIS POEM IS FUCKED