| Lib-prechan and Peej O'Schmack ... by Libbie |
| /Me places the finishing touches of a painted shamrock on me cheek, facial that is, and peers into the mirror ahead o'me. "Aye! Tis a wearin' o'da green fae sure!" *chuckle* Now, the only real test was to get Sistah-Peej to also dress in green, Irish style.
It's not that my sistah-Peej would nae dress in green, it's just that what I had in mind may do one of two things: A) She likes the idea and we may just accomplish a mission out of the deal, or B) she tosses me into the file cabinet drawer and locks it *lips to one side as /me draws the outline of
yet another shamrock on me cheek, facial that is*. /Me coloUrs in the last of the green shading, and stands back from the mirror dangling at an odd angle in the Press Room's restroom facilities, /me also tilts. "A fine job ye done lass, naow onto Sistah~Peej..." /me exits the commode and looks into a large carton o'goodies. From within is of course Peej's "costume" and an assortment of stealth equipment of the hottest variety.. er... borrowed.. yeah.. borrowed... Notepads, pencils of varying lengths, and a two-way communication device so's we can communicate to each other stealth like during our sneakage and noteage perusals. This particular assignment also carries a raft o' Kodak picture takin' devices. /Me moves the box closer to the Press Room door, stops to hug said door...*insert Munchkin voice here*.. "There's no place like home.. no place like home..." *chuckle* /Me opens the door a wee bit, peeks inside, notes the usual flair of the room, and Peej at her desk, feet up, music filling the area around her as she slowly files - her nails not the files that should have been in the cabinet - her nails! *wink* Nah who cares, the more files in the cabinet, the less room I have for my blankie. /Me knows the jig is up when she gets a load of my costume... /Me coughs, Peej files, /me coughs twice, Peej blows on nails, /me hacks, Peej extends her arm and looks at her handiwork, /me dang near coughs up a lung, Peej looks to the door and smiles. /Me notes that Peej squints a bit as she tries to figure out what is on me face as only it protrudes through the opening in the doorway. "Lib! I was wondering where you went to! /Me smiles, "Well, Sistah~Peej, as you know tis my responsibility for this 'ere Press Room, and thus far my dearest heart, you've been a tremendous help, an asset to this paper, a font of information, a.. Peej stops me in mid-sentence, "Quit with the buttah-erin' up Libs, and just get to the point, and why do I have this feeling that you're buttah-erin' me up for a reason?" Peej lofts a brow, "and what the hell is on your face?" /Me grins, winks, "aye lass I'm gittin' to that thar item in a momento!" /Me flings open the Press Room door the rest of the way, and LEAPS, and BOUNDS into the room in a flurry of green! Pirouettes a few times as the curled end of me cap fwaps meself in me nose with the jingle bell on it's end. Peej moves her feet like lightning off of her desk, hand to her (ample) boooosoooms as heart palpatations make her jaw drop... Afore Peej stands one LIBprechan, dressed in green from head to foot. Peej does an up and down visual of green curled-back-pointy shoes, green leotards, green skirt, green top and vest, and green hat that just didn't seem to fit the bill, looked more like an elf hat really, then Peej gives herself a mental shake, what in the hell am I doing, she thinks, this can be noooo good, that little leprechan is up to nae dang good! There I go again, she thinks, I said NAE! aarrrgggghhh... *meanwhile me is bouncin' about trying to look carefree and crafty, interjecting sneaky and stealth like manoevers of pot o'gold (which is me duct tape dispenser).. /Me looks at Peej, notes the flashes of inner thought cross her face... "Sistah~Peej, when was the last time we went on assignment together? hmmmmmm?" *winks at her repeatedly, then sets the duct tape dispenser atop the mountain of files atop her desk, and fwaps over to Peej's desk, jaunty cap jingling all the way. "Ohhhh NOOOO! you are not going to get me to go on this mission Sistah~Libb, 'cause NOOO way I'm gonna dress up.. and.. ". /Me just shakes me head, jingle bell again fwaps about. /Me pulls the folded arms, leaning on the desk thang, should work... doesn't work, Peej looks like she's about to mangle her VooDoo doll, this week resembling... "Oh come on! It will be fun! Who'll really recognize us? huh? I mean we can sneak into 30s2, and take a sheeet load of notes and be outta there before them thar palski's are onto us! It's a sure fire desguise! It's St. Patrick's Day after all, and there will be lots of costumes out and about! *insert sing-song voice here* Come, on I even brought you a special "Schmackin' Stick" holster.. er... holder!" *winks, grins* "Besides which, we need the scoop!" More winks of encouragement Peej looks at Libb, "I get to bring my Schmackin' Stick?" /Me nods vigoUrously! "So, the premise is to go in there, in desguise and take notes, right?" /Me again nods vigoUrously, and Peej stands, grabs the end of me hat and yanks off the jingle bell, tossing it behind her, to which it lands with a "PLOORP" in Squiggy's aquarium. "This better be an okay costume Libbs!" /Me chuckles and heads to the door and out, then returns pushing a the box of aformentioned paraphenalia. Peej moves to stand in the space between the desks and with arms folded across her (ample) booosoooms, and awaits Libb's unpacking. /Me pushes the carton to the middle of the area as well, and with a "Vanna White" flourish, opens the box. As I begin to take out items I describe them to Peej, hand them to her and she sets them atop whatever space she can find on either desk. "Okay so, I understand the stealth equipment, notepads and such, now git onto the costume already!" Peej taps her foot. /Me just smiles and bends to the bottom of the box, straightens to reveal another green costume resembling that of Robin of The Hood... "See, it's great! I mean I usually stea... borrow things that have to be fixed, but these here are prime merchandise lass!" /Me hands Peej the tunic, digs in the box a bit more, straightens to hand her the same sort of shoe~age, and green leotards too, a belt and a jaunty cap with a very, very, very long ostrich feather sticking out of it. Her "fake" ID card "PeejO'Schmack" written on it, Libbie flashes her own "Libprechan" ID, "they'll never guess it's us!". Peej looks at the items, "I don't get paid enough for this chit Libbie!" /Me just smiles, "There is a bonus! And no, not the stuff I have to fork over to Blabby, she's.. she's.. well.. she's Blabby after all! This here is green BEER, as you know if we pass this around da room we may get a few gigglin' and tellin' us more item type thangs for the paper! I myself will be partaking of green tea, as you know beer has detremental effects on me..". Peej nods, "Yeah and so does green tea.. LOO wise." "See! yer talkin' like a bonny wee lass already!" Peej groans.."Okay, let me get this crap on, I'll be right back. Whilst Peej is assembling her costume-age, Libbie enjoyes yet another carafe o'coffee.."ahhhhh.. nectar of the gods!". Peej returns, dressed in her regalia, a disgruntled look on her face, but a gleam in her eye that the sistah's know is one of mischief, fun, laughter and creative scoop-age! Peej also fwaps to the center of the office, /Me claps with delight at seeing ma sistah decked out! "Well Faith and some "B" word, don't you look spiffy!!" Peejs "hrumphs!" So, me scoots over to me desk, rumages and finds a handled mirror, turns and moves the mirror quick like this way and that way to have Peej view herself. "Quit moving the mirror so fast!" Peej takes Libbie's hands and moves them to where she can view her head in the mirror. /Me notes, "You look maaaahvellous dahhhlin'". Peej lofts a brow in my direction, as she tries to adjust the ostrich feather and "pfffftttsss" it away from her brow. /Me nods, and hands Peej her Schmackin' Stick, "stick yer stick into the belt and people will think it's a shaleighleeee, shaleeeghielee, one of them thar Irish walkin' sticks." Peej does said manoever with Schmackin' Stick, and squares her shoulders. They both know the ritual, they salute each other and turn, fwapping toward the Press Room door. "Ya got the Plymouth Libbs?" "Yeppers, she's runnin' smooth as silk, only a few grumbles." "Okay, good, so we keep our eyes peeled huh?" "Yeth, and make notes o'course, plus this here two-way-communicatin' thang will help us to talk to each other stealth-like if'n we need to discuss a particular scoopage." "Gottcha!" and as Peej inserts the earphone into her sensitive ears, they continue out to the parking lot... "Yer gonna need to practice some Irish words with me Sistah~Peej, we'll do so on the drive over, kay?" "Okeees!" *both giggle and climb into Libbie's '79 Plymouth Volare... "Now, repeat after me.. 'Aye'". "Aye". "Potato". "Potato". "Guiness". "Guiness". "Patti O'Furniture".... The Plymouth coughs smoke rings out her exhaust as the pair o'green gals head towards Acrophobia Avenue and the 30s2 room... |
| Snips n' Nails n' Puppies? ...By Peej... |
| LIBS!! LIBS!! C’mere… HURRY! What is is me sissstah? Get me the ‘kit’…… FAST! Libbie runs in circles around the pressroom trying to recall where she last saw the survival kit. OMG! Peejie! I can’t find it…. Oh lordy….. lordy.. lordy…lordy. Hold on sisstah Peej! I’ll find it! Peej can be heard throughout the office whimpering and cursing in a low tone. *&&^%.. and ***^^…. Why me? *&$%^ &^$^ OH %@$*!!!!!!!!! Libbie yells from under a pile of papers in the corner. I GOT IT!! I GOT IT!!! Libbie rushes to Peej’s side. Oh Libs! Thank God! Hurry… Open it! Libbie quickly opens the kit and starts to fumble around inside it nervously. What Peejie? What do you need? OMG sisstah… I don’t know what to do!! Here Libs… hold some pressure down right here. Don’t let go and DON’T move!! Libbies takes hold of the situation and presses down hard. OUCH! Libs……. Take it easy!! I’m skeered Peejie, this is making me nervous. Oh dear… Oh me… Oh my… Peej reaches with one hand into the kit and feels around till she finds what she is looking for. GOT IT! Peej yells out… A big smile crosses Libbie’s face as she breaths a sigh of relief. Peej pulls out a small tube of nail glue and brings it to her broken nail. Ok Libs, now hold it still. This shouldn’t take much. I think I caught it before we had a major disaster on our hands. Peej applies a thin layer of glue to the crack in her nail. Libbie stands back watching intently. Libs? Yes sissstah? File! Stat!…. File!… repeats Libbie as she hands Peej her industrial size sandpaper grade nail file in neon green. Peej carefully starts to smooth the glued area on her index finger nail. Slowly and meticulously buffing it to a smooth non-detectable flaw. Libbie flops down in the chair next to Peej’s desk releasing a puff of air from between her lips and blowing her bangs up with relief. That was a close one Peejers! I thought it was a goner for sure! Me too Libs.. Me too! The two girls take a few more deep breaths trying to steady themselves after an almost traumatic ordeal. Libbie gets up and starts back to her desk. Hey Libs?! What? You ok Peej? Another nail? Libbie asks… No.. No.. I’m fine! But thanks for asking! Peej exclaims. I was wondering if you noticed anything funny about the file cabinet drawers this morning when you came in. No I didn’t Peejies, what’s up? I don’t know, maybe I am just imagining things. But when I came in a few of them were partially open. Were you working late last night Libs? Not me! MSR doesn’t pay me enough to work late Peejers…. *frown* I loves the guy sissstah, but I aint putting in no more overtime after the last time. He done promised me some time off. Wanted to take me a vacation to Hornswaggle Wyoming to visit that new Moth Museum they got there. Moths? You Libbie? Oh yes sissstah! I’m trying to get over this nasty fear of them. And I joined that there M. A. M.A.? What the heck is that Libs? Oh didn’t I tell you Peejie? It’s Moth’s Anonymous! They have this here 12 step program to get you over yer fear of moths! Peej burst out laughing and laughs herself into a snort! You think that’s funny sissstah? Oh.. Ummm..no, not at all Libbie! Not at all. You keep up the good work. Before you know it, you will have your own moth farm. Peej smiles… Peej then gets up and heads to the bathroom to finish off her laugh.. Libbie sits behind her desk and starts to shuffle through some piled up paperwork from the past few weeks when she hears a tap on the pressroom window… Looking up Libbie sees good old Dear Blabby pressing her nose up against the window… Blabby? Libs mutters as she gets up from her desk and heads to the window. Unlatching the window and opening it a crack, Blabby still pressed to the window falls forward and pops her head in… In her matronly voice Blabby addresses Libbie... Libbie, my sweet dear child, how are you darlin? Give Blabby some sugar girl! Libbie stretches to reach Blabby and gives her a peck on the cheek. Blabby, what are you doing here? Asks Libbie Oh.. I’m just out walking my puppies and showing them off. Says Blabby…. With a confused look on her face Libbie asks… I didn’t know you had any puppies, when did you get them Blabs? I got em last month. What do you think? Blabby asks as she puffs out her chest… OMG! Blabby!!!!! Libbie breaks out in a snicker-snort and slaps her knee! BLABBY you naughty old woman you! YOU DIDN’T?? I MOST CERTAINLY DID! Blabby spouts back…. A girl has to keep her figer long as she kin! *giggle* Well I’ll be…. Says Libbie. Blabby leans back into the window… Got any good scoop lately Libs? Anything on that young stud of a BritishBull? I always like hearing about him. He kin get an old woman’s motor going if ya know what I mean…. Blabby * winks * at Libbie. Actually I do.. Libbie says. He and his wife just had a new baby. Cute as can be too! Oh praise the Lord!! …. Blabby raises her hands in the air! Praise the Lord.. a beautiful new life brought into the world. He has been blessed, truly blessed. Libbie watches as Blabby sits back on the ground and gets a strange far away look in her eyes…. Blabby? You ok? Libbie asks…. Oh yes child, just thinking here. Hmmmm……. Thinking about what Blabs? Well… Blabby’s voice goes to a low whisper. Well if the wife just had a youngin then that means she will be out of commission so to say for a few weeks eh? Maybe I should give that young sexy man a call and pay him a little visit. I’m sure he could use the company, if you know what I mean. Libbie in a state of surprise at Blabby’s insinuation… BLABS!!!!!! Oh come on Libbie darling, you know how things are! You know those young virile men have needs. And Blabby’s got the cure girlfriend. I may be Blabby, but I ain’t shabby! Especially with my two new friends! Blabby lets out a very unsettling laugh…. Libbie just shudders at the thought of it all… Peej calls from the bathroom to Libbie……… Libs?? Blabbys laugh is cut short when she hears Peej calling…. Peej is here? Blabby asks? Oh shit! I better get out of here. She’s been looking for me for months. I still owe her some money from that last bet I lost to her in acro. She kicked my old sagging ass good. Blabby jumps up and disappears down the street… Libbie closes the window and heads to the bathroom door… To be continued.... |
