*The camera cuts to a roaming shot of the Millsop Community Center, in Weirton, West Virginia, as "Thunderkiss 69" by White Zombie plays in the background, and we see several thousand on hand for the show. We see various signs, reading "Storm Sold Out," "Bite Me Cannibal," and "Viva La Vega!" The camera pans to the entranceway, where EGWA Announce Team, consisting of Mike Rether and Clint White, start to the newsdesk. They sit down, pull on headphones, and White Zombie fades down.*
Mike: Fans, welcome to another edition of EGWA Monday Night! We've got a huge show for you this evening, with several key matches that will factor into next weekend's huge "Blood, Sweat, And Tears" card! This evening in action, we will-
*Suddenly, "The Zoo" by The Scorpions starts up, and the fans begin to boo wildly. From behind the curtain, Jade Diamond, and Lance Slade lead the way, Slade with the three titles that make up the Triple Entente title around his waist. Next, Cannibal, Bernard, Ferdinand, and Ace step out, who basically make up the security team. Finally, Xavier Region, Rian Palm, and "The Perfectionist" Will Storm come out, Storm with his World title over his shoulder. The fans begin to boo ever louder. They make thier way to the ring.*
Mike: You've got to believe, that is it weren't for Jade Diamond last week, we would've seen Hardcore Jay take home the World title.
*Storm grabs a mic. The boos reign down.*
Storm: Shut up!!!!
*They boo louder.*
Storm: I command each and everyone of you to show your respect for YOUR World Heavyweight Champion!!
*The Organization claps, as the fans boo ever louder.*
Storm: Now then, everyone knows that Will Storm is the legend killer. No one expected me to go into that ring at "King Of Death Matches" and win the World Title, however, I did so, and I did it by defeating Hall Of Famers like DRH, Hardcore Jay, and Hardcore Jones!! Last week, you all saw me beat Hardcore fairly and squarely in the center of the ring! I took out Ciarin Kade, making me the only man to ever beat him by myself! Face it, love me or hate me, I am YOUR Champion!!
*They boo louder.*
Storm: And, this Sunday, you will all see me charge into the "Blood Sweat And Tears" pay-per-view, and tear apart the "Hardcore Mastabater" Vincent Vega! He claims that the Death Match is his match, and that he would beat me beyond recognition!? Well, this is no longer a Death Match! This Sunday, we will meet in the first-ever "Rage In The Cage" Match, and only one of us can walk out of the Canter House with the World Title around our waists! Do you honestly believe that you can defeat the Organized World Champion!? Do you!? You are in for a huge surprise, my friend! This Sunday, The Perfectionist will do to you what he did to all the other legends: We will break you!
Palm: And, there is a whole lot of other show going on this Sunday! You will, of course, see the likes of Cam Furgeson and Vince Vega, the Majestic Makers Of Mayhem, taking on superior athletes in Jade Diamond and Lance Slade!? What is this? I mean, it's obviously a plot for DRH to once again screw the Organization out of their rightful place in the Main Event, however, this will not go on long! Palm is set to take back the power that I lost! DRH, fear me. I OWN you, boy. And, soon, I am going to come collecting.
Cannibal: It seems as if this idiot Genesis has been running around backstage, babbling about how I never should've won the World title, and the only reason he never beat me was cause of the office politics!? Man, this is something you're gonna regret! Why? Because, this Sunday, me, you, one more time! We are going to go at it again, and we will, once and for all, show the world who the king is!
Palm: Now then, what else do we have to address? The factor of NC-17. I may not be the President, however, I'll be damned if I'm going to let anything like what has transpired over the last two months happen again. Vega wins the "KODM" tournament? Jay gets a World title shot, despite being the worst worker in the company? Furgeson booked over Jade Diamond?? This is about to end, and, it's only going to end once I step up and take charge! So, that being said, if NC-17 interferes in any of their matches this Sunday, they will be FIRED!!!
*The fans reaction is insane. They boo wildly. Suddenly, "No More Tears" by Ozzy Osbourne starts up, and DRH steps out onto the rampway to a huge pop.*
DRH: Now then, Palm, as I sit backstage, and listen to your rambling, I begin to wonder to myself, is this guy still under the influence of the morphine they pumped into him after I nearly beat him to death!?!?
*Another enormous pop.*
DRH: Where do you get off thinking you have any sort of power? The fact of the matter is, there is one president, and that is me!!
Palm: Do you think so, Daniel? Do you truly believe this? You see, Dan, the fact is, I am still the OWNER of the EGWA, and this gives me the right to do whatever I damned- well like! And, heed my words, Dan...if anyone from NC-17 interferes in ANY match...you had better fear for more than you jobs.
*With that, "The Zoo" starts up again, and DRH walks off the stage. Palm and his Organization walk to the back, as the camera returns to the newsdesk.*
Mike: Well, what news! Palm is back in power, it seems, and, this Sunday, should any member of NC-17 interfere in any matches, they will be fired on the spot!
Clint: Thank God! This place needs to get more Organized, and Palm is just the man to do it!
Mike: You would think so. Anyway, fans, I understand that we're gonna have an interview with Genesis at this time. Let's go to the back!
*The switches to the back, where we see Richard Thorton standing a good ten feet away from Genesis, who is working on some cross-stitching.*
Richard: Uhhh...Genesis...what do you think of the "Loser Leaves Town Death Match" challenge laid out by Cannibal? Are you up for it?
Genesis: What do you think, Rithard? I'm always ready for a fight! This time, there will be no planned fightth or anything os the thort. I'm gonna beat up Cannibal, and then stick my tongue down hith throat!
Thorton: Now, earlier this weekend, you got into a little spat with EGWA Owner Rian Palm, because of the fact that you wanted out of your contract. Why do you want out of your contract?
Genesis: Well, Rithard, ithn't it obviouth? I'm the Main Event! I detherve to be World Champion! Palm never liked me, whith ith why I lotht the match with Cannibal for the title anyway!
Thorton: Well, what about the fact that you wanted to be in the Main Event, and claimed that you were ten times the worker Ciarin Kade could ever be.
Genesis: Of courth! I AM the main event! Just ask RJ Thompson! He calls me his "Anal Main Event!"
*Genesis begins to move closer to Richard, trying to touch his leg. Suddenly, Cannibal bursts into the room, a chair in hand. He smacks Genesis over the head, and then begins to stomp away on him. The camera cuts back to the arena.*
Clint: Beating up fags, eh? I didn't know we were in Texas!
Mike: I apologize for that one, folks. Anyway, fans, time for our first match of the evening! We're gonna see "The Ultimate Athlete" Sports Jones going against Pastor Mark Brian, in a battle between two men who were once the best of friends. As NEW fans know, PMB even ran the wedding service of Sport to his wife, Laureen. Well, now, PMB says that Jones has sold out! We'll see the first meeting between these two men tonight! Let's go to the ring!
*The house lights fade out, and "More Human Than Human" by White Zombie starts up. PMB makes his way to the ring, to a large pop. He rises to the middle turnbuckle, and then raises both arms into the air. The lights fade back up.*
*"Comfortably Numb" by Pink Floyd starts up, and "The Ultimate Athlete" Sport Jones starts towards the ring. He walks with his head held high, staring out over the crowd. He rolls in under the bottom rope, and then immediately runs at PMB. The bell ring.*
Mike: Here we go! The clash of the former friends and tag team partners! Jones starts off things with an overhead belly-to-belly suplex! PMB lands on his neck, and then slowly rolls out of the ring! He's trying to gather his thoughts, and now Jones in on the apron! Oh, a double axe handle from apron! Jones pulls up Brian, and then sends him into the guard railing! PMB flies over the railing into the crowd! This is turning extreme folks!
Clint: Both these men seem to feel that they were betrayed by the other! They're both looking to take the other OUT!!
Mike: Sport over the railing, and now he's going to PMB! Oh, a kick to the head of PMB!! We're one match into the evening, and these two are already giving us a wild brawl! Sport grabs PMB, and then sends him flying into a row of bleachers!! PMB's back bounces off of the bleachers!! Jones grabs him by his hair, and then begin to climb up the side of the bleachers!! Good lord, they're climbing up the side! Jonas delivers a kick to Mark Brian, and then looks to be letting him fall backwards! No, PMB ducks the kick, and now JONAS FALLS FACE-FIRST DOWN THE BLEACHER STEPS!!! GOOD GOD!!!
Clint: Brian goes down the stairs, and then grabs Jones! He whips him into a row of seats, and then grabs him again! They're brawling back towards the railing! Brian sends him over the railing, and then gets a chair!! PMB has a chair! He climbs over the railing, and then delivers a shot to the head of Sport! Sport goes down!! Brian tosses the chair aside, and then rolls Jonas into the ring!! PMB is back in, and he goes to the top rope!! Jonas is getting up, and PMB from the top with a double axe handle, but Jones reverses with a dropkick to the stomach!!! PMB goes down hard! Jonas is up again, and then pulls up Brian! He whips him into the ropes, and then catches him with a clothesline! Jonas now goes to the side, and then pulls apart Brian's legs, OH MY GOD!! Headbutt to the groin of Pastor Mark Brian!!
Mike: This is a bitter war! Jonas yanks PMB to his feet, and then whips him into the ropes again! He looks to be going for another clothesline, but Brian ducks! He flows under his arm, and then hits a superkick onto Jonas! Jonas is down! Mark Brian is on fire right now! He's off the ropes, and he hits a leg drop across the throat of Jones! Leg drop by PMB!
Clint: Mark Brian is hot right now! He's off the ropes again, and he hits an elbowdrop! Elbowdrop by PMB! He's back up, and he hits another elbowdrop! Mark Brian is, once again, on fire!
Mike: PMB pulls up Jones, and then sets him up for a vertical suplex, NO, HE DROPS HIM INTO A FISHERMAN'S SUPLEX!! WHAT A COMBO INTO A COVER...1...2...Kick out by PMB! PMB kicked out!!
Clint: You never caught it, however, Mark just used a version of one of Sport's own finishers, the Angler! Thank God himself I'm here, or nothing worthwhile would be said!
Mike: Yes, thank God indeed. We always need your moronic sense of humor.
Clint: At any rate, somehow or another, Jonas managed to kick out! Now, PMB is back up, and he shakes his head! He's going to the outside, and he's got that chair! He slides it under the ring ropes, and now he's back up top! Oh, a leg drop from the top to the back of Jones's head! Cover again...1....2....Kick out! Kick out by Sport Jones!
Mike: Mark has the chair, and now he hammers Sport across the back!! Hard shot to the back of Sport Jones! Mark Brian now takes the chair, and drives the head of it into Jones's spine! He's really going to town on Sport's back!! He sets the chair in the center of the ring, and then pulls up Jones! He sets him up, and then hits a sideslam onto the chair! Sideslam on the chair! Sport's in major trouble here! PMB pulls up Jones, and then sends him into the ropes! He catches him off the ropes, and then nails a powerslam into the center of the ring! Powerslam into the center of the ring!!
Clint: PMB is aflame right now!!! He's toasting Jones! PMB is up, and he gets Jones to his feet as well! He tucks his arm under, and then looks to be going for a front suplex onto the chair! If he hits that, this match will have to be over! No, Jones blocks! Brian tries again, and Jones with another block! Now, Jones reverses, and turns it INTO THE ANGLER ONTO THE CHAIR!! HE MIGHT HAVE PMB HERE...1.....2.....NO, A KICK OUT BY MARK BRIAN!!
Mike: How did he kick out!? PMB is in pain right now, though! Jones to his feet, and now he pulls up PMB! He sets him up, and then whips him into the ropes! He bounces off the ropes, and IT'S THE OPEN FIELD TACKLE!!! OPEN FIELD TACKLE!!! MARK BRIAN IS OUT!!!
Clint: If he covers, it's over...
Mike: No, Sport refuses to cover!! He rolls out of the ring, and then goes under the ring! He pulls out a table, and then slides it under the bottom rope!! He's back in, and now he sets the table in at the center of the ring!! He's got the table set up diagonally there!! Now, he grabs PMB to his feet, and backs him into the corner!! He ties up his arms, and then hits T-BONE SUPLEX THROUGH THAT DIAGONALLY-SET TABLE!!! GOOD LORD!!! MARK BRIAN MUST BE DEAD!!!
Clint: Thar MUST be IT!!! All he has to do is cover up PMB!! No, he doesn't!! He's calling out someone!! Here COMES ACE STARLING!!
*Ace grabs a table, and then slides it under the bottom rope to Sport.*
Mike: Good lord! Sport sets the table up in the corner of the ring, and then backs PMB into the corner! He sets him up, and it looks like he's gonna go for his Running Liger Bomb, which he's dubbed the Slam Dunk!! He's running for the table, BUT PMB TURNS IT INTO A DDT THROUGH THE TABLE!!!! GOOD GOD, GOOD GOD!!! Mark Brian has to have it put away now!!!
Clint: No, PMB isn't covering!! He's simply looking at Jones passed out on the mat!! Wait, Ace Starling is in the ring! He lays out PMB from behind!! Now, he rolls out of the ring, and then tosses a chair into the ring!! He pulls up Sport, who's awakening, and now Sport is up!! Ace backs into the corner, and he has the chair! Sport gets PMB into a full nelson, and Ace runs at Brian, NO, PMB DUCKS OUT OF THE WAY!!! ACE STARLING HITS SPORT JONES!!!
Mike: Mark Brian quickly clotheslines Ace to the outside, and then covers up Jones...1....2....3!!! Pastor Mark Brian has beaten his former best friend and tag team partner!!! PMB steals one from The Organization!!
*White Zombie's "More Human Than Human" starts up again, and PMB stands up in the center of the ring with his hands held high. Suddenly, Jade Diamond runs out from the back, and clotheslines PMB to the ground.*
Mike: Jade Diamond is out here, and now he's stomping away at PMB!! Sport is getting up, and he rolls under the ring! He brings out...A BARBED WIRE DOG COLLAR!!
Clint: Now, Jade boosts PMB onto the top rope! He takes the barbed wire dog collar, and then ties it around Brian's neck!! Now, Jade grabs the other end of the collar, and JERKS PMB OFF THE TOP ROPE!!! PMB JUST FELL INTO THE CENTER OF THE RING, AND HIS BECK IS BEING CARVED UP BY THE BARBED WIRE!!!
*"The Zoo" by The Scorpions starts up, as Jade and Jones walk to the back, leaving Mark Brian in the center of the ring a bloody mess. The camera cuts back to the newsdesk.*
Mike: Jade Diamond with a brutal attack on Pastor Mark Brian! He and Sport Jones just KO'ed the Good Pastor!
Clint: And, I must say, it couldn't have happened to a better person! That pious, self- righteous preacher deserved everything he got!
Mike: I honestly don't believe you said that. At any rate, fans, it's time for our first commercial! We'll be back with our second match of the evening right after this!
*The camera cuts to the back, where we see Chaos seated in a chair with the Crown Of Thorns title next to him.*
Chaos: Well, I see that I've gotta fight another match. The man who is undoubtabely the greatest COT champion ever is still forced to defend it. Well, fine. However, the fact is, you're all gonna see another insane match. The best worker in the EGWA is going to go in and crush Crimson once more. And, there is not one thing that anyone can do about it.
Crimson -VS- Chaos -VS- "The Hardcore Masta" Vincent Vega
MR: Well our next treat up for you is going to be for the Crown of Thorns Title in a "Triple Threat Death Match." And what a match this is going to be. Chaos, the current champion, will face off against Crimson in just about a week in a Highway to Hell match...unless Vincent Vega has something to do with that. You got to keep in mind, if the Hardcore Masta can pin one of these men, it will be Vega and Crimson, and boy would Vega have some work to cut out.
CW: Who cares about Vincent Vega, Mike? He's one of those NC-17 jerks preparing to be taken out by the Organization! He'll be lucky if he could escape on his feet once Storm is through with him!
MR: We'll see about that...anyway, let's get to the ring!
*"Whiplash" by Metallica hits the speakers, as the lights fade, and Crimson appears in the entranceway. He has a grin on his face, as he carries a sledge-hammer to the ring. He slides in, and awaits his opponents.*
*"Nookie" by Limp Bizkit hits the arena, as the fans rise to their feet to cheer the #1 contender for the World Title. Vincent Vega runs down the ramp, steel chair and all, and wastes no time. The two men start to brawl.*
MR: Oh, and these two men aren't going to waste anytime at all! Chaos isn't even here. There's a knee to the sternum by Vega, and the sledge-hammer has fallen out of the hands of the Evil Soul. Vega whips Crimson into the corner, oh my! There was a huge knee to the face, and Crimson's opportunity of celebrating early don't look too good right now Clint.
CW: Vega has no chance Michael! Vega now slides out of the ring, oh no, don't do it Vincent! He has Crimson's leg, and OUCH, his soft spot goes right into the pole, if he does have one of those. And I still have a question, where in the hell in Chaos?
*"Faith" by Limp Bizkit is heard throughout as Chaos runs down from the entrance. He has the Crown of Thorns title in his hand, and Vince's face meets right into it.*
MR: Oh, and Chaos has just drilled Vega's face in with that belt. That could hurt! Chaos is taking Crimson, and he slams his face into the steel steps. And Crimson is really looking hurt. Chaos is getting a steel chair. He swings, and he misses! There's a dropkick right into the face, steel chair along! That'll leave a mark! Vega is resting alongside the crowd...Crimson charges at him, and Vega slips him over into the front row! The two men are really battling it out!
CW: They're movin right through the crowd, and it looks like they're by the refreshment stand. We are looking at Chaos who slides into the ring, and he picks up the sledge-hammer! This could be bad news folks!
MR: We have a camera by the refreshments now, as Crimson and Vega are duking it out right by a Gatorade Stand! OW, now Vega with a low blow, which is legal in any sort of matchup in this extreme federation! Vega has Crimson's head, and slams it right into the stand. He picks up a Gatorade, AND HE SLAMS IT RIGHT IN THE FACE OF CRIMSON! Gatorade has just splattered everywhere! Vega begins to laugh, as he turns around, and is met with a sledge-hammer right into the stomach! That'll knock the wind out of you!
CW: It looks like Chaos has an advantage now, as he lifts the dazed Vega up, AND SMACKS HIM RIGHT BETWEEN THE EYES WITH THAT SLEDGE-HAMMER! HOLY GOD MIKE!
MR: Wait a minute, Chaos is gonna go for a cover, 1...2..HOLY GOD IN HEAVEN, CRIMSON JUST THREW THE GATORADE STAND ON TOP OF THE TWO WRESTLERS, AND THE COUNT WAS SCREWED! Chaos was that close to retaining his title, and now you might as well say he's unconsious, as it sure looks it!
CW: This is a top-notch match tonight, as EGWA is the only extreme fed that brings you these sorts of matches! No one compares with this business! And look at this, Crimson isn't going to go for a cover Mike, he wants more pain! He's picking up Vega, as The Hardcore Masta is fighting for his life, he is so weak, just like always! It looks like they're moving into a parking garage now!
MR: You're right, and it looks like Crimson found what he was looking for, a table. Now the fun action has begun! Crimson looks like he's setting him up for the Evil Image, BUT VEGA REVERSES IT WITH A FRANKENSTEINER RIGHT INTO THE CONCRETE! He's picking the confused Crimson up, and he hits the CHRIST AIR! Vega is going to have this thing won, all he has to do is cover him!
CW: Hold on a second, Vega has just been hit with a singapore cane out of nowhere and YES, it's The Perfectionist Will Storm. He's beating away on Vince, and he's going to be facing him later in the night! Will Storm is just pounding away on Vega, as Chaos has just been watching this whole thing!
MR: He has, and you could call that good strategy. Uh-oh, The Perfectionist is laying The Hardcore Masta flat out on the table. Oh no, don't tell me...Storm is climbing on top of a damn car, AND HE HITS THE BLISSFUL PERFECTION ON VINCE RIGHT THROUGH THAT CONCRETE! DENY RELIGION, DENY RELIGION!!!
Perfectionist: Hey Vince, maybe that'll rattle ya up a bit for later on in the night. See ya there Vincie-Poo, and I'll be able to put an end to you!
CW: Haha, Will Storm has just ruined the chances of Vincent Vega becoming the new Crown of Thorns champion, I love it! And now Storm is just walking away, as Chaos comes back in. He picks up Crimson, AND HITS THE LIGHTS OUT. He covers him: 1...2....3!!! Chaos has retained his title, and the Pay-Per-View hasn't changed one bit!
MR: It hasn't changed, but Chaos could thank the World Champion for still being lucky enough to hold that title. After all, if it wasn't for him, another title would be in the making for the NC-17.
CW: Who gives a damn about the NC-17! It's over, Chaos won, fair and square, and he's still the champ! You can't change it, and it's over! Vince had his shot, and he failed the opportunity! Now the Perfectionist is left to take out a waste of time in the EGWA, and he'll be able to achieve it at Blood, Sweat, and Tears!
*The camera cuts back to the newsdesk, where we see Mike and Clint again.*
Mike: Well folks, I guess we're gonna get right into our next match! No clean-up was required in the ring, and we're gonna get into it!
