SHEETZ

You’d expect that a business teacher would talk about the perennial success and solid financial position of this business. Oh, I know I should point out the vision of its founder and the consistency of its ability to “know what people want and give it to ‘em.” (Who said that? It sounds real good!) No, I am not going to do some “business thing” about Sheetz. Instead, I just want to mention some of my observations over the years.

            The first time I was ever in a Sheetz (the one near the school!) was in 1976, really, really late at night. As the designated driver of my group of cohorts, I remember a hamburger I bought at Sheetz that night. There were no MTOs at that time—just microwave food. Green frozen hamburgers that were made on the Mayflower nuked into a mushy 211 degree semi-solid in just three minutes! I remember thinking it would be nice to be able to enjoy this kind of quality cuisine in the middle of the night in my hometown someday. I’m sure Steve Sheetz must have been bursting with pride, saying “Boys, I think we’re on to something here!” (Again I have a quote, but don’t really know if he ever said it or not.)

            With such a successful product line that also included milk, bread, eggs, and emergency items like toilet paper for $7.50 a roll (Hey, when you gotta go, you gotta go!), Sheetz was destined to expand. And expand they did! They planned to be in all 52 states by  2006. (Ok, I made that part up.) And new products emerged, like the “egg-a-muffin” targeted at people who couldn’t say “egg mcmuffin.” Marketing to stupid people has turned out to be a great strategy for many businesses. The Clapper, Ginsu Knives, the Ronco Bald Spot Paint, Chia Pets, and Fox News have all been great successes. (Just kidding about Fox; I promised Leslie I wouldn’t get political.)

            Sheetz got cute with their ads, too. In the mid 80s, they had a 64 ounce fountain drink they called “The Pig.” And wouldn’t you know it, the slogan was “Take Home A Pig.” I’m not making this up! They started serving fresh coffee anytime and put blinking lights on the coffee makers to tell you when the coffee was old. If you got coffee when the light was blinking, it was FREE. Great, that’s just what I need—a free cup of BAD coffee.

            I have to tell you this true story about the Greenwood Sheetz in the early 90s. They had a guy that worked there overnights and this guy wore regular clothes. He refused to wear the uniform! He seemed to have a bad attitude, too, cause he never said much when you checked out. One time I got gas but forgot to take the nozzle out of the tank before I drove away. I just felt a slight tug, heard a thunk, and away I went, never looking back. I just hope that guy doesn’t remember me. Somehow, I doubt he’s even there anymore.