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Main:.Metro:.Lahore		Lahori Wedding By Rehana Sheikh
		There are usually four seasons in a year but not in Pakistan. Additional ones include the floods season,the Election season and our all time favourite the Wedding season. Here is an acocunt of a 'traditional Pakistani wedding' although such a thing does not exist in reality as each province and each community has its very own traditional style of wedding although there is not much of a big difference. The wedding ceremonies described below are typical of a hindustani style, the way us dilli-waley perform but is generally followed throughout Pakistan.
		Day-1: Quran Khwani & Khatam This marks the beginning of all wedding ceremonies and is traditionally the only all-male event that takes place. Although many people now organise Khatams for Ladies too which however mostly endup in discussions over dowry and barri. The Holy Quran is recited preferabbly in the house of wedding and prayers said for the Bride and Groom. The family cleric or pir saab or any local Imam is usually invited to bless the occasion and is offered with gifts and clothes. Many people sacrifice goat/sheep in the name of Allah to bless the wedding. Many also distribute food to the poor in daigs. Both the Bride and Groom's families hold these functions at their homes or nearby mosques. Day-2: Dholki For the girls of the house, this is the real beginning of shadi -an urdu word meaining celebration. This is the a ladies-only event with Bride's friends taking control of the function. Dholki is infact a small drum that is played on weddings. The sound of Dholki announces celebration and many old people believe it wards off any evil spirits or bad-wishers nearby. Perhaps that is why this event is held inside the Bride or Groom's house. Nowadays playing the Dholki and singing shadi songs is losing significance as big sound systems make much louder noise and girls dance to the beat. For some, this night is a good practice session for the big even - the Mehndi. For the Groom's family Dholki is not much of an event unless his sisters and friends are crazy for party. He himself usually hangs out on perhaps 'his last night of freedom' with friends. Day-3: Mayun This event formally marks the beginning of the wedding. By this day, all the near relitives have arrived and the big lineup of ceremonies begins on this night usually in the house courtyard or lawn. The Dulhan- Bride usually wears yellow although many modern kind perfer jeans with a yellow kurta these days. A small band called Ganna is tied on her left wrist by some great aunt or the grandmother. Other ceremonies include tipping oil in hair and henna on the palms, the latter being traditionally reserved for the Mehndi. Later usual dholki, songs and dances follow with many aunts taking to the dance floor this time. The Groom has his own Mayun at his home and a similar Ganna is tied to his left wrist. His aunts and cousins pour oil in his head and give money bills - the salamian which are a key part in all the wedding ceremonies. The gannas are thought to bring luck for those still unmarried. Thus many people tie them to their friends or cousins after wedding day. Day-4: Mehndi "mehndi taan sajdi jey nachey mundey di maan..." Till now, only the relatives and close friends had been invited but this big event draws huge audiences from door-par relatives to the Khan's from the next street. Nobody wishes to miss this function. Although traditionally this used to be another ladies-only event with only men of the house present and took place in the house courtyard or lawn, but not anymore. Nowadays Mehndis are celebrated in outdoors with huge tents erected for the occasion or five star hotels and Shadi halls. Modern times have replaced dholkis with huge sound systems, smoke machines and flashing lights. Mehndi today has become the most waited-for function of shadi. Most people prefer a combined function with both the Bride and Groom's sides having a song and dance competition. The main purpose for Mehndi had been to color the Bride's hands and feet with henna - Mehndi. Now this makes up a small part of the main event.. the dances. Groom's side brings traditional folk drummers and his friends and brothers dance called Bhangra. Traditionally girls bring in large trays filled with henna and candles and perform a luddi whereby they dance in a circle around the big trays. The big feast is another attraction of this event many people look forward to which comprises typically of halwa puri. Day-5: Barat-Nikkah-Rukhsati "bari duroon sey aayi barat saiyaan mein tu nachoon gi...." Although some people perform the Nikkah, the religious obligation of marriage, before the actual marriage but many still prefer it on the day of Barat.A small ceremony Sehra bandi is performed before departing. Traditionally the Barat- Groom's procession to Bride's home or the hotel nowadays, used to comprise of men-only. Nowadays women go with their men too. The Groom or Dulha wears a sparkling Sehra, a headgear to cover his face and used to ride on a horse or a horse driven buggy. On arrival a small ceremony called Milni is performed when two elders from both sides embarce and exchange gifts - this marks the bonding of the two families. Some essential items brought with the Barat include the burri which are clothes and gifts from the Groom's family for the Bride and her family, and the bidd which comprises of dates, nuts and sweets for the guests distributed after the Nikkah ceremony. After Nikkah the Bride is brought to sit with the Groom on the stage. She is traditionally clad in a crimson-red outfit and loads of gold jewellery. In old times, this was the first time she would see the Groom's face, when a mirror was brought for them to see each other. Numerous ceremonies are performed at this point including a gift of gold watch or a ring from the Bride's father to the Groom. A long family photograph session then begins. Later Doodh Pilai is done when a glass of milk is brought for the Groom by the Bride's younger sister who gets some money in return. Juta Chupai is when Birde's sisters, cousins and friends take off one of the Groom's shoes and ask for money in return and usually get away with thousands of rupees. Later, the Rukhsati marks an emotional end to ceremonies for the Bride's family when they bid her farewell as she departs off to a new life with her partner. Ceremonies performed here include bringing the Bride to her transport under shade of the Holy Quran, the Bride throws some rice over her head and a lamb is scrificed in front of the transport. The mother, sisters embrace the Bride and see her off. The Bride's father covers her head a big piece of cloth Chadder. A brother and a family maid usually accompany the Bride to her new home. The dowry or Jahez if not handed over before is also departed with the Barat. The brother returns the same night or next day but the maid usually stays. Upon arrival at Groom's home, numerous ceremonies are performed including one where Groom's sisters and cousins block the front door and ask for money before they allow his wife to enter their home. The Groom's mother presents the family bracelets or some other jewellery to the Bride and introduces her to the ladies of the house and other relatives of the Groom. Day-6: Valima This is a reception hosted by the Groom's family in honour of the Bride and all the Groom's friends and family are invited. The Bride's family and near relatives are also invited for the function. Traditionally this used to be a rather sober function but nowadays alongwith family photographs and gathering, a live musical evening is also arranged. Day-7: Chotha or Mukhlawa This marks a formal end to all ceremonies of the wedding when the Bride returns to spend a day at her home. The Groom is introduced to the Bride's family. The big Lunch is the main event of the day.

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