The following are actual insurance statements, where the drivers were asked to explain the cause of accidents in the least amount of words possible.
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1. Coming home I drove into the wrong house, and hit a tree I didn't have.
2. The other car collided with mine, without giving any warning of it's intentions.
3. I collided with a stationary truck, coming the other way.
4. The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve several times before hitting him.
5. I pulled from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law, and headed over the embankment.
6. In an attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.
7. A truck backed through my windshield, into my wifes face.
8. I had been driving for forty years, when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident.
9. I thought my window was down, but found it was up when I put my head through it.
10. I saw a slow moving, sad faced old gentleman, as he bounced of the roof of my car.
11. I was on the way to the doctor, with rear end trouble, when my rear end gave way causing me to have an accident.
12. As I approached the intersection, a sign suddenly appeared where no sign had appeared before. I was unable to stop in time to avoid the accident.
13. To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front of me, I struck a pedestrian.
14. My car was legally parked when it backed into another vehicle.
15. An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.
16. I told the police I was not injured, but on removing my hat I found I had a fractured skull.
17. I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the road when I struck him.
18. The pedestrian had no idea which way to run as I ran over him.
19. The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy, in a small car with a big mouth.
20. I was thrown from the car as it left the road. I was later found in the ditch by some stray cows.
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Email: davefr@bellatlantic.net
