This is the page I have anxiously waited years to fill in. In the beginning of August 1998, I decided to create a database using Microsoft Access. I searched the Web, centering in Pennsylvania, for any and all Thomas' and Reddens. I entered each listing that had an address into my database, created a master letter with a scanned picture of me at age 4 in Microsoft Word, mergered my letters and bought stamps. With the support and assistance of my youngest daughter Antoinette (Toni), stuffed 157 envelopes, put return labels on each, and stamped them. Wrapped in several rubber bands, I put them on my "to be mailed" shelf by the door...they were finally done! I had decided to have them mailed by mid-August. This was the first batch of mailings I planned to do. I decided that if I didn't have the reponses I was looking for by September 1st, I'd then get names and addresses for New Jersey and Delaware since they are neighboring states within reasonable driving distance. Over the weekend, I asked my youngest son and daughter-in-law (Ricky and Kelly)to please mail them for me...I felt too nervous to do it myself. Doing something like this can be very intimidating for fear of immediate rejection, as well as not wanting to disrupt anyone's life in case I actually reached the right person. My husband (Vince) and children (Vince and Dawn, Tina and Dave, Robert, Rick and Kelly, and Toni) are and have always been very supportive and encouraging.
I held my breathe, but only for about 48 hours after the letters were mailed. Phone calls started coming in from people apologizing for not being related but supporting my search and right to know. So far, I have not received 1 negative response either via phone or in writing. One of the first calls I received was from a woman (Terry) stating that she thought I was a cousin. She stated that she would be happy to tell me anything I wanted to know and if she didn't have the answers I was looking for, would call her father and get them. I returned her phone call rather quickly. She was just wonderful! We figured out that her grandfather and my grandfather were brothers! Her father remembered my mother and grandmother. With this information, I decided to create a family tree (at my husband's suggestion because of my emotional memory). That same day, Terry mailed her uncle's book (I survived Alcatraz twice) and a family crest and history. I was so excited when I read it and somewhat amazed!
Within the second week, I received a call from a lady stating that she knew her husband was definitely my uncle and that he wanted to see me. My heart sank! A blood relative really wanted to meet me! I called her back, spoke to her for over an hour. She and her husband (Robert and Irene) knew me and thought I should know what happened. Uncle Robert was my mother's brother. My mother was one of twelve (12) children! He stated that my memory served me well, as my Uncle Billy and Aunt Peggy wanted to adopt me but my mother wouldn't let them and took me away from them. They are my Godparents, and I have lived with them for about one year after my family split up. My grandmother just died last February, so I once again, missed a reunion with someone who was important in my life because of Pennsylvania's laws to protect. My aunt invited me to visit which my husband and I set up a date to meet in September.
This is all the info I have at this time, but will continue my saga after my visit with them.
September 12, 1998: I had my reunion with Uncle Bob and Aunt Irene! Vince and I arrived about 15 minutes early because it was closer than we expected. Since Vince had to make a pit stop (bathroom) and they weren't home, I had him leave me at their home. Since no one was there, I decided to sit at the picnic table in the backyard and wait.
After a few minutes, a black truck pulled into the driveway, went up the hill and parked. The man from the truck began walking down the hill toward me and the house. As he got closer, he seemed to grow pale. I asked if he lived in this house and he said yes. My heart took a leap! He came over and hugged me with such emotions that I was really shocked! He said "You have to be Anne". We walked to the front of the house as he told me he dropped his wife off before he went up the hill to park his new "toy".
Upon entering his home, Aunt Irene came into the room and also gave me a big hug...such emotion I am not used to! We sat at the kitchen table and compared pictures, was offered coffee and an ashtray (I was prepared not to have any coffee or smoke during my visit). Although many people smoke and drink coffee, Aunt Irene says it is a "must" for any Redden..."it's in their blood and it usually buries them". By this time, Vince had returned and they received him with great emotions also. The feelings were so confusing to me...how can such an emotional family allow one of their own to give away the children? I decided I would ask before the end of our visit. I wanted most of all to know my nationality. To my surprise, I am English, French-Canadian, Welsh and Dutch. I know nothing of any of these nationalities (I can see many more hours on the internet searching). I was told that I am French, Italian and German by my aparents. Although no one knows much of my bdad's family history, they only know that he had Dutch in him and he is dead. He lived in the next town to them and Uncle Bob inquired with the local authorities before my arrival. My bgrandmother was French-Canadian, my bgrandfather was English, my bdad was Dutch and God knows whatelse.
I look like my mother at a young age. Uncle Bob asked how many siblings I knew of. I named them and he was surprised that I could remember them. He then handed me list from Aunt Peggy that included a few more. I also have another older sister by the name of Anna Marie (I was Anna Mary), a younger sister Mary Agnes who I remember but forgot about, and a brother Billy who is older than Butchie. I vaguely remember Billy but only because he was so nasty.
Uncle Bob and Aunt Irene answered any question I asked without hesitation and told me they feel that I have a right to know everything because this is what I'm made of. My bdad left my bmom which I already suspected, money was impossible as she didn't work, her mother still had young children at home to raise and did not want any more, as she had 12 kids of her own! I found out that my bmom's sister Anna also gave up her children to adoption. One of her children searched and found Uncle Bob and Aunt Irene who helped them reunite with their bmom and each other before she died. Pretty cool attitudes for older people! Two hours flew by so fast! They asked us if we wanted to go out for dinner to Aunt Peggy's restaurant as her family wanted to meet me. We followed them there. We were told that Aunt Peggy wasn't able to wait for us (sounded set up ahead of time) because she promised to be at her Grandson's first football game. No problem...don't break promises to children! Her son Billy is part owner of the restaurant and was there with his wife Rose and daughter Trish. He came over to meet us. There they were!!!! Those beautiful brown eyes that I forgot I loved! I lived with Aunt Peggy and Uncle Billy for about 1 year before my bmom placed me in an orphanage. I can remember playing in the bathtub with Billy when he was about 1 year old. I remember he also had a baby brother Steven. How great it was to look into the Redden brown eyes! Now that was emotional for me! He said "Hi Cousin!" He told me that he often looked at my pictures and questioned his mother who told him I should have been his big sister. He asked if we could come back again when his mom would be there. They also want to meet my kids! In my mind I kept saying "they really want us to return!" Unlike my reunion with my brother Butchie, this was very hard to comprehend. Someone really wants us to become part of their lives!
We stayed for about 2 hours more, then had to leave as everyone had previous plans. I was given the restaurant's phone number to call when I could bring my family and they would be prepared with pictures and more time.
When we arrived back home, my two daughters were anxiously waiting. What great support systems! They were so happy for me (as all the kids were when they called). We are planning our next visit on October 17th.
Well...this is the end of my search for my birth parents! My next mission is to find my siblings! Keep watching for a continuation of the saga of My Life As An Alien!
My Favorite Links
Angelfire - Easiest Free Home Pages
WhoWhere? - The Best Communications Guide on the Web
Matt's Script Archive - Awesome Web Server Scripts
CareerPath - Where Employers and Employees Click
