Charlie: BOO!
Felicia: Suck my dick.
Charlie: You don’t have one.
Felicia: That’s what YOU think.

Billie: Can I have a dime? I’ll be nice to you for a week.
Jasmin: Fine. Only a week? Where’s Christian?
Billie: With your mom.
Jasmin: This dime is going to the dirt! Stop involving my mother in things! She can do better.
Charlie: Are leprechauns bovine?
^Jasmin walks away mumbling over bovine leprechauns.
Then turns around and yells:
Jasmin: I gave you a dime Kathleen! Now you have to go away!
^Charlie sneaks up, Jasmin turns around^
Jasmin: YOU TOO!

Charlie/Billie: LEPRECHAUN!
Zach: I’m not a leprechaun! ^points at shirt^ This is not green! Or blue! Or anything related to green!
Billie: Your pants are blue.
Charlie: Your orange shirt CONTRASTS green.
Zach: Whatever. I’m not Irish.
Charlie: You said you were half.
Zach: theoretically. ^rolls eyes^
Zach: (to other boys down hall) Do you know these girls? (boys shake heads) you are SO lucky. ^looks at ceiling^ why me??? God, why have you forsaken me?
Charlie: Hey! That’s a song!
Zach: Yeah, ive sang it.
Charlie: By System of a Down?
^zach walks away^
Billie: That’s a chruch song, you moron!

Movie: Protein makes wool burn!
Charlie: That’s why sheep burn so well.
Patrick: You need to seek help.

Charlie: ACID!
Patrick: No! I mean, go ahead.
Charlie: Can I drink it?
Patrick: Yes, I will even take the cap off for you.

Billie: Who wants pez?
Gabby/Patrick: Me!
Billie to Patrick: You can’t have any, cause you’re a bitch.
Patrick: Please?
Billie: Fine but he’s still a bitch.
Gabby: But he’s a bitch with pez!

Bluebomb: I don’t have any porn!
Charlie: Hey Bluebomb, remember the time we stole
your porn? Bluebomb: Yeah I was pissed.

Charlie: Smell ya later!
John (CMG): Smell me now.

Charlie: I gotta go studyish
Charlie: testies.

Charlie: I don’t think he’s here today.
Billie: Yes he is.
Charlie: He’s wearing teal.

Sarah: She has a sparkly ass.
Bluebomb: Lemme see!
Charlie: Quit smacking me with bush weeds.
Megan: They’re flowers, dumbass.

Billie: There’s a hole in that rock.
Charlie: Most of them are.

Bluebomb: Why are you always apologizing?
Billie: Cause your mom’s a whore.
Bluebomb: That’s not your fault.

Bluebomb: What else do I have to do?
Billie: Your mom.
Bluebomb: I’ll do her later.

Charlie: You know the screaming catapiller?
Jasmin: Kettle corn?

Charlie: You poked me in the eye!
Jasmin: Na ah! It was your eyebrow!
Charlie: Well, right here. ^points to somewhere
between her eye and eyebrow^ Jasmin: Bullshit!....It was a little more to the right. ^evil smile^.

Ryan: Im’ getting my braces changed thursday. Im gonna do different colors.
Nyell: Like a rainbow?
Ryan: Sure...
Nyell: Cool! you can promote gay pride in your mouth!

Bluebomb: What the hell are you doing?
Billie: Your mom.

Bluebomb: What time is it?
Charlie: Scott.

Sarah: I’m all wet!
Bluebomb: I know how that goes.
Liz: But that’s different since you’re gay!

Leprechaun: You like guys too, right?
Bluebomb: No!

Charlie: Mmm...hot hitler on a table, nothing beats that.
Matt: Moussilini’s weiner.
Charlie:...maybe in YOUR fantasy...

Liz: What else was there besides "put your mouth over it and blow"?
Leprechaun: Oh, that reminds me...

Billie: It’s the lastest thing, everybody’s doing it!
Jasmin: Eww..my mother?

Leprechaun: What are you guy’s doing?
Charlie: YOUR MOM!

Charlie: Bluebomb humps coral!
Bluebomb: Oww!

Leprechaun: It wiggles, it jiggles.
Bobby: It pulsates from side to side.
Andrew: And it’s covered in delicious white cream.

Joaquin: What if God was one of us?
Patrick: He would smite you.

Patrick: You homophobic, and specist bastard!
Joaquin: You smell like fecies.

Sarah: It smells like vagina in here.
Liz: Well you better get used to it.

Nyell: No one believes in them though.
Billie: Except for Bluebomb who humps them all.

Billie: Charlie’s puking.
Billie: She wanted me to tell you.
Matt: Aww she’s so sweet.

Nyell/Bambie: oooh, can i borrow $10 for tomorrow?
Poo: why do you need 10 bucks? lol
Nyell/Bambie: So we can eat. Me and bambie spent our last bit of money getting fire.
Poo: eat the fire.
Nyell/Bambie: it tastes like burning.

Nyell/Bambie: Bambie will give you sex for $9.98......
Poo: hmmm...is she hot?
Nyell/Bambie: yeah and we'll throw in a free goat!
Poo: A GOAT!?!?!? WOW!

Charlie: I’m a tiki.
Pistachio: Say good night, tiki.

Charlie: There IS no other Carrie.
Charlie: She liiiives in Georgia.
Charlie: With Vampire!

Tom: Swarzenegger?
Charlie: That sounds like a French dish.

Carrie: GO TO SLEEP CHARLIE!!!
Charlie: Yesss, Mother Nature.

Carrie: Tell him to screw Egypt.
Tom: Where Mexican is a first language.

Carrie: Can you count them?
Charlie: I don’t know my alphabet that well.

Carrie: Go to sleep now, Atticus.
Charlie: Or else I’ll get put in a concentration camp.
Tom: Exactly.

Carrie: It wants you, Charlie.
Charlie: The alien?

Carrie: Broadway and Ina don’t meet Charlie...
Tom: They do in her world.

Zach :I never start my homework until after 10 pm each night.
Matt: Homework is overrated.
Zack: Hey, I say that all the time.
Matt: I know, I got it from you dumb-ass.

Drew: So how do you say your name anyway?
Tristian: I don’t know.

Bluebomb: Technically, you COULD get AIDS from a misquito.
Billie: Only if it was psycho.

Charlie: You’re wearing green.
Bluebomb: Eagles!
Charlie: Watch out for poachers!

Billie: Don’t run over my son!
Charlie: You better reach under and get ‘im before I change my mind.

Ms. Chapman: What HAVE you been smoking?
Mrs. Markham: Obviously coke...a cola.

Patrick: So why don’t you send him a valogram?
Bluebomb: But that would be stalkerish...
Patrick: But you’re stalking him.
Bluebomb: Yeah...

Blaise: That’s abusive.
Patrick: You’re abusive.
Blasie: No, you’re abusive.
Patrick: Your mom is abusive.
Blaise: That’s up to you, Cheif.

Billie: You’re gay!
Bluebomb: You’re gay!
Charlie: I’m vibrating...

Leprechaun: Hey, guess what I wore yesterday!
Billie: Your mom?
Leprechaun: How do you wear people?
Billie: You don't want to know.

CMG: So, what did you do this weekend?
Charlie: I smuggled drugs into the nation.
CMG: In your new submarine?
Charlie: Duh.
CMG: So what'd you really do?
Charlie: Your mom.
CMG: AGAIN!?

Radio: KFMA will be right back.
Charlie: Where's it going?

Bluebomb: What time do we get out of class?
Billie: Negative six.