“Emily?”

Emily Quartermaine opened her eyes slowly, their brown depths reflecting a combination of exhaustion, worry, and the remnants of the painkillers the doctors had given her before they had set her arm and repaired the damage from the bullet.

“Lucky?”

“No sweetheart.” Emily smiled sleepily as she felt a gentle hand brush a stray tendril of hair off her forehead. “It’s me.”

“Sonny.” Emily tried to sit up as she forced herself to wake up, despite the fact that her lids were heavy and her mind foggy. “Where are we?”

“Some WSB facility in Switzerland. Geneva I think. The helicopter picked us up at the safe house after it picked you and that Masters guy up. You passed out during the flight. The doctors operated on you a little while ago. Your arm is going to be fine.”

Emily closed her eyes for a moment as she struggled to remember the events Sonny described. She’d been shot trying to escape Faison’s compound, she remembered that much clearly. She and Lucky had met up with Frisco and that was when Faison had been there with Robin and....

This time she sat up despite Sonny’s protests. “Robin?”

A shadow of something indefinably sad crossed Sonny’s face as he shook his head. “She slipped into a coma. It doesn’t look good.”

“God no.” Emily’s voice was a harsh whisper as she turned her head to the side. She was so damned tired of losing people she loved. She looked up, afraid to ask.

“Lucky?”

Sonny shook his head. “There’s no word yet, but they say that doesn’t mean anything. They’ve got a communications black out over the entire region until they finish cleaning up Faison’s operations.” He forced Emily to look up at him by gently lifting her chin. “I’m sure he’s okay.”

Emily nodded with a shiver. She’d wanted to stay and wait for Lucky, had resisted Alex’s efforts to get her into that second helicopter. It was only Alex’s quiet reminder that it might take Lucky a while to find Faison and that Lulu and Sonny were vulnerable in the safe house that had led to her reluctantly getting on that plane.

She looked up at her friend. “Are you okay?”

Sonny smiled at her. “I’m fine.” He sat next to her and tried to smile. “I’m just glad that you’re okay.”

Emily frowned despite the fuzziness in her head and her worry over Lucky. Something wasn’t right.

“Sonny?”

He closed his eyes and opened them again. “She’s going to die hating me for what I did to her.”

“Robin?”

Sonny nodded. “I hurt her when I sided with Jason. Why in the hell did I do that anyway? In all the stupidity of my relationship with Brenda, Robin never chose between us. Yet the minute I’m given the chance to do the same for her, I blow it. I drove her out of Port Charles.” He drew a deep breath. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be talking about this with you.”

Emily smiled shakily. “You mean because Jason killed my grandfather.” She left unsaid what Jason had tried to do to her. “The Jason I remember before Carly, before he became obsessed with Michael, is not the Jason that is in prison right now. That Jason was loyal and supportive and someone I knew that I could always turn to. Or at least I thought I could until everything .....went wrong.” She shook her head. “I think that Jason was worthy of your loyalty. You couldn’t know what would happen. What Jason would become.”

“No but I knew what Robin was. What she would always be. She was ... the person who kept me sane after Stone died. I should have ....been there for her.”

“I’m glad you weren’t.” Emily’s weirds were low and fierce and Sonny stared at her in shock. Emily flushed and tried to explain. “I’m not...I wouldn’t want anyone to get hurt like that...but if you hadn’t sent her to Paris.... If she never met up with Frisco....Never joined the WSB.....” Emily shuddered. “They would never have rescued Lucky from Faison. And the thought that Lucky would still be in that bastard’s clutches...”

Emily interlocked her fingers to keep her hands from shaking. “I’m not saying that there aren’t things to regret in the past. God knows I have my own mistakes to make up for. Only the thing is Sonny that we can’t change the past and the past is the reason, for good or bad, that we’re where we are. Here. Now. Sometimes I think I would have been better off if I had stayed that naive teenager that thought the sun rose and set on Jason. If I had never known what they had planned for AJ, I would never have been hurt by the truth of Jason’s ruthlessness. But then I would never have known my grandfather the way I did or never have become friends with AJ like we are. I would never have became who I am and I like who I am. And I guess the real ironic thing is that if Carly and Jason hadn’t done what they did to all of us, Lucky would never have come back into my life.” Emily stared at Sonny, her brown eyes shining with a fierce intensity. “To have what I have with Lucky, makes everything else worth it.” She smiled softly. “And I bet if you asked her Robin would say the same about Frisco.”

“She loves Jones.” It was a question not a statement.

“More than anything.” Emily replied.

Sonny was silent for a moment and when he looked up at Emily, it was with eyes that were more than a little haunted. “Do you think when Robin wakes up, it will be too late for me to apologize?”

Emily reached for his hand and held it firmly. “I don’t think it’s ever too late to apologize to someone you love.”

And in the silence of the room, Sonny thought he felt the beginning of forgiveness.

'Cause there's a lighthouse, in the harbor
Shining faithfully
Pouring its light out, across the water
For this sinking soul to see
That someone out there still believes in me

Alex Master’s approached the bed softly, his eyes filling with sorrow as he took in the silent figure connected to the battery of machines that walled the room or the broken figure that sat without moving, holding on to Robin’s hand as if his physical touch was enough to keep her there, keep her with him.

Alex swallowed. Maybe it was. He hoped so. God he hoped so.

“Lucky?” Frisco’s eyes didn’t move from Robin.

“No word.” Alex moved closer. “Donnelly’s ordered a complete black out. He could be on his way here and we wouldn’t know it until he walked in the door.”

“Or he could be dead.”

Alex shook his head. “Don’t underestimate him. He’s good. Maybe even great.”

A ghost of a smile flickered over Frisco’s expression. “He should be. I trained him.”

Alex pulled up a chair next to him. “She’s going to be okay. The doctors said her chances are good.”

“If she comes out of this damned coma.” Frisco’s voice shook. “If she dies...”

“She won’t.”

“If she dies...” Frisco finished with a shudder. “I don’t know if I can handle it.”

“You will.” Alex’s voice was soft, even. “You’ll have to. Too many people are counting on you. Donnelly. Lucky.” His voice dropped softer. “Your kids.”

“I know.” His voice cracked. “I just can’t imagine...I’d be so damned lost without her.”

“Then don’t imagine it. Hold on to your faith and let it help you hold on to her.”

Frisco looked at his friend. “When did it get so complicated Alex?”

“The spy game? Oh hell Jones it’s always been complicated. We were just too young and too stupid to know better.” Alex gaze shifted to the steady pulse of the heart monitor. “We were so caught up in the thrill of being secret agents that we never stopped to count the cost of being a super agent.” He shifted. “This life can make you crazy you know, first it takes your life and then it becomes your life. Look at you, you walked away from a wife and kids for the agency without a second thought.”

“Oh there were second thoughts. And third thoughts. And fourth thoughts. God knows I have a lot to make up to my kids for. Still when I think of what we do...”

“You wouldn’t give it up for anything.”

Frisco shot him a rueful grin. “Almost anything. If my kids needed me...but they don’t really. Mac is a good guy. Hell, he raised Robin so I can’t complain that he doesn’t know what he’s doing....”

“But he’s not Maxie or Georgie’s father.”

“No,” Frisco acknowledged softly. “But he’s been more of a father than I have. God knows I regret that, but I’m not sure I would change that even if I knew how to. What I do is who I am and as much as I love my girls I can’t change that.” He looked over at Alex. “What’s on your mind?” He raised an eyebrow. “You thinking of coming back to the agency full time? You know Sean would move heaven and earth to have you back...”

Alex shrugged. “I’m not ready for that yet. There are ....things I need to take care of.”

Frisco frowned. “God in all of this I forgot about Jocelyn....”

“She’s dead.” Alex confirmed softly.

“I’m sorry. I knew how much you loved her.”

“That’s just it. I didn’t. Or at least I did but not the way I should have. Not the way you love Robin. I cared about her. I cared about her a lot.”

“But you didn’t love her?”

“Not like I loved”

“Ava.”

“That obvious?”

“Only to someone who spent three weeks with you in a Central American prison.” Frisco grinned despite everything. “So you going to try to get her back.”

“I don’t know. She’s dating this lawyer and she’s got this new life built for herself and the kids in Florida and God knows we hurt each other a lot in the past....”

“Do you love her?”

Alex nodded.

“And do you think she still loves you?”

A pause and then another nod.

“Then don’t let her go again. If there’s one thing I’ve learned is that second chances shouldn’t be thrown away.” He traced a finger down Robin’s arm.

Alex let out a soft whistle. “Do you even begin to know how incredibly lucky you are Jones? She’s beautiful, smart, and not only does she love you but she loves the game almost as much as you do.”

“I know. It’s crazy just how well we fit together. Sometimes I look at her, really look at her, and I wonder what I did to deserve her and I know, I know, it wasn’t enough. I love her so damned much.”

“I know.”

“We’re getting married you know.” Frisco smiled softly. “The plans were driving her crazy. Every time Felicia would send her a fabric sample or suggest a new “theme” I could see the frustration.”

“Felicia? You’re ex-wife is planning your wedding?”

Frisco stared at him and Alex’s laughter quieted. “As I was saying. with all the craziness I know that she wanted the ceremony to be perfect. Me? I could marry her on a street corner in a rainstorm and be happy. But Robin wanted the world to know how happy she was....”

“How happy you made her.”

“Whatever I gave her, it was nothing to what she gave me. She is my one true thing, you know?”

Alex thought of a petite brunette with green eyes and nodded. “I know.”

Suddenly feeling like he was intruding, Alex stood up. “I’m going to check to see if Spencer has checked in.”

“Alex.”

“Yeah?”

“Bring Ava and the kids to the wedding.”

Alex grinned. “I will. Thanks.”
On a prayer, in a song
I hear your voice and it keeps me hanging on
Raining down, against the wind
I'm reaching out 'til we reach the circle's end
When you come back to me again

Anna Scorpio watched her comatose daughter through the glass wall, her eyes dark and reflexive. It had been hours since the events at Faison’s villa and there were moments when she thought her mind would shatter taking it all in.

Thirteen years. Faison had stolen thirteen years out of her life. When the explosion on the yacht had occurred Robin had been a little girl. She could still see her in her mind’s eye- long dark hair, huge brown eyes full of a million questions, an innocent spirit that made you want to protect her, cherish her.

So much had changed. Robin wasn’t that girl anymore. She was a young woman. An adult. Capable. Tough. Independent.

Did she even need a mother in her life anymore?

“Of course she does.”

Anna turned and frowned as Sonny approached. Sonny smiled at Anna, having left Emily in the process of having her arm checked by the surgeon he had decided to check in on Robin.

Sonny ignored the frown. “How are you?”

Anna turned away from him. “I’m fine.” It was the standard answer she had given a dozen times over to the WSB psychiatrists who had wanted to “debrief” her. It was the answer she had given Sean Donnelly on the vid phone when he had called from the plane to check on Robin. It was the answer she gave anybody who bothered to ask, not that there were that many that bothered to ask.

She knew what it was to feel like you didn’t belong somewhere, but this, this feeling of being the ultimate stranger in a strange land, was new even to her. Twelve hours ago she had been the wife of a man who she believed loved her and the mother of a beautiful child.

Then she had learned that that life had been built on a lie. Faison hadn’t rescued her, he had tried to kill her. Worse he had killed Robert. He hadn’t helped her escape from prison he had kept her imprisoned. Remembering the months she had spent chained to the bed, fed drugs intravenously, and subjected to brainwashing techniques not even the DVX knew about, Anna almost wished those memories hadn’t come back. She took pride in the fact that she knew that breaking her hadn’t been easy. She’d almost escaped once, made it ten miles across the countryside before Faison had caught her. The scars criss-crossing her back were proof of how he had rewarded that little escapade.

Somewhere along the line, her reality had twisted and she had found herself buying the warped vision that Faison had created.

The fact that they had been lovers under any circumstances had made her want to vomit.

She couldn’t find it in her anywhere to be sorry that she had shot Faison, but she hated the fact that she was in some way responsible for Robin’s condition.

“I guess Robin didn’t inherit her inability to lie from you.” Sonny responded as he looked her over critically. “Any fool in their right mind could tell you weren’t okay.”

Anna shot him a scathing glance.

Sonny shrugged as he turned away from her to stare at Robin for a few minutes.

“It wasn’t your fault, you know.”

Anna said nothing.

“What he did to you... he was a sick bastard and you were just one of his victims.”

Anna bristled. “I am not a victim.”

Sonny looked her up and down softly. “No, I guess you’re not.” He turned back to the glass. “At least now I know where Robin gets her strength from.”

A few more minutes of silence.

“It was Robert who gave Robin her integrity, you know.” Anna didn’t look away from her daughter. “Robert was this walking contradiction. He was a spy and damned good at it. If he needed to he spin a yarn that would have made the Brothers Grimm look like amateurs. Yet in his friendships, in his personal relationships, Robert valued honesty above everything else. It was almost as if because so many things in his life were fake he needed the important things to be real.” She paused. “He would have liked it that she became an agent and at the same time he would have hated it beyond anything.” She shook her head softly. “Robert Scorpio was a good honest man. Me? There were times in my life when I was anything but. Yet for Robert’s sake and for Robin’s sake, I tried to be you know. I didn’t always succeed. I was never as good a person as he was, no matter how hard I tried. ” She sighed and her breath stained the glass with fog. “I still don’t know why I survived and he didn’t.”

“You won’t ever know and you’ll drive yourself crazy trying to figure it out.” Sonny whispered quietly. “Trust me, I know.”

Anna stared into the depths of his dark eyes. “I think you do.”

They smiled, a tentative smile but a real smile nonetheless. “So what are you going to do when this is over?”

“From what Frisco said, I gather my daughter has a wedding to plan. I’d like to help her if I can. Touch base with old friends for a while. And then who knows....maybe I’ll see about getting my old job as police commissioner back.”

“I think Mac would love to give it back to you.”

“Mac is the police commissioner?” Anna’s laugh startles both of them. “Somehow I can’t imagine Mac changing that much.”

Sonny grinned. “I think it was having to raise Robin.” A pause. “Your daughter tends to bring out the best in people.”

“She does at that.” Anna looked up. “You care for my daughter?”

Sonny nodded. “We went through a really bad time together. Robin is very special to me.”

“Yet I’ve seen you around Frisco and he hates you.”

“He has reason to.” Sonny met Anna’s eyes honestly. “I hurt Robin very badly. When she wakes up, I hope to apologize to her. Although I’m not sure she’ll let me.”

“She will. She may not accept it, but Robin will at least listen.”

“I hope so.”

They were silent for a few minutes.

“Do you like Italian food Anna Devane Scorpio?”

“Immensely.”

“Good, I own this little Italian restaurant in Port Charles and when all of this is over I promise you a meal that you won’t soon forget.” He hesitated. “That is if you want to.”

Anna smiled. “I’d like that very much.”

There's a moment we all come to
In our own time and our own space
Where all that we've done, we can undo
If our heart's in the right place

A plane over Italy

“Lucky?”

Lucky Spencer looked up from the laptop he was working on. Borrowed from another agent, it wasn’t nearly as fast or as efficient as his own, but it would do. His eyes narrowed as he looked at the information on the screen.

It was impossible he knew it. There was nothing he could do.

He’d lost another game of solitaire.

“Lucky?”

Lucky looked over at his dad. Didn’t Luke get it? He didn’t want to talk about what had happened earlier. He’d done enough of that when he had been helping the sweep team dispose of the body and go through Faison’s villa to find what they would need to stop Faison’s organization world wide. He’d uploaded data to WSB Satellite links, broken codes on locked files, and handled a few little suprises that Faison had had installed into the system.

He’d managed to do all that without thinking. Without feeling.

So didn’t Luke get it? This was Lucky on automatic pilot in agent mode and he preferred it that way. He didn’t want to talk about it. Couldn’t talk about it without breaking down.

He’d break down when he felt safe.

Later.

He picked up the stack of papers on the seat next to him.

“Cowboy?”

He lowered the papers. “Don’t call me that.”

“Then talk to me.”

“All right.” Lucky smiled mockingly. “How do you feel about the Rams for the Super Bowl this year?”

Luke scowled. “Don’t play games with me.”

“You asked for conversation. You got conversation.”

“Cowboy....”

“I said don’t call me that.” Lucky’s voice was low and threatening.

Luke stared at his son in shock. The hours since he had found Lucky with his gun on Faison had been a nightmare that he couldn’t seem to shake free from.

“Why not?”

Lucky looked away, hesitated for a moment, and then turned back to Luke. “That’s what he used to call me.”

Luke swore.

“Brings a whole new meaning to the term ride em cowboy, doesn’t it?” Lucky’s voice was filled with bitterness.

Luke flinched

Lucky stared at the father he had once worshipped and now barely knew. “I’m not sorry he’s dead.”

“I don’t imagine you would be.”

“And I’m not sorry I killed him.” Lucky voice was cold and even. “He deserved to die for everything he did to Robin and Lulu and Anna and Emily....and me.” Luke shivered at the remoteness in his son’s voice. “It felt good to kill him.”

Luke didn’t know how to reply to that statement and he didn’t even try.

Lucky’s voice took on a far away quality. “Funny thing is that all this time I thought if Faison was dead all of it would go away too. And now he is and it hasn’t. It’s still there. Nothing’s changed except that I know he can’t hurt me or anyone that I love again.” Lucky looked over at Luke. “And that feeling is worth everything to me. Everything.”

“Lucky...” Luke hesitated, feeling sick to the pit of his stomach just thinking about it. “What he did....what happened to you...it wasn’t your fault.”

“You can’t say it can you?” Lucky laughed harshly. “You’ve killed people in cold blood Luke. You were Jason’s paid killer. You’ve done things I’d probably have to arrest you for...but you still can’t say the word, can you. Why? Does it destroy some of that famous Spencer mythology to realize that your son was raped? Not once but over and over again.”

“Lucky...”

“I hated you for it you know. Blamed you for so much. I mean mom was mom but you...you were the Luke Spencer. How could you have believed I was dead? How could you have stopped looking for me? How could you have let him hurt me?”

“If I had known.....” Luke’s voice trailed off helplessly.

Lucky shook his head. “I said hated. Blamed. Past tense, okay? Faison was good at making you believe what he wanted you to believe. He wanted you and mom to believe I was dead. He wanted me to believe that I wasn’t worth anything. He succeeded on both points for a little while, but we both know better now. You know I’m alive. I know that that life has meaning. I have friends. A job I’m damned good at. Emily.” Lucky took a deep breath and let it go slowly. “ It’s over, okay? Life goes on.”

“I don’t know what to say.”

“Just nothing sappy okay? Something tells me that I’m going to get my fill of sappy from mom.”

“Are you planning on telling her?”

“I wasn’t planning on telling YOU, but since you know I might as well tell mom.” Lucky grimaced. “God knows I wouldn’t want you to have to keep a secret.” He was silent for a moment. “You know I think that’s one of the things that hurt the most.”

“What?”

“When I came back.” Lucky shrugged. “All the time I was held, I kept remembering things. What it was like when you and Mom and I were a family. What it was like to hold Elizabeth in my arms. What it was like to be your son. Lulu’s brother. All of the things Faison took from me, he couldn’t take those things and I held onto them so damned tight. Then when I did get back, nothing was what I thought it would be. Mom was married to Stefan. You were back in the mob. Nikolas and Elizabeth... Everything was changed. Even Lu was older than I remembered and I almost hated her for it, like she had a choice. I was so bitter that none of you fit any longer into that perfect little world I had held onto for so long, that I didn’t realize the most ironic thing of all.”

“What?”

“That I no longer fit into that world either.” Lucky tapped his hand against the closed computer case. “You couldn’t endure what I had endured and be the same person. It wasn’t possible. Just like you and Mom and Elizabeth and Nikolas and Lu...you couldn’t endure what you had endure thinking I was dead and moving on with your lives and still be the same person. None of us could go back and the only other direction was forward.” Lucky almost smiled. “And forward for me was Robin, Frisco, the WSB....and Emily.”

“What about us Cow...Lucky? Is there room in your new life for me?”

Lucky looked at his father. “That depends. I’m not the boy who worshipped you anymore and I can’t be that kid again. I can’t turn a blind eye to your faults and pretend they don’t exist. If you’re in the mob...”

“I’m not. I run a club now thanks to your girlfriend. Besides the mob in Port Charles is almost dead.”

“Don’t kid me Luke. I’m not Emily, I don’t have her blind faith in people. You and I both know that there will always be a mob in Port Charles. And we both know that a part of you will always want to be a part of that scene. You see the glamour and you want it. But I’ve seen for myself the other half of that life- the death, the destruction, the innocents who get hurt. I can’t pretend its just a job like any other job anymore. If you choose that life again, then you’ve made your choice and you need to know it.”

“All I want is a chance to get to know my son again.”

Lucky closed his eyes. “No guarantees okay? Just....give me some time and space.”

“As much as you need.”

“Just one thing.”

“What?”

“What Faison did...kidnapping me and everything else, destroyed our relationship. I don’t know if we can rebuild it. I do know it won’t be, can’t be, the same. But your relationship with Lulu....that one you’re destroying all on your own. You have to accept that Mom and Stefan are together. Stefan is Lulu’s stepfather and she loves him. But that doesn’t mean she can’t love you if you just give her a chance to get to know you. Don’t let her grow up with a father she doesn’t know.”

“I wasn’t intending to.”

“Good.” Lucky stood and stretched, checking his watch. “We should be on our approach. I’m going to check with the pilot.”

“Lucky?”

Lucky stopped.

“Are you going to be okay?”

Lucky hesitated. “I will be. Once I know Robin is going to be okay and I can hold Emily again, I’ll be fine.”

Luke shook his head. “You need help to help you deal with ...the rapes.”

Lucky turned back to Luke with a wry grin. “I know. I’ll get it. If I didn’t go for counseling voluntarily, my guess is that Emily would pretty much pester me until I gave in. I’d also guess that by now she’s spoken to Kevin Collins and he’ll be waiting for me when we get back to Port Charles with his leather couch ready.”

“Sounds like she’s definitely become a Quartermaine.”

“Oh Emily’s a Quartermaine all right.” A smile crossed Lucky’s face for the first time since he had killed Faison. “But she’s my Quartermaine.”