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silver pennies

half awake, i stand on the doorstep,
ink on the morning paper still damp,
my hands smearing the words.
-julie suk

these days i sometimes think that i am still standing alone to fight my fight, but more often i find myself held up by the arms and words and smiles of many supporters. there was a time when i was alone in my grief, like a solitary martyr everyone has forgotten.

then, one by one, people came, their eyes sometimes brimming with tears and their mouths full of flowering words to sprinkle down into my alabaster ears. as i spoke, people listened, hearing of the pain i had endured, congratulating me on the battles i had won. i learned to care for myself, to reach out for help, to accept kindness.

each of the people i encounter throughout each day affect me. some with smiles, some with tears and scowls. there are many people who do not know i was violated, who are still part of my support system. this page is divided into two parts. this first part is designed to thank everyone in my life, all of the people who continually brighten my day and make me realize how wonderful it is to be alive. the second part, the pennies, is where i thank several people who have had profound effects on my healing.

here i would like to thank:

my entire family, in all its various incarnations.

the girls of the theatre co., who have helped me get this far.

my online support system (especially amanda, steve, mercutia, blue girl, jona, luci, christine and ed).

wonderful skye, who made the beautiful emergence award, banner, and survivor badge.

josh, because i love him immensely.

my childhood friends, who helped me learn a lot of things about the world.

hannah, one of my most trusted mentors.

my cats, because if i ever need cuddling they are always around.

click here to count the pennies