Fireworks to start what should be an interesting Smackdown....
Here comes the BIG SLOW along with SHANE MCMAHON. Big Slow is wearing big leather pants to show how tough he is. Shane rambles on about what happened Monday. He feels it isn't acceptable for a father to hit his own son. He says abuse is against the law. Big Slow looks confused. Shane says Big Slow is still going to WrestleMania. How you may ask? Shane says that never was it said that if Big Slow lost his match against the Rock on RAW, he wouldn't go to WrestleMania. All that was agreed upon was that if the Rock won, he would go to WrestleMania. Put two and two together and what do you get? A 3-way match for the WWF Title. Here comes THE GAME. Big Slow tells HHH that he will win the WWF Title. HHH tells Shane McMahon that Big Slow can't beat him, nor can the Rock. Shane O'Mac will be in Big Slow's corner at WM, while the Slut will be in HHH's corner. Stephanie says she has just as much power as Shane, to which Shane calls her a cheap slut. What kind of brother is he! And to finish the triangle, non othe r than VINCE MCMAHON arrives. Crowd is hot. Vince says they make him proud as a father. Vince says that watching the two of them jocky for power everyweek is like watching a bad soap opera. Go on Jerry Springer and settle it says father McMahon. Vince then brings Mick Foley into the promo, which draws a big "Foley" chant. Vince says they drove Foley out, and tried to drive the Rock out, and folks, that's NOT good for business. Vince is back to take control and seize the reigns of power once again. Vince finishes things off by saying that WrestleMania is now a family affair, and that he will be in the Rock's corner at WrestleMania! Shane then orders a Rock vs. Kane match, McSlut orders Big Show vs. Rikishi, and Vinnie Mac orders HHH vs. someone Stephanie is close to. Who is that? The Godfather! Ha! Stephanie will take a ride on the ho train! This rules! MA-CHINE! MA-CHINE! MA-CHINE!
Ad for the WWF Rap album, in stores March 21st.
EDGE & CHRISTIAN vs. DUDLEY BOYZ - Tag Titles Match
Why is this match on Smackdown? Brawling from the start. Dudleyz in control early. Cole & Lawler talk about how sick the Dudleyz are. The boyz nail the off the top rope low blow headbutt on Edge. D-Von goes for an elbow but Edge moves out of the way and nails a spinning side kick, followed by a hot tag to Christian. Swinging 2nd rope DDT on D-Von by Christian which pulls a 2 count. D-Von then knocks out the ref, Christian nails the inverted neckbreaker for the 1-2-3, but wait, no ref. Here comes Terri, sends a chair into the ring. You know the rest. 3-D, 1,2,3. Afterwards Terri celebrates and the Hardy Boys come down and throw her in the ring to Edge & Christian and Edge spears Terri! Aw, she is hurt. Winner: THOSE DAMN DUDLEYZ
In the back, HHH & STEPHANIE are WALKING AROUND!
HHH vs. THE GODFATHER
HHH hammering away on the Gfather. Knee to the face of the Godfather, but Godfather eventually counters w/ a clothsline. Rights in the corner on HHH, followed by a elbow to the chest and a back bodydrop. Stomps in the corner and a whip, followed by the Ho-Train but HHH moves out of the way. Face of the Godfather to the knee of the Game. Here comes SHANE MCMAHON & THE BIG SLOW. Business is about to drop. HHH clocked the Big Slow off the apron. The two brawl on the outside. Big Slow rams HHH into the STEEEEEEL post. Big Slow sends HHH back in the ring, Godfather with the cover, 1...2...3! Godfather beat HHH! That's woah.... Winner: THE GODFATHER
In the back THE GAME is upset, so he messes up his dressing room.
THE ACOLYTES vs. HEAD CHEESE
Snow tells Blackman that Sci-Fi is big now so he proposes "Snow/Blackman: Outer Space Ninja", then brings out a little alien. Hehe. Lot of brawling to start. Both sides swap control often. Crowd chants "Head Cheese". Big double clothsline by Faarooq, who tags Bradshaw. Now all four men in. Al Snow has head and nails Mideon with it. Bradshaw nails the clothsline from hell on Blackman for the win. What a sloppy match.... Winner: THE ACOLYTES
In the back it's RIKISHI. You know what he is doing? WALKING! Then they show the BIG SLOW who is also, gasp, WALKING!
BIG SLOW vs. RIKISHI
Hopefully the ring won't collapse in this one. Big Slow attacks Rikishi on the outside and sends him into the STEEEEEL. In the ring, Big Slow nails some chops, kicks, and elbows in the corner. He then moves Rikishi to another corner and does the same thing. He is an amazing technical wrestler. Rikishi counters a whip and nails a big kick to Big Slow which knocks him down. Big Slow then gets a face full of ass. That is a disturbing move. Rikishi starts slapping his ass which opens the door for Big Slow to nail a HUGE clothsline, followed by a big slam. Here comes THE GAME & STEPHANIE. Steph on the apron, Game in the ring. Pedigree on Big Slow, Rikishi to the 2nd rope....BOOM. After the match, TOO FOOLS come down and dance w/ Rikishi. Winner: RIKISHI
KURT ANGLE in the back w/ BACKLUND. They demonstrate the crossface chicken wing on one of the event staff workers....
BIG SLOW in the back, he is upset & confused so he throws things around.
KURT ANGLE & BACKLUND vs. Y2J & TAZZ
Kurt says he will restore Long Island's economy just like he did for Europe, HA! Backlund gets the mic and gives a baffling interview. I worry about Bob sometimes. Angle & Backlund w/ many tags to start but Y2J comes in and takes control. Double powerbomb on Angle followed by a Moonsault. Backlund breaks it up, but Tazz runs him out of the ring. They are now brawling in the crowd. Tazzmission on Backlund in the crowd. Back in the ring, Walls of Jericho on Angle but here is CHRIS BENOIT who breaks it up. CHYNA goes to work on Benoit but EDDY GUERRERO then comes out and takes her out. Benoit & Guerrero take everybody down. Winner: NO CONTEST
JONATHON COACHMAN is talking and KANE comes and asks him where X-Pac is. Ok.
Earlier today, ELROY was in "Funtime USA" playing arcade games when the HEADBANGERS came in which means....
ELROY vs. HEADBANGERS - Hardcore Title Match
Wierd match in a cool setting. Bangers take out Crash for a few minutes, but when it's time for the pin, they can't decide who to pin him. Bangers then decide to hit him with a hammer but Crash ducks out and runs away into the balls. Some really creative spots and the match finishes with Crash running out.... Winner: CRASH
Video package of MAE YOUNG's current WWF stint and the powerbomb off the stage from last Monday. That is one tough old lady.
In the back, KANE attacks DX. They brawl into the back of a truck and DX locks him in. Haha, stupid Kane....
VINCE MCMAHON in the back. If Kane can't face the ROCK now because he is locked in a truck, well then it will be X-PAC vs. THE ROCK.
GRANDMASTER SEXAY vs. DEAN MALENKO - LightWeight Title Match
Don't let the name fool you, Deano Machino is no MACHINE. EDDY SUCKS comes down too to boost ratings. Some back and forth wrestling to start. Dean to the outside. Sexay nails a baseball slide on Malenko & Eddy. Malenko back in the ring, suplex is reversed by Sexay, followed by a bulldog. A second bulldog attempt is reversed by Malenko and Sexay is sent into the turnbuckle. Lot of back and forth action. Crowd behind Sexay. Sexay nails a huge kick and gets more than a 3 count but Eddy distracts the ref. Malenko now in control. He mocks Scotty Too Hotty's worm. Scotty Too Hotty takes out Malenko, Sexay to the top but Eddy knocks him out, leading to the 1-2-3 for Malenko. Afterwards, TOO FOOLS take out Malenko and Eddy. Eddy leaves but CHYNA comes down and knocks him out. Chyna then celebrates in the ring w/ Too Fools. Winner: DEAN MALENKO
WWF OFFICIALS are in the back trying to get KANE out of the truck. Haha, stupid Kane....
THE HARDY BOYZ vs. BENOIT & SATURN
Everybody brawls to start. Jeff Hardy is slingshotted over the top rope to the outside. Benoit and Matt in the ring, Matt in control. Swinging DDT attempt is countered and Benoit takes control. Tag to Saturn. Saturn continues to work on Matt. Benoit back in. Crowd somewhat dead for this one. Benoit & Saturn nail a nice tag move on Matt who is still in and getting beat on. Saturn slams him into the turnbuckle. Saturn goes for an off the top rope move but Matt knocks him off the turnbuckle and nails a splash. Jeff Hardy gets the hot tag and takes out both Radicals. Hardys now in control. Double suplex on Benoit. Benoit & Jeff on the outside now and Matt nails a big splash from the top to the outside followed by an over the top rope move by Saturn to the outside. Wild stuff. The ref has thrown this one out since it is chaos. Winner: NO CONTEST
In the back, X-PAC is upset because HHH always "get's him into stuff like this". HHH says don't worry because he will get X-Pac out. What a great friend.
THE ROCK WALKS AROUND IN THE BACK!
3 weeks 'till WrestleMania....
THE ROCK vs. X-PAC
Brawl starts on the outside. Rock sends Pac into the crowd. Back to ringside now where X-Pac turns the table and sends The Rock into the crowd where they brawl. Rock fights back and clothlines Pac to the floor. Back to ringside. Rock slams Pac into the STEEEEEL post. Here comes SHANE MCMAHON and THE BIG SLOW. Rock and Pac finally in the ring. Shane tries to grad the Rock's foot leading to X-Pac nailing a clothsline on The Rock. Crowd chants "Rocky". Now on their way down to the ring, THE GAME & STEPHANIE. Rock and X-Pac trading rights. X-Pac sends Rock over the top rope where the Big Slow attacks the Rock followed by HHH attacking both Rock and Big Slow. Rock back in the ring. X-Pac in control w/ a headlock. Rock fights out and nails a spinebuster. Both men down now. X-Pac up first but Rock nails consecutive rights on X-Pac. More rights and Rock plants X-Pac with a big swooping slam. Tori provides a distraction which gets X-Pac back in control. Pac symbols for the Bronco Buster but no, Rock is up and nails a Rock Bottom. He goes for the cover but Big Slow pulls the ref out. X-Pac in control now but here comes KANE. Kane and X-Pac brawl into the crowd while Rock, Big Slow, and HHH fight in the ring. Rock's music hits and he leaves. HHH and Big Slow continue to brawl though as Vince McMahon watches on in the back with a smile on his face. Hmmmmm.....
Winner: No Contest
[Credit: 411Wrestling]