A post Justin was responding to
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*NOTE: This post was written by Lance - 12/08/01.
First of all, I realize this kid was a leader, and that he accomplished a lot, not just a lot - but that he was phenominal. He took on the world and he won.
I don't like to see him compared to someone like Matthew Shepard - and I know people are going to come down on me over this, but I don't
Not to take away from all his accomplishments during his short life...but to hold him up as a martyr, to make him a gay icon...is - and this is my own personal opinion - I think its wrong.
It glorifies suicide. It makes suicide look romantic. It makes it appear that killing yourself is somehow a sacrifice for others or for the "cause" and that's just BULLSHIT.
Killing yourself is a selfish act. Period.
Now everyone who loved him or cared about him has to go on living. Is it their fault he committed suicide - NOOOO But deep down inside they will think that it is.
No one is responsible for anyone else's happiness. NO ONE. And if he cared about them, if he loved them, he wouldn't put them through this awful lifetime of sadness and guilt that they will feel the rest of their lives.
Did he ever once stop to think about how his parents/friends/loved ones - people that he really really cared about - whoever they are - did he ever stop to think about how they are going to feel this christmas? How they are going to feel every christmas after this.
Did he ever stop to think about how he was leaving this great big hole in their lives that will NEVER be filled?
So if there's anyone who reads this that has been thinking about suicide and thinking - everyone would be better off if I wasn't around - you are FULL OF SHIT.
You are being selfish. If you are thinking about killing yourself, and you want everyone else not to have to put up with you (or whatever you are thinking) then what you need to do, is talk to a professional, get yourself diagnosed, if you have clinical depression, get some meds. You don't have to feel like this. It's like taking an aspirin for pain. You don't have to feel all this pain when its caused by a medical condition like clinical depression.
And if it's something like your b/f broke up with you, or you failed a class or you dont have a best friend, then you need to take a look at the big picture. In ten years - will you CARE that some guy broke up with you or that you had to take a class again? NOOOOOOOOO.
Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. And its stupid and selfish AND I hope people don't hold this kid up as a gay icon. His death is tragic, but it was his choice. Matthew Shepard didnt have a choice.
As for Fred Phelps....that man is a fucking vulture. He has made his life's work enjoying other people's suffering. he is a maggot from Hell.