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   [IMAGE]

   [TABLE NOT SHOWN]

   You know you're from Canada when ...

   1. You only use three spices: salt, pepper, and ketchup.
   2. You design your Halloween costume to fit over a snows
   uit.
   3. The mosquitoes have landing lights. 4. You have more miles on your
   snowblower than your car.
   5. You have 10 favorite recipes for moose meat.
   6. Canadian Tire, on any Saturday, is busier than the toy stores at
   Christmas.
   7. You live in a house that has no front step, yet the door is one
   meter above the ground.
   8. You've taken your kids trick-or-treating in a blizzard.
   9. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled in
   with snow.
   10. You think sexy lingerie is tube-socks and a flannel nightie with
   only eight buttons.
   11. You owe more money on your snowmobile than your car.
   12. The local paper covers national and international headlines on two
   pages, but has six pages of hockey.
   13. At least twice a year, the kitchen doubles as a meat processing
   plant.
   14. The most effective mosquito repellent is a shotgun.
   15. Your snow blower gets stuck on the roof.
   16. You think the start of deer season is a national holiday.
   17. You head south to go to your cottage.
   18. You frequently clean grease off your barbecue so the bears won't
   prowl on your deck.
   19. You know which leaves make good toilet paper.
   20. You find -40C to be a little chilly.
   21. The trunk of your car doubles as a deep freezer.
   22. You attend a formal event in your best clothes, your nicest
   jewelry, and your Sorrels.
   23. You can play road hockey on skates.
   24. You know four seasons: Winter, Still Winter, Almost Winter, and
   Construction.
   25. The municipality buys a Zamboni before a bus.
   26. You understand the Labatt's Blue commercials.
   27. You perk up when you hear the theme from "Hockey Night in Canada."

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