In a stark contrast to the fast paced "action movie"-ish fighting game franchise, XBV takes all the guys (except for Zack), out of the picture and the girls are suckered into attending the fourth DOA Tournament, only to find it was a gag. Following his victory in DOA3, Zack made it big in Vegas and bought an island paradise where the girls find themselves and naturally what you do when you’re tricked into stepping into paradise is… play volleyball.
And that’s kind of where this leads us, in a bizarre turn of events, the girls begin 14 days of swimsuit sporting, volleyball spiking, shopping madness! Each session with a girl lasts for 14 days, each days consists of 3 events. An event is anything from having a girl lounge around in a empty spot, a volleyball game, or a trip to the poolside. And yes… they bounce. Oh, do they bounce. The fan service is a huge incentive to buying the game, even though I’m actually quite fond of volleyball, the last Volleyball game I actually BOUGHT was on the NES, the chesty DOA ladies offer great incentive to… well… any human male with even the slightest interest in the opposite sex.
The volleyball game itself is about as accurate about the rules of volleyball as NBA Jam was about basketball, which is to say, it isn’t. Team Ninja went to great lengths to dumb down this sport to the use of two buttons and most of the work is done for you as you play anyway. The key thing to do in this game is TIMING your button pressing down to an art for everything from serving, blocking to arranging for a spike. The pool is a great way to practice this with the Hopping Game, but honestly Tecmo… I would’ve paid $60 to actually see them fall in the pool and climb out, all wet. ^_^ I mean, it may just be me, but that would’ve… well… It would have been marvelous!!!
Volleyball isn’t the only amusement on Zack Island, no no. There’s shops to spend all the Zack Bucks you earn in games (particularly GOOD games) and the hopping game. And besides watching the girls relax by the pool or in an empty spot whilst you play with the camera angle and zoom buttons, you can take a chance or nine at Zack’s Casino! But with the scantily clad beach babes and the cool little extras… is this game worth more than a trunk full of porn? Read on!
Why it sucks:There’s no one handed control scheme!!! But on a more anal retentive note, the whole bloody thing is like a glorified mini-game! Everything feels like its supposed to be a distraction from something else! Would it have killed them to include the fighting game in this? Thrown in bumper boats or… something?!? Making it a four player Mario party-esque game would’ve been great as well! The replay value wears itself out pretty quick, I’m sad to say. Watching Zack’s island blow up, and Zack get eaten by a shark was all very amusing, but that’s the ONLY ending you’ll be seeing sadly and it’s always the same, fortunately you can skip it.
While the timing thing makes for a fun challenge compared to normal volleyball, the window for button pushing is awfully limited, which can be incredibly frustrating… And when it comes to the cool stuff like Videos (DOA, DOA2 test shots, DOA3 promos, Ninja Gaiden promo, etc.) you’ll often have to play through multiple times before you actually get anything since the only way you can get them is through Zack’s evening gifts, which themselves are totally random.
Why it rules: Oh my… They bounced again… There’s nothing quite like a computer generated babe in skimpy clothes that never seems to get comfortable so she always… adjusting. The good points are quickly obvious to any testosterone enriched male who sees that the compulsion to buy this treasure is unquestionable. The most fun you have with this game is when you and a couple of buddies gather around to gawk and stare in silent (yet horny) awe. It’s actually quite fun to play, the only annoyance is the hit and miss partners. You normally start out with Lisa and she leaves you at a certain point when she considers your skills to be far above hers, then you have to give gifts and such to curry favor with the other ladies of the island in order to recruit a new partner. Each time you're off to curry favor, you'll see one of the other lovely ladies hanging out in the tropical paradise making herself vulnerable to your prying eyes. Currying favor involves buying gifts and giving them to girls either when you track them down to certain spots on the island or have them sent to them before you go to bed in the hotel. The girls will often return the favor (or the gift, if they don't throw it away!) and each night you will ALWAYS get a gift from Zack and so we now move on to the collections... Probably the only real accomplishment you can achieve is getting a complete collection of stuff ranging from swimsuits to shoes to DOA commercials/previews/demos to previews for Ninja Gaiden. There's A LOT to collect and it is a pain in the butt to do so since only so much is made available to one girl. To get just ONE girl to have everything, you have to use another girl to BUY a certain suit, shoes, etc. and pray that they either wear what you give them or do anything but throw them away. It's the only way you'll ever see Kasumi dressed as a playboy bunny. Besides the unyielding eye candy from both the lovely ladies and the breathtaking environs which surround them, there's the awesome feature of playing music you've ripped from your CDs to the Xbox and you can adjust and save your very own playlist of music along with all the "Tropical Paradise"-ish songs included with the game already. Get in another player and you're in for a good time, the camera has some annoying issues, but it's not all that bad. It's just a pity there isn't a "watch" mode... because I like to watch. Huh huh huh...
Overall: You'll never find a more obvious guy game. With incredible graphics, lots of suggestive poses and bouncing from half naked game goddesses and some of the most shallow gameplay you'll EVER encounter; DOAX is a no brainer. If you have an Xbox and already know about it, then you've either got it or making plans to steal/barter/borrow it. If not then you could care less if the whole franchise burst into flames. To put it simply, DOA:XBV is like a vacation from real gaming, think of this as the definitive buffer game to take a break from a long RPG, or a cheap platformer boss. Sun, surf and busty women sauntering about a tropical paradise half naked, all the while jamming to your favorite tunes. Being an overpriced mini-game, it's hard to condone the purchase of this unless you are of course... Male. But hey, when in doubt, always rent. Just make sure to route your Xbox through your VCR when and if you do.